Shades in Shadows: A Collection of Short Stories

By Dr. Usha Sridhar

The book presents a collection of eight short stories. The themes are diverse and reflect the myriad dimensions of life, and attempts to sketch the experiences of the protagonists. The stories build on the belief that while life's mysterious ways have left us all befuddled, its journey is rarely smooth or proceeds on predicted lines for many of us, often casting dark shadows on our efforts to take it in directions we favour. Sudden surprises, unexpected successes and disappointments seem to appear, like shades of grey within the black of the shadows. It is perhaps these shades that have made life exciting and worth fighting for. This collection titled as Shades in Shadows embodies the spirit of the glorious uncertainties of life.

• Language: English
• Publisher: One Point Six Technologies Pvt Ltd
• Release date: May 2, 2019
• ISBN: 9789352019021

Dr. Usha Sridhar

Dr. Usha Sridhar is an independent Network Science researcher and resides in Bangalore. Graduating with a PhD from the Indian Institute of Science, India, Usha spent several decades as a researcher in India and overseas and many years as an entrepreneur exploring applications intersecting economics, social networks, learning systems and analytics.Usha is passionate about poetry and short stories. She loves to observe the ebb and flow of life around her and weave them into tales and verses at times. The characters in her work hence have an earthy rootedness in a local milieu, but she often endows them a sensitive strength to defy traditional gender prototypes. Many of her works try to give voice to the travails, rising inner aspirations, unspoken fears, and simple joys of women in a diversity of settings.Her poems and short story contributions have appeared in Rate my Literature, Muse India, Spillwords and Efiction India. Her work has also appeared in several anthologies. She is the author of four books: three collections of poems titled Life Matters; Drenched in Reverie, Heightened Senses and a collection of short stories titled Women’s Corner.At a personal level, Usha loves travelling, is an avid bird watcher and an amateur photographer.

Book preview

1

MAGICAL WEAVE

Rohit was sitting in a well-furnished apartment, gazing aimlessly at the ceiling. Feeling despondent, he was drinking heavily to drown his sorrows. He was having hard liquor recklessly, wanting to numb the pain inflicted on him recently. He was not sure how to get out of his present misery. For once, he could frankly admit that he was the victim and not the perpetrator of the act.

Rohit was the only son of Vasudev and Lalitha. Vasudev was a reputed poet and litterateur in Delhi. He was a wellknown face in the poetry festivals and government organised cultural programs. During the many late night poetry sessions held through the years, many poets stayed back at his house for days on end. Lalitha played the perfect host on such occasions and took very good care of her guests. Though she was not a poet, she loved to sit in the poetry recital sessions.

Rohit not influenced by the environment that prevailed in his house, had a rather poor view of poetry and the field of literature in general. He became an engineer and an IT professional. Grappling with facts and data, he believed in arguments backed by cold logic that came out of mathematical models. When he was at home, he preferred sitting in front of the computer, rather than at the poetry gatherings, which he considered a sheer waste of time. His parents did not try to influence him or change his ways.

He went to the US to complete his post graduation in engineering, and later joined a major IT company. He chose the organisation that offered him the highest paycheck; he couldn’t care what work they assigned to him. He bought all the material comforts that money could buy. He played in the stock market to increase his savings. He was planning to settle down in the US shortly.

He had met and fallen in love with his colleague and she moved into his house. His parents were upset with him about this arrangement and wanted him to do the respectable thing, get married to her. He told them that he was not in a hurry, but that is what he would do eventually. He convinced them that they were serious and wanted some time to know and adjust to each other, before making the commitment.

Jane was a beautiful and sweet girl; she was popular in the office. She was a very social person and got along with people. She was sensitive and caring, putting other people’s needs before her own. She was conscientious about work and not an overtly ambitious person. Like many girls in the company she was attracted to the handsome Rohit; he was one of the most eligible bachelors there.

Rohit and Jane had a lovely first year together; they travelled widely during weekends and holidays. They made new friends and enjoyed each other’s hobbies. However, differences slowly started creeping in, as their generally contrasting views clashed. Jane realised that he was everything that she abhorred. He was self-centred, vain, arrogant, materialistic and ambitious. In every task, he undertook he looked for benefits for himself. She tried to communicate her apprehensions to him but in his typical style, he ridiculed her claims as wild.

