Old Sins, Long Shadows

By PG Forte

Of all the mistakes Conrad Quintano has made, driving Damian away is the one that haunts him the most. He hates the fact that’s he’s hurt the man he loves more than anything. For the sake of the twins, though, Conrad and Damian parent as a united front, a challenge that grows more and more difficult with each passing year. And with Conrad in his weakened state after his kidnapping, it grows more difficult than ever to be around the one man he can’t have.

But an old enemy’s mission to create a dangerous new breed of vampire threatens the twins’ lives, and it’s now more important than ever that the estranged lovers put the past behind them, or everything they hold dear might be ripped apart.

Each story in the Children of Night series is a standalone story and can be enjoyed in any order.
Series Order:
Book #1: In the Dark
Book #2: Old Sins, Long Shadows
Book #3: Now Comes the Night
Book #4: Ashes of the Day
Book #5: Fallen Embers
Book #6: To Curse the Darkness

• Language: English
• Publisher: Macmillan Publishers
• Release date: Jul 31, 2017
• ISBN: 9781640630871

Book preview

Old Sins,

Long Shadows

a Children of the Night novel

PG Forte

This book is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents are the product of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously. Any resemblance to actual events, locales, or persons, living or dead, is coincidental.

Copyright © 2011 by PG Forte. All rights reserved, including the right to reproduce, distribute, or transmit in any form or by any means. For information regarding subsidiary rights, please contact the Publisher.

Entangled Publishing, LLC

2614 South Timberline Road

Suite 109

Fort Collins, CO 80525

Visit our website at www.entangledpublishing.com.

Select Otherworld is an imprint of Entangled Publishing, LLC.

Edited by Tera Cuskaden

Cover design by Fiona Jayde

Cover art from Stutterstock and iStock

ISBN 978-1-64063-087-1

Manufactured in the United States of America

First Edition May 2011

Re-released July 2017

Table of Contents

Dedication

Prologue

Chapter One

Chapter Two

Chapter Three

Chapter Four

Chapter Five

Chapter Six

Chapter Seven

Chapter Eight

Chapter Nine

Chapter Ten

Chapter Eleven

Chapter Twelve

Chapter Thirteen

Chapter Fourteen

Chapter Fifteen

Chapter Sixteen

Chapter Seventeen

Chapter Eighteen

Chapter Nineteen

Chapter Twenty

Chapter Twenty-One

Chapter Twenty-Two

Chapter Twenty-Three

Chapter Twenty-Four

Acknowledgments

About the Author

Also by PG Forte

In the Dark (book 1)

Old Sins, Long Shadows (book 2)

Now Comes the Night (book 3)

Ashes of the Day (book 4)

Fallen Embers (book 5)

To Curse the Darkness (book 6)

Discover more Entangled Select Otherworld titles…

Bittersweet Blood

The Way You Bite

For John. It’s highly unlikely we’ll be together for as long as Conrad and Damian, but I should be so lucky! Te quiero mucho.

Sins cannot be undone, only forgiven.

—Igor Stravinsky

"The love of man to woman is a thing

common and of course,

and at first partakes more of instinct and

passion than of choice;

but true friendship between man and man

is infinite and immortal."

—Plato

Prologue

New York City

Anno Domini, 1856

Vampires are nothing if not adaptable. It’s a survival skill; as crucial as fangs. Either you learn early on to blend in, to fold seamlessly into the mise-en-scene, to successfully pass as mortal, or angry mobs armed with torches and wooden stakes are likely to figure prominently in your sure-to-be-short-lived future. Conrad Quintano knew this as well as anyone could. Over a thousand years as one of the blood-drinking undead had taught him that nothing was so constant as change.

Still, some changes were indisputably harder to adapt to than others…

I’m leaving now. The slight hint of a tremor in Damian’s voice did nothing to soften the defiance implicit in his words.

Sprawled in his favorite armchair, Conrad opened his eyes long enough to cast a single glance in his direction. So I see.

His chin tilted proudly, Damian hovered in the doorway of Conrad’s study. He was dressed in somber black, his ankle-length traveling coat draped lightly atop his shoulders in deference to his injuries. In his hand he clutched a small, leather valise.

