Emotional Intelligence In The Life of Muhammad: An illustration of how being Emotionally Intelligent contributed to the successful creation of a nation.

By Farhan Al Bastaki

We all know people who have more of an impact on others in their surroundings. They could be family members, friends, coworkers, business founders or politicians. They have a unique way of gaining the loyalty of others and bringing people together to achieve common goals. They are great listeners and know how to communicate in pushing others do to produce their best.

Such people have a higher degree of emotional intelligence, higher self awareness and know how to achieve maximum productivity and maximum results. Individuals like this also know how to achieve great results alone and with others as well.

This book was written with the intention to increase awareness on how emotional intelligence can affect positively your life and how it can enhance your effectiveness across all aspects of your life.

By gaining access to top tier emotional intelligence knowledge, you will be able to understand its effects and how it can be used in your life today. Personally, socially or professionally - this book will help you improve your life today and help you create a better future tomorrow.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Lulu.com
• Release date: May 21, 2020
• ISBN: 9781716910074

Book preview

Emotional Intelligence in the Life of Muhammad

Illustration of how being emotionally intelligent contributed to the successful creation of a nation.

Farhan Al Bastaki

© 2018 Dr. Farhan Al Bastaki. All rights reserved.

No part of this Book may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including but not limited to: photocopying, recording, or by any information storage retrieval system without the written permission of the publisher, except for the inclusion of brief quotations in a review.

Graphic Design: Kendra Cagle (5LakesDesign.com) ISBN: 978-9948-38-326-0

Farhan Al Bastaki

P.O.Box 10545

Dubai UAE

www.eiitlom.com

[e-mail]

Facebook: @eiitlom

Instagram: @eiitlom

Table of Contents

INTRODUCTION

The idea of this book

Why this book?

The structure of the book

Emotional Intelligence explained

Who is Muhammad?

Chapter 1. BEFORE ISLAM

Makkah becomes a town.

Allah tests Abraham and Ismail.

Muhammad’s birth and life before prophecy

Muhammad’s first political influence

Makkah’s belief

Chapter 2. MUHAMMAD IN MAKKAH

The first revelation from Allah

Gabriel visits Muhammad again.

The skies protect the message.

Inviting the closest and most trustworthy

The public announcement of the message

Denying and fighting the message

The fourth year of Revelation, and the start of opposition

Abu Baker takes a beating for Muhammad.

The first martyr

The freeing of the slaves

Makkah’s leaders sneak to listen to the Quran.

The first Hijrah (Immigration)

All of Makkah bows at once.

The Quraish try to return the people who left for Abyssinia.

The Quraish negotiate with Abu Talib to surrender or stop Muhammad.

Hamza accepts Islam.

Omar accepts the Message.

The Christians of Najran

Makkah’s negotiation with Muhammad

The general boycotting of Muhammad and Banu Hashim

The Quraish hold people back from listening to Muhammad.

The Roman–Persian war

The year of sadness

The trip to Al Taif

The nine Jin listen to Muhammad.

Esra and Meraj, Muhammad’s night trip from Makkah to Jerusalem, and from there to meet his Lord Above

All Heavens

The Hijrah (Migration) to Madinah

Plans to move out of Makkah, and the allegiance of

Al Aqabah

Chapter 3. THE HIJRAH (MIGRATION) TO MADINAH

The Quraish meet to decide.

Muhammad leaves home.

Muhammad, the Truth Teller and the Trustworthy

The way to Madinah

The first Friday prayer

Muhammad arrives in Madinah.

The construction of the Mosque

Islam in Madinah

The brothering between the Muhajireen and the Ansar

The calling to prayer

The forming of the nation

The redirection of Qibla

Chapter 4. ATTACKS ON AND IN MADINAH

The battle of Badr (The first war between Muslims)

The Quraishi army is divided.

The battle of Badr starts.

The Quraish receive news of the defeat.

Madinah receives news of the victory

Bani Qainuqa’a leave Madinah.

The second major battle between the two nations (The battle of Uhud)

The battle begins.

The death of Hamza

Bani Al Nadheer leave Madinah.

The battle of Al Ahzab/Al Khandaq (The Trench)

Bani Quraidah leave Madinah.

Chapter 5. OTHER ATTEMPTS TO KILL MUHAMMAD

Effk’s slander

Chapter 6. THE PEACE TREATY

The Hudaibiyah peace treaty

The first year after the signing of the peace treaty

Muhammad and the Muslims perform Umrah.