In the meantime, a new colleague Mark had joined the company and she found a lot of common ground with him. They found their interactions pleasant and they liked each other’s company. She informed Rohit that if he did not mend his ways she might call off their relationship but he ignored her warnings.

One day she decided to act decisively. Rohit, I’ve something to say to you, I want to end this relationship, so please let us go our separate ways, Jane said directly.

You must be joking surely, but today is no April fool’s day! retorted Rohit.

I am serious; I had warned you several times on previous occasions, Jane interrupted.

What are you talking about? Rohit asked innocently.

Jane spoke extensively on the issues that had bothered her for a while. Rohit stared blankly at her without offering any explanation.

Rohit, I had brought to your notice the differences in our perception, she reminded him again.

You can’t break a relationship on some silly differences; grow up Jane, Rohit said angrily.

Well for one, I think that the divergence of views is quite serious. They merited some action from my side, in fact I think I have acted a bit late, reacted Jane.

I am sure we can fix these ‘differences’ you now see between us, said Rohit dismissively.

This arrogant attitude of yours is not okay with me anymore. I’ve said what I’ve to- so let’s act maturely and break up.

I bet that you would come running back to me; you cannot do without me, Rohit said indifferently.

If you are so confident then why worry in the first place, Rohit? Let’s see how this separation works out for us, Jane said. They argued for sometime before Jane called it quits and walked out.

Initially Rohit did not think much about the incident, confident that she would be back. However, that day never came; the weeks turned to months and then to a year. They met often in the office but she maintained a cool distance from him. He tried to engage her in a conversation but she was evasive in her replies.

One day he approached her and asked her to come back to him and she flatly refused. But why? he asked perplexed.

I have moved on Rohit. I have found my life partner and we are both very happy. He is what I was looking for. I am getting engaged to Mark next week and will be marrying shortly after that, Jane said.

Rohit pleaded with Jane to come back to him but he could not make her change her mind. Mark is just an average person, he can’t keep you happy, he said desperately. Jane walked away without replying.

Rohit had a hard look at himself in the mirror that night, but he could not find anything amiss. He shrugged his shoulders and dismissed the incident as a bad experience in his life. He kept himself busy at work and outside of it. He travelled extensively, reached out to his old friends, got interested in new hobbies. However, try as much as he could, he could not get rid of the sinking feeling that was threatening to overpower him.

One Saturday, while he was trying to drown himself in drinks, he got a call from his mother. Hell Mama, good you called. I wanted to tell you something, Rohit stopped. His mother was sobbing at the other end.

What is the matter, Mom? he asked worried.

Rohit, your dad had a heart attack, he has been admitted to the hospital. The doctors are not sure if he will survive this time, can you please come home immediately? she asked pleadingly.

Of course Ma, I will book the first ticket out of here. Do tell me what has happened? he asked anxiously.

"Your father had a minor attack a year ago, but he bounced back. The doctors said there was nothing to worry about, and that he would be fine. I wanted to call you home, but your dad was insistent that we should not disturb you. He did not want to bother you on such trivial issues just when you were starting your career.

Today he had the attack at home. Luckily, his friends and I were there when he collapsed. We rushed him to the hospital. He went through a long surgery and he is sleeping. Do you think you can come soon… I want you to be beside me during this ordeal? Lalitha asked.

Mom, I will book my ticket and call you back shortly. In the meantime, please be calm. You are a strong person; Dad needs you now. Please do not break down. From now on I will be in constant touch till I reach India, Rohit said. He spoke to his mother for some time to calm her down, but he was feeling far from okay.

He called up the doctors to get the latest updates on his father’s health. They told him that he had to undergo an open-heart surgery, as there was over 70% blockage in his arteries. However, it was too early to ascertain how he had taken the surgery; they would know shortly, they said. He had a long discussion on the type of medication given to his dad. They advised him to reach the hospital as early as possible. Promising to keep in touch with them, he hung up the phone.

