Do It All Dad Does Jokes

By Michael Kornbluth

Do It All Dad Does jokes is collection of clean yet edgy one liners from the Do It All Dad Year Podcast about tech censorship, demonizing Trump supporters, Hollywood resistor hysteria, Big Tech censorship and raising boys in the era of #meto and about how Obama ruined everything, sports, comedy, Hair Metal included.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Michael Kornbluth
• Release date: Sep 1, 2020
• ISBN: 9781005050986

Michael Kornbluth

Michael Kornbluth is the author of a parenting memoir Controlling My Kids With Comedy, A Love Story, Do It All Dad Does Jokes, a spiritually powered, midlife crisis reinvention tale, The Great American Jew Novel and a pre-election comedy special Resist This. The Good Men Project made him a featured author, publishing 24 of his blogs about serving lady laugh and being an involved, stay at home dad and father of 3 in his quest to get paid as the star author voice behind the remote work revolution while hosting the Do It All Dad Year Podcast, which secures his good guy, non-divisive status but not really.Michael Kornbluth has also played the role of Hair Metal Comedian Historian, when he was hired to write all the TV host script reads for America's Hard 100, a music video countdown special, voted on by 1.5 million fans on VH1 Classic, hosted by WWE great Chris Jericho. Fire and Knives, voted best new food magazine in England, published his short food fiction pieces such as My Very Last Meal, I Don't Drink German Rieslings and Anthony Bourdain Rips My Frozen Lunch Apart. His 30 Rock script, the Kings of Comedy, placed 3rd in the THE SPEC SCRIPTACULAR, which made him a Recommended Writer on TV Writer.com.The Do It All Dad Year Podcast, what Gen X Dads understand, has generated more than 11,000 downloads and his Do It All Dad Year Blog has produced more than 15,000 pages views since his lucky number 3, Samuel Chosen Curls, Was Bound To Woo, was born. Controlling our kids with comedy, can make our kids great again, Do It All Dad's 3 fuss free kids, 98.7 percent of the time, are living proof of it. John Lennon wishes he was this productive during his stay at home dad years.

Book preview

Do It All Dad

Does Jokes

Michael Kornbluth

Do It All Dad Does Jokes

Copyright © 2019 Kornbluth Michael

All Rights Reserved.

This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents either are the products of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously. Any resemblance to actual persons living or dead, events, or locales is entirely coincidental.

No part of this book may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, graphic, electronic or mechanical, without the written permission of the author, except where permitted by law.

Formatting by Rik – Wild Seas Formatting

To my wife Natalia Anna Duffy Kornbluth, my best friend,

my everything, before God and our three children became permanent fixtures in my heart. After almost never getting out of LA alive, all the infinite beauty in my life stems from you being the only woman I’ve

loved with my all. Your constant support has helped me become more

than just a Schmuck in a headset. Your love has prevented the depths

of rage from swallowing my soul whole, and I’ll cherish you with

every bit of my being forevermore.

Introduction

Comic genius Norm Macdonald once said, Comedy is where truth meets fiction.

The majority of the punchlines in this book showcase slices of real-life moments, coupled with an exaggerated truth, a deeply felt point of view, and a bit of over-the-top fiction. For all those who claimed, I was never funny, I’ll let these joke gems speak for themselves.

Chapter 1: Hate Speech Dragon

The NY Times post fake news says full-time working parents today are more actively engaged with their children and spend more time teaching them than stay-at-home mothers did in the 1970s. So, stay at home mothers during the seventies slept on the job from being slipped too many Quaaludes while dreaming of Bill Cosby’s family friendly sweaters? I don’t get it.

Fuck China. Chinese made Fentanyl has killed more crackers in this country, than Lena Dunham kicking it with Taylor Swift on Instagram.

Has Minnesota Rep Baby Face Omar, acknowledged the anniversary of Amy Winehouse’s death as something happened, to a horn hiding, Benjamin lover, who exploited the great Palestinian Songbook for all it was worth?

Hate is good because it motivates to seek out places where your presence is valued and appreciated like at Trump rally behind your wife’s back, to make your sex life above average again. Put my man meat in Indiana MILF. I’m ready to play, play.

Did you know can you be fined 250 thousand dollars for using dehumanizing language on an Illegal Alien in New York City, like no speak English? Whose translating these insults for Juan exactly? Now, an illegal immigrant in New York City gets a driver license to vote and a hate speech translator to bankrupt Apu, at a Bodega in Flushing.

Did you see Ellen chilling with W at the Cowboys game? Ellen claims their actually friends. What do they share in common besides being pro Bush?

Seinfeld just auctioned off one of his Porsches for charity. I hope half those proceeds went to Larry’s kids.

Larry David tells the NY Times, Trump doesn’t have 1 redeeming quality, at least Stalin had 1.