A Byzantine Requiem

By Van Dimi

A Byzantine hard-boiled Noir P.I ? Someone had to do it ! History and fiction, the Eastern Roman Byzantine empire is packed with bloodbaths, intrigues, incest, adultery, mass murders e.t.c. A great environment for a sleuth to operate. Meet Theophilus-Theo Vardas ...and the Turk. History not like the one taught in school.
This, of course, is purely fictional. The Historical descriptions and facts although subjective, I have tried to maintain a neutral view according to the Historians.
The Byzantine or Eastern Roman empire met with its ultimate glory during the Justinian years. That’s what everyone says. Is all the rest pure “gossip”? Rancor and jealousy? They all agree about the nasty character of empress Theodora. And, as I said, this is a fictional novel of a probably wild imagination but some FACTS raise questions. The little time needed for the rebuilt of Hagia Sophia after it was destroyed. The whole thing took five years to be accomplished but IT HAS STARTED immediately after it had been destroyed to the point that some Historians and researchers wonder if it had been ordered long before and Anthemius and Isidorus had been working upon some secret state projects concerning a great church months before the “Nika riots”. And this by itself leaves an open space for an imagination like mine to make up stories like this one. At the time, there were already TWO great Basilica churches in Constantinople. Hagia Sophia AND Hagia Irene, both in great splendor and admiration. Isidorus’s “where the hell is he going to build it? Outside the walls?” appearing in the novel is a plausible question. The city didn’t need a THIRD Basilica!!! Thus, my narration is not completely misplaced.
I am not an author; this is the first time I try to write a novel -try to write anything- and I don’t know the technique. But... I am a huge Noir fan in both cinema and literature. I intended to write a hard-boiled detective P.I Historical Noirish novel. So much for the Noir ... History keeps the greatest part of it leaving little to the Noir crime fiction. Historical fiction is the most difficult kind, I have been told. I solemnly confess that after Jim Thomson, Philip Kerr, and his Bernie Gunther are my all-time favorites. Ir would have been pretentious of me to even try to navigate into their paths. Yet, audacious as I might have been at the age of 67, I gave it a go.
Writing a novel in the first-person narrative always offers the temptation to express some personal beliefs and ideas and I couldn’t avoid it. Historical facts are one thing though and personal beliefs another. I didn’t violate History, I simply used it to tell a story. You don’t have to agree with me. And, in any case, the intention was to write a Noir crime novel.
I used the “Byzantine empire History” by Vassiliev and by Charles Diehl, the Procopius Secret History albeit its contradictions, and the Malamas Chronicles in my research.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Van Dimi
• Release date: Sep 12, 2020
• ISBN: 9781005540579