He jumped into action; he got priority, as it was an emergency. He tried to keep calm throughout the flight. He was worried for his mother; she was very dependent on Dad. Dad was her strength; over the years, she had not done anything to become independent.

Rohit arrived home and caught up with the news from his mother, before he headed to the hospital. Mom, you look tired, please rest now that I am here. I will sit with Dad in the hospital, he said concerned about his mother’s health.

I can rest only when I have your dad home, she whispered.

This time after Dad recovers; I want you both to come away with me to the US. You have aged and require someone to take care of you, Rohit said firmly.

Your father would never agree to this proposal. He breathes and lives poetry; he will die a sure death if denied his daily dose. Besides he has a huge circle of literary friends here, they are in constant touch with him. They visit us or we go over to their place; your dad can never stay away from them. He is used to a different eco system, Rohit, she said, giving innumerable reasons on behalf of her husband.

We will discuss this at a later date, Mom. Our focus is to ensure that he recoups fast, said Rohit.

His father was still in the ICU, Rohit saw him briefly as he was resting. He met with the doctors and had a lengthy discussion about his father’s health. They explained their concerns to him and he promised to take the necessary precautions.

After two days, they shifted Vasudev to a private ward. That was to be his home for a few days. His doctors were keen to keep him under observation. Rohit and his mother took turns to spend time with Vasudev. Rohit generally came in the evening and stayed back with his dad in the ward.

Vasudev was showing signs of improvement so Rohit was surprised when his father said he wanted to talk to him on an urgent matter. Rohit was sitting with his father after dinner when his dad spoke to him. Rohit had to bend down and hear what Vasudev was saying, because his father’s voice was barely audible.

Son, I want you to take care of your mother when I am not there, Vasudev said slowly.

Dad, that goes without saying. Of course I will take care of Mom, I assure you. Why are we talking about it now? You are on the road to recovery and the doctor says you will be fine soon. All you require is a lot of rest; I will make sure of that, responded Rohit.

However, Vasudev seemed a bit agitated that day. He gestured to Rohit that he wanted to talk more.

Son, please promise me that you will take care of your mom. She is a simple woman; she does not know how to survive on her own. I know that I have spoilt her a lot, but I was keen to give her a comfortable life, he started to cough.

Dad, that’s enough, conserve your energy, you need all the rest now. Do not worry about Mom; I will take good care of her. I promise to keep her, in fact both of you, with me here on, said Rohit firmly.

Vasudev was exhausted with that exertion; he obeyed his son and went to sleep. He seemed to feel light; freed of a huge responsibility. His son’s words were what he wanted to hear before he bid his final goodbye to the world.

There was a lot of activity in the hospital room. Rohit jumped up with, What the hell? There was a crowd around his father’s bed. He rushed to see what the matter was. The doctor was talking in a low tone to the nurse. Why is my Dad’s body limp? Has something happened to him?" Rohit asked.

Sorry son, but your father is no more, replied the doctor in an even tone.

How is that possible? He was improving, that is why he was shifted to the ward, whispered Rohit.

He died in his sleep, responded the doctor gently.

Rohit felt dizzy and unsteady on his feet- when he heard the news. A nurse sat him down and gave him a glass of water. Rohit was crying like a baby, the doctor consoled him and chatted gently with him.

How did that happen, doctor? asked Rohit in a choked voice.

Some take the surgery well and others don’t, said the doctor.

As far as I remember, my parents wanted to donate their organs after death; however, I would have to check with my Mom. I need to meet her personally to convey the news to her. I am sure she would want to see the body first. We do not stay very far. Would an hour’s delay be okay? he asked the doctor.

I understand, make it as fast as possible, said the doctor.

Rohit had to wake up his mom to give her the bad news. When she collapsed, luckily the nurse who was there treated her. Rohit rushed his mother to the hospital so that she could have one last look at her husband. It took his mother close to a month to regain her composure. Rohit took a long leave of absence to stay back and take care of her.

Mom, I want you to come back with me to US, said Rohit. Her refusal to leave the place shocked him. I cannot and will not leave; there are too many memories that tie me to this place, she replied.

When Rohit persisted and refused to take a no for an answer, she stubbornly said, If you want to be with me, you have to move in here. I will not change my mind.