Conrad stared in consternation at the bag. He’s been packing for the past several hours. Is that single bag all he has to show for it? Conrad could only assume the rest had been stored in the attic, or boxed up so that they might be forwarded to him later. Not that any of it mattered—he could take the whole household away with him, for all Conrad cared. He closed his eyes again, blocking out the sight of his lover’s face, still stained and streaked with tears. I thought you’d already gone. He’d certainly delayed his departure long enough. The night was almost behind them.

Conrad…

Get out, Conrad replied wearily. What was the point of any more conversation? The time for it had passed. If Damian did not leave now, he’d be traveling during the day. He’d be risking sunlight, exposure, discovery, death. I swear he does these things on purpose—just to add to the grief he causes me. It was not the first time he’d had such a thought. I should have left you where I found you. If he had, then maybe now, almost four hundred years later, he’d be over the worst of his loss. Instead, it had only just begun.

You’ve killed it, you know. Damian’s voice throbbed with sudden passion. Everything. All the love I’ve ever felt for you… I didn’t think it possible, but now…I swear to you, Conrad, I shall hate you forever. I shall die with your name on my lips, cursing the day we met.

Enough! Conrad thundered, half rising from his chair and glaring furiously at him, the man whose love he’d cherished, whose life he’d blighted, whose flesh he’d ravaged in an unthinking rage. Will you be quiet? Get out of here. Now! How much more of this does he think I can take? How much more damage might I do to him if he stays?

When Damian still hesitated Conrad shifted his gaze, deliberately allowing it to settle on Damian’s injured shoulder. He lifted his lips in a sneer that exposed the tips of his unsheathed fangs and snarled, Or have you not yet learned your lesson? Shall I school you again?

Damian’s face blanched. Without another word, he turned away. The swiftness of the motion caused the skirts of his coat to swirl out around him in a manner that would have sent entire generations of vampire-loving romantics into a swoon, had they but been there to see it. Unfortunately, the effect was largely wasted on Conrad who was not the swooning type and felt only a grudging appreciation for the dramatic beauty of his lover’s exit.

And then he was gone. The beauty snuffed out like a candle. The pleasure Conrad had always taken in it destroyed. The slamming of the heavy front door half a minute later bore witness to his departure. Conrad winced at the sound, forcing himself to stay in his chair despite the sudden panic that hammered at his senses. Like a dying swan it beat at his soul, insisting that it was not too late. There was still time to catch him, still time to reclaim what was lost, what was his…what was gone.

No. Never. Hurry! Go after him. Now! Beg his forgiveness, if you must. You’ve every right to him. You’ve every reason to command his return—do so!

Conrad held his ground. For what purpose shall I bring him back? That I might kill him the next time he angers me? That would only result in even greater anguish.

Dark silence settled around him and was all too soon dispelled by the bright, insistent sound of birdsong, by the slow, inexorable march of daylight across his wall. It was only then Conrad realized that, for almost the first time in over one hundred years, the shades had not been drawn across his chamber windows in advance of the dawn. Light continued to spill in through the unguarded glass until he was finally forced to bestir himself.

Given the great disturbance of the night before, it was hardly surprising that no servant had dared to enter his rooms this morning. Those who hadn’t deserted him entirely were likely cowering in their beds praying that, for once, the myths might prove true, that the coming dawn might turn him to ash.

We really must give some thought to the idea of hiring a new staff, he decided as he reached for the velvet drapes. One made up of sturdier souls this time around. He’d have to make sure that part was clearly understood. He’d have to remember to tell Damian…

But no, he was forgetting himself. There was no we any longer and, in the future, he would not be telling Damian anything.

As he dragged the curtains roughly along their rods, he spared a single thought to the question of where Damian might have gone to find shelter this quickly, or if he’d found shelter at all yet. Perhaps he hadn’t. Perhaps…

He pushed that thought away, as well. It would not do for him to be thinking in this fashion. He could not bear it if he had to face each and every dawn of the next five or ten centuries wondering about things that were now beyond his control.

For that matter, to hell with the servants also. He’d close up the house and let them all go. He’d travel abroad. Perhaps he’d tour the continent for a season or two, or maybe he’d go out west. He’d heard it said, recently, that there was money to be made in California, and it was past time he began his life anew in any case.

