Loved but Unwanted the Power Behind the Story

By Shirley Jordan

LOVED BUT UNWANTED IS A TRUE STORY ABOUT A WOMAN THATS LOVED BY EVERYONE SHE MEETS. BUT THE LOVE THAT SHE REALLY WANTED WAS THE LOVE FROM HER FATHER. BUT SHE COULD NEVER GET IT.
SHE FINDS OUT LATER IN HER LIFE AFTER HER FATHER DIES, WHY HE COULDNT GIVE HER THE LOVE SHE WANTED.
IT WAS BECAUSE HE WASNT HER FATHER AND HE KNEW WHO her biological father was.
HER BIOLOGICAL FATHER WAS THE BOSS MAN OF THE MAN SHE THOUGHT WAS HER FATHER.

• Language: English
• Publisher: AuthorHouse
• Release date: Nov 20, 2012
• ISBN: 9781477283592

Shirley Jordan

Shirley Jordan is an educator and author who has worked as a teacher, project manager, vice principal, and principal. She is the author of several nonfiction books for young readers.

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© 2012 SHIRLEY JORDAN. All rights reserved.

No part of this book may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted by any means without the written permission of the author.

Published by AuthorHouse 07/28/2015

ISBN: 978-1-4772-8358-5 (sc)

ISBN: 978-1-4772-8359-2 (e)

Any people depicted in stock imagery provided by Thinkstock are models,

and such images are being used for illustrative purposes only.

Certain stock imagery © Thinkstock.

Because of the dynamic nature of the Internet, any web addresses or links contained in this book may have changed since publication and may no longer be valid. The views expressed in this work are solely those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of the publisher, and the publisher hereby disclaims any responsibility for them.

CONTENTS

Loved But Unwanted The Power Behind The Story

Should I Tell

Becoming A Mother Figure

Losing A Child

Making A Change

Entrepreneurial

Conffessions

Heritage

I would like to

delicate this book to Umbre Nelson Jordan

Thanks for standing by my side when all the secrets were revealed.

I LOVE you

Loved But Unwanted

THE POWER BEHIND THE STORY

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Have you ever met a person who’s LOVED by everyone she’s ever met?

A person who will give her last, if she knew it would make someone else happy. Someone who treats everyone she meets, like a true friend that she’s known for a life time.

There was something truly special about this person. She could smile, and you could feel the LOVE she had in her heart.

With all of the LOVE and attention she got from other people, she still couldn’t get the LOVE from the one person that really meant a lot to her. The LOVE from one person that she tried so hard to please, and would have made her life so much easier to live, if he only LOVED her in return.

She sometimes wondered if it wasn’t for her wanting this person’s LOVE so badly, would she be the person that she is today.

It’s amazing how someone so unwanted could turn out to be the one that changes other people lives by showing them how much she cares about them.

It’s strange, how a small word LOVE, can make such a huge difference in a person’s life.

Is the word LOVE as powerful as people say it is?

Are people taught to LOVE or does LOVE come naturally?

Why do people need LOVE?

This is a true story about a girl name Sylvia and some of the things she remembers from her childhood.

The man she believed was her father always mistreated her.

No matter how mean or unfair he was to her. She always found a positive way to deal with her unhappiness. And that’s the power behind the story.

Sylvia was the youngest of seven children, and for no apparent reason, she was named Sylvia after her mother. Sylvia had three brothers and two sisters, and like her mother. Her skin was lighter than her other siblings.

Being lighter in complexion, Sylvia and her mother both were called, high yellow and red bone. Her mother was called BIG Red and Sylvia was called Red. Sylvia’s older siblings and friends called her Niecy because her middle name was Denise. At the age of two her mother and father whose name was Henry, divorced.

Her father was very abusive to her mother, both physically and mentally. He dated other woman and he didn’t care if Niecy’s mother saw him with the women.

Her mother was a beautiful country girl from Mississippi. She had a nice figure, big legs, beautiful long wavy sandy brown hair, and the most beautiful hazel brown eyes that turned colors depending on the color of her wardrobe, demeanor or surroundings.

