Letting Go of the Past

By Alexa Kane

Alex Jacobs has made a good life for himself since he left his hometown behind him eleven years ago. He graduated college, got an amazing job that he loves and he found an incredible girlfriend that makes him happy. He thought he managed to put his past behind him, until a run in with his high school girlfriend changes everything.

Ryleigh Peterson moved to Seattle to get her life back on track, which means keeping her head down and studying hard so that she can graduate nursing school. Everything is going according to plan, until a chance encounter with her ex threatens everything she has worked so hard to achieve. When Alex offers to help Ryleigh out of a jam, it seems harmless enough but Ryleigh has been carrying secrets around with her for far too long that she is desperate to keep.

Will Alex and Ryleigh manage to put their past behind them or will Ryleigh’s secrets finally come to light, destroying everything that they have worked so hard to achieve.

Letting Go of the Past is the sixth instalment in the For Keeps series but can be read as a standalone. Due to its explicit content, bad language and graphic sexual content, Letting Go of the Past is recommended for mature readers of eighteen years and above.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Alexa Kane
• Release date: Aug 27, 2020
• ISBN: 9781005119621

Alexa Kane

Alexa Kane is a contemporary romance author and Secrets and Deception is her debut novel.Alexa lives in Australia with her husband but she calls New Zealand home.

Book preview

For Keeps Series Book Six

By Alexa Kane

No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted, in any form or by any means – electronic, mechanical, including photocopying, recording, or by any information storage and retrieval system – without prior written permission of the publisher, nor be otherwise circulated in any form or biding or cover than that in which it is published and without a similar condition being imposed on the subsequent purchaser.

This book is licensed for your personal enjoyment only. This book may not be re-sold or given away to other people. If you would like to share this book with another person, please purchase an additional copy for each reader. If you’re reading this book and did not purchase it, or it was not purchased for your use only, then please return to your favorite retailer and purchase your own copy. Thank you for respecting the hard work of this author.

Published by Alexa Kane

Copyright 2020 by Alexa Kane

All Rights Reserved. ©

This book is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places and incidents either are the product of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, events, or locales, is entirely coincidental.

The author acknowledges all song titles, song lyrics, film titles, film characters, trademarked statuses, brands, mentioned in this book are the property of, and belong to, their respective owners. The publication / use of these trademarks is not authorized / associated with, or sponsored by the trademark owners.

Author’s Note

Because of its explicit sexual content, mature themes and bad language, it is suitable for readers over 18 years of age.

I hope you enjoy reading Alex’s story.

Contents

Title Page

Copyright

Author’s Note

Chapter 1 - Alex

Chapter 2 - Ryleigh

Chapter 3 - Alex

Chapter 4 - Ryleigh

Chapter 5 - Alex

Chapter 6 - Ryleigh

Chapter 7 - Alex

Chapter 8 - Ryleigh

Chapter 9 - Alex

Chapter 10 - Ryleigh

Chapter 11 - Ryleigh

Chapter 12 - Alex

Chapter 13 - Ryleigh

Chapter 14 - Alex

Chapter 15 - Alex

Chapter 16 - Ryleigh

Chapter 17 - Alex

Chapter 18 - Ryleigh

Chapter 19 - Ryleigh

Chapter 20 - Alex

Chapter 21 - Ryleigh

Chapter 22 - Ryleigh

Chapter 23 - Alex

Chapter 24 - Alex

Chapter 25 - Ryleigh

Chapter 26 - Alex

Chapter 27 - Ryleigh

Chapter 28 - Alex

Chapter 29 - Ryleigh

Chapter 30 - Ryleigh

Chapter 31 - Alex

Chapter 32 - Ryleigh

Chapter 33 - Alex

Chapter 34 - Ryleigh

Chapter 35 - Alex

Chapter 36 - Ryleigh

Chapter 37 - Ryleigh

Thank you very much for reading

CHAPTER 1

Alex

Dude…duuude…what sare you lookings at?

Slowly my head turns from the crowd to look at one of my good friends, Kyle. It takes a minute to steady myself enough to focus on him.

If I turn my head too quickly then the world spins.

The world spinning is not good, it makes me too dizzy.

Boobs, I reply simply.

I’m looking for boobs.

But more specifically, the most gorgeous pair of tits I have ever laid eyes on.

Dude, look around sthere are bo, booobs severywhere, Kyle looks around the room and gestures with his hands, he takes in the sights around us then exclaims, It’s fucking amaaazing!

He’s right, there are tits on display everywhere tonight and that’s why he dragged me here. We’re at Ripley Jacks, a seedy bar on the outskirts of town and tonight it’s Tuesday, which means topless bar maids.

I’ve had one way too many, wait, one too many…way too many.

I can’t even count but Kyle has been sulking lately that all his friends are shacked up, so we have to entertain him every once in a while or he gets bored and stirs up trouble.

Nah mans, these tits sare like…fuck, they’re somefink else. I think I’ve seen em befores. I swear I’ve fucking seen these tits before but they look different.

I don’t know.