Vampires were nothing if not adaptable. Had he not said so himself, time and again? So be it, then. He was Vampire. He would adapt. He would embrace this change, as he had so many others, for everything did change, eventually, did it not?

I shall hate you forever…

Well, almost everything.

As Damian’s parting words echoed in his mind, Conrad’s vision blurred. He had to blink several times to restore his sight. Only time would tell if they would be proven true, but Conrad did not doubt he meant them now—and why should he not?

What Conrad had done was unforgivable. True, he’d been goaded beyond reason by Damian’s decision to take up with another Lamia Invitus—a vampire who, like Conrad himself, had undergone the brutal turning intended to make them beasts and leave them broken—but did that excuse Conrad’s actions? Had he not just proved himself no better than any other of his vile kind?

Conrad pulled the final curtain closed and turned away from the windows. "Via con Dios, mi amor, he whispered. Wherever you are. And wherever you go I pray your God will protect you as I could not. But I, too, can swear upon forever. And I swear to you now that however great the time or distance you put between us, it will never matter. For I shall love you always, just the same."

Chapter One

Quintano House

San Francisco, California

Present Day

The cries of the damned echoed in the dark, bouncing off the stone walls of their prison until the entire cavern rang with the sound of their pain.

Shout all you want, the soft, malicious voice of their jailer mocked them. No one can hear you. No one can save you now.

Defiantly, Conrad filled his lungs to yell again. Hopeless or not, it was not in his nature to simply lie down and die. He would not give up. He would not give in. He would not—

Mid-thought, mid-breath, he paused, struck by the ghastly silence that had settled around him. He was alone. The others were gone. Their voices had all fallen still. There was no one left now, in this godforsaken place, but he, himself. Child of Night. Slave to the Hunger. Last of the Lost Ones…

Rage ignited in Conrad’s heart and the force of his fury ripped him from the nightmare. He sat up in bed, his fangs dripping with venom. The urge to kill, to rend, to feed, rioted through his veins. It took everything he had to restrain his inner demon, to assess his situation with all the rationality he could muster. Even then, he very nearly lost the fight.

He was overreacting. Damn it, he knew this! There was no need for the anger or the fear. He was a millennium removed and half a world away from the scene he’d been remembering. Those squalid, stone cells where so many of his comrades gave up their lives and where he himself had been stripped of his humanity existed only in memory. Ages had passed since he’d seen them reduced to rubble. The vampire who’d ordered them built was long gone as well. The sadistic fiend who’d sired and enslaved him, who’d once owned his very soul, could trouble him now only in his dreams.

He was free. He was safe. He was home. And, tonight, he was once again waking up alone. There was no one to kill, no one to fear, no one to love—no one at all—in the bed beside him. Just as well. Although the longing to reclaim his life-mate had lately become a near-constant ache in his heart, not even to spare himself another night of loneliness would he deny the truth. He was better off alone. Much better off. They both were. He was too dangerous to be trusted, too likely to injure anyone who might share his bed. He was too damn hungry.

There was an endless, gnawing emptiness in his veins that would not be denied. It was worse than the heartache, worse even than the unrequited lust that assaulted him day in and day out. He was always hungry now. Always. Hungry. Hungrier than he’d been in centuries. Hungrier than he’d ever thought he’d be again. And the need was generally at its greatest when he first awoke.

He needed to feed—badly. Hoping it might be time to begin, he cast his senses outward, past the heavy curtains draping his windows. The sun still hovered several inches above the horizon. The earth below still clung like a lover to the last, scant traces of daylight. No. Not yet. Lying back upon his pillows, he forced himself to wait for night to arrive and bring another warm October day to its knees. I’d be taking too great a risk if I went out now.

Once, not so very long ago, he would have decided differently. Secure in the strength a dozen centuries had imparted, he’d have confidently risked daylight. If he’d awoken feeling especially hungry, even a fraction as hungry as he felt right now, he’d have instantly gone out and fed without so much as a moment’s hesitation. Under normal circumstances, he would have counted the debilitating effect of being out before dark as no more than a temporary nuisance. It was nothing he couldn’t handle, nothing a good meal wouldn’t quickly put right.

But nothing nowadays was normal and for all his vast wealth of experience—the losses he’d learned to live with, the torments he’d been forced to endure—he could not recall anything as difficult to adapt to as his current situation.

