Ashes: Rusted and Reckless, #4

By Charlotte Casey

Something to fight for…

Lead singer of Rusted and Reckless, Phoenix "Nix" Noland is barely staying legit. Home from rehab, Nix is climbing the walls and fighting the urge for his next fix. But when his feisty, new neighbor in a wedding gown sparks his interest, Nix knows he wants more.

Jilted at the altar, Ruby Stevens is ready to start over. Betrayed by her family, she's free to do what she wants—when she wants. And the sexy singer from across the hall just might be the distraction she needs. But when Nix's addiction puts him on the edge, it's up to Ruby to pull him back. Can this particular Phoenix rise from the demons and ashes of his past?

• Language: English
• Publisher: Charlotte Casey
• Release date: Apr 24, 2018
• ISBN: 9781386500735

Charlotte Casey

USA Today Bestselling Author, Charlotte Casey, has roots in country that go back to singing Achy Breaky Heart in her car seat at the top of her lungs. She finds nothing sweeter and nothing more desirable than a southern man with drawl. A romantic at heart, Charlotte couldn’t imagine reading or writing anything that doesn’t revolve around romance. Her stories may be fiction but her characters will leap from the pages and pull you into their world. 

Book preview

Chapter One

The odd ones were on the right.

As Ruby walked down the hallway, weighed down with numerous bags and pulling two suitcases behind her, she counted the doors looking for 629, her new home. From a farmhouse in Austin to a one-bedroom apartment in Asheville, North Carolina. Apparently, when she needed a change, she really needed a change.

She glanced to her right and saw door 628.

Just one more.

Ruby couldn't even force herself to smile. The pleasant look she had plastered on her face the last week was beginning to crack. One more room and she would be home. She'd be in a safe place where she could finally drop her bags and...and what? Cry, scream, yell? She already did all that and more. Cursing, drinking and vandalism could easily be added to that list--nothing she was proud of but all things that had felt really good at the time.

She stopped at the last door in the hallway and shuffled some bags around to reach her pocket for the key. Ruby now understood how a pack mule felt. If she leaned too far to either side, she'd probably topple over.

The property manager had given her a ring of keys three minutes earlier. Already, she had forgotten which one was for the apartment. She picked the most front door like key and went for it.

Didn't work. It went in ok but wouldn't turn.

Really? she asked the door. Hadn't she been through enough shit? The universe was well and truly against her lately.

Ruby tried again because even under all that pissed off pessimism, there were some stray optimistic thoughts in her.

It still didn't turn.

With a frustrated groan, she pulled it out and picked a different key, one that she thought was for the front of the building, but that one didn't even fit in the lock.

Her lips pressed together, she growled, kicking the door.

Open dammit!

The next key was too small, definitely a mailbox key. That left only one more but it looked like it went to a padlock.

Just as she was getting ready to kick the door again and try the first key another time, the door opened. It scared her half to death.

After driving seventeen hours and being up for more than thirty hours, Ruby wasn't sure if the man in front of her was real or a mirage. That face and those pecks belonged in a magazine...the dirty kind that was stored behind the counter at a convenience store. It was hard to decide what she wanted to look at first, his cut jawline or the tanned bare chest. Oh, definitely the happy trail...

She had been told there would be a welcome basket but this was too much.

The man looked her over just as thoroughly as she was doing to him, although more discreetly and with considerably less drool. Ruby was still in a daze staring at him and feeling like she was about to collapse under the weight of all her bags. Even if she wanted to look away and end being this incredibly rude gaping stranger, she couldn't. She was just too damn tired and he was too damn sexy.

The man waited for her to say something but those things that come together to form those other things that let humankind communicate weren't working for her.

Can I help you?

Oh dear lord, that voice. Like all the best things in life, it was rich, sweet and deep.

Ma'am? Are you ok? The amused confusion he had been watching her with was turning into concern.

Ruby mentally slapped herself. She really needed a bed. Her Mama didn't teach her to act like this no matter the circumstance.

Yes, sorry I'm... Her eye caught the door and every ounce of energy she had been holding on to leached from her. Oh shit, she said and dropped one of her bags to the ground. The satchel that held her laptop and tablet made a thud as it hit the floor.