Three fine men of the Quraish embrace Islam.

Amr bin Alas

Khalid bin Al Waleed

Chapter 7. THE CALLING OF THE KINGS AND KNIGHTS TO ISLAM

The letter to Caesar of Rome

The letter to Al Muqawqis, king of Egypt

The letter to Khosrau of Persia

The letter to the kingdom of Bahrain

The letter to Oman

Chapter 8. TWO MAJOR BATTLES

The battle of Khaybar

The other three castles

The arrival of Jafar bin Abi Talib from Abyssinia

The poisoned goat

The town of Fadak

Wadi Al Qira

The battle of Mu’ta

Chapter 9. ISLAM GOES BACK TO MAKKAH

Fateh Makkah (Islam enters Makkah.)

Muhammad enters Makkah and the Forbidden House.

The second day in Makkah

Chapter 10. THE YEAR BEFORE THE LAST

After Makkah

The battle of Hunain/Hawazin

Al Ansar’s sadness at missing out on the spoils of the battle

Abu Baker leads the Haj

Chapter 11. THE FAREWELL

The farewell Haj

Back to Madinah, and the final days

The final day

ABOUT THE AUTHOR

REFERENCES

Introduction

Muhammad¹, son of Abdullah, son of Abd Al Muttalib, was one of the most influential people who have ever lived amongst us, and one of the people who brought great improvement to the lives of millions of people. He is believed to have been God’s last messenger and Prophet to the words.

History, both ancient and recent, has many examples of such people who have their own magical way of making people gather around them and follow them. For a long time this unique ability was attributed to charisma, the ability to have such influence on others being considered a God-given gift, and it was assumed that the ones who have charisma are just the lucky ones amongst us.

Today the science of Emotional Intelligence has been developed, and the power that the idols of the past and present possessed can now be identified, and even better, it can be learned. Real-life examples show us that those people who are successful in leading a group towards a common goal are not necessarily the most intellectually intelligent members of their group – there may well be many members of their group who are far more intelligent than them in different specialties – but these leaders have the ability to put the sum of all those talents into a unified force to reach the goals of the team.

THE IDEA OF THIS BOOK

I have always had an interest in history, particularly the era of the birth of Islam in 610 A.C. and the first century following that, referred to by Islamic historians as the Golden Era. There are many reasons for this interest, the main one being the huge change that century brought in the life of Arabs initially, and in most of the world eventually. This era is filled with many examples of people who have shown clear signs of how Emotionally

Intelligent they were, and how they influenced their own lives and the lives of those around them.

Another interest I have always had is the topic of Personal Development. This interest led me to enroll in the Mohammed Bin Rashid Center for Leadership Development, a center established by H. H. Sheikh Mohammed Bin Rashid Al Maktoum, vice president and prime minister of the United Arab Emirates, and ruler of Dubai. Himself one of the most influential and successful leaders of our time, he established this center for the purpose of developing future leaders in the UAE, and it is that same interest that leads to my preferred readings and personal development courses being on topics such as Leadership, Effectiveness, Team Building, Process Planning, and Emotional Intelligence.

While reading books about Emotional Intelligence and attending training courses about it, I noticed that glimpses of the lives of Muhammad and his friends and immediate followers would come up in my mind that demonstrate how Emotionally Intelligent they were, and how this helped lay the foundation for the huge success in building the Islamic nation out of the scattered tribes that had lived for centuries un-united before the birth of Islam.

WHY THIS BOOK?

Emotional Intelligence is a relatively new science, and one that is still in the stages of early recognition – and like any of the human sciences, the more evidence there is of how effective it is, across nationalities and ages and beliefs, the more recognized the science becomes and the more valid its tools, leading to more people studying it and using it in their lives.

This book was therefore written with the intention of increasing awareness of Emotional Intelligence and how it can enhance people’s effectiveness in all aspects of their lives through all of their tasks and roles.

THE STRUCTURE OF THE BOOK

In choosing how to structure this book, I chose the layout of a story telling the lives of Muhammad and the people around him, from Muhammad’s birth until shortly after his death, making reference to the events in his life where his Emotional Intelligence and that of people around him were evidenced, and how these interactions led to successful outcomes.

A storytelling format was also chosen because I believe it will make reading the book more interesting, and more importantly more relevant to the understanding of the whole picture and the reasoning for each action, and to the link between the incidents and the chosen reactions to them, so making the knowledge clearer and more valuable.