The three weeks he’d recently spent in captivity, at the hands of a vengeance-seeking vampire, had drastically depleted his life-force, leaving him newly vulnerable to a host of dangers such as he had not had to worry about for a very long time. The hunger. The nightmares. The shortness of his temper. His lamentable lack of restraint. They were all related, all part of his body’s attempt to heal and regenerate. But in a world where weakness spelled danger they were also something he’d been forced to try and hide, even from those closest to him.

His only hope was to recover quickly—before his deficiencies became too noticeable to conceal. Before some power-hungry potential rival decided to take advantage of his weakened state. Or before he once again lost his too-tenuous hold on his self-control and injured someone he did not wish to hurt. His family. His friends. His loved ones. They were his first line of defense, his best protection and, at times, the only reason he had to go on living. At the moment, however, they also represented the greatest threat there was to his peace of mind.

Chapter Two

Julie Fischer opened the door to the mansion’s gymnasium and peeked cautiously inside, praying she’d find the room empty. She needed space and time to recover her composure, to work off some of the hurt and frustration she was feeling before she faced her family. She was hoping to be alone. She wasn’t. Marc and Damian were already there, their footfalls thunderously loud against the padded floor, blades slashing the air to ribbons as they fenced.

Quick, Jules, her brother called, sparing one swift glance in her direction before lunging at Damian. Grab a foil. Come help me kick this old man’s butt.

Their uncle laughed as he parried Marc’s thrust. "Ah, sí, sí, perfecto. What an excellent idea. Bring a blade for my other hand too, chica, I’ll take you both on at once. It’s been far too long since I’ve fought Florentine style."

Julie shook her head and headed for the bench press. Sorry, you boys are on your own. I’m not in the mood. I should have gone for a run, she thought, feeling even more sorry for herself. Not that running through the streets of a city teeming with people would have done anything to take her mind off her hunger.

She still could not believe Brennan had said no.

But I’m hungry, she’d murmured as she straddled his lap and leaned in close—close enough to run her tongue up the side of his neck, just the way he liked.

He drew in a deep breath and pushed her away, gently but firmly. No means no, he teased. Or maybe he wasn’t teasing? How was she supposed to tell? He’d never said no to her before today. In fact, as far as she could tell, he’d never said no to anyone before today!

She let out a breath and tried harder to rein in her impatience. Is everything all right, Brennan? You hardly touched your eggs. Maybe he was tired of her cooking. Maybe he was tired of her. Maybe he was just…tired?

He shook his head. The eggs were fine, but I told you, you don’t have to cook for me.

I like cooking for you. Besides, she did too have to. He was her responsibility. She’d told Conrad she’d take care of him and he had to eat, right? So, what’s wrong?

Maybe I’m just not hungry. Did you ever think of that?

Julie sighed. Terrific. So maybe he wasn’t hungry. She was.

Damian stamped his foot against the mat in a quick appello, calling a halt to his bout with Marc. Startled back to the present, Julie glanced up. Great. She groaned inwardly as Damian crossed the room, headed in her direction. Just freaking perfect. She knew that look in his eyes. She knew what was coming next. A little heart-to-heart with her uncle was so exactly what she didn’t need tonight.

Damian prodded her shoulder with the tip of his foil, nudging her to the edge of the bench and then seating himself beside her. "All right, chica, out with it. ¡Háblame! What’s happened to upset you? Don’t even bother saying it’s nothing because I know you better than that. It’s far too early in the evening for you to be looking so glum for no reason."

Julie sighed. I dunno. I’ve been thinking, Damian. Maybe I should move back in here again. Into the mansion, I mean. Would that be all right? As Conrad’s second in command, Damian was the proper person to ask such a question. As one of the two vampires who’d raised her from infancy, Julie was reasonably certain he wouldn’t say no to her.

"But of course. This is your home, chica. You’re always welcome here."

Home? Is that how she was supposed to think of this house she’d only first set eyes on three months ago? It was inhabited by a score of vampires—ancient, scary-seeming strangers for the most part—and maintained by a large staff of biddable humans, half of whose names she’d yet to learn. Nothing about it felt even remotely homelike. And yet… The sad thing was, once upon a time, that’s exactly how she had felt about it.