Seeing that his mother was very stubborn and was unwilling to move to the US with him, he decided to follow her advice and move to India, so that he could be with her. He quit his flourishing job and applied for an IT position back home, to start all over again. They shifted from Delhi to Bangalore where his new assignment was to begin. To his surprise his mother readily agreed to the change and, he asked her out of curiosity why she complied. That is the place where your dad and I spent our childhood and got married too. We had to shift to Delhi because he got his first job there, she said happily. Rohit was relieved that his mother had acquiesced to his request.

Rohit moved into a posh neighbourhood, that was one of the fastest growing areas in Bangalore. All the facilities were closeby and the place boasted of well-maintained parks and hospitals. It was exclusive; privy to professionals from the IT, finance and the medical field; and a good spattering of journalists, writers and poets from the literary world.

He settled for a flat; his mother would be safe and taken care of when he travelled on work. They took an apartment on the sixth floor as his mother wanted a good view from the balcony. She did not want to live on the upper floors, as she was worried that she might have to climb the stairs if the power facilities failed. He had to wait for a short period for his material to arrive from US to settle in. His mother took over the job of designing and setting up home. She was very happy with the locality and the apartment’s eco system.

Rohit, do you know that some well known doctors stay in these apartments? Yesterday when I took a walk down, I met a well-educated woman. She works for an NGO that focuses on educating girl children. She asked me if I would be interested in joining and I said that I would definitely consider it. What do you think, son? Lalitha asked.

Mom, if you think you can manage, why not? You would be preoccupied while I am at work. Besides, they seem to be doing some interesting and relevant work. What can be more important than providing educational opportunities for girl children, especially in India? asked Rohit, who was an advocate for girl causes.

His mother nodded her head, Okay I’ll consider it as a serious option then. She also introduced me to a few women who were with her. I believe they have a women’s group here; they meet regularly to organise various types of activities. Once a year they go on a trip leaving the men folk behind. This year they plan to travel to Europe for two weeks. I would love to join them too. They have a meeting this weekend, I plan to attend it. Lalitha announced.

Ma, that’s a big relief for me. I was wondering how you would manage in a new place. Now it looks like you might be busier than I would be! Rohit said giving his mother an indulgent smile.

There is something more I want to share with you about this place. They have a fantastic garbage disposal system here; more advanced than the system we followed in Delhi. I am quite impressed with the people I have met here; they are more aware and knowledgeable. Most of them are Internet savvy and are able to gather information easily from the net. Looks like women lead the activities here. They plan cultural programmes for children and for the rest on important national holidays

They told me that there is a well stocked library on the ground floor; I’ve to pay a visit there. They invite writers and poets often. I told them about your father and the reading sessions we used to organise. They are very excited to hear me read some of your dad’s work. I am keen to bond with some of the names they mentioned, Lalitha said animatedly.

Mom, by the way, you must be having some old friends who knew both of you here, isn’t it? asked Rohit, and Lalitha talked excitedly about some of them.

Rohit, can you spare sometime this weekend, I want to introduce you to some of my new friends? enquired Lalitha.

No Ma, it will not be possible this weekend. I am planning to go on a trek with my friends beyond Mysore for two days. Maybe some other time I will, responded Rohit.

One day Rohit was standing in his balcony and having his morning coffee. He looked around on hearing the jabber of children. Two empty plots next to his house were, temporarily converted into a basti for the construction workers to stay with their families. Two big houses were coming up in the street next to his apartment.

The children in the basti were amusing themselves. They were playing a ball game; a little girl grabbed the ball and ran swiftly towards the goal post. It looked like the entire crowd of kids were trying to chase and stop her from reaching the spot. However, she was deftly manoeuvring and avoiding them; even the big boys were unable to stop her. She seemed to be in possession of the ball most of the time. He gathered that her name was Vidya.

Vidya seemed a girl of 6-7 years with a bright face and a sunny disposition. She caught his attention instantly. She was enjoying the game immensely and was playing sportingly. Rohit could hear one girl complaining loudly that it was no fun playing with Vidya because she always dominated the game. None of us get an opportunity with the ball, she protested. Hearing that, Vidya immediately handed the ball to the girl and left the scene.

