A thousand kings

By Tapiwa Zvakavapano

Explore the fictional world that arises from the day to day strangeness of life in Zimbabwe. A thousand kings is a collection of edgy modernist short stories by Tapiwa Zvakavapano,a Lemba Jew of Zimbabwe. The stories, while reminiscent of Latin American magic a, Kafkaesque futility, and Chekhovian characterization, are Zvakavapano's awakening and d

• Language: English
• Publisher: Street to Street Epic Publications
• Release date: Jan 6, 2015
• ISBN: 9781938609329

Book preview

The things

There are things that rustle in the middle of the night.

You hear them moving under your bed and, once in a while, even on top of your blankets. If you are the stupid type who do not like to sleep under blankets, or yet, if you are just too tall for your blankets, they may eat your toes.

Some of the idiots who claim to know everything will try to convince you that the things that rustle in the middle of the night are rats.

Don’t let them fool you!

They are not witches, are they, who know what goes rustling at night?

In any case, only a very hungry rat would be brave enough to eat your smelly toes.

***

There are also things that light your path on moonless nights, when you are walking your girlfriend towards her village and, perhaps, thinking about doing things along the way.

They appear to you as if it is only someone who is striking a flaming piece of wood into the ground, with the resultant ambers flying into the sky like fireworks.

People may try to convince you that it is your friend who has an eye on your girlfriend who is trying to scare you out of walking her towards her village and doing things along the way.

Again, let me warn you.

It is not wise to walk your girlfriend, when it is dark, towards her village with the idea of doing things along the way.

A friend of mine tried it once after a funeral.

He got one hell of a bang and swore never to see the girl again. Not in this life anyway.

Never mind doing something to her along the way…

***

There are things that zoom over your house when it is dark.

You may try to persuade yourself that these are airplanes carrying some rich bastards high in the sky.

Don’t fool yourself.

Not all the things that fly over your house at night are airplanes. In fact, most of them are not airplanes.

And they certainly are not birds.

Birds do not fly around at night do they? Birds most certainly have no business flying at night. If there is any bird that flies at night, then, there is something wrong with it.

***

There are things that call your name when it is dark and you are in the comfort of your blankets.

Never answer!

Even if they sound like your mother or brother or wife or whoever- never answer. The things of this world must remain in this world and those on the other side have no business being in this world.

So, what is your mother doing calling your name in the middle of the night when she has been dead and rotting in the ground for all these years?

The dead should most definitely stay dead and your long departed mother has no business calling your name at night.

And why does your brother, wife or whoever call your name at night when you never had a brother, wife or whoever in the first place?

***

There are other things that slither along the path when you are walking home from wherever in the dark.

You may try to convince yourself that these are lizards.

Don’t!

Lizards do not use paths like humans. Or if they do, they certainly do not use human paths. They, without a doubt, have no business using human paths.

If they were stupid enough to use paths like people, they would unquestionably invent their own!

Lizards are not stupid.

They do not follow somebody else’s trail like human beings.

They climb walls and I have never seen a path on a brick wall.

***

And there are things that grab your feet while you are trying to cross the river at night.

Don’t fool yourself.

They are not fish.

Even if you had some biblical curse trailing you — get real!

There are no fish big enough to swallow human beings in these rivers.

***

The things that rustle in the middle of the night;

That light your path in the dark;

That zoom over your house in the dead of the night;

That call your name when it is dark and you are in the comfort of your blankets;

That slither along the path when you are walking home from wherever in the middle of the night;

Look out for those things.

They move in broad daylight and do not even try to disguise themselves.

They walk, talk and eat just like you. But you never know what they are thinking.

They may even be your friends today. But tomorrow they will turn against you. They will try to force you to think as they do. To eat what they eat, drink what they drink, sing their songs and dance to their tune.

Beware of those things

And remember….

The things that are in your heart are in a deep cave. They may do whatever they want, but if you don’t open it to them, they will never get to the core of your being.

Just ask the devil for my address

Two long lost friends walking home from work towards evening meet in the middle of a traffic lights controlled intersection.

They are going in opposite directions and are both trying to beat the signals, which are green now, but could turn red at any moment.

The two shake hands in the middle of the road and step to the side to allow other pedestrians to go by.

So, what have you been doing with your life? one of them asks, eyes darting to the still green lights.

Chasing the wind my friend, replies the other, also casting eyes to his side of the journey, chasing the wind. And you?

I have been going around in circles my dear friend. But it has been long hasn’t it?

Years and years I would say, replies the other man, I would say more than ten years...

Yes, more than ten years. I never thought I would meet you again. It has been long . . .

By now both friends’ eyes are darting with increasing urgency towards the traffic lights.

At this very moment, the signals turn amber, and it is time to go.

Maybe, we will meet again, one says, proffering his hand.

Yes; maybe we will meet again, the other says, taking the offered hand. He does not sound convinced.

For a moment, it looks as if he may just cross the road to the side where his long lost best friend is going in order to prolong the chat.

However, with the vehicles besides them now beginning to move, the two quickly cut short the handshake and rush in different directions.

They stop on opposite walkways, from where they look wistfully at each other.

Anyway, one of them shouts, if we do not meet again in this life we will certainly meet in hell. Just ask the devil for my address and . . .

A haulage truck passing by cuts off the rest of what the man is saying, and his long lost friend waves from across the road before turning and going where he is going with a long sigh and a longing glance cast backwards.

What do they say you did?

The man is being led, handcuffed, along First Street. From the look of him, he has already received a heavy beating.

There is a policeman walking behind him, with a large and growing crowd trailing the detective.

The people are cheering and being led by several street kids.

As they turn into a street leading towards Charge Office, a distinguished looking man stops the procession by stepping in front of the handcuffed man, who has snot flowing down the nose and into the mouth.

What is happening here? demands the distinguished looking man who seemingly has appeared from nowhere.

No one bothers to question his audacity at stopping, not only the large crowd, but also the policeman who is in the process of taking the handcuffed man towards Charge Office.

Even the detective himself does not seem to mind. He grabs the handcuffed man by the belt and stops to compete with all the