His eyes followed hers and found what she was staring at. Understanding brightened his eyes. Wrong door?

Who the hell numbered these doors? Ruby looked at the door to the right and saw 627. Logically, that would make this 629. But no, it was 649. She was tired, there was no doubt about that, but she still knew how to count.

There's a hallway behind you. The numbers continue down there and end here. I know, it's strange. The nice, half-naked man said to her silent, gaping mouth.

I am so sorry, she said picking her bag back up while trying not to topple over. If she wasn't so tired, she'd be embarrassed.

The man shrugged. No worries. My guess is you are down the hall.

Ruby looked behind her and sighed. It was so far away.

Do you need any help? he asked looking at her with pity.

Well, she felt pretty pitiful.

Still, she would make it. This buttercup was sucking it up and continuing onward. Alone.

No, thank you. I can make it. Sorry to disturb you. Ruby grabbed the handles of her suitcases and turned before he had a chance to close his door. She was halfway down the hall when she heard it click closed.

He was right, her apartment was right there down the short hallway. Her key worked on the first try and home greeted her. Well, boxes greeted her. Ruby's stuff had been delivered earlier. She wheeled her suitcases into the apartment and closed the door. On her kitchen counter was a basket with dish soap, toilet paper, a box of macaroni and cheese along with some other random apartment essentials.

She sighed. I like the other gift basket better.

She dropped her bags and her aching shoulders wailed a ‘hallelujah.’

Bed. Sleep. After a solid eight hours, she'd figure out all this crap along with what came next for her.

Ruby found her bedroom and didn't even care that her bed wasn't put together and her mattress was on the floor. She smiled dreamily at it.

I'll be with you in just a minute, Sweets, she told the eighteen inches of springs and foam.

The blinds were wide open and it was an obnoxiously sunny day. Ruby went to the window and grabbed hold of the cord. Her view left much to be desired. The parking lot wasn't really that interesting. Plus she was on the corner so half of her view was more apartment building. The one closest to her had their blinds up and the window open. Unlike her, someone was appreciating the sunny day. That someone came into view as he walked across his bedroom, phone in hand and digging through a pile of laundry.

She had barely registered the man whose apartment she tried to break into before he had looked up and spotted her staring like a freak.

Ruby squeaked when he frowned at her and tugged on the cord letting the blinds drop. She put her back to the wall and banged her head softly against the drywall.

I hate my life.

Phoenix, you still there? Jayden asked.

Nix watched the woman walk down the hall and stop in front of her apartment. His lips turned up in an unexpected smile as she looked twice at the numbers before trying her key.

At first, he had thought it was some fan trying to break in. They hadn't found him yet but security here wasn't very good. His face had been plastered all over the media in recent weeks. It was only a matter of time before this happened. It was part of the reason he put it off so long. But Nix had not realized how hard it would be to get used to all the attention again. He had liked his year of obscurity, more than he thought he would have.

Hey, Jayden said in his ear again.

Yeah, sorry. Someone was at my door. Nix closed and locked the door.

Although he could afford more, when he had searched for an apartment, he had wanted something a roadie could afford. Kelly, the band's front of house and the only person who knew where he had been this past year, had put the lease in his name to help Nix hide.

Everything alright?

Nix sighed and scratched his head. He had been talking to their manager, Darcy, earlier and asked if he should grow out his hair again. It's why he had called Jayden, his counselor. Darcy was concerned that seeing himself as he used to be would lead him to pick up old habits again.

Yeah, I don't know. I'm trying to be who I was and it's more difficult than I thought it would be.

Jayden laughed. Well, yeah. You aren't that person anymore.

I know, but they all seem to expect me to be. Sawyer is having the most difficulty.

You knew he'd be a pain in the ass for a while.

Which he was, but Sawyer was trying not to crowd him. Jayden had even spoken with him a few times. But Sawyer would still get that distrustful look in his eye. Nix hadn't earned the band's trust back yet. He ran off, disappeared for a year to get clean and sober. Heroin had her claws in him and it was either keep the band and his family or the drugs. Nix had to do it on his own, though, and that meant lying to them, leaving them.

