THELU - The Lousy Undergrad at IIT

By Nutan Nomad

First things first… This book is not an Autobiography. I am not going to bore you with my life story. You can trust me on that and read on.

 

"Thelu" is an endeavor to present to you in English SP (SP - Slow Pace), the eccentric, idiotic, hilarious characters that were part of my stint as a "Thelu" and those notable and memorable events (be it funny, emotional, intense, whatever) associated with them. When I say 'event', it is not about someone jumping from the tenth floor and still surviving or the hero getting caught in the midst of a brutal riots. The events depicted here are the simple ones you would have witnessed and enjoyed in your own (college) life.

 

So, is this book for you?

 

If you have studied in a residential campus in any corner of the world, you can very well relate to this book. If you have not, still you can very well relate. If you have studied in a college, school or any such place, this book is for you. If you consider education only conditions brain, this book is for you as well.

Basically, this book is for everyone who can read and understand English SP.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Nutan Nomad
• Release date: Feb 17, 2021
• ISBN: 9781393606116

Book preview

KOLO

‘Kolo’ (in Hindi) literally means ‘Open’. This used to be the very first Institute slang that you encounter as a fresher. As soon as you hear a senior say, Kolo, you got to open everything irrespective of the place, time and mood. You have to open your mouth, open your heart, open your soul, ... Body? No, it is not that bad. You need not open your body.

The first few weeks of Kolo culminated in a Freshers’ Night. I wouldn’t say that it was a grand night, it was rather mediocre. During the Kolo period (or call it the ‘Ragging’ period if that sounds more adventurous), the seniors used to identify the worthy and talented freshers, and give them an opportunity to perform in the Freshers’ Night.

As the tradition suggests, we had our Fresher’s Night too. We had an early dinner and made our presence in the Lecture Hall Complex with great enthusiasm. The largest of the lecture halls, ‘L7’, was the chosen venue. There were absolutely no decorations. The scribbles and diagrams from that day’s Phy01 (Physics 101) class was still visible in the blackboard (It used to be Green in color actually). The green board was the backdrop of the stage where the worthy freshers were going to display their talents.

The show was in progress, freshers were performing, and it was hard for us to figure out if it was a dance, skit or mime. The seniors on the stage outnumbered the actual performers. Boys completed their programs within half an hour and the stage was open for the girls. A short and plump girl appeared on the stage, held the mic and started singing,

"Jab koi baat bigad jaaye, Jab koi mushkil pad jaaye,

Tum dena saath mera, o humnavaaz

......

Tum magar andhorein mein, naa chhodna mera haath"

She sang well. But, amidst the booing, she could complete only a part of the song and had to leave the stage with a frustrated face. There was an announcement made requesting the crowd to maintain silence, rather discipline. But, no soul in that hall was in a mood to heed to that.

After a few minutes of no action on the stage, few fresher girls started with something like a dance and a whole lot of seniors entered the stage to cheer them up. They surrounded the girls completely and it was more of a jeering than cheering. The night was in full swing and suddenly the lights went off.

Yes, suddenly the lights went off...

THELU???

First things first... This book is not an Autobiography. I am not going to bore you with my life story. You can trust me on that and read on.

Thelu is an endeavor to present to you in English SP (SP - Slow Pace), the eccentric, idiotic, hilarious characters that were part of my stint as a Thelu and those notable and memorable events (be it funny, emotional, intense, whatever) associated with them. When I say ‘event’, it is not about someone jumping from the tenth floor and still surviving or the hero getting caught in the midst of a brutal riots. The events depicted here are the simple ones you would have witnessed and enjoyed in your own (college) life.

When these events started happening Aishwarya Rai was still a not so well known model, SRK had just come out of TV,  Sachin had just met Anjali and was in a courtship, ‘Roja’ was yet to be made (means Rahman was still composing only jingles for adverts), Sri Lanka was still a minnow in the world of cricket, Doordarshan was the only available TV channel and yes, Babri Masjid was still intact.

This book is dedicated to all those Thelus of the world.

So, is this book for you?

If you have studied in a residential campus in any corner of the world, you can very well relate to this book. If you have not, still you can very well relate. If you have studied in a college, school or any such place, this book is for you. If you consider education only conditions brain, this book is for you as well.

Basically, this book is for everyone who can read and understand English SP.

SWIMMING POOL

When I entered Cykar’s room, he was busy making his energy drink. If I tell you the ingredients of the drink you would become more curious, surprised or just run to the bathroom... yes, you may even feel like vomiting. Cykar was dressed in a black color full trouser, a full sleeved white shirt that was neatly tucked in and a black shiny tie around his neck.

It was a lazy Saturday early morning 11 AM. I was still in my colorless, collar-less, torn T-shirt and lungi (sarong). It is the A-Top block of the Hall (Hostel) 1. The hostel had 6 wings (A to F) and three floors (Bot, Mid and Top) in each wing. Cykar had taken a room in Top wing next to the bathroom. You may wonder what Cykar was doing in such formal attire on a Saturday morning. Well, he was about to attend one of those campus interviews.

It was the campus interview time of the semester and booze parties were a common scene in Hall 1. Placement, GRE, Schol (Scolarships in US universities), Reco (Recommendation Letters from the Profs for applying to those US Universities) etc. used to be the prime talk of the Hostel. I was, however, from a  different league. Anyways, booze overflowed, yet booze was never enough. People drank like fish. Anyone walking alongside any room, where the occupant had landed a job offer (or two sometimes) or a schol, had to just walk in and pick up a glass. Guaranteed booze of varieties. Tharin once said, more the booze, better for health as Alcohol Kills Bacteria.

Cykar was leaning on the wall and sipping his drink. The guitarist poster that we made for the previous Galaxy was adorning a side of the wall. Under the dimly lit yellow bulb, the poster looked shiny. It was made by merging three black colored chart papers. Fluorescent Orange and Green color ribbons were used