Sozo

By TL VD

Like rainbow colors from the ammolite stone, the ladies of SOZO each bring a uniqueness to the four-way friendship. Camp P.E.A.R.L., the genesis of their friendship, was designed to equip teen girls to manage and heal from neglect, abuse, and other traumatic experiences.

Stained by childhood trauma with the affects continuing to rear its head in their adult lives, they learn to cope. Through camp, they were exposed to a variety of therapeutic practices and tools. Although they have evolved, the evidence of the broken young girls they once were still lurks in the shadows, proving that, in some cases, healing can be a lifelong process.
After 20+ years of support, acceptance, and at times, codependency, these girls become women who discover that their sisterhood is the greatest tool of all. This rare and colorful friendship allows them to draw inspiration and the will to live through life’s darkest moments. Journey with the authors of SOZO through the lives of Amelia, Janeesha, Priscilla, and Shay.

• Language: English
• Publisher: TL VD
• Release date: Feb 21, 2021
• ISBN: 9781005009502

Book preview

Camp P.E.A.R.L.

(Chapter 1)

Are you suffering from low self-esteem? Is your sexual activity out of control? Is there a lot of drama in your life? Are you in need of restoration and love? Well, you’re not alone. Come spend the summer with us at Camp P. E. A. R. L., where healing begins. That’s what the camp postcard read.

Camp P. E. A. R. L’s goal was to provide Purposeful Experiences to Affirm and Reclaim Lives. The camp sat on ten acres of land and was surrounded by too many trees to count. It included three living quarters, which slept twenty each; sixteen campers and four camp counselors (CC). The administrative building was where you registered, ate, had group workshops, and spent recreational time. There were also trampolines and swings for physical exercise on the grounds. This was a major part of detoxing for the girls with addiction issues. In addition, there were horses, other farm animals, and a beautiful, serene lake. The aerial view of the camp looked like a smiling young girl with afro puffs.

It was arrival day. Camp P. E. A. R. L. was opening its doors for its 25th summer. They had spent the last 24 summers helping young ladies on their path to healing from trauma. Their success rate was phenomenal. Many of the young ladies who had graduated from the program came back to help once they became of age. This year would be no different. The counselors were running around like chickens with their heads cut off, trying to make sure that everything was in place, impatiently awaiting the arrival of their guests. 

As Janeesha, an attractive, bi-racial high schooler with an athletic build, watched her fellow campers pile onto the bus, the more intrusive her thoughts became about the many reasons they were there. When she asked her mom the reason for signing her up, her mom started to journey into a matrix that Janeesha did not want to enter. Then again, with her mom, she found it smarter to just nod, and go with the flow. The final count: over thirty-five girls on the bus. The bus was quiet except for one girl sitting in front of Janeesha. She talked almost the entire time. Glad she ain’t sitting next to me, Janeesha thought.

The bus came to a slow halt. A young lady sitting towards the front of the bus suddenly stood. She turned to the rest of the passengers and said, Hello ladies, welcome to Camp P. E. A. R. L! I’m Counselor Marie. As the bus comes to a complete stop, check your camp arrival letters and locate the precious stone found on the bottom. As you depart the bus, your assigned camp counselor will be wearing a t-shirt with that specific stone on the front and back. Join her and she will provide you with your room assignments and explain how you will spend your first night. Alrighty, any questions? 

The silence was awkward. From the array of looks on everyone’s face there were questions, but not one peep was spoken. There was pure silence, even Miss chatterbox's jaws were locked tight. Everyone sat there, either grinning or staring out the window. Janeesha visualized speech bubbles above each girl’s head.

Precious stones? What are we, babies or something? thought the girl with the poufy brown hair.

Has she been on this bus the entire trip? the girl with the thick-rimmed glasses was thinking.

I’m hungry, thought the girl with the freckles, as she pressed her head against the seat in front of her, cradling her tummy.

Damn...woods, a lake, all girls, this is the life, another camper thought.

Now, said the young lady, interrupting Janeesha’s mind reading exercise, Let’s get excited about those precious stones, and prepare to exit the bus safely, one girl at a time. The girls stood simultaneously to exit the bus.