Vidya quickly found another sport to occupy herself with; a stray dog joined her in the new game. Together they ran after the butterflies, chasing them as she tried to catch them. The dog liked the game and gave her company; they ran around until they were exhausted. They finally sat on a stone to catch their breath. Rohit watched all this with amusement, from his apartment.

A woman came and handed over a crying child to her and asked her to take care of it while she was away. She did not give Vidya a chance to protest, but it looked like the latter did not seem to mind. The woman promised Vidya that she would return in half an hour. Vidya was a little kid herself who needed looking after, thought Rohit. He was fascinated with the way she played with the baby. The baby stopped sobbing and watched Vidya intently as she amused her. Soon some girls joined in and together they played with the child. Vidya sang and danced to the delight of the infant and Rohit too!

Rohit was purposefully striding towards his car, when he stopped, transfixed by the sight that he saw. Little Vidya was prancing around the car, touching and feeling it as she sped along. She mimicked driving the car around, horning to avoid obstacles in her path. She stopped her antics briefly to throw away a leaf that had fallen on the car.

The image on the mirror in the car distracted her attention. She took the help of a stray dog to position herself properly to peer into the mirror. Shocked by what she saw; she started screaming. Her mother who was close by ran up to her concerned. What is it child, did you get hurt?

Vidya covered her face and pointed to the car, her mother looked in that direction but found nothing amiss. What is the problem, Vidya? I can’t see anything untoward, her mother said crossly.

Vidya explained what she saw and her mother gave a big smile. Come along, let us see what you just described, she said.

Vidya once again peeped into the mirror and started bawling. Dear, that is your image, she said laughing. Vidya looked puzzled, how could she appear elsewhere when she was in her mother’s arms. To reassure her daughter that everything was okay, Gowramma now peeped into the mirror and asked her what she saw. That is you, Ma," said Vidya.

Gowramma explained about the purpose of mirrors in a car. Out of curiosity Vidya looked at herself calmly now in the mirror. She beamed at her reflection and waved to it. Rohit watched all this stunned- the little girl’s naiviety and innocence created a magical spell. It was an endearing moment and he was happy that he had witnessed this fascinating scene.

Thereafter, whenever she found the car parked at that spot Vidya would come and continue her magical tryst with the car. She would scrub her face clean, wear a nice outfit and preen in front of the mirror. One day Rohit caught her in the act from his balcony. Stay steady, she admonished the dog. She gingerly climbed up on him and looked at herself. Not content with what she saw, she pulled out her powder box, applied a lot of powder on her face and looked again into the mirror. She beamed happily; she was now satisfied with what she saw.

Rohit was as mesmerised by this little girl as she was with the car. Her spontaneous nature and her innocence were very captivating and he felt a deep sense of love for her. She was a happy child and enjoyed the simple things in life. She seemed to spread sunshine and warmth wherever she went. She did not let the poverty and filthy conditions under which she lived, bog her down. Nor did she particularly mind the fact that she wore the same dress for several days, walked bare foot, did not have a decent meal in a day or lived in a hut (that was her home). Nevertheless, she always found something interesting to keep herself occupied.

She loved her family dearly and was very close to them. They were always delighted to see their daughter when they came home exhausted after a hard day’s manual work. They indulged her by listening to her incessant chatter. How could she have so much to share with them, Rohit, wondered? He wished that he were privy to one of her chatting sessions.

He bought a long sized mirror and gave it to his security; saying, Please hand this over to them. That girl is standing with her father near my car. Tell them it is a gift from someone living in these apartments, but do not mention any names. I want to see the girl’s expression when she receives this mirror, said Rohit and the security guard grinned and nodded his head.

Vidya’s father puzzled by the gift refused to accept it. The security guard managed the situation very well, giving him Rohit’s explanation. The father grinned and asked his daughter, Do you want this gift? You can now see yourself in this mirror at home itself.

He placed the mirror on top of the car and showed it to her. Vidya leaped out of his arms and clapped her hands in glee at this sudden surprise gift.