Niecy and her siblings would all say they could tell what mood their mother would be in, according to the colors of her eyes. But mostly, their mother’s eyes were hazel brown with a touch of green.

Niecy’s mother was married once before to a man named Edward. It was an abusive relationship as well. She gave birth to two children from her first husband. A son named Freddy and a daughter name Cheryl.

When Niecy’s mother left her first husband Edward, he wouldn’t let her take their son. He said he would kill her before she took his first born son away from him. Knowing how abusive Edward could be. She knew if she took Freddy with her. Edward would keep his word and take her life. So she left Freddy with his father just to keep the peace, hoping to return later to get him back.

Niecy’s mother moved back home with her father. Six months later she met and fell in LOVE with another abuser by the name of Greg. She didn’t marry Greg because she was still married to her first LOVE Edward.

Greg was a charmer with a smooth personality and lots of money. Greg wasn’t a good looking man, but he had money. So he charmed his way into women lives.

At first Greg didn’t care about Sylvia being married. He liked what he saw and he wanted to be with Sylvia no matter what the cost would be. Their relationship went well for the first six months. Then Greg began to accuse Sylvia of sleeping with her first husband Edward.

A year and eight months into the relationship, Sylvia found out she was pregnant with Greg’s child. She didn’t know how to tell him she was pregnant because he already accused her of sleeping around. A month later, Sylvia worked up the nerves to tell Greg she was pregnant, and as usual, he accused her of being a slut and denied the baby.

Sylvia didn’t want to live with her father with a newborn baby and no job. So she moved in with her cousin Nadeen. Nadeen lived up the street from Sylvia’s father. So Sylvia didn’t have to travel between both houses. Later she gave birth to another son and named him Jerry. She gave the baby his father’s last name. She didn’t think it would be fair to name him after her husband Edward.

When Greg heard about the baby he went over to Nadeen’s house to see him. There was no longer any doubt. He knew he was the father. The baby looked just like him. He apologized to Sylvia and asked her to move in with him. Sylvia said no. Living with Greg would be like living her life all over again with Edward. They both were jealous men with bad tempers. But she did tell Greg he was welcome to come visit his son as often as he wished.

Greg would come around to visit his son and if Sylvia was not home, he would get upset. Nadeen would tell him Sylvia was out looking for work. So she could get her own place, but Greg didn’t believe her. He thought Sylvia was trying to find a way to take his son away from him. He told Nadeen that he gave Sylvia enough money to help out with her living expenses and there was no reason for her to be out looking for work. Nadeen told Greg that she understood how he felt. But Sylvia had two children and she needed her own place. The money that he gave her wasn’t enough money for Sylvia to get her own place with two kids.

Sylvia wasn’t sure how long Greg would continue supporting her financially. She knew if they had any disagreement, he would stop supporting her. So she wanted her own money. She was determined to find work and move into her own place. She didn’t feel comfortable living with her cousin and Greg coming over to visit as often as he chose to. He was making everyone in the house uncomfortable with his bad temper.

One day Greg came over to visit his son and Sylvia or Nadeen weren’t home. It was the weekend and he knew Sylvia wasn’t out looking for work. She had left her son with Nadeen’s older sister, Faye. Greg decided to take his son home with him. He said he was tired of coming over to visit his son and Sylvia wasn’t there. He took all of Jerry’s belongings with him and told Faye to tell Sylvia to come to his house to get the baby, when she came home.

When Sylvia came home Faye explained to her, how Greg came over and took the baby. Sylvia was very upset, but not with Faye. She knew Greg taking the baby would eventually happen. That’s the reason she was trying to get a job and move into her own place. She hated putting her cousin between her and Greg’s situation and she didn’t want her cousin to feel guilty about him taking the baby while she wasn’t home.

Here she goes again, another baby being taken by his father. When she went to get her son, Greg wanted to know what took her so long to come to get their son. She tried to explain to him, that she and Nadeen were out making groceries and buying things for the children. She said she left Jerry with Faye, just in case he was to come over to see him. Greg got upset. He didn’t want his son being left behind with different people. Sylvia told him that Jerry was her baby too, and she wouldn’t leave him with someone that she didn’t trust. She had no problem with Faye looking after her son, while she took care of things that needed to be taken care of.