Sure, they were happy to have him back but now that the excitement had worn off, they weren't sure what to do or how to act. The only time they were all in harmony were when they were playing. It was incredible to feel the music again, to be singing again. Playing with the band was the only time he let himself succumb completely to anything.

Jayden sighed. So it's going to be one of those discussions is it?

What do you mean?

You know, the one where you call me because you obviously have something on your mind but you don't actually want to talk about it. So I'm going to take a stab in the dark here and advise you to open up to someone of your choosing. Someone other than me.

Nix frowned but didn't interrupt.

I know it's hard to do but you need a support system and right now your friends don't trust you and you don't trust them.

That was a bunch of bullshit. I trust-

You don't, Jayden interrupted. If you trusted them then you would be having this conversation with one of them and not me right now. Look, you are all trying to make the old relationship work but that's not going to lead anywhere. You are a different person now. Show them that person. Let them get to know the new you.

He chewed on his lip as he walked through his apartment into his bedroom. He had missed a year of all of their lives. Even hiding out in the road crew in an effort to be close hadn't kept him well informed. Jason had a kid, Greer was living with his girlfriend, Sawyer and Darcy finally made it official and they had new management. When he was with them, Nix felt like he was always playing catch up.

But he hadn't considered how they felt around him. Nix at least had a line into the band and had gotten to hear the gossip and hear them play. They knew nothing of him or his location.

Once again, Jayden was a damn good voice of reason.

Yeah, ok, fine. I'll try.

Finally. Sense. You have it. Hallelujah. Jayden said dryly. I've only been telling you this for weeks.

Nix grumbled something unintelligible as he reached down into his hamper and grabbed the first clean shirt he saw. Something outside his window caught his eye. The woman from before was standing in her window, blind cord in her hand, staring at him again. When he met her eyes, a look of pure terror crossed her face and the blinds dropped.

A smile pulled at his lips. He was seventy-five percent sure she had no idea who he was. The apartment she moved into had been vacant for the last four months. He had gotten lazy with his privacy and tended to leave the windows open for fresh air and light. They were on the top floor and she had the only clear view at his place. He'd have to get back in the habit of keeping his curtains closed.

From the front of his apartment, a knock sounded at his door. He half expected it to be the woman again but the lock clicked open and Sawyer called out a greeting.

Gotta go. Sawyer's here.

Sounds good man. Let me know how the opening up thing goes.

Nix hung up and slipped the shirt over his head as he walked out of his room to meet his brother. Whenever Nix walked into a room Sawyer still reacted with a hint of surprise. Like, he couldn't believe he was actually here and alive. And that was completely his fault.

Nix would add it to the list of shit he needed to fix.

Hey, you ready? Sawyer asked. His little brother hid his shit well, had always been more of an adult than a kid. Although he could be overbearingly protective and let his emotions fuel his worry, Sawyer was logical and knew how to keep his emotions hidden. It used to never be that way with them. Sawyer was Nix's safe place and vice versa. He wanted to get back there with him.

Yeah. Sawyer started for the door but Nix didn't move. Hey, before we go can I talk to you?

A flash of alarm crossed his face. Nix really looked forward to the day when they all stopped doing that.

Of course. What's up?

Ever since he came back Sawyer had been asking him to move in with him. He didn't like the idea of him alone in some tiny apartment. But Nix needed to breathe and living with someone would drown him. Jayden, however, was right. Things weren't just going to go back to normal because there was no normal, not anymore. He needed to reintroduce himself.

Would it be cool if I brought some of my tools out to your place? I miss having a workshop.

Sawyer's brow wrinkled in confusion. I don't understand.

Shit, had he not said anything to him about his woodworking? Nix walked to the couch and sat. At rehab, I got into building things. Like furniture and whatnot. It, uh, let me concentrate on something other than the need. It's been a while since I made anything so I hoped I could set up shop at your place since I don't have space here.

Sawyer's face didn't change; he just kept watching him with that damn concerned look of his. Nix was getting itchy under his scrutiny.

So you won't move in but you'll move your tools in? he asked.

Nix nodded. Yeah, and I might be around at odd hours. I tend to need a distraction more at night.

That means you'll be around more?

