Leonard

By Carol Bardouille

Leonard was just eleven when he emigrated to England to join his family, leaving behind the island he loved. He had such hopes and dreams of his new life, but it was not be be and he could not understand why his family had made such a move. Leonard just wants to go back home to the sea and sand he left behind. Only spending time with Vicky and playing in a band can make him happy, but for the most part he just cannot settle in this cold damp country. Leonard finds himself involved in the wrong crowd and blackmailed into a drug deal that takes him to Jamaica, where he gets stranded and existing from day to day. Can he turn his life around and get back to his Vicky, and hopefully one day see his little island of Dominica once more.

• Language: English
• Publisher: AuthorHouse
• Release date: Jul 16, 2011
• ISBN: 9781463427979

Carol Bardouille

Although this book if purely fictional, I have drawn on experiences from my past to help me in completing this work, which I have wanted to write for the past thirty five years. I was born in England, married with three children. Emigrated to Canada in 1982 with my family. Lived for the past eight years in Barbados. This is my second book, my first being titled Angela. I am once more living in Canada to be closer to my five grandchildren. I enjoy working out and spending time in my garden. I also love to read.

Book preview

January 1961

Here it comes as it always does, every six weeks, a small dot in the distance that you can just make out and then as it gets closer it gets bigger and bigger until that’s all you can see in front of you, a great big boat. No not a boat, a ship. This ship The Emperor has taken so many people from this tiny island, and in fact my own village of La Piete, over the years since I have been old enough to stand on my own two feet and watch it come and go. Changing lives for people who go and for those who stay behind. Everyone is affected in some way by this ship’s arrival and departure at some time.

The ship took my father away five years ago and my mother two years ago with my younger sister. My brothers and sisters have also left at some time, either singularly or with their own families, husbands, wives and cousins. That left me and my Aunt Ellie, who is supposed to be taking care of me until my parents can afford to send for me. Well today it is my day and my turn and by this evening, I will be leaving my island like the rest and travelling to England with Aunt Ellie.

I am so excited to be going to England to be with my family, but I am scared to leave this familiar place, where I can wander barefoot all day long. The only time I wear my shoes is for school and then, as soon as I leave school, they are off my feet, and I am running along the beach close to the water, and jumping as the waves come in to see how long before my feet get wet. I stand and watch the sunset beginning and throw pebbles in the water with my friends and we see who can skim the water and whose pebbles bounce the most. Then I run home for a snack, change my clothes and I’m off to see who is up for a game of cricket. Cricket is my favourite sport. My Uncle Rui says I could bowl for the West Indies if I keep practicing hard. Well maybe now I will be able to play for England. I can just see me at Lords receiving my trophy for the best Captain ever, or the most valuable player, and everyone will clap and cheer both in England and here in my island and my village. I will be world famous.

Oops no time for daydreaming today! I have so much to do before I leave, my bag is packed but I have to say bye to so many people and listen to the old folk giving me advice, which I know I should be respectful and listen to, but to be honest, I can’t take in anything I am so excited; well excited one minute and scared the next. I have felt like this for days, weeks even, but today I just can’t believe it is actually going to happen. I am going to step onto that big ship and watch my island become a pinprick in the distance.

I can hear Aunt Ellie calling my name and I know its time. I pick up my bag, and head out the door. Just as I expected the village friends and family are out to watch me and others who are setting off to make it down to town to catch the ship. I can see the longing in some of their eyes; the ones who have their parents in England already and are waiting for their turn to be able to make the trip. I see admiration in the eyes of others, and I feel very brave, that I am setting out on this journey. I also see tears and emotion on the face of my Aunt May and Uncle Rui, and I feel very sad, because I know I will probably never see them again for a long time, or maybe never. Oh this is much harder than I had anticipated. I have seen others making this exit, and never realized how much turmoil it created in oneself and in the people left behind. Just as we are about to turn the corner, and I hope I can get my emotions back in check, my Uncle Rui calls my name, and I turn. He has his arms open. I drop my bag and run back into his arms, so strong; arms that have thrown that cricket ball to me, so many times. I also think of him as my hero, and today I look up into his face and I see tears in his eyes and he says a quick prayer over my head and asks God to take care of me. I don’t really care what anyone else thinks as I let the tears fall down my cheeks. I have waited for this day for so long, but now it is so sad to be leaving my friends and family behind, even though I know I have my parents and brothers and sisters waiting to greet me in England in three weeks time, it still makes me sad and my emotions are in such turmoil.

My Uncle tells me to get on or I will miss the boat, but it’s hard to leave his embrace. I wipe the tears from my eyes and pick up my bag and run to catch up with Aunt Ellie, who is stepping briskly down the road.

As we approach town, there are more people gathered on the sidewalks watching to see who is leaving this time. People shout from their windows when they see someone they recognize.

Good luck, they say.

Give my regards to the Queen! they laugh.

And on and on it goes all the way down to the dock.

Once we get there, the street is lined with people watching to see the ship fill up and depart. I recall how many times I have sat on this wall myself, and watched the ship disappear into the distance, with family and friends all going through the same feelings as I am today, I expect.

2

Finally the time has come and we are about to board the ship. My aunt tells me to stay close, so that I don’t get lost in the crowd. There are so many people who are making their way on board. I don’t need this advice because I am so scared; I am sticking to her like glue. But that’s my aunt for you; she has a habit of pointing out the obvious.

When we get on board the ship there appears to be chaos; people everywhere and no one seems to know what is going on. I follow Aunt Ellie, who seems disoriented and we appear to go round in circles. Just then there is a loud voice shouting Ellie’s name and both my aunt and I turn round to see a big bald man coming towards us. Aunt Ellie is obviously very happy to see this man I have never set eyes on before, but who is obviously well known to her, because he picks her up and spins her round and says how happy he is that she made it. I am a little puzzled by this as I did not know we were travelling with anyone else, but obviously my Aunt Ellie did because she was beaming and laughing back up into his face.