Right now, however, once upon a time seemed a long, long time ago. She bit back a sigh and forced a small smile. Okay, that’s good to know. Thanks.

So what’s wrong? Are you losing your taste for Brennan?

She shook her head. No. But I think maybe he’s losing his taste for me.

You’ve seemed happy enough staying in his apartment. Why the sudden change?

Do I have to have a reason? Can’t I just…want something different?

Damian smiled. "Sí. That goes without saying. Do you?"

Not really, she replied with a small shrug. I think maybe I scared him.

You did what? Marc broke off practicing his ballestras in the mirror to gape at her. You scared him, are you kidding me? Why, what’d you do, let him see you without your makeup?

Julie’s cheeks flamed. She glared at her twin. He was making her feel about ten years old. She found herself fighting an all-too-childish urge to stick her tongue out at him. "Thanks, Marc. That is sooo funny."

Marcus! Do not be so rude to your sister, Damian scolded, his expression softening again as he turned back to her. "What happened, niña?"

How was that rude? Marc protested. "She’s being ridiculous. What is this guy, some kind of world-class wimp? What’s he scared of her for?"

Damian’s eyebrows rose. "Why should he not be afraid? A little caution would be a sign of great intelligence on his part. He is only human, after all, and your sister can be a very fierce little vampiress. Isn’t that so, mi niña linda?"

Only human. Tears pricked Julie’s eyes.

Don’t you miss it at all? Brennan had demanded. As he glanced up from the omelet he’d been picking apart with his fork, he didn’t even seem to notice she had been speaking. Which only confirmed her suspicion that he hadn’t been listening, that he hadn’t heard a single word she’d said.

Miss what? she replied, mystified, and more than a little annoyed, by the sudden change of topic.

Brennan waved a hand. All of it. Food. Sunlight. Living a normal life. Being human.

Julie stared at him, caught off guard by the question, unable to answer honestly—unable to answer at all, thanks to the orders Conrad had drummed into both the twins’ heads; the order that they keep their past a dead secret. How could she miss what she’d never had?

No. Sighing heavily, Brennan returned to his massacre of the eggs she’d so painstakingly prepared. No, I can see you don’t.

Fierce? Marc laughed. Oh, yeah, she’s real fierce. You know why she doesn’t go out to any of the clubs anymore, don’t you? It’s ’cause she’s afraid some vampire might ask her to dance. That’s how fierce she is. You gotta get over it, Jules. All those years you spent bugging me about how I should embrace my true nature, now here you are afraid to do the same, spending all your time playing house with some human just ’cause he’s easy and you think you can control him.

¡Ya basta! Damian jabbed with his foil in Marc’s direction, causing him to jump back, out of range. "That’s enough from you! Go, now! Go…flunge."

Excuse me? Marc stared at him in disbelief.

Damian sniffed. "Your fleches need work. Go practice them."

Julie couldn’t help smiling. A flunge, a move that combined a fleche and a lunge, was more properly known as a flying lunge. Given Damian’s typically flawless manners, this was probably the closest he’d ever come to telling Marc to fuck off.

Feeling immeasurably better, she snuggled against the older vampire’s side. I love you, Uncle D.

I know. Damian wrapped his arm around her shoulders and gave her a quick squeeze. I love you too.

Marc returned to the practice area, shaking his head and chuckling softly, "Flunges. What next?"

Damian sighed. "Forget your brother, chica. Tell me what happened."

Well, I think we kind of… Broke up. No. She couldn’t say it. Saying it would make it too real and she wasn’t ready for that yet. She took a deep breath and tried again. I had a nightmare.

A nightmare? Damian stared at her, his expression alarmed. It’s not like you to be troubled by such things.

It is now, Julie thought, watching her brother as she said, I was dreaming about—you know. That night? In the caves? She’d been dreaming of the night they’d helped rescue Conrad. It was the first time she’d watched anybody die, the first time she’d ever had to help dispose of a body—if dispose was the right word to use for the simple act of dropping a match—and she sincerely hoped it would be the last.

She’d always heard vampires were more flammable than humans, but it was one thing to know this and another thing altogether to watch one of her kind go so easily up in flames. Violent death was not the kind of thing she was used to having to deal with and, vampire or not, she just couldn’t seem to get over it.