It is important to mention here that Allah, the God of Muslims, is the same God referred to in Christianity as The Father. We will be mentioning the link between the three Heavenly religions later in the book – Islam, Christianity, and Judaism – and it is important to make these links clear to the readers to allow them to see the whole picture of the life of Muhammad.

As this book is about Emotional Intelligence in the life of Muhammad, it is very important to give a brief explanation of what Emotional Intelligence is, and what skills it gets divided into, so you as a reader can relate to these skills while going through the story. I have chosen one of the best books about Emotional Intelligence and one of the most straightforward ones out there, Emotional Intelligence 2.0 by Travis Bradberry and Jean Greaves, and this will be briefly introduced before starting the story of the life of Muhammad.

Where verses of the Quran are referred to, the translation into English was done using my own translation after referring to more than one trusted source of Quran explanatory books, rather than quoting existing English translations of the Quran. I chose this method to ensure that the translation is framed in the simplest language to ease its understanding.

EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE EXPLAINED

From reading various definitions of Emotional Intelligence, in simple English, Emotional Intelligence can be summed up as the ability of someone to identify his/her emotions, and those of others, to understand the sources of these emotions, and to make the best use of them to reach his/ her goals.

To further explain Emotional Intelligence, I will be borrowing the knowledge shared below from the Emotional Intelligence 2.0 by Travis Bradberry and Jean Greaves. Quoting from the book, Emotional Intelligence is your ability to recognize and understand emotions in others, and your ability to use this awareness to manage your behavior and relationships. Emotional Intelligence is the something in each of us that is a bit intangible. It affects how we manage behavior, navigate social complexities, and make personal decisions that achieve positive results.

Put simply, Emotional Intelligence is divided into two main facets, one (Personal Competence) that addresses the individual’s awareness of him/ herself and his/her use of Emotional Intelligence, and one (Social Competence) that addresses the individual’s awareness of the Emotions of everyone he/she interacts with, and how this awareness is used.

Each one of these facets is further divided into two main sub-facets. The Personal Competence side is divided into Self-Awareness and Self-Management, while the Social Competence side, which addresses one’s interactions with others, is subdivided into Social Awareness and Relationship Management.

A screenshot of a cell phone Description automatically generated

Self-Awareness is your ability to realize your emotions while you are feeling them, and to understand what triggers them and what leads up to them.

Self-Management is how you control your reactions in each situation to make sure the act is what will get you to your desired goal, rather than just the common reaction to the situation. Furthermore, your understanding of what leads to your emotions could help you to be in control of what emotional state you choose to be in prior to particular situations, to help you reach your desired goals.

Social Awareness, on the other hand, is your ability to recognize the feelings and emotions of the people you are interacting with; to know the reasons for what they are saying or doing, or not saying and doing.

Relationship Management is consequently the sum of all that has been mentioned above: your realisation of your Self-Awareness and ability to Self-Manage, added to your Social Awareness of the true emotions and motives of others, then using the sum of all these in managing to successfully handle your interaction with others with the aim of reaching your desired goals.

WHO IS MUHAMMAD?

Muhammad is believed to have been God’s last Prophet and Messenger to the worlds, and by him God has sealed the long list of many Prophets and Messengers whom he sent to guide people to him.

Muhammad is the son of Abdullah, son of Abdul Muttalib, descendant of Beny Hashim, one of the main wings of the Quraish tribe that lived in Makkah, the holy Islamic city in the current Kingdom of Saudi Arabia.

Muhammad’s ancestors, the Quraish, are the descendants of the Prophet Ismail, one of three sons of the Prophet Abraham, two of whom, Ismail and Isaac, were also prophets. The Prophet Isaac was the father of the Prophet Jacob, also known as Israel, and his twelve children, known as Beni Israel, meaning Sons of Israel, one of the twelve sons being the Prophet Joseph, who brought these people from the deserts of Seina into Egypt. From the descendants of the Prophet Jacob also came the Prophets Moses and Jesus, peace be upon them all.

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¹ There are numerous alternative spellings of the name Muhammad (Mohammad, Muhammed, Mohamed, Mohamad, etc.). Throughout this text the name is spelt Muhammad when it refers to Muhammad the Prophet.

Chapter 1.