Greg had a problem with it. So he forbade Sylvia from letting anyone keep Jerry except Nadeen. Sylvia told Greg that he couldn’t control her cousin’s house. She told him that she was doing the best she could, with what she had and that didn’t make her a bad mother. Greg told her. If she felt like that, then his son was going to stay with him. He said there was no way he was going to let his son be raised by a bunch of women. He said he would rather raise his son by himself, and he pushed Sylvia out of his house.

Sylvia didn’t have a choice but to leave her son behind. She decided to let Greg keep his son, while she continued to look for work and her own place to live.

Sylvia tried to move on with her life but it was hard. She would have to make enough money to get both of her boys back from their fathers and pay for her own place. She thought about getting back with Edward. So she could be with her son Freddy. She had missed out on so much of him growing up without her. Edward wanted to see if they could work things out as well. Even though Sylvia had another child by another man, he was still in LOVE with her. So they decided to give their marriage another chance.

Sylvia moved back in with Edward and within two months she became pregnant again. Edward got upset. He thought Sylvia was up to her old games. He said she knew she was pregnant before she came back to live with him. He wasn’t sure if the baby was for him or Greg. He called her a gold digger and told her the only reason she wanted to come back to him was because of his money, not because she LOVED him.

Sylvia was hurt. She did have a thing for men with money, but she was really in LOVE with Edward and the baby was for him. Edward let Sylvia remain living with him and her son Freddy until she gave birth to the baby.

It was a girl. Sylvia named her Cheryl. She looked exactly like Freddy when he was a baby. Edward had no doubt about his baby girl, but he just didn’t feel as close to her as he felt with his son. The marriage couldn’t rekindle, so Sylvia moved on with her life, taking her daughter Cheryl with her and leaving her son Freddy behind.

Even though she didn’t want to, Sylvia moved in with her father. She wanted to be close to both of her boys and living with her father was her only choice to be close to both children.

Several months passed and Sylvia met and fell in LOVE again. His name was Henry. He seemed to be a good man but he couldn’t read or write. He and his siblings didn’t get much schooling because they had to help their parents take care of their land and animal on the farm.

Henry had big dreams of leaving Mississippi and moving to Houston so he could make more money and Sylvia wanted to be part of those dreams. She felt as though she could leave her past behind and start a new beginning. Together Sylvia and Henry worked hard and saved up enough money to move to Houston. They moved into a two bedroom shot gun house in Third-Ward.

Third-Ward was a low income subdivision close to downtown Houston, where most African Americans got there first start. If you could make it in Third-Ward, you could make it anywhere in Houston.

Things were great at first. Henry was making good money and Sylvia was a stay at home mom, cooking, cleaning, managing the money, and paying the bills.

Sylvia became pregnant with twin boys. She couldn’t be any happier. She often thought about her two sons she’d left behind, but she also knew that she wasn’t financially ready to get them. She promised herself, one day she would go back for her sons. But until that time, she continued to save money.

Henry had been to Houston before. As a matter of fact, he had been to Houston many times. Sylvia found out much later about Henry visits. He began to bring other children around claiming to be their father. Henry had fathered four children in Houston and six children in Mississippi. Sylvia was heartbroken. She knew about two children in Mississippi. But the rest was unknown.

Now her dreams of getting her boys had to be prolonged.

She later found out that Henry was just a dreamer. He never accomplished any of his dreams. He shared the same dreams with each of the mothers of his children. Never accomplishing any of them, he was all just talk. Sylvia couldn’t believe she left two children behind to follow the dreams of a dreamer.

The other women called her the lucky one. But Sylvia didn’t feel lucky at all. She shared the same abuse all the other women talked about. She realized she made another mistake searching for LOVE.

What was it with Sylvia and men?

Was it because she dated men for all the wrong reasons?