Hey, my name is Shay, said the scrawny red-headed white girl standing behind Janeesha. Are you always this quiet?

Nope. Janeesha replied. Nope, not always quiet. Just organizing my thoughts, that’s all. I’m Janeesha. 

Nice to meet you, Janeesha, said Shay. So, what brings you here?

My mom needs to feel like she accomplished something and my dad needs to do something with his money, Janeesha replied.

It can’t be that bad, Shay chuckled.

For real, I just don’t like the outdoors. I’ll be happy when it’s over, Janeesha said.

Here we go, Shay said, looking at her letter. I didn’t know stones could be rainbow colored. Am-mo-lite stone, what’s that? she asked with a giggle. Let me see yours. Instantly, Janeesha regretted every word she had shared with Shay.

Umm, ammolite it is, she said.

Shay didn’t take notice of Janeesha’s apprehension, instead, she smiled brightly.

This must be a sign or something, Shay said. We get to spend the whole summer together, Janeesha! 

Cool, yeah, Janeesha said, smirking, A sign or something. She rubbed bug spray on her face and arms. 

Once Janeesha and Shay got off the bus, they approached their group.

Hey girls, the counselor greeted. So, I’m sorry about all the standing around, but the others are still arriving. For those of you that are here, our rooms are in CLAM 2. Feel free to go in and hangout in the recreational area. As the other girls arrive, I will send them that way as well, then I will show you to your living quarters for the summer. Sound good? Great! The counselor instructed excitedly as the campers swatted mosquitoes.

Janeesha remembered the camp flyer her mother posted strategically on the fridge, so she would have to look at it every day. Although she had a strong disdain for the outdoors, Janeesha really didn’t have any feelings about the camp, only a twinge of excitement to get out of the house for the entire summer.

It had only been a few days since the campers arrived and settled into their living quarters. Everyone was getting acquainted with one another. Mostly, they were trying to grasp all of the instructions from the camp counselors (CC) and being away from their normal lives. Just like at any camp, in the beginning, everything seemed quiet and drama-free, but all that changed once everyone got comfortable. Then, the cat came clawing out the bag and the stank hit the fan, filling the air with an unbearable aroma at times.

After lunch, there was a yoga session for CLAM 3 (the Ruby Group) while the rest of the girls attended a group workshop or craft session. On this particular day, there was so much commotion in the yoga session. Priscilla, a plump Hispanic girl with long black hair, was refusing to do a yoga position. She yelled in Spanish at the top of her lungs. Counselor Rebecca ran over to the girl to help, but she ended up falling on her face. The collision between her face and the floor resulted in a blood spill. Counselor Rebecca jumped up, covered her nose with her hands, and with a disturbing limp, she rushed to the restroom. 

After the outburst, all of the girls had to meet with the camp director. They were frightened and relieved at the same time. They didn’t know what to expect from the semi-horrific incident, but they were also happy that they didn’t have to put their bodies through the torture of learning a new yoga position. The Camp Director, Mrs. Johnson, a tall, dark-haired, Amazon woman in denim shorts, a bright yellow shirt, and sandals stood in front of them. She spoke with concern and confidence. 

One of your Ruby mates is speaking with the healing director about her outburst today, Mrs. Johnson said. I need to know what happened. 

The room was quiet until one young lady spoke out. She timidly raised her hand and the director acknowledged her.  What’s your name, young lady? Mrs. Johnson asked. 

Amelia, the girl spoke. 

Okay, Amelia, why don’t you tell me what happened?

One of my Ruby mates started screaming. I turned quickly to see what was going on. I accidentally kicked my shoe from beside my mat and Counselor Rebecca tripped over it. It all happened so quickly, that I was afraid to say anything, Amelia said. 

I appreciate you being brave enough to tell the truth, Mrs. Johnson responded.

Amelia didn’t know if it was bravery or pure selfishness. What she did know was that if she hadn’t said anything, the girls in CLAM 3 would have made her summer more horrible than expected. She overheard their conversations during lights-out about the drama they were accustomed to at home, and she didn’t want any part of that.