Before Islam

The Prophet Abraham’s other son, Ismail, was brought to an empty valley in Arabia called Makkah soon after his birth, along with his mother Hajar. Abraham left his wife and newly born son in that empty valley with no source of water or trees, as it was an order from God, and he turned his back on them and started walking away. His wife, Hajar, called upon him and asked, Did Allah ask you to do this? meaning to leave them abandoned in this empty valley in the middle of nowhere, to which he replied Yes. The totally believing and devoted wife and new mother replied, Then Allah won’t let us down.

Abraham continued walking away and raised his hands towards the sky, and in his prayers he called God:

"And when Abraham said, My Lord, make this town a safe one and prevent me and my children from worshipping idols. My Lord, they (the idols) have misguided a lot of people, so those who follow me would be part of me, and those who disobey me, my Lord you are the Forgiving and the Merciful. Our Lord, I have settled my children in an uncultivable valley next to your forbidden and sacred house, our Lord, for them to establish the worship of prayer, and so cause the hearts of some people to be drawn towards them and grant them fruits of all sorts so they may be thankful. Our Lord, you know well all that we hide in ourselves by way of thoughts, and all that we declare, as nothing is hidden from Allah in the Earth and in the Heavens. Many thanks to Allah who, in spite of my old age, has gifted me Ishmael and Isaac. Indeed my Lord hears all prayers. My Lord, make me an establisher of prayer and of my children (too), our Lord, accept my prayer. Our Lord, forgive me and my parents and all the believers on the day of judgement.

With Abraham having left, Hajar knew she would soon run out of the little food and water she had been left with, and she realized that she would have to immediately start searching for more food and water.

Hajar started climbing the mountains surrounding the valley of Makkah, leaving her son Ismail at the bottom of the valley crying as she went looking for signs of any food or drink supply, a hoping to glimpse travelers in caravans that might be crossing the area.

Hajar was running from one mountain peak to another, searching the entire area surrounding the valley where her husband Abraham had left her and their newborn son, but she could not find any signs of supplies of food or water.

Just as her patience was running out, desperate and exhausted, God sent the Angel Gabriel to hit the ground next to the foot of the crying baby Ismail with the tip of his wing, to make a spring of water break out in the middle of the empty valley.

Hajar could not believe her eyes, and she ran down the mountain towards her son and the stream of water that was running out of the ground at his feet, and she started to build a small wall of sand around the issuing water so she could gather it for her son and herself to drink; and she was so desperate that she was saying to the water, Zam Zam meaning Gather or Collect, in her attempt to collect the running water, and so this spring was named the Spring of Zam Zam.

The believing mother knew deep inside her that God would not let her down, and though she never knew how God would take care of her and her son, to see such a miracle, of the spring appearing with no effort from herself, was the strongest evidence to her that God does not forget or abandon his devoted believers. Hajar passed God’s test of her belief and devotion.

The spring of Zam Zam was growing larger and larger, and Hajar and her baby son Ishmael were both satiated with its water, and with the water to drink, Hajar was more capable of breastfeeding her child to his fulfillment.

MAKKAH BECOMES A TOWN.

A while before Abraham’s trip to Makkah to leave his wife Hajar and son Ismail there, the city of Eden in Yemen was one of the greenest places in Arabia, thanks to very fertile soil and a great dam known as the Dam of Ma’areb, which the people of Eden had built to collect the rainwater for their agricultural way of living, making Eden a landmark destination for agricultural industry, and giving its people tremendous wealth and status in Arabia.

The Dam of Ma’areb was destroyed in a great flood, and the great famous gardens of Eden destroyed beyond any chance of being reconstructed for good agricultural use, nor were the people of Eden capable of rebuilding the dam of Ma’areb to its original shape and size.

This incident led to a great drought, which led to the loss of both the lush vegetation that the city was known for and the loss of the cattle industry that relied on that vegetation, as well as the loss of the great trading business across the region, which was dependent on the agriculture and cattle industries.

Because of this, many of the tribes of Eden decided to move to new grounds where new sources of life could be found, and so they traveled in caravans, mainly in search of good sources of fresh water outside of Eden.

One of these Arab tribes was the Jorhom who, in their travels across Arabia in search of a new land where a good source of water could be found to consider building a new home, crossed near the valley of Makkah and noticed birds flying in circles in the sky behind the mountains. The traders amongst the tribe of Jorhom knew this area, as they used to cross it in their trips from Yemen to the Levant, and they knew it to be a desert valley with no water or vegetation. However, seeing the birds flying in circles in the sky gave an indication of a source of life, so they decided to check that out.