And there it was. What Sawyer wanted all along but never came out and said. Hope was hidden in his eye. If Nix didn't know him so well he might have missed it.

Yeah, that means I'll be around more. That ok?

Will the garage do? I can build you something more private if you want.

Nix stood up and grabbed his keys off the counter. That won't be necessary, Eager Beaver. The garage will be fine. Come on, let's get going. Darcy will be pissy if we are late.

As they left, Nix caught a glimpse of Sawyer's smile and knew he had made a step in the right direction. He also couldn't help his eyes from drifting down the hallway to the new neighbor's door.

Chapter Two

After three days in self-served solitary confinement, Ruby had managed to peel herself off her bed and re-enter civilization.

Ok, so she wasn't exactly in civilization. The lobby of the building was empty but she had left her apartment and if she saw anyone in the hallway, she was going to say hi and smile. Maybe even with teeth. Not in a creepy way, though.

Baby steps.

Tomorrow, maybe, she'd even go to the grocery store. Ruby had had enough delivery for a while. There were only so many items at a pizza shop before it got boring.

She wasn't expecting to have any mail so soon after moving but it was the excuse she needed to get up and move. And now that she was here she was glad that no one was around to see her struggle once again with a lock. The damn thing wouldn't turn. It went in alright and then got stuck half way.

The front door opened and she looked over her shoulder at a couple carrying white grocery bags.

Ruby stopped struggling with her lock and gave them a smile. Hello, she said in an overly friendly voice.

They returned the greeting and headed down the hall. Once they were out of sight she faced the wretched mailbox again and glared at it.

I will not be known as the woman who can't open anything in this building, she told the lock.

You'll just be the woman known for talking to inanimate objects, a deep, familiar, oh so sexy voice said from behind her.

Ruby's stomach flopped over on itself. Oh god, not you. She turned, a strained smile on her face and confronted the man from 649. This time he had a shirt on but otherwise, he wore the same amused expression as he regarded her.

649's eyes crinkled at the corners as they went from her to the wall of mailboxes behind her. Well, here's your problem. That's my mailbox, he said nodding to the slim door her keys were hanging from.

Ruby blanched as she looked at it.

Twice. How the hell has she done that twice? This man, this incredibly hot man probably thought she was some kind of stalker. She wasn't though. She'd look, because a man like that needs looked at, worshiped and visually eye-fucked, but she wouldn't touch. Promise. Unless he asked her to touch his sleek hard body and then who was she to deny him that?

But this modern Adonis would not be asking her to touch. Even without the accidental stalking, she wasn't anything spectacular to look at. Yes, she had an hourglass figure but it was an average sized hourglass. Like, of all the hourglasses at the hourglass factory, she was just another one on the assembly line. No special details, no extra carvings, no colorful sand. Maybe her curvatures were a bit rounder than her fellow hourglasses. Her hips did seem to have their own zip code they were so curvaceous. Ruby was fit for her size. Well, maybe not after those dozen donuts yesterday...

Seriously, this town had a place that delivered donuts. A gateway to heaven right there.

What she was saying was that she was a certain guy's type. Not everyone found her curves appealing, which was a loss for them. Mr. 649 didn't look like a man who enjoyed her type. Hard, edgy, bad-ass and blonde seemed his type. Ruby was picturing a lot of black leather while she was more of a dirty brown cowboy boots kind of gal.

Well, she had been and then she wasn't. Ruby wasn't sure what she was anymore. It was complicated.

She was still staring at the mailbox. Ruby hadn't been able to say anything because there was nothing to say. The world before her blurred as she unfocused her mind. What was one more embarrassment on top of all she had suffered already? In the grand scheme of things, this here was nothing compared to what she had dealt with back in Texas.

Whoa, hey. I'm kidding, the man quickly said when he got a glimpse of her face. I'm actually down here. He pointed to the other end of mailboxes.

Kidding? As in, funny ha ha? She frowned and looked at him, the dark thoughts wafting away like a whisper. His words did not compute. It wasn't until he chuckled and slid his key into a door a dozen or so boxes away that her mind caught up.

Loosen up, Sweets. I'm teasing you.

I think I just had a heart attack, she exclaimed