Van Dimi

ABOUT ME. Retired from the grind. Reflecting on successes, failures, and regrets. Exploring new aspects of self, writing that book which will get me an Oscar, staying out of trouble - well, small amounts of trouble are OK. Alone in blessed singleness. Wicked sense of humor, enjoy my own company, glad I'm not young any longer. I do miss the intimacy of being in love. A good catch . . . at least. I love Intelligent conversation: hard to come by these days, though no one agrees with me, a good listener, intuitive, a good conversationalist, avoid boredom and boring people at all costs - that's a career all by itself.I am not a writer. I am a cooking chef. An educated cooking chef though. I’ve done my studies, got a University degree but instead of entering into the “system”, I’ve chosen to do what pleases me and not join the sheep -flock searching for a shepherd. A Greek old man living in France the last 20years,Vangelis Dimitroglou is my real name. Cinéphile and melomane confirmé, not un faux-cul. Here in France, they call the connoisseurs “pretentious” and the intelligent “arrogant”. I don’t care anymore.As a movie-music-literature lover I have a sweet spot for Jazz and the so-called Noir, films and books, not only the top class rated but al-so the B-movies and the pulp-fiction best sellers. Now, there are some great authors in that category like Dashiell Hammett, Raymond Chan-dler, Jim Thompson (the greatest), just to name a few from the past and some excellent new ones like Philip Kerr, Jo Nesbo, Michael Dibdin, again just to name a few. “writers” who at the age of 35 have al-ready produced 50 novels and are still writing a book once or twice a year aiming to sell books, commercialize the product, make money. They are largely different to those great ones that are/were AUTHORS, producing literature. I don’t care entering into either category, I honestly could use some huge money. No intention whatsoever to be-come immortal. An author writes a book expecting to be read, he writes for his readers with or without the intention to make money or glory. He-she has a target. I write books for myself! Fill up empty time. I don't expect anything from them and that's why they are FREE -and always be - The ones in Greek are the same under my real name(in GR) Βαγγέλης Δημητρογλου.I have not only watched but studied almost all the films-Noir and Neo-Noir if it matters, plus all the great movies the 7th art has produced, in decline nowadays thank you very much Netflix. As for music, my other passion, after classical music and Jazz all the rest is chill-out ambience sounds. And yes, I love aphorisms.World History has been my secondary passion. I believe we will never learn everything about our past and definitely never the truth. This “truth” has been suffering through centuries, it is not a modern invention. The fast-growing technology has created the terms “fake news” or “alternative truth” as if the truth is and always will be one and only. “The truth is rarely pure and never simple” said the great Os-car. Don’t ask Oscar, who? There was only one.History and crime, two things that go together like Siamese twins, let it be then. And a hard-boiled sleuth, not much different than the old, and new, famous ones. I’m a huge fan of Bernie Gunther, I confess.The East Roman-Byzantine empire has a history of 1000+ years, drowned in blood, intrigue, debauchery, violence and misery all at once, that led to its destruction, better known as Dark ages. Not at all a dull place for a sleuth!! They say that historic fiction is a difficult gen-re. Well, almost nothing in life comes easy. Otherwise, we would have nothing to be proud of every time we accomplice successfully a tough task, achieve an exploit, win a challenge.This is my first attempt to write a novel, to write anything. I definitely don’t want to insult your intelligence. I simply intend to challenge your ignorance and provoke your curiosity. The field is vast and intriguing and there might be more Theo Vardas adventures to come. I am getting older and older though every day, like you all, but I’m already 66y.o.OCTOBER 2020 EDIT: I think my Byzantine period is over, all old books removed to be re edited and republished...eventually, hopefully before I die. Not that I care about neither, republish or death. Yet, last time i talked with that hooded type with the scythe, he reassured me i still have time for more wicked Noir stories so, here i come with a new sleuth, Isidore Ducasse, transferring the action where i live in SW France. first book already out the next one's cooking in the oven. Considering I have some old Byzantine books to edit, re-write, enrich and republish ...i might live another 50 years and see grandchildren arriving. My twins, to whom I dedicate all books, are 22 now.

Book preview

VAN DIMI

A BYZANTINE REQUIEM

A HISTORICAL FICTION NOIR MYSTERY NOVEL

Theo Vardas No 1

Dedication

For the twins, Melina and Odysseas

(in chronological order)

Acknowledgments:

To no one this time!!! It’s a 100% solitary adventure fully accomplished by me, myself, and I alone. From A to Z. On second thought, the Amazon KDP system and the people in it, merit a huge thanks.

TABLE OF CONTENTS

Chapter titles are Jazz standards and they are linked to a Youtube video of my choice