When the injured camp counselor returned, she was at first embarrassed then irritated. I think they plotted against me! Counselor Rebecca suddenly exclaimed. I know they don’t like me, and I think they wanted to be sent home.

There was a rumble of disagreement from the group. It was true; the girls didn’t particularly like her. They felt they shouldn’t have had to take orders from her because she was only a few years older than them, but no one would intentionally hurt her.

The young counselor was adamant. Amelia was being very short-tempered with me during lunch, and the Hispanic girl had a smirk on her face in class the two of them were whispering in Spanish. Counselor Rebecca went on to say how distraught she was and threatened to report the incident to the police or the local news station. Mrs. Johnson assured Counselor Rebecca that after speaking with the girls individually, it was concluded that this had been a freak accident. They apologized and sent Counselor Rebecca home on a paid administrative leave. A decision was made that Amelia and a dramatic Priscilla would be moved from CLAM 3 to CLAM 2 under the supervision of a more experienced counselor. Word about the incident traveled through the camp so rapidly, that Mrs. Johnson made the girls call their parents. 

The girls gathered around Amelia and Priscilla to discuss what happened. Janeesha, no stranger to drama and the latest gossip, joined the group. Shay stood next to her watching as she made one hood gesture after the other, doing what she'd became known for: neck and eye rolls, finger popping, and high fives. Shay could hear her voice tower over the other girls. She thought to herself, I can't believe this is the same girl I met on the bus.

Big mouth, she murmured, staring at Janeesha. 

Since their arrival, the incident with Priscilla, Amelia, and the Counselor Rebecca had been the most exciting thing that had happened. Everything else seemed a bit somber. Most of the girls were finally starting to loosen up. The majority of them were from group homes, which made it a little easier for them to meet new people. It was somewhat of a sad norm for them. The bulk of them missed their families, resented being there, or just wanted to get back to a normal summer at home. Shay, however, missed her dog.

Amelia entered the room looking a bit timid. 

Umm... hello, she greeted. Is this bunk taken? She walked over to the lower bunk across from Shay.

Hi, Shay responded. It’s all yours! She’s pretty for a black girl, Shay thought to herself. 

Amelia settled in. She covered her bunk with an all-matching comforter, sheet, and pillow set that bared a daisy flower print. It actually brightened up the gloomy room. After completing the task at hand, she immediately covered herself from head to toe with the comforter. Suddenly, all Shay could hear was muffled crying and sniffling for what felt like time with no end. I feel sorry for her, she thought. At some point, she’s going to have to get up to go to the restroom or the mess hall. I’ll approach her then. Surely enough, Amelia eventually rose from under the comforter.

Hello, are you okay? Shay asked.

Amelia nodded her head and shrugged her shoulders, as if to say that she was just there. She glared at the wallet-sized photo in her hand. Shay wanted to ask her who was in the photo so badly but decided not to pry.

Are you sure you’re okay? Shay asked again with concern. 

No, I want to go home, Amelia’s voice cracked. Shay had opened the gate to her truth. 

Are you thirsty? I could walk with you to the mess hall to grab a drink, she offered.

Thanks, I could use a drink, Amelia replied. 

The two headed to the door. Shay grabbed her small duffle bag, which held some personal items (and what she later disclosed to the girls as juice bottles filled with vodka and cranberry juice from home.) Despite the distance between the CLAM 2 barracks and the mess hall, which was about three hundred yards, the two formed a bond in that short brisk walk.

It’s going to be a long summer, Shay said. We might as well make the best of it and have some fun. I have something in my bag that's going to help us to do just that.

Oh really, Amelia said, smiling. 

I don't know why you're here, Shay continued, but I know why I'm here and I had to find a way to cope with it as best I could. You know, girls can be catty. I can tell you right now, a few of them have probably been through far worse than you and I put together. Let’s just have each other’s back, okay?  

Amelia had been desperately longing for someone or something to fill her void as well, so she quickly agreed. The girls grabbed a drink and some fruit from the counter and headed back to the barrack. 