One day Rohit walked his mother to her friend’s place down the road; it was close to a school. He told her that he would pick her up after an hour; he did not fancy meeting that woman. He told his mother to give some excuse to the woman on his behalf.

He was about to walk away when he caught sight of Vidya near the school. She was trying to peer into the school through the gate. The guard caught her in the act and came running to shoo her away. She pretended to walk away from the scene. However, as soon as the guard got busy with some other activity, she ran back to the gate to peer in again. She was so engrossed with what she was watching that she failed to see that the guard had sighted her and was coming to get her.

Did I not tell you to get out from here? he bellowed.

I am only watching from a distance, Vidya implored.

"Don’t you see that they are all busy? How dare you eye the children, they are not idling like you,’’ he came out and started belting her. The screams attracted another woman who was close by. Before Rohit could act, the woman ran up to the guard and talked to him. He let off Vidya after the woman took responsibility for the little girl.

The woman happened to be Gowramma. She got hold of her daughter’s hand firmly in her clasp and ordered her to come away with her. She was talking constantly to Vidya so that she could calm down. Rohit followed them from a distance to overhear what they were discussing.

Ma, why did you plead with that bad man? asked Vidya.

It is the duty of that man to guard the school from trespassers. If I hadn’t intervened he would have beaten you black and blue, retorted her mother.

But why did he do it Ma? Vidya asked innocently.

Because you can’t go into the school, reprimanded her mother.

He didn’t stop the other children from going in, why did he pick on me? Vidya wanted to know.

Because you didn’t pay fees to join the school, her mother told her, matter of factly.

Please pay my fees too, because I want to go in and do what those children do there, pleaded Vidya.

Your dad and I don’t have that kind of money to send you to school. Only rich children can go to that school, responded her mother.

What does being rich mean Ma? asked Vidya innocently.

They have a lot of money. Have you not seen those children in the evenings? They live in those big bungalows, wear good clothes, eat good food, and play with costly sports equipment. Their parents are rich and they can afford to satisfy all their children’s needs. We live in a hut and earn barely enough to survive decently, offered her mother as an explanation.

How did they get so much money to be rich? Vidya insisted on knowing.

They work in big companies that pay them well, snorted her mother.

But Ma, both you and Dad also work so hard every day. You go out in the morning and come back late in the evening so exhausted. In fact, I see the men go much later to work and come back early in the evenings. The mothers do not work at all; they are forever watching TV. Otherwise, they dress up and go shopping, only to return with many purchases, said Vidya.

Daughter, you are too young to understand the complexity of this world. When you are a little older, I promise to explain in a way that you will understand, retorted her mother exasperated.

But Ma… Her mother stopped Vidya.

That’s enough Vidya, chided mother. Seeing that her daughter was looking sad, she cheered her up by saying, I’ll cook your favourite dish in the night when I come back from work. Do you know you have come out of the house without eating anything; that is why I had come here to fetch you? I knew I would find you here.

If you don’t eat properly how will you grow up to be a strong girl? asked Gowramma.

Ma, I don’t want to be strong, I want to go to school like the other children. I want to do what they all do. I like the fact that they wear the same dress and take books to study there, said Vidya sadly.

There you go again child. None of the other children in the basti talk about school or studies. Why are you different from them? said her mother, rolling her eyes. Child, I am getting late for work. I have to go right away otherwise they will beat me up like the guard did to you, she said softly.

That had an electrifying effect on the girl. Sorry Ma, I’ll eat quickly so that you can leave, Vidya said. Her mother stopped to give her daughter a big hug, I am blessed to have a daughter like you, she said gently. The rest of the way the little girl scampered along with her mother, talking nineteen to a dozen.

What the little girl said shook Rohit’s conscience; she had woven a magical spell on him. Rohit wanted to go up to her and tell her that he would make everything okay for her and she could go to school and study, as she wanted. He knew he could not act on an impulse, besides she had her parents to look after her.

Rohit had taken a rather long walk to get familiar with his surroundings. He was quite lost, as he did not know how to head back home. He was wondering whether he should ask around for help when he sighted Vidya. He went up to her and introduced himself, My name is Rohit Uncle, and you are Vidya aren’t you?

How do you know my name? she asked suspiciously.

"There are flats next to your