1 September song

2 Mood indigo

3 Born to be blue

4 Days of wine and roses

5 These foolish things

6 Bluesette

7 The best is yet to come

8 Desafinado

9 The lady is a tramp

10 I’ m in a mood for love

11 The world on a string

12 Just friends

13 Fools rush in

14 Don’t fence me in

15 Where or when

16 It’s de-lovely

17 Blue rondo à la Turk

18 In a sentimental mood

19 In a mellotone

20 Taking a chance on love

21 Tell me all about it

22 I’m confessin’

23 Dat dere

24 Sophisticated lady

25 For all we know

26 Sentimental Journey

Epilogue All the things you are

AUTHOR’S NOTE

1 SEPTEMBER SONG

Constantinople, September 531 A.D. A beautiful time in the Vassilevoussa (Greek, the one that reigns), the great cosmopolitan capital of the glorious Eastern Roman empire now named Byzantine. The sunset painted the buildings in bright orange color and, orange and lemon trees blossoms gave a unique smell in the air. Noisy streets, noisy people, quarreling, arguing, fighting all about silly religious questions, flooding blood in the streets as if there was not enough blood wasted in wars. The new emperor, Justinian, adopted son and right-hand man of the emperor Justin with no blood links, had been unanimously acclaimed albeit all disapproval along with his controversial wife, Theodora, an ex-bear-dancer and harlot whom the ruling class of the noblemen aristocrats had never welcome. When Justinian proclaimed her as co-empress, the scandal was too big to be swallowed and the dislike of the noble class turned into loathing. The two emperors ruled with an iron fist, no one had ever dared to think or act differently, people have been decapitated for minor issues. The emperor’s, and his wife, non-noble ancestors, and blood, his brutal and unsophisticated behavior matching his peasant roots, his low-level education -he couldn’t speak and write Greek but rumors had it he was studying hard to become an educated scholar- had always been matters of hatred dislike but now, with his new tax-collector John the Cappadocian attacking each and every one, clergy included, to fill up the national treasury, had caused numerous incidents of popular dislike and manifestations against the ruling couple and the court. Add the religious debates about the ‘nature of Jesus Christ’ and the Arian-Monophysite movement within the clergy circle technically transferred upon the shoulders of common people pious or not, the capital was an over- boiling kettle in the boarders of an explosion. Street fights and angry protests were an everyday spectacle usually ending in blood.

It’s been almost two years now that Papi Archimedes (grandpa) had died, two years in a total emptiness, thinking. and thinking, and thinking trying to figure out what I am going to do with my life and the only answer I could come up to was I don’t know. I spent most of the days in the baths, mixed baths, the doctrine about different baths for men and women is a myth. As you may know, the famous public baths in Constantinople, except for, of course, being an astonishing architectural beauty, displaying violently stolen magnificent statues and artifacts from almost everywhere, especially Greece, had been famous for their splendor. Today, invaluable stolen artifacts are displayed behind glass windows in huge buildings, usually of state property, without baths, alas, called Museums. So, the baths…. they had three sections. The hot, the warm, and the cold. And maybe mixed areas were not the hot and warm section, but in the cold section, where various kinds of activities could take place like eating, drinking socializing, sports training, etc., you could come across just about anyone, male or female. Not to mention some rather secret and probably illegal private baths only for the few, where no strings attached anything goes was the name of the game in all three sections. When I’m not in the baths, I study the things I have not studied yet from Papi's huge library, I drink the best of my wine…oh yes, I am supposed to be a wine merchant for a living, sexercise with the day’s or the week’s latest catch and follow a real exercise morning program every day as a ritual, imposed to me by the Turk

Papi Archimedes, among other things, was a very rich man. When he passed away, I became his only heir. That includes the winery and the stock house, the retail huge shop in Messe street or Rigia, Messi odos.gr, the palace-like house, the Samos vineyard, the boat, and … the Turk. The best I can do with wine is to drink it and/or evaluate it. Papi had been a great teacher in that field, too. As for me, I was a total ignorant regarding business, financial administration, or winemaking. A useless null, a Beotian.

{Beotie was the district in the north of Athens-Attica district, its capital Thebes had met with golden ages of glory with Oedipus and/or Antigone but…the inhabitants carried a long-life reputation of being totally dumb, illiterate and slots thus providing the adjective ‘Beotian’ for someone bearing all these …qualities.}

Papi was hopelessly disappointed with this total refusal. Fortunately, there was Charidemos, Papi's business right-hand man into his mid-50’s He had been with Papi almost all his life, he was reliable, honest, and hardworking. After Papi died, I had asked to see him in my chambers. He felt kind of awkward when he came in, with the Turk standing by the door.

Do you have someone to replace you in case you die? I asked.

Will you sack me or kill me, master Theo?

Don’t be silly, answer the question

My second, Lucas, is a bright young man, I suppose

Good. Teach him everything my Papi has taught you. Come back tomorrow same time, bring Augustina with you.

Augustina is the head housekeeper.

And, listen, you are my second-best friend after the Turk -Ahmed raised a smile at the door- how could I possibly wish something ill for you? Come back for the documents tomorrow. With Augustina

Cheridemos had been in charge of everything concerning the business, the winery, the trade, imports-exports, and the administration of the Messe retail shop. He had had around 100 employees to handle. Above all, he had to cook the figures to avoid those ridiculous taxes that the new emperor’s tax collector, John the Cappadocian, a ruthless jackal bearing a nasty reputation and, at the present moment, the most loathed person in the empire.

As known till modern times, rich people like to pay small taxes, wealthy people like paying no taxes at all. I am not wealthy.

Augustina had a big household to run, administrating 25-30 people, some with families, and she managed everything with outstanding efficiency.