Upon re-entering the room, with a quick glance to the right, they found Priscilla manning the bunk above Amelia's.

Amelia quickly whispered to Shay, Oh snap, that's the girl that got in trouble with me.

Maybe you should go and talk to her, Shay replied.

Amelia agreed, Yeah, I guess I should. 

As she approached the bunk, she found Priscilla writing in her journal. This would become one of the many journals she would fill through the years, the pages graced with memories, thoughts, fears, and desires. 

What are you writing? Amelia asked, curiously.

Oh, I’m just writing down my thoughts. It helps me to get through tough times, Priscilla openly replied. 

Have you met Shay? Amelia asked. 

Pricilla looked in Shay’s direction.

She’s a really nice girl. Rumor has it, she can be a bit wild at times, Amelia looked at Shay and jokingly laughed. We’re meeting up later on tonight at the lake after dinner and Group. You down?" Amelia asked, giving Priscilla a reassuring look.

Totally, Priscilla eagerly replied. No one's been talking to me very much since I've been here, so yeah, I'm down with that. 

Amelia waved Shay over.

Shay, meet Priscilla, Amelia introduced.

Nice to meet you, Priscilla, Shay said, extending her hand.

I invited Priscilla to kick it with us at the lake tonight. Is that okay? Amelia asked.

Word! You coming? Shay questioned.

Yeah, I’ll go, Priscilla answered. 

Great! May I ask you something, Priscilla? I’m dying to know, said Shay. 

I guess so, Priscilla responded.

Are you Mexican or Puerto Rican? Shay ignorantly asked.

The correct term is Hispanic, Priscilla quickly informed.

I thought so, Shay mumbled. 

What does that mean? Priscilla asked.

Just curious. Are your parents immigrants, or are they US citizens? Shay continued probing.

No, my parents were deported, Priscilla said and burst into uncontrollable tears.

This was the first time the girls would experience one of Priscilla's many emotional breakdowns, regarding her parents and their deportation. 

Were they here illegally? Shay asked, oblivious to the pain it was causing. 

The disturb look on Priscilla’s face let Shay know this wasn’t something that she wanted to continue talking about.

Priscilla, please don't cry, Amelia interjected. Shay, why don’t you give it a break? You can see she doesn’t want to talk about it.

At that moment, the door flung open and Janeesha fell into the room. 

What’s going on in here? Janeesha asked with very little breath.

We got two new roomies, Shay said. She stood up and walked toward the door, extending her hand to Janeesha. I would like for you to meet Amelia and Priscilla; they were transferred from CLAM 3. 

Hey y’all! I hope y’all ain’t messy because I don’t have time, Janeesha laughed.

Janeesha, we’re gonna hang out at the lake later. You want to come? Shay as asked, sprawling out on the bottom bunk. 

Yeah, I’m down, but I have to take a nap first, Janeesha yawned. 

A nap sounds great, Amelia added. Let’s all take a nap. I'll set the alarm for an hour. When we wake up, it should be time for dinner and Group. After that, we can get together as we planned by the lake. The girls all agreed. 

The hour past swiftly and the alarm went off. Each of the girls woke up without hesitation. Shortly after, the CC announced that the food was ready in the mess hall. On the menu that night was spaghetti, garlic bread, salad, and a brownie with their choice of vanilla or chocolate ice cream for dessert.

Once the girls were finished with dinner, everyone gathered for Group. Amelia, Shay, and Priscilla sat next to each other. Janeesha entered minutes later and sat down next Shay. The topic of the night was: Building Self-Confidence. The CC’s shared their experiences and facilitated a small reflective writing exercise. All four girls quickly completed the assignment because as a rule, once they were done with the session, they were allowed free time. They could go to the recreation room or partake in any of the campground amenities, including the lake. They turned in their work and announced that they would be out by the lake. With the CC’s permission, they headed out. On the way there, Shay stopped by the CLAM 2 barracks to grab her duffel bag. She sprinted from the barracks to the lake without stopping. When she arrived at the lake, she was slightly out of breath.

Are you okay? Amelia asked with her eyes wide. What are you running from?

"Nothing, I just love to