Reaching the valley of Makkah, the people of Jorhom saw the spring of water and a lady with her son next to it, and the birds drinking from the water. The Jorhom approached the spring and greeted Hajar, and asked her if they could drink from that spring, and she let them do so.

The Jorhom realized that this area was good enough to settle in, and discussing this amongst themselves they decided to stay in the valley of Makkar and call it their new home. Being well-mannered Arabs, the Jorhom recognized that the rights to the water belonged to Hajar and Ismail, and they expressed to her their desire to settle in this valley and consider it their new home, and to share the water of the spring, and offered in return to give Hajar and her son Ismail protection.

Hajar, seeing how fair and gentle they were in their request, at a time when they could have just claimed the water all for themselves – after all, they were a full tribe, and she just a powerless lady with a small child – recognized their fairness and gentleness, and she accepted, as she also realized that this had to be God’s reply to her husband’s prayer to God asking him to lead the hearts of people to them when he said:

Our Lord, I have settled my children in an uncultivable valley next to your forbidden house, our Lord, for them to establish the worship of prayer, so cause the hearts of some people to be drawn towards them and grant to them fruits of all sorts so they may be thankful.

Abraham in his prayer asked for the Hearts of People to be drawn towards his wife and son. Perhaps God’s answer to Abraham’s specific prayer resulted in the tribe of Jurhum acknowledging the water of Zam Zam as the property of Hajar and Ishmael, as their Emotional Intelligence led them to be fair and kind. Perhaps the people of Jurhum realized that this mother and her child had been blessed with this spring of water, which appeared in a place they previously knew to be only desert and empty of any sign of life, so they desired for this blessing to be shared.

The Jurhum settled in Makkah, where Ishmael grew up in their Arabic language, and he married from Jurhum, and it was from his branch of the bloodline of his father Abraham that Muhammad would be born.

Abraham in his prayer called God’s holy house the Forbidden House, which is the Kaaba, located today in the Forbidden Mosque, in the Forbidden City, Makkah. Forbidden here means that it is prohibited to hunt there, prohibited to cut trees, and prohibited to start a war, for it is to be a city of absolute safety to all human and non-human beings.

ALLAH TESTS ABRAHAM AND ISMAIL

With Makkah being developed as a little town, according to Abraham’s prayer, Abraham would regularly visit his family there all the way from Palestine.

During one of Abraham’s visits to Makkah, he saw in a dream that he was slaughtering his only son at that time, Ismail, and it is believed that the dreams of Prophets and Messengers of God are one form of revelation, and the message Abraham took from his interpretation of this dream was that he was being ordered by God to slaughter his one and only son.

Abraham decided to share the dream he had dreamt with his son Ismail, perhaps to share his son in the test of God, and perhaps also to emotionally prepare him for the major test God had set them.

Son, I see in my dream that I am slaughtering you. Look, what do you see in it? He (Ishmael) said, ‘Father, do what you are being ordered, you will find me, with the will of Allah, upon the patient.’

Receiving the order to slaughter his son, his own flesh and blood, would have been the most difficult order for Abraham to receive. It made the situation even harder that Abraham was already old, and so was his wife Hajar, and with Ismail being his only son, but being the devoted believer he was, he put the order of God before his own emotions.

Ismail, knowing and believing his father to be a prophet and messenger of God, and being a devoted believer himself as well, replied to his father with all confidence to obey what God was ordering him to do and confirming to him that he would be patient in accepting God’s order.

No one was more disappointed to see this ultimate level of devotion of both father and son in responding and adhering to the order of God than the Devil was, as such examples of total submission to God were what he had devoted his life to fighting, since he, the Devil, had initially refused the order of God to him and all the angels to bow to Adam the day he was created. All the angels obeyed the order except the Devil, for he believed he was a better creature than Adam, he having been created out of fire and Adam out of dust. On that day the Devil was doomed, not only for disobeying the order of God, but for the reason behind his disobedience, and that is pride. On that day, the Devil asked God to grant him eternity in this life until it came to its end, a request that God granted him, and immediately after that he (the Devil) declared his devotion to misleading Adam and his children from following the orders of God.

With the task the Devil had taken on in his life, to mislead the children of Adam, he was most disappointed to see the total devotion of Abraham and his son to such a challenging order from God – for a father to slaughter his son, his only son.

Abraham prepared the knife that he would use for the slaughtering. He had it properly sharpened, and they started walking to the place where they would obey God’s order.

The Devil, seeing that Abraham and Ismail had actually started