The next day, they both came with a questioning face.

OK, I will try to make it short, after all, it is all written here I showed the envelope on the table. "you have both been with my grandfather for almost forty years and there is a reason for this, which I will not bother to explain. I am not Archimedes i.e. The master of the Thinking (arch= master, chef and medos= thinking, creating ideas) I am his grandson and I don’t value a hair from his balls compared to him. Which means I can absolutely not do what he did. So, you will have to do it for me. You Charidemos, are aware of all my granddad’s financial administration. This will remain unchangeable. What will change is the split of the profits. It will be 40% for Charidemos, 40% for Augustina, and 20% for me which will be plenty to live with. As of tomorrow, you will double all the salaries, in the house and the business and I presume, after that, your 40% will be reduced to 20% which will make us equal associates. The Turk, who is more than a brother to me, has very little or none at all need of money but, whenever he needs it, he takes as much as he wants from anyone among us. Mind you, it will never be for his own use, I can assure you. All these are written in these papers I have signed and if you agree, you’ll sign them too.

The Turk raised a smile again, their faces turned illuminated by a strange light like a halo above their heads, Augustina shyly asked.

Are you sure about that, master Theo

I shouldn’t have signed the papers before you come if I wasn’t, should I? Let’s have a hug to conclude so we did

I still remain the owner of everything though and you the executors so, allow me a little capricious demand from both of you. From Charidemos, I would like to be the first who tastes an exceptional new wine and I’d love a personal stock for my exclusive use. From Augustina, I would like the same quality of food of course plus something extra. I’d like clean sheets in my bed every day. Going to bed in a clean lavender smelling sheet every night is an ultimate pleasure especially if someone else does it for you Are you Okay with these?"

Master Theo, these are the least we can do. The whole house will be happy and soon forget the loss of the old master. May God make you live forever

My sweet aunt Augustina, you know that in this house the word god does not exist. Papi’s rules and principals, why mine would be different? Respect that when you’re with me, do whatever you like with your personal life……. please.

They have both made a move to kiss my hands and they turned red-faced when I pretended to be angry. After they had left with their signed papers, the Turk came closer and asked

And me? I do not get a hug?

Get out of here you fucking pervert. Bring some good wine to have a drink before getting ready to go out with the gracious gorgeous Aureliana. And, tonight, I don’t need a watchdog

Silly young master. Have you ever noticed you had a watchdog but only when you needed one?

Truth is that the Turk -only me myself and I called him Ahmed. And Papi. For anyone else he was just the Turk, Ahmed had this unexplainable talent to appear out of nowhere and to move silently like a shadow. He was right. I had never noticed when he was following me but only the moment, he had appeared to save me from trouble. And ‘trouble’ was my middle name.

I am Theophilus Vardas, grandson of the redoubtable Archimedes Bacchus Andronicus and son of my despicable mass murderer and brutal assassin father Babylas Vardas and Helena, Archimedes’ daughter, and, …… a sleuth, P I, informant, detective, dick, gumshoe, shamus will be but I didn’t know it yet.

2 MOOD INDIGO

The Turk appeared at the door -you could never hear him, only see him– and said

Master Isidorus came to see you and he looks very agitated

Well, show him in then

Isidorus of Miletus, great mathematician, physician, philosopher, architect, academic, and my beloved teacher for the 3 years that Papi Archimedes had sent me in his school. He held the most famous school of the capital asking for modest fees and his signature was obvious on the facades of great buildings. A low-profile genius like all geniuses ought to be

When Isidorus came in and dropped himself in an armchair breathing heavily after climbing the two-story staircase, he bypassed all my courtesy gestures and welcome, and like begging, he said

Theophilus my boy, I need your help

You can have all my money and all my wine, master.

Do not be a presumptuous idiot young man, it doesn’t become you. Nothing of that sort. My daughter is missing for 3 days now

I can assure you she’s not in my chambers, master

You do it again! I want you to find her, fatheaded idiot

"Allow me to hardly understand you, master. Elaborate, please

You know the current and the less current situation in Constantinople, don’t you?

I do and I don’t care. Actually, I don’t give a stray’s dog shit

"That’s exactly the whole point. That you don’t care, you’re not a stupid religious idiot, far less a military mongrel. Plus, that you’re highly intelligent, for which I am personally well aware of, young,