Goldie and Me

By Andrew M. Cruz

Author Andrew Cruz's cautionary tale of loss and betrayal ends with events surrounding the death of his father, Charles in 2009. But the story begins in Los Angeles, California. It is the story of 5 brothers growing up with parents who were first generation and who successfully navigated a marriage, getting an education, starting a fam

• Language: English
• Publisher: Go To Publish
• Release date: May 11, 2021
• ISBN: 9781647494292

Book preview

Acknowledgements

There were many people that helped me complete this book. I would like to thank each one of them. Starting with my family. My wife Karen, my son Tony, my daughter Kristin, my brother Michael, my aunt Lou Ann Lynch, and my niece Hunter. To my friends Rick Leventhal, Bob Page, Frida Sanders, Erica Kirby, and Dina Lee, thank you all so much. They were all given an advanced copy of this book and helped with editing and gave me invaluable input. I would also like to thank my niece, Hunter, and brother, Carlos for doing the cover art.

Also thank you to Benita, my cousin, and her husband Lem for their encouragement throughout this endeavor. I would also like to thank all those who sent me notes of their recollections during the time this was taking place; Carlos & Rick, my brothers, Benita, Robert Stevens, my father-in-law, and Mike B., one of my dad’s best friends. Without the help of all these people I would have never finished and probably still be writing this book.

An extra Thank you to LouAnn Lynch for the synopsis.

And last, but not least,

Thank you, Mom and Dad.

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Forward

This is based on a true story. The names have been changed to protect the innocent. This is my story, it is my opinion, and based on the facts as I saw them. Most of what I have written is from my recollections and the notes I had taken as I went along. All the papers that were left by my dad, both intentionally and what I discovered going though all his paperwork that he had left behind after his passing. My wife, Karen also helped me with the timeline and shared what she recalled.

This project really started as therapy for me. When my dad passed away, I was never given time to grieve. I was thrust into a position that started immediately after he died. This part of those times is only part of what I had to deal with… it covers only two years. December 2009 to November 2011. I have been dealing with my dad’s estate for a little over ten years as of December of 2020 and it continues today. There was a whole lot more that I went on.

I do not know what conclusions you may draw from this book, but know this, I have always loved and respected my dad. At times it may sound like I do not, but I always have and will. Two things that I want to bring your attention to are the transfer of family wealth and the collection of a spouse’s pension.

First, the transfer of family wealth. There are different circumstances in every individual’s passing. In this case, my mother had worked very hard all her life. She made an incredibly good income and put money away for when both of my parents retired. I am not saying my dad didn’t make a nice income, he did. I am speaking of my mom because she died before him and I wanted to share her thoughts. Before she passed away, she spoke with me about life without her. She wanted us to take care of my dad. She wanted us to keep the house, so any of us guys always had a place to live, if needed, a place to celebrate the holidays. She warned me of the vultures who would come around seeking what the two of them worked so hard for. She let me know that all their hard work was for their retirement and for the five of us boys. These were her wishes. She did not work so hard and save so much for someone to come along and take it. For the most part my dad shared the same feelings, at least that is what he shared with me. Simply put, my parents had money and property that they shared, my mother died, and their money and property became his money and property.

As it should be. Then he got remarried and he died, the new spouse took, well I should say was given a nice amount and, in my opinion stole the rest. When I say good amount, I must add that when my dad retired, a couple of years before my mother passed away, he started to collect his government pension. When he remarried, he paid it all back so that when he died his new spouse could collect it and it is a for life benefit. This means his widow will collect this payment for the rest of her life, she was fifty-six when he passed. That’s the second issue, she knew and was married to him for a total of three years and for her three-year investment she gets $4,206.00 a month for the rest of her life. She claims she only gets $2,800.00 a month. That is half true; I believe that is with the taxes taken out. I just wonder how much of our taxes go to the surviving spouses of dead government employees. I am not saying that some people don’t deserve this benefit, I’m talking about the ones who go after the older person and take advantage of them. Maybe the government could save a lot of money if they would only pay this benefit out for the length of time that the couple were married. If they did, she would only collect for 30 months. I think it is a good idea.

Just a warning, when making your Last Will and Testament make sure you dot your i’s and cross your t’s. Also, let all your final wishes be known to all your beneficiaries. Also speak to your chosen Executor. Let him or her know exactly how you want your estate divided.

Update: As I wrote this book, I stated that I did not know my dad’s grandfather’s name that raise him. On February 18th, 2021 I was going through my father’s military records and found out my great-grandfather’s name, it was Charles Millford. He was listed as my dad’s beneficiary and grandfather.

PART I

1

My Dad always tried to teach us many life lessons as we were growing up. By us, I mean my four brothers and me. There were three lessons that really stuck with me. God, Family, Country. Your word is your bond. If one of you come home with a black eye, then all of you better come home with a black eye. Well, I came home with a black eye and none of the others did.