Apparently, neither could Marc. She watched as he fumbled his footwork then turned toward Damian, a scowl on his face. Hey! Are we ever gonna finish this? ’Cause, if not, I’m out of here. I’ve got places to be.

Damian glanced reprovingly at him, but after one look at his face the fire died out in his eyes. You too? he murmured sadly, shaking his head at them both. "Ah, niños, have I not already talked to you about this? You have no reason to reproach yourselves. You did what you had to do that evening. We all did. And, did it not all work out just as we’d hoped? We survived. We’re all fine now. It’s over—let it go."

Fine? Julie sighed. Sure we are. There were times when Damian’s black-and-white, myopic view of the world was more than a little frightening. How—and for whom—had things worked out? Vincent, the vampire who’d abducted Conrad and held him captive, was dead. Conrad had still not recovered. She was having nightmares. Marc, for all his big-bad-vampire posturing, for all that he refused to even discuss what had happened that night, could no more let it go than she could.

Not even Damian had walked away from the evening unscathed. Sure, he pretended the scarves and high collars he’d taken to wearing ever since were just the latest in a long line of fashionable affectations, but Julie knew better. She’d seen the marks on his throat, the souvenirs left by Conrad’s teeth.

There was very little capable of damaging vampire flesh, but the bite of the Lamia Invitus, never properly healed. Damian would carry those scars forever. For someone as vain as her uncle, how could something like that ever be fine?

Well, children? Damian pressed, gazing sternly at them both. Have I made myself clear?

Sure. Marc sounded no more convinced by Damian’s argument than Julie was. Crystal. Now, are we gonna fence or not?

"Un momento. Damian looked at Julie again. If that’s all this is about, chica, if one…bad dream…is all that’s troubling you, then I think you should not be so hasty to make changes. Leaving is not always the best answer. Why not stay where you are? Give him a chance to grow used to you."

I can’t, Julie insisted. I just…can’t. Things had gone too far for that. They’d both said too much. She couldn’t go back.

Ah. Damian nodded. I see. So, there’s something else you’re not telling me. What?

Julie sighed. Well, for one thing, he started asking questions.

What kinds of questions?

Why are you even asking me that? Julie frowned in exasperation. You know the kind of questions I’m talking about. The kind I don’t have any answers to.

Humor me. Give me an example.

Julie’s frayed temper suddenly snapped. Like, do I miss being human, all right? Like, if I had the chance to do it over again, would I? He thinks I chose this, Damian. He thinks I was given some kind of choice in the matter. He doesn’t understand—and I can’t make him understand—and now…it’s all screwed up.

Damian nodded, his expression somber. And what is it you’ve been telling him when he asks you these questions?

What do you think I’ve been telling him? Nothing! That’s what. Nothing at all. And it sucks.

She’s right, Marc agreed, angrily lashing the air with his foil. "It sucks big-time. How do you have a conversation with someone when you can’t even talk about the simplest things? Like, where we grew up or how we met Conrad, how long we’ve been vampires. And why the hell not, huh? It made sense when we were kids. Don’t tell people you’re not human. That was reasonable enough. Who would’ve believed us anyway? But now… Either they’re vampires themselves, or they’re someone who works for us and already knows what we are. And we’re still supposed to keep everything a secret? What the hell for?"

Julie sighed. "There is no reason for it. I mean, who cares? It can’t be that important, right?"

Exactly. It’s bullshit. Instead of getting to know anyone we’re still lying and stonewalling and shutting everybody out. I thought it was bad before but, in some ways, this is even worse.

Damian looked pained. I know, he murmured, almost crooning the words, his voice soft and soothing, the same tone he’d used when they’d come to him with their childhood woes. "I know it’s been a big adjustment for you both. I understand that. But, there is a reason for the secrecy and it is important—very much so. It is all much more important than you could possibly imagine. You just have to trust me on this."

He gazed at them almost pleadingly, but Marc looked doubtful and unconvinced and Julie knew her own expression probably mirrored her brother’s. Why was it so important? She and Marc had always known Conrad and Damian were keeping secrets from them, but what were they covering up? What weren’t they telling them?

Damian sighed. I’ll talk to Conrad again. I’ll see if he’ll let me tell you…something, just enough to make all this secrecy seem less odious. Will that do?

No, Marc answered. But it’s a start. He