BROKEN JADE: A Novel

By Paul Chan

One family, two very differerent worlds. When same sex marriage is approved in Australia, Sydney lawyer Justin Wong calls home and turns his mother Madeline's world upside down. Madeline is a respected society matron and a church elder in her hometown, Tenangan. Born into poverty, she is a Malaysian success story. Meanwhile, Justin has fought h

• Language: English
• Publisher: PHHC
• Release date: May 25, 2020
• ISBN: 9780648857617

Paul Chan

Paul Chan has worked as a lawyer, book editor and university lecturer. He travels the world in search of good food, but is a very lazy cook. Broken Jade is his first novel. He is currently working on his second.

Book preview

AFTERNOON NAP

Madeline Wong peeled off her cheongsam, draping the silky garment over a chair for the maid to put away. Opening the doors to her wardrobe, she retrieved her favourite cotton smock and pulled it over her head. The faded, threadbare fabric cooled and comforted her skin. Catching her reflection in the dressing table mirror, she was tempted to remove her makeup, but she had to leave home again in two hours. Madeline had never liked makeup, but keeping up appearances was important in a town like Tenangan.

She lived in a large house on Merbau Heights, with distant views towards the Straits of Malacca. An armour of elaborate hair, pale face powder and tailored costumes proved that her days were spent in air conditioned environs, out of the sun. Many townsfolk downhill lived in shorts and T-shirts, better suited to the stinking tropical heat.

Barely two hours down the highway from Kuala Lumpur, Tenangan was a regional centre. It had a large public hospital, several banks and many schools, but lacked the industry of the big city or the historical, tourist-mecca glamour of neighbouring Melaka. With neither an influx of young workers nor hordes of visitors to bring in new ideas, it had stubbornly retained a slow pace of life and a small town attitude. Family connections were essential and things were done a certain way. The town was surrounded by endless acres of oil palms and a smattering of durian and dragon fruit plantations, where rubber trees and native jungle had once stood. Meanwhile, KL kept creeping closer in its relentless expansion, threatening to turn Tenangan into another satellite town for commuters.

Far from a day of rest, Sunday was the busiest day in Madeline’s week. Earlier that morning, she had been to church, followed by a tedious meeting with the scripture committee. After the meeting, the committee members had adjourned to their weekly yum cha at Lucky Gold Restaurant. Over dim sum, they continued bickering with thinly veiled animosity over the Church Outreach Project. It had failed to progress after a year of endless meetings and deliberations. Madeline had bitten her tongue until the very end, when she could no longer restrain herself.

‘Aiya Mr Seah, you give up too easily! Tell them it’s our final offer. If they sign by Wednesday, they get all the work. If not, we never use them again,’ she had bluntly chided the chairperson. Poor Mr Seah had quickly wilted in the face of Madeline’s criticism. Remembering how readily he had agreed to her action plan, while ignoring his wife’s glare from across the table, Madeline smiled to herself as she settled into her reclining chair and raised her swollen feet onto the footrest. Although she gave the Seahs all due respect as fellow church leaders, she found their showy piety distasteful. They had locked horns several times over the doomed project. Carefully arranging her head so that her stiffly sprayed hairdo would retain its shape while she rested, she drifted off quickly. The ceiling fan whirring softly overhead cooled her skin with its soothing breeze, and the sounds of the gardener watering her precious orchids outside cast a hypnotic spell over the suffocatingly still afternoon. Living high up on a hill made no difference on days like this, when all the doors and windows had to be shut tight to keep out the noxious haze. Thick smoke caused by forest clearing fires in Sumatra had drifted all the way across the sea to Tenangan and its surrounding areas. With no breeze to lift it, or rain to wash it away, the haze had blanketed the town for weeks on end.

Suddenly, the ringing of the telephone in the hallway startled Madeline out of the deep slumber she had fallen into.

‘Ah Kau,’ she murmured her husband’s name, imagining he was by her side in bed. There was no reply. The shrill ringing continued insistently, disturbing the peace. Emerging into foggy reality, Madeline realised that she was alone in her bedroom, in the middle of the day. Rubbing her temples, she remembered that Ah Kau had gone back out to play golf shortly after Jacob, their driver, had dropped them home from yum cha.

‘Ayu!’ She called out to the maid instead, but still no one came. Muttering to herself, she started clambering out of her reclining chair. Just then, she heard Ayu running up the stairs and picking up the telephone. Moments later, the maid appeared at the doorway, cordless telephone in hand. Huffing and puffing, she handed the receiver to Madeline.

