The Perfect Game: Jim Naismith Invents Basketball

By John Grissmer

The Perfect Game makes use of musical theater form to weave together two narratives. In the "historical" story, a young man out on his firs teaching job is given an assignment by his boss. Devise a new game for physical education students.

That teacher, James Naismith, fulfills his assignment and invents what he hopes will prove to be a perfect game. His students like to play what they call: "Basket-Ball." In the other story, two of today's basketball coaches, Nancy and Frank, have their own issues to overcome. They wind up coaching together while falling in love. The two stories are woven together when the historic Jim Naismith becomes a mentor figure for today's coach Nancy. They have some intense discussions over the true nature of basketball.

Both stories are resolved in the context of the final game, The Home Team against their Arch Rivals. Down by point, the Home Team's desperate last second shot, may or may not go in.

• Language: English
• Publisher: AuthorHouse
• Release date: Dec 12, 2008
• ISBN: 9781452071930

John Grissmer

John Grissmer has taught Theater courses at three major universities. GLORIOUS NOISE, his musical play about composer Charles Ives has been performed numerous times in Connecticut and New York. His other musical play, THE PERFECT GAME: Jim Naismith Invents Basketball has been performed at Xavier and Catholic Universities. He is also the author of THE GHOSTS OF ANTIETAM, a novel of alternative history in which U. S. President Hannibal Hamlin dodges civil war by making a clever political deal with Jefferson Davis. Published by Authorhouse. As a film maker he is the Producer/Writer of THE BRIDE starring Robin Strasser and John Beal, director of BLOOD RAGE starring Louise Lasser, and writer/director of the thriller classic SCALPEL, starring Robert Lansing and Judith Chapman. He thinks that HOW TO WRITE AN IRISH PLAY might make an interesting movie.

Book preview

MUSIC

(Bare stage, darkness. Lights come up on an expressionistic basketball goal. It rolls forward and looms into the light. Underscore: A first statement of a central theme. Two figures enter the lighted area in front of the goal. They carry headsets with microphones. They look exactly like what they are, sports broadcasters preparing to cover a game. Their names are PAT, a man, and BOBBIE, a woman.

Music Entitled

The Empty Floor plays as underscore

PAT

(Looking out into the audience)

This is the time I like best. When it’s all quiet.

BOBBIE

The calm before the battle.

PAT

Empty seats. Empty floor. It’s like the Opera before the singing starts.

(JIM NAISMITH enters. Dressed for 1891, suit, vest, mustache. He is a sturdy young man aged 31, open, and friendly, but seems a bit lost. He walks up to the goal and points.)

JIM

Ah, say, folks, can you tell me. How high is that rim?

PAT

Ten feet.

JIM

(Almost to himself)

Still ten feet off the floor.

BOBBIE

Been a lot of changes in basketball, but ya know, I think it’s always been ten feet ever since that guy invented it.

JIM

That guy?

BOBBIE

What’s his name? I always forget.

PAT

Naismith. James Naismith. Invented it way back in eighteen ninety something.

JIM

December 21st, 1891, to be exact. Springfield, Massachusetts, YMCA Training School.

(Holds out his hand)

So happens I’m that guy.

PAT

Oh, yeah? (Laughs) I’m Pat. This is Bobbie. I’ll say you look like 1891. That suit. That big old mustache. What is this? Are you an actor with the half-time show or something?

JIM

No, I’m Jim Naismith.

PAT

(Know it all)

Oh, a method actor.

JIM

Look, son, I’m just as bamboozled as you are. Last I remember was being asleep under a shade tree in my front yard, Lawrence, Kansas. Nice enough summer day. And the year was 19 and 39. Seems about all I do these days is sleep. I’m seventy-seven years old.

BOBBIE

You don’t look it.

(SHE takes a mirror from her bag, holds it up to JIM’S face.)

JIM

Well now, this is some kind of marvel. This is me when I was 31 years old.

(HE looks down at his body, then, surprised, HE dances a step or two.)

Now, if I could just figure out what I’m supposed to be doing here___

PAT

(Still kidding it)

That’s the great question for us all.

JIM

(Trying to connect the dots)

I saw a calendar out there in the lobby that showed what year this is. Good Lord! Let’s attack this as a scientific problem. Either of you ever take physics?

BOBBIE

I almost passed.

JIM

Then you know that anything is possible, because of the erratic nature of quantum particles and electrons. Professor Heisenberg in Germany has a theory about it.

BOBBIE

(Excited, remembering)

Yes. The Heisenberg Uncertainty Principle. I’ve heard of it.

(Underscore vamp intro to HEISENBERG.)

JIM

So tell me, where are we now?

PAT

The Home Team, indoor arena, today.

JIM

And where am I? Why I’m in 1939 and here all at once. How can this be? Why it’s simple. My electrons have got all scrambled up with your time frame. Some way. Somehow. In a process we don’t quite understand yet.

BOBBIE

I like the part about not understanding.

JIM

You just never can tell about electrons.

JIM (Sings:)

THE HEISENBERG UNCERTAINTY PRINCIPLE

With PAT and BOBBIE popping in at accent moments)

EEE-LECTRONS ARE THE CRAZIEST MATTER

THEY’RE IMPOSSIBLE TO SEE

SO THERE IS NO CERTAINTY

THAT THEY’RE SOMEWHERE OR ELSEWHERE OR EVERYWHERE AT ONCE

PAT and BOBBIE (Sing:)

What a bunch

JIM (Sings:)

Professor Heisenberg in Germany

Says electrons are such crafty clowns

Just when you think you’ve nailed one down

It’s got it’s coat on headed FOR the door

PAT and BOBBIE (Sing:)

What’s more

JIM (Sings:)

It never leaves a note to tell you

Where it’s been or where it’s gone to

Irresponsibility

Is perverse in it’s makeup

All (Sing:)

Makes you want to throw up

Professor Heisenberg in Germany

Says when you think that you can see

Location and velocity

That electron makes a fool of you

and pops off to dimensions new

And turns up in the universe

Just anywhere it pleases

PAT and BOBBIE (Sing:)

Sweet Jesus

ALL (Sing:)

Oh, sometimes they’re a wave

And sometimes they’re a particle

And sometimes they’re an article

That’S somewhere in between

And won’t behave with rationality

No matter how you try to be

Accommodating to