Exposed: A Real Life in Real Words

By Annette Russell

Exposed: A Real Life in Real Words began as a small project for author Annette Russells family and friends, but it became a collection of poems telling her life story. She wants them to know where she is in life and who she is; she wants them to understand her. She chronicles her ups and downs in her walk with God, and she explores her feelings and her personal experiences.

She describes how she strayed in her walk with God; she felt lost and alone, and the farther she strayed, the more she wrote. Her collection took on a life of its own, and the words began to set her free. The poems began to heal her by allowing her to see thingsburied things, painful things, everything!

Exposed is a blunt and heartfelt collection of poems that invites you into the heart and mind of a woman trying to find her way in life.

Untitled

Hes here, I know hes here hes everywhere.
He sees, I know he sees he sees everything.
He hears me, I know he hears me he hears everyone.
He knows what I need, I know he does he knows everything.
Hes in control, but I think that I am!

He loves me but I dont always believe that.
Hes using me but I cant perceive that.
Hes working on me but I dont deserve that.
Hes waiting for me but I cant find my way back.
Hes in control, but I think that I am!

• Language: English
• Publisher: iUniverse
• Release date: Oct 19, 2011
• ISBN: 9781462057009

Annette Russell

Annette Russell, a.k.a. Flowatress, is originally from South Philadelphia and now resides in Lebanon, Pennsylvania, with her three daughters. She is a licensed practical nurse specializing in pediatric home care. She is an avid reader who enjoys spending time with family and friends. Publishing a book of poetry is her personal goal.

Book preview

Contents

Acknowledgements

Shout Outs

A Word to the Reader

Introduction

My Life

The Beginning of Us

A Work in Progress

Between the Sun and the Moon

Finding Me

Give It Up

Footsteps

His Way

I Chose Him

The Joy Thief

I Gotta Know

A Work in Progress

Where Were You

The Comeback

A True Reflection

The Waterfall

Transformation

Just One

Premeditated

Karma Is Real

What Is Flow

Why I Write

A Work in Progress

Everyday

Father, Into Your Hands I Entrust My Spirit

R and R

How Are We Living

A Silent Night

The Forum

King of Pop

I Wonder

The Deli Guy

Life

Nasty Bad Habit

Still A Woman

A Work in Progress

Your Choice

Smoke Screens

Don’t Judge Me

Pause, Rewind, and Delete

Double Whammy

Charade

Keep It Movin’

Stand Up

Everything Means Something

Undefined

Ready to Love Again

A Work in Progress

Just a Tree

The Perfect Smile

Thank You

Raise Your Hand

A Letter to My Fathers

As You Are

Let Go

One Word, One Meaning

Untitled

The End or the Beginning

Road Kill

The Dark Side

Behind Closed Doors

Where I Am

Face-to-Face

Wait for It

Do You Have I.D.

Fresh Air

Comfort Zone

Uninhibited

The Lyrics

Black Dress

You’ll Know

When I Recite

I Am Being Heard

In loving memory of

Daniel H. Taylor

Sherrone Maddrey

Selena Petty

George Maddrey

You’re remembered and loved

by all who knew you

This book is dedicated to my daughters

LaJoy, LaShae, and Briana.

Each of you is an inspiration to me. Thank you for

never leaving my side. Everything I do is for you.

I couldn’t have done this without your love

and support.

Acknowledgements

First and foremost I have to give God all the praise and glory!

Thank you everyone at iUniverse: Ryan Allison, Leah Drichel, Krista Hill, and Amy McHargue. From everyone in the editorial services to the design team, thank you for bringing my vision to life.

Thank you for your love and support:

To my parents Stanley Brown and Frances Russell: Now that I’m a parent, I know first hand that it’s not easy raising children. And it’s harder when you don’t live in the same house. So with every ounce of love and respect: from my head to my toes, with all of my heart, to the very depth of my soul…thank you!

Dad, you stressed the importance of an education. You exposed me to all kinds of people. Instilled a solid work ethic, taught me good manners, and passed along your love for music. We burned hot dogs and I had more Zoo keys than anybody! LOL!

Mom, you maintained a roof over my head, stretched the dollars to keep food on the table and still managed to send me on trips. You made sacrifices, made sure the homework was done, and let me stay at the bookstore for hours! We watched old movies and listened to the oldies. You taught me how to fry chicken and it has made me very popular! Lol!

My stepmother Laura Brown, thank you for loving me like I was your own. I’ve watched you work, go to school, and take care of the family all at one time. Your words are always loving and with purpose. I heard everything that you said. You taught me to be a strong woman and it’s because of you that I’m the woman that I am today. I am truly blessed that God gave me you!

My siblings: Warren Smith, Kwadjo Agyiri, Ella Brown, and Jeanine Lewis. Thank you for your encouragement.

To my daughters: LaJoy Gundrum, LaShae Green and Briana Taylor. I am blessed to be able to draw strength from you when I have none. You’ve been supportive of my writing from the beginning. You’ve stood by me through everything. You’re my world!

My dog Sixer. Yes, I’m thanking my dog! He is very much a part of our family. He was at my feet while I wrote each and every poem. And even though he chews up my pencils, he’s cute and great company.

Ronald Leslie, my dear friend/brother. You kept/keep me sane! Regardless of what I’m going through you always assure me that with time, patience, a plan, and faith I can get me through anything. And you are right! Your wisdom is priceless to those who actually listen. I do and it’s paying off.

To my uncle, Harold Davis. I’ve been following you around since I could walk. When you drove a cab, I was in the front seat. When you practiced, you gave me drumsticks and a practice pad. When you relocated, so did I. You are a constant support for the girls and I. You always come to the rescue, even if you’re fussin’ the whole time. LOL!

My auntie Robin Workman. Thank you for never steering me wrong. I can tell you anything because you always understand. You keep it real and you’re funny as hell.

To my cousins: RaSheeda and Harold Pars. You keep me laughing! Thanks for all of the encouragement.

To my best friend Sherry LaShawn Owens. Words can’t explain what your friendship means to me. You’ve stood by my side through everything. Thank you for always having my back and being road ready. We take having coffee to a new level! LOL! I couldn’t have done this without you. Hustle & Flow 4eva!

To the love in my life James Kevin Carter. You are a breath of fresh air. You revived my heart and now it smiles! You put up with the mood swings and my deepness and never complain. You always encourage me to share my writing. BKS babe!

To my dear friends Eric and Sandi Macfaline. There are not enough/right words to express my gratitude. You held me down when I was on autopilot. Not many men would leave their house for a code red text, which means there is a mouse sighting! And not many women would share their husband! Thank you for everything.

To Vanessa Mama Owens, thank you for praying me through everything. You’ve supported me from the very first word. Your motherly guidance and love is greatly appreciated. As President