‘Hello,’ Madeline spoke brightly into the mouthpiece while darting an annoyed look at Ayu. The maid ignored her, turning around and shuffling back downstairs to continue mopping the kitchen floor.

‘Hi mum, it’s Justin.’

‘Justin!’ Madeline exclaimed. He was her youngest son, and although she would never admit it, her favourite. He was calling from Sydney, where he was now a successful lawyer. This made Madeline proud, although she still wished that he had come home to start a family, like his brothers.

‘How was church?’ Justin asked.

‘Good, good. Reverend Goh gave a very interesting sermon about the meek inheriting the earth. Reminded me of our humble beginnings, you know,’ Madeline replied.

‘But mum, when have you ever been meek?’ Justin asked, laughing.

‘Aiya! Why you always tease your mother like that? You have no idea, we came from nothing. Papa and I worked our fingers to the bone to give you boys the opportunities we never had,’ Madeline replied, feigning annoyance.

‘How could I not know, you’re always reminding us!’ Justin replied, laughing even harder.

‘It’s true, mah! Even when you boys were in Sydney, I still slogged for you! Remember when I visited, and you brought your friends home from uni? They were shocked to find your mother on her knees scrubbing the floor! I’ll never forget the look on Benji Koh’s face. I’ve known that boy since he was a baby. First time he saw me doing housework in old clothes! He told his mum servants are so expensive over there, even Mrs Wong scrubs her own floors!’ Mother and son broke out in laughter at the shared memory.

‘Speaking of my brothers, how are they?’ Justin changed the topic. His tactic worked, as his mother gave him a lengthy update on Alvin’s financial worries and Michael’s latest success. Justin held the phone away from his ear, mentally preparing himself for what he was about to say.

‘Justin, are you there?’ Madeline’s voice brought Justin back to reality.

‘Mum, I have something important to tell you,’ he said, clearing his throat.

‘What is it, son?’ Madeline asked, noticing the sudden change in his voice. Perhaps he had finally met someone. If so, Madeline hoped that she was a nice Chinese girl from a good Christian family.

‘Er, let’s go on FaceTime so we can see each other,’ he suggested. He sounded so strange that Madeline feared he was in some sort of trouble. However, she dispelled the silly notion as soon as it entered her mind. Her Justin would never get himself in trouble.

‘Just tell me, son,’ she said. If Justin had chosen an unsuitable girl, Madeline did not want to meet her on a video call, where it would be impossible to hide her disapproval.

‘OK. But first, I want you to know that I love you and dad very much,’ he replied.

‘I know, and I thank the Lord for you every day,’ Madeline replied, becoming impatient. It was not like Justin to dither this way.

‘Mum, I need to come out to you,’ Justin finally said, squeezing the words out.

‘Ha? Come out from where? We never held you back!’ Madeline retorted. The longer Justin lived abroad, the more foreign he sounded, reminding her painfully of the physical distance between them.

‘No, I mean, I want you to know that I’m gay,’ he said.

This time, Madeline understood exactly what her son had said. She had read about such things happening in Western countries, but she could find no words in reply.

‘Mum?’ Justin spoke after a moment’s hesitation.

‘Why are you talking rubbish?’ Madeline asked, hoping that Justin would laughingly apologise for making a bad joke.

‘It’s not rubbish, mum. It’s who I am. I’ve known this all my life.’

‘I see,’ Madeline replied.

Once the first few words had come out of Justin’s mouth, it seemed like he would never stop talking. While Madeline listened in stunned silence, he confessed that Robbie, the sporty flatmate whom he had brought home for Christmas, was actually his boyfriend.

‘We have been partners for three years,’ was how he put it. This sounded ridiculous to Madeline, as if they were colleagues at Justin’s law firm. Remembering how she had put them up in the self-contained unit at the back of the house to give them maximum privacy, she felt like a fool. How could she not have guessed? Her mind raced back to the times when the two young men had drawn many admiring looks as they swam together at the Tenangan Country Club, all tanned and athletic as they towelled off poolside before joining the rest of the family for iced lemon tea and club sandwiches on the patio overlooking the pool. Even then, she had thought that their swim shorts, with matching Hawaiian prints, were a little too tight for a town like Tenangan, but she had known better than to say anything to Justin, for fear of being labelled old fashioned. Besides, she had been so proud of her handsome, brilliant son, who mingled so effortlessly with his fair skinned friend. How vain, how utterly foolish she had been! To be fair, neither of the young men had the telltale flapping wrists and high pitched voices that she had long recognised in the local grocer’s unmarried middle-aged son, or the bank teller who helped to organise her monthly foreign transactions.