Just when I think she has forgotten I am with her, she points to me and says, Say hello to Luke, Leonard, he too is travelling to England.

Luke looks me up and down and then takes my hand and shakes it. Nice to meet you son, he says.

I want to say that the feeling is not mutual, but I know I have to be polite and so I smile and say, You too.

My Aunt Ellie expresses her concern that no one seems to know what is happening, but Luke soon puts his arm around her and tells her not to worry because he will take care of her. They stroll off together with me falling in behind, and I am very upset and afraid as it appears my Aunt will have much more on her mind than looking after me.

Maybe that won’t be a bad thing, after all it will give me lots of time to explore and the freedom to do what I want to, so maybe I should be happy that Aunt Ellie has a companion. I just wish she had not been so secretive about it; that’s what makes me nervous. I hate it when people are not upfront with you. Still, I suppose she did not feel she had to explain anything to me and there is nothing I can do about it, so I will just have to make the most of it until we reach England, when I will get to see my family once more and it will all have been worthwhile.

Just then an announcement comes that there will be a safety drill in five minutes and after that we will be assigned our cabins prior to setting sail. Finally, this is what I have waited for.

I am a little surprised to find after the safety drill, that I am not going to be on the ship with my Aunt Ellie after all. It seems that women are on one deck and men on another. I did not expect this, but my Aunt does not seem surprised. One thing for sure, I do not want to be sleeping anywhere near Luke. For reasons I cannot explain, I know I don’t trust him. Not that he has done anything to make me feel that way, but I just know.

I realize now that although I have seen this ship come and go for so long and other people making the journey, I never knew what happened once they were on the ship, as most people who left did not come back, so separate quarters for male and female did not occur to me. I thought we would all be together like one big happy family. Oh well… .

I think Luke had the same thought as me, because when Aunt Ellie asked him to look out for me, he shrugged and said Sure thing, but I knew he did not intend anything of the sort and as soon as Aunt Ellie went one way and we went the other, he made an excuse that he had forgotten something and would be back, but I did not wait for him and continued down to the lower deck on my own with all the other men.

I found a bunk and put my things on it. I am sitting there wondering what to do, when another man comes up to me and tells me to move. I am about to get up, thinking that I have done something wrong, when the man on the next bunk says, Stay where you are sonny.

I am not sure what to do, but the older man got up from his bunk and told the other guy to clear off. He must look threatening, because the man took off and then the older man said, That’s your bunk; don’t let nobody take it from you.

I nod. He then asked me who I am travelling with and I told him that my Aunt Ellie is on the deck above us.

He shakes his head and says, So I guess it’s just you and me then son. My name is Earl.

He held his hand out to me and I took it and shook his hand. He smiled and he looked very friendly, Anyone bothers you, just tell me and I will deal with them okay?

I nod and want to speak but no words come out. I swallow deeply.

So do you have a name?

Again I nod, but no words would come out. I took another deep breath and said, Leonard, but my voice is so soft and squeaky, Earl could not hear me.

What’s that, son? I can’t hear you.

I swallowed again and this time bellowed out my name, Leonard, my name is Leonard.

Well that’s better, good to meet you Leonard.

3

After getting my things sorted out and being sure that no one else was going to try to take my bunk, I decided to go up on deck and see what was happening. There is still a lot of chaos up top, but I notice the sailors are undoing the ropes that tie the ship to the dock, and so I know this is the moment I have been waiting for. We are about to set sail and leave this tiny island that has been my home since I was born.

As the Ship begins to pull away, people are waving back and forth and shouting goodbyes to each other. I too wave, not sure who to, but just in case anyone on the shore is watching me, I wave and wave until the people become little specks, no longer able to make out who is who, but still people continue to waive. Then the island itself seems to be shrinking until that too becomes just a speck, just like the ship when it is coming into the island; now the island is the speck. The sun is beginning to lower and soon it will be dark and my first night on board.

Suddenly, I do not feel so brave, and the tears are beginning to form in my eyes. I am very scared and all the bravado earlier as I walked from my village has disappeared and I feel very alone. I look over the side and the water is dark and looks scary. I wondered to myself, how deep it must be, and remembered the rules the sailor had gone over with us earlier before we set off. We even had to know how to get into the lifeboats in case of emergency. It is a scary thought, but lots of people have done this before us, so I am sure we will make it. I began to wonder what would happen if something did go wrong and my imagination was running wild. How would my parents feel, waiting only to be told our ship went down, or I fell overboard? I seemed to be mesmerized by the black sea and could not take my gaze from it, as my mind continued to dwell on what terrible things could happen at sea. Just then a hand came on my shoulder, and I jumped out of my thoughts and looked up. It was Earl. Now what are you thinking? Up here all on your own staring into the sea. You know the sea can draw you in if you stare at it too long. Makes you think all sorts of weird things. Why don’t you and I take a walk around the deck and head down and see what we are going to be eating for dinner tonight?

Earl steered me away from the rail and we walked along together, side by side, and made our way downstairs to dinner. I was glad Earl had rescued me from my strange thoughts and although I spent lots of time on deck, I was always careful after that not to stare too long at the sea, just as Earl had told me.

During those first few days on the ship, I felt very ill and could hardly keep any food down. Earl took care of me and got the Doctor to come and have a look at me. He told me it was just sea sickness and that I would eventually get over it. He told Earl to try and get me to spend time up on the deck. It will help him, he said. So every day Earl took me up on deck for some fresh air and eventually I seemed to find my sea legs and from then on things got much better.

I did not see much of Aunt Ellie during my three weeks on the ship. The first few days, it turns out she has