As Easy as Breathing:: Reclaiming Power for Healing and Transformation-

Poems, Letters and Inner Listening

By Margaret Dubay Mikus

Margaret Dubay Mikus, Ph.D. was a molecular genetics research scientist and taught college biology courses. After healing