My Dad was born in 1931. I really do not know much about his life as a child. What I do know is that his father left his mother and their three children, Evette, Alexander Charles Jr. (my Dad) & Isabelle. The reason he left was never discussed by my father. He did tell us that his mother, Elizabeth, she went by Liz, raised his two sisters Evette and Isabelle. My dad’s oldest sister and my mother both had the same fi rst names.

He once told me a story about my grandmother Liz, probably the only story that I can remember. Frank and Charles, two of my brothers, were going repelling at Sugarloaf Mountain here in Maryland. Jokingly I said to Charles, if you don’t make it back, can I have your stereo?

My dad said, You should never joke that way. My mother was extremely sick and in the hospital. I visited her to try to bring up her spirits. She was surprised by my visit and asked me, what are you doing here? I said I’m here to measure you for your coffin. She died a few days later. My dad told me he never got over the guilt and I should never joke like that again. Both Frank and Charles made it home safely.

I do not know why but my dad was raised by his maternal grandfather and grandmother. He spoke highly of his grandfather. He had great respect for him. I remember he always wore and cherished a gold watch that his grandfather left him when he died. As much as he praised this man, he never mentioned his name. As of this writing I could not tell you what it was. His grandmother, my great grandmother, he never mentioned her name either. All I know is that they lived in El Paso, Texas. According to my dad they lived better than most of his friends in El Paso. His grandfather had owned a small store and provided for the family. I have no knowledge of when either of his grandparent’s deaths occurred. I do not remember them in my lifetime, so I assume they passed away before 1960.

My dad joined the United States Navy when he was seventeen years old. At the time, from what he told me, he had a girlfriend named Darlene. The following story came from several reliable sources. When my dad came home on leave after four or five months of service Darlene was two months pregnant. Supposedly one of his friends was the culprit. My dad did the honorable thing, and she became the first Mrs. Cruz. In September of 1950 Darlene gave birth to a boy, they named him Dick Charles. The next year Moe David came along followed by Pam (I do not know her middle name). Both David and Pam were born on November 10th, but one year apart. Siblings born exactly one year apart (aka Turtle Twins). It was 1953. Very shortly after Pam’s birth, Darlene and my dad decided to get a divorce. My dad ended up with the boys. When I asked my dad why he did not raise Pam I was told his mother-in-law wanted to raise her. He said, if he did not agree that his mother-in-law and Darlene would fight for custody of all three of the kids. My dad told me he really did not want to separate the siblings but went along because he believed it would be difficult to raise a baby girl by himself. Later in life this decision would come back to haunt him in the form of drunken nasty phone calls in the middle of the night from Pam. He stated that she would use the filthiest language. Language that was worse than he had heard when he was in the navy.

A single dad, he worked as a salesman for Eureka Metals. He also went to school at night. That is where he met my mother, Evette, the second Mrs. Cruz. My understanding was that it was in law school. I believe it was a small community college in California.

Evette was the oldest of seven children. Tammy, Sam, Betty, Audrey, Randel & Otto. They also lived in El Paso Texas with their parents, Frank and Charlotte. My grandpa worked for the railroad and grandma was a stay-at-home mother. That is all I really know. I never saw them as a couple, they were separated, and grandpa lived with us until he died of a heart attack in 1967 and grandma passed away in 1992.

Evette and Charles were married in November of 1956. The reception ended in a brawl between my dad and my grandpa when grandpa was asked by my dad’s best man, How do you feel about being a grandfather of three children? Grandpa had just learned the secret that everyone else already knew. That this was not my dad’s first marriage.

By the way, the best man was the friend who was the suspected culprit who got his first wife, Darlene, pregnant.

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My Aunts Audrey, Tammy, Betty and my Mom (seated)

The following year they had their first child, Charles Alexander Jr., he really was not a junior because Dad’s name was really Alexander Charles Cruz. Frank 1958, Andrew 1960 (that’s me), Mark 1961 & Hank 1962. The boys as we were later referred to. One strange thing, my dad had another set of turtle twins, Frank and Hank shared the same birthday but four years apart. Dick and David were still in the picture and lived with us for a little while. Dick was married in 1968 and David ran away to Arizona the same year. David later joined the Marines. I was happy to see him go, but that is another story. A weird thing happened growing up with Dick and David, we, my four brothers and I, started referring to our father as My Dad. The reason behind this was that Dick and David would argue with my mother and say things to her like I’m going to tell My dad or My dad said I could. The five of us picked up on that and started calling him My dad. To this day if we are talking about him to each other we refer to him as My dad. Friends have questioned us about that for years. I cannot tell you how many times I heard isn’t he his dad too!

During the years of the five of us being born My dad finished law school and was ready to take the bar exam. Well, he tried and tried and tried, he did not pass it. That bar exam must have been tough, I guess. Three times he tried and three times he did not pass it. What he did do is get a job working for the District Attorney of Los Angeles. Evelle J. Younger was his name. During my dad’s time with the Los Angeles district attorney’s