Had anyone in town realised that her son and the foreigner were more than flatmates? Her mind started racing furiously, recalling the many public outings that the family had made during those two weeks. People in Tenangan made it their business to know everyone else’s business, and the Wong family were well known within the community. If word got out that they had a gay son, salacious whispers would follow them wherever they went. Visions of her son having sex with his flatmate clouded Madeline’s mind, making her nauseous. Who was the man, and who was the woman? Even as she tried but failed to block the sickening visuals flooding her imagination, she recognised a fervent wish deep within herself, that her Justin was always the man.

‘Mum? Are you OK?’ Justin’s tremulous voice over the telephone shook Madeline out of her nightmarish reverie. She wished that she could cry or scream at him, but she could not even summon the energy to do so. Realising that she had been holding her breath, she exhaled sharply and looked down to find her smock drenched in sweat.

‘Son, are you trying to kill me?’ she asked melodramatically. It felt like the right thing to say in the circumstances.

‘What? Of course not! As I told you, this is how I’ve always been, mum. It’s time you knew me for who I really am,’ Justin replied, his voice rising a little.

‘I don’t think you know what you’re doing,’ Madeline insisted.

‘I know exactly what I’m doing, mother. As I said, I’ve known this all my life,’ Justin replied. He only called her mother when they were having an argument.

‘What about your heritage, son? Just because you’re living in the West, never forget you are Chinese!’

‘What does that have to do with anything, mum? You’re the one who converted to Christianity, turning your back on two thousand years of Chinese history!’ Justin retorted.

‘I can never tell you anything anymore, you always back me into a corner with your clever tongue,’ Madeline complained.

‘I don’t want to argue, mum. I just want you to accept me for who I am,’ Justin replied, expelling an audible sigh over the telephone line.

‘OK, fine! Just don’t tell your father,’ Madeline said, slumping her shoulders in resignation. Unlike herself, Ah Kau had never been careful with his health. Decades of business dinners and a taste for fine Scotch whiskey had left him with a pot belly, high blood pressure and fatty liver disease. She feared that the shock would kill him or even worse, give him a stroke, creating another problem she did not need.

‘Don’t worry, I won’t tell dad. I wanted to tell you first,’ Justin replied, sounding relieved. It had always been this way. Her sons only ever confessed their secrets to her, leaving it up to her to tell their father at an appropriate moment, or not at all.

‘I must go now, son,’ she said.

‘OK, speak soon,’ Justin replied, but the line had already gone dead while he was mid-sentence.

Long after hanging up on Justin, Madeline remained slumped in her chair, the telephone receiver still in her hand. Thoughts raced through her mind, but for once, she did not know what to do. Through the struggles of her early years, she had always found a way forward. Remembering how she had longed for a daughter when Justin was born, she wondered if she had somehow transmitted this desire to him, the little boy who had grown up following her every move. Madeline had no idea how long she remained in that position, but after a while, she heard Ah Kau moving about downstairs. He was home from his golfing session.

‘Wah, why you sit in the dark like that? Tired ah?’ he asked his wife, coming upstairs and popping his head into the bedroom.

‘Headache,’ Madeline replied listlessly. It was true. Her temples were throbbing painfully.

‘Oh. So you cannot go to Siew Lee’s party?’ Ah Kau cast an uncertain glance at his wife. It was no secret that she did not enjoy gatherings with Ah Kau’s extended family, but this was his niece’s eighteenth birthday. All his siblings, their spouses and their children would also be there.

‘No, no, of course we must go!’ Madeline replied. As much as she dreaded it, she knew that missing the party would be akin to a declaration of war with her in-laws.

‘Then better get ready. Late already!’ Ah Kau said, stepping past his wife on the way to the bathroom.

Madeline cast her eyes towards the clock on the wall. The hour hand had just touched six. Somehow, she managed to haul herself out of her chair. Opening a drawer at her dressing table, she found a box of aspirin, and quickly dissolved two tablets in a glass of water. Downing the solution in one gulp, she chose a pale cream outfit from her closet that was suitably dignified but not too expensive looking. She did not want Ah Kau’s siblings to think that she was showing off exactly how much higher they had climbed than the rest of his family.