Time had passed and Sylvia gave birth to her set of twin boys, Jim and Tim. The twins were very sick and so was Sylvia. While giving birth to the twins Sylvia passed away for two minutes. Doctor’s revived her, but she was in a coma for two months. The twins were premature and had to stay in the hospital with their mother. They were being taken care of by the nurses at the hospital. Tim was the smaller of the two. The nurse that took care of Tim fell deeply in LOVE with him and took him home. She didn’t mean any wrong doing, but the baby was so small and she had no kids of her own. She thought she could take better care of the baby while the mother was in a coma. When the nurse heard the news of Sylvia regaining consciousness she brought the baby back to the hospital.

Sylvia said she understood why the nurse took Tim. He was so small and cute. Sylvia shook the nurse’s hand and thanked her for the special attention she gave her son. Since the nurse didn’t have any children of her own, Sylvia asked her if she would continue to be in her twin’s life. Then she asked the nurse if she would be the twin’s Godmother. The nurse was flabbergasted. She accepted Sylvia’s offer. She told Sylvia that she would be the best Godmother the twins could ever have. Even though Sylvia didn’t press charges, the nurse was fired from the hospital and she lost her nursing license.

Two weeks passed and it was time for Sylvia and the twins to go home. When she returned home Cheryl was gone. Henry sent her to Mississippi to live with Nadeen, Sylvia’s cousin. When Sylvia called Nadeen to let her know she had made it home from the hospital and she could send Cheryl back home to her. Nadeen refused. She knew Sylvia was not physically ready for Cheryl and twin boys. Sylvia had just recovered from a coma. She was still weak and was trying to take care of twin babies.

When Nadeen didn’t send Cheryl home, Sylvia was devastated. She felt as though she was going through the same stage of losing another child. She didn’t understand why Nadeen wanted to keep her daughter away from her. She felt betrayed. Nadeen tried to explain to Sylvia how sick she was. She wasn’t ready to take care of three small children in her condition. Things calmed down and Sylvia agreed to let Nadeen keep Cheryl until she got her strength back. But Nadeen kept Cheryl a little bit longer than Sylvia expected.

When Nadeen did send Cheryl back home Sylvia was pregnant with her sixth child. She was carrying a baby on both hips and a baby in her stomach. During this pregnancy Sylvia met two of Henry’s brother’s girlfriends. Their names were Dorothy and Mary. Henry and his brothers were very close siblings. They would always do things together.

When the men were away, the women would sit down and talk for hours. They became very close friends. They were more like sisters, counting on each other when needed. It was good for Sylvia to know someone other than herself was going through the same abuse and trying to stay with the abuser. They were good hard working men. But they LOVED women, drinking and partying. It was strange for men that couldn’t read or write to keep a lot of women. But they did.

Months passed and Sylvia gave birth to a precious baby girl and again Sylvia was pronounced dead after giving birth. This time she was gone for eighteen seconds. Again she was revived and she and the baby girl Penny were released to go home a week later. She couldn’t find Henry, so she called Dorothy to come and get her and the baby from the hospital. Dorothy had Cheryl and both boys, Tim and Jim.

When Sylvia came home, she noticed Henry sitting in a car with his arms wrapped around another woman. It took everything inside of her to stay calm, because she had her kids with her and she didn’t want to cause a scene. She was a little embarrassed to have Dorothy come get her and her baby from the hospital while Henry was making out with another woman right outside her house.

Dorothy understood how Sylvia was feeling. After all, she went through the same situation with Henry’s brother. She told Sylvia not to worry about it. Dorothy said it was something in the genes that passed through of all the brothers whereas they abused the women they LOVED.

Sylvia couldn’t agree with what Dorothy was saying. She said it didn’t make sense and she couldn’t accept Henry’s behavior anymore. She had just died giving birth to his baby. And to come home and catch him with his arms wrapped around another woman was a little too much for her to accept.

Later that week, when Henry came home from work, Sylvia was cooking fried chicken for everyone. Henry had been drinking. He raised his voice screaming at her because he didn’t want fried chicken.