But I need to see them again.

Once my head swivels back to take in the people around me, I catch a small glimpse of large, beautiful titties that make me salivate at the mouth. Her nipples are pink and begging me to suck on them.

No.

No sucky, Melissa wouldn’t like that.

I have to be good for Melissa, I like her.

I feel myself being shoved sideways, Did you sees them, you looks like you sees thems.

Yeah…but I loss em. Where did those pretty titties go?

I like Melissa’s boobies, so much but these ones are something else.

Where are they?

We order more drinkies then she comes overs, Kyle lifts his hand to signal a waitress.

That’s fucking brilliant! Kyle’s so smart.

But I don’t want another drink.

We were only supposed to have one and my car’s here, I’m going to have to leave it here and Melissa will know.

She’s so awesome but we haven’t fought yet, if I tell her I spent the night at Ripley Jacks on a Tuesday night then I think we will fight.

I think she will fight me if I tell her about the titties.

I keep them to self.

In my brain.

That’s a good place to keep secret pretty boobies.

Oi, ones coming over and is think it’s her…her tits sare amazing, I look at Kyle but then realize I should be looking at the room.

My head turns but then it starts to spin cos I went too fast, when the room clears I see them.

Fucking perfection.

I gasp at the sight in front of me and my dick instantly goes hard in my pants.

Fuck, they’re stunning.

Blinking, I take mental pictures with my mind.

Normally I would hit that but I can’t no more, I have to be good.

Sort of good.

Maybe I can touchy them.

Lifting my hand, I can feel myself swaying but I’m getting closer to those beautiful pink nipples.

Suddenly my hand is swatted away and someone yells at me, it must be the waitress.

Whoops.

My head starts to gravitate up to her face but it takes a moment for my eyes to catch up.

When my eyes make contact with her face, they go wide, so wide.

I fucking know her.

I’ve sucked and fucked those perfect titties hundreds of times before.

For one moment, one sweet, beautiful moment, I’m taken back to a time in my life when everything was perfect, but then I remember those beautiful puppies are evil, Evil titties, bad…get thems away!

You need to go home Alex, you’re drunk, she crosses her arms over her chest but I can still see those big boobs.

Why does she have to have such nice boobs?

Why did she have to take those boobs away? It wasn’t fair.

It was so sudden.

So out of the blue.

She didn’t even give me a proper explanation; she just crushed my soul and left my life for good, taking those pretty boobies with her.

FuckyouIhateyou, the room is starting to spin again which is not good, I want to yell at her some more. I have a lot of resentment towards this girl that has been festering for years but even though I hate her, it doesn’t change the fact that I still love her boobs.

Where did the boobs go?

Duuuude, do you sucking know her? That’s awesome! Best. Night. Ever. Was that Kyle?

It sounded like Kyle but it’s hard to tell, I can’t see him anymore. Wait, he’s probably looking at the boobies too. That’s not fair, those boobies are mine, well, not mine, they were but no more.

Why does she have her boobies out for everyone to see anyway? She should have those bad boys covered up otherwise people like us are going to leer at her.

She’s leaning closer to me now; her mouth is moving but what is she saying? Alex…home…you need to…

Like she has any right to try and tell me what to do, You traidator, I slur.

She flinches but that’s exactly what she is, she promised me forever but that was a lie.

She’s a liar.

She was a liar at eighteen years old and she’s a liar now.

There is no way that I can ever trust her again. Not after the way she hurt me.

Alex, please let me call you a cab or I’m going to have security escort you out. Why is she acting like she cares about me? She doesn’t care about me, she never did.

Why does she still have to be so beautiful?

She should have gotten ugly, that would have been way better. I could have laughed in her face about how she got old and ugly and had saggy boobs but that’s not true.

She’s not a teenage girl anymore, she’s a woman now and fuck my life does it suit her.

Life can be an unfair bitch sometimes.

Let me…just let me…one more time, I reach up and brush my hand across her breast. When I make contact with her nipple she leans backwards out of reach but it’s too late, I saw her shiver. You likey. Too bad, no you cock anymore.

She’s crazy if she thinks I’m going to put my cock anywhere near her ever again. My cock belongs to Melissa now, she had her chance and blew it so now Melissa gets to blow on it only.

I know Alex okay and I’m sorry but you need to go home. Her eyes, her fucking eyes, so big and beautiful, so unique and grey. They are so full of concern and tenderness.

Fucking bitch.

I not go with you, I’m never going home with her again, not after what she did to my poor heart.

Melissa hasn’t hurt my heart, not yet anyway but I don’t think she will, she’s nice and warm not like this viper.

I never asked you too, we were over a long time ago and it’s best that it stays that way.

My heart.

Why would she say that to me?

She’s so hurtful and mean.

Fucks you…I gaves you everything. I gave this bitch my whole heart and she ripped it to shreds.

She fucking left me.

She fucking destroyed me.

She walked out of my life and never looked back, never tried to contact me again, never tried to explain or apologize for the way she treated me.

She was everything and then all at once she was nothing at all.