When Ah Kau had finished with the shower, she stepped in and rinsed herself up to her neck, careful to avoid splashing her face with the warm, soapy water. She had set the water temperature higher than usual, and enjoyed the powerful jets soothing her weary body, but there was no time to linger. Quickly drying herself off afterwards, she slipped the dress on and spent a few minutes expertly refreshing her hair and makeup before telling Ah Kau that she was ready. Ah Kau summoned Jacob to drive them across town to his youngest brother’s house, in the outlying area where all his siblings had settled.

‘Where’s the cake?’ Ah Kau asked Madeline as they were stepping into the car.

‘Oh, I nearly forgot!’ Madeline exclaimed. ‘Ayu! Bring me the cake from the fridge! Quickly!’

Ayu raced into the kitchen and emerged with an enormous black forest cake. Madeline had ordered it from Blossom Bakery weeks ago, and they had picked it up on the way home from yum cha earlier that day.

During the drive, Ah Kau started telling Madeline about a business venture that his golf companions were looking into. He thought they should consider investing in it as well. Talk of investment opportunities normally piqued Madeline’s interest, but she barely registered what her husband was saying as he droned on. Ah Kau either did not notice her mood or chose to ignore it. He was looking forward to seeing his siblings. Opportunities to do so seemed to have dwindled over the years, even though they all lived in the same town.

After driving past row upon row of depressingly similar terraced houses, they arrived at their destination. The small house was already overflowing with members of the Wong clan. Several generations of Madeline’s in-laws spilled out from the living room onto the front porch, bearing plastic plates stacked high with food. Most of the women were dressed for the occasion, wearing pretty dresses and perhaps a splash of lipstick, but some of the men were in the same clothes they wore every day. No one was done up like Madeline or Ah Kau, in his pressed batik shirt and formal pants. Ah Kau’s brother Ah Ming, the proud father of the birthday girl, had parked his Proton hatchback on the green verge outside his home, so that the covered car space in front of the house could accommodate more folding tables and chairs for the party. A few heads turned in their direction as Jacob stopped the Mercedes outside the gates, while others pointedly ignored the new arrivals.

Greeting everyone brightly as she stepped out of the car ahead of Ah Kau, Madeline quickly located Siew Lee standing beside her mother. She handed the cake ceremoniously to the mother and slipped an ang pow with three hundred ringgits into the birthday girl’s hand. Siew Lee weighed the envelope in the palm of her hand for the briefest moment before thanking her aunt graciously, while her mother looked on approvingly.

Madeline somehow managed to hold herself together for the next few hours, smiling and answering questions about her sons, while remembering to compliment the food and the achievements of her in-laws’ children. Along with the current political climate, a favourite topic of conversation among Ah Kau’s siblings was comparing their children’s academic achievements. Most were straight A students, and those who had missed an A or two would be openly chided by their parents for failing to achieve the same grades as their cousins. While the older cousins did their parents proud by competing fiercely against each other, the younger generation increasingly rebelled against this parental pressure by simply ignoring it. During family gatherings like this, they huddled together to play video games in a separate room, away from the oppressive gaze of the adults. Because Madeline’s sons had grown up in a different part of town and attended different schools from their cousins, they were spared such pointless petty rivalries, but they had also missed out on the easy camaraderie that their cousins enjoyed with each other. Madeline knew that this made Ah Kau sad.

When it became clear that everyone was determined to stay on at the party late into the night, she discreetly whispered to Ah Kau that her headache was getting worse. He reluctantly agreed to call Jacob to drive them home. He had been enjoying himself thoroughly, but knew better than to argue with his wife or dare to send her home alone.

When Jacob arrived, they were still saying their goodbyes. Madeline waited patiently by Ah Kau’s side while he took an eternity to farewell each and every one of his seven siblings. She did not want to look like she was rushing him away. When they had driven off, she finally let her guard down, closing her eyes and laying her head back against the seat. Ah Kau asked how she was feeling, but she irritably gestured for him to be quiet and turned away from him. There was no need to pretend in front of Jacob. He had been the family’s driver for years, and she knew that he would never gossip about them. Ah Kau was not unduly bothered by his wife’s mood. He had seen it so many times over the years. He closed his own eyes and quickly drifted off for the rest of the short ride home. He had shared quite a few whiskeys with his brothers, his tummy was full, and he was content. Hearing her husband’s gentle snoring, Madeline opened her eyes and stared out the window, lost in thought.

By now, her in-laws would be comprehensively critiquing everything about herself