I think I hear Kyle speak so I turn my head to look for him but it’s too fast, then I turn the other way and I’m spinning again.

I feel sick.

It’s too spin spin.

I feel something come out of my mouth; did I just vomit?

I can’t see.

Wait, I can.

No, fuck.

I feel like falling.

My head hits something and then the world goes black.

CHAPTER 2

Ryleigh

I feel like I’m being watched.

That’s normal considering where I’m working but tonight feels different, it feels like I’m being singled out and it brings an uneasy feeling to the pit of my stomach.

Last month one of the girls was attacked walking to her car just after close, luckily the bouncer was still watching all of the girls in the carpark and he was able to step in quickly but it makes me wonder what I’m still doing here.

The money is fantastic and I rely on it heavily but I don’t know how much longer I can keep this up.

It’s degrading.

Tuesday night is the only night that I work at Ripley Jacks and it just so happens to be Topless Tuesday.

It’s a way for the club to bring in extra cash on the slower nights and the waitresses get paid extra for being on display.

If I wasn’t so desperate to finish nursing school, I wouldn’t be here but I don’t bring in enough extra cash at my other job to pay my bills.

Besides, it’s only one more year.

One more year of this shit and then I can call it quits.

I’ve just dropped off a tray of dirty glasses at the bar when I notice an attractive looking guy signal me that he wants a drink.

Walking over, I try to keep a smile on my face. I’ve learnt that if I play along with most of the guys flirting then it increases the size of my tip. Plus, my boss hates it when he catches me scowling at the assholes who make crude jokes at me and the other girls.

It’s clear where we rate on the scale of things and it’s not very high. We’re easily replaceable, or so I’ve been told on more than one occasion.

When I see who is sitting at the table alongside the guy who waved me over, my steps falter and the smile slips off my face.

Alex Jacobs.

My ex-boyfriend.

My high school sweetheart.

The complete and utter love of my life.

Until I had to let him go.

I haven’t seen Alex in three years but seeing him now brings all that pain right back to the surface. All those feelings I thought I had long since buried come roaring back to the front of my mind.

I’m standing directly in front of him now but he hasn’t looked up yet, he is completely shit faced.

I should walk away; he hasn’t noticed me yet so I would be able to make a clean getaway. It was easy to walk away last time I saw him as he was with his friends and laughing and joking around, he seemed happy. It’s not as easy to walk away from him now.

I’ve always had this intense desire to protect Alex and it’s one of the reasons why I broke up with him after we finished high school.

Seeing him like this makes me want to take him home and tuck him into his bed to make sure he is safe. This isn’t exactly a nice part of town and a guy in his condition would be a prime target for muggers.

When his hand start moving towards my chest, I realize all too late that my upper half is completely bare.

Just my fucking luck.

I bat his hand away before he can touch my breast but he seems completely zoned out, Alex…Alex, are you alright? Alex, I think it’s time you went home.

Nothing.

His eyes are glazed and his mouth is hanging open.

Just when I am about to get security to put these guys in a taxi, Alex’s eyes lock with mine.

His reaction is slow, I’m guessing from the amount of alcohol he has consumed but it’s clear the minute my features registers with him.

His face goes pale and his mouth starts opening and closing like he is trying to say something.

His friend is harping on about something but I ignore him, Alex has my complete and undivided attention.

You need to go home Alex, you’re drunk, I can’t believe this is happening tonight of all nights. We are extra busy in here tonight and if I’m seen spending too long on one table then I will get in trouble.

My boss is a complete hard ass and he expects absolute perfection from every girl in here even though this place probably wouldn’t pass a health inspection. Looking around, I can’t see Mick anywhere but that doesn’t mean he won’t already be watching me, I need to get Alex out of here and quickly.

FuckyouIhateyou. Ouch, but I guess I deserve that after what I did to him.

Hurting Alex was the last thing that I ever wanted to do but I don’t regret it, it was the right thing to do. If Alex knew the truth, he never would have let me go and all I have ever wanted is for him to be happy. To have a great and fulling life, the moment I knew that I would only drag him down, I let him go.

Alex please, it’s time for you to go home. You need to stand up and make your way to the front, I’ll get security to put you in a taxi. Seeing him like this makes me want to drop everything and take care of him but I need to let him go once more.

Alex is someone that I can’t bring back into my life, just looking into his eyes is too painful and he deserves more than what I can give him.

His lips are moving but all I hear is a mumble that sounds roughly like he is calling me a traitor.

Alex, please let me call you a cab or I’m going to have security escort you out. I should have already called security over here but they can be a bit rough sometimes, normally I don’t care about the guys that get thrown out of here but I don’t want Alex to get hurt. I want him to make it home safely.

I make the mistake of leaning in to try and help him up but he takes that opportunity to grab my breast and he rubs my nipple with his thumb. The contact surprises me and I jump backwards to get out of his reach.

It’s been eleven years since he has touched any part of my body but it still reacts in the exact same way it used to.

During high school I practically used to melt into a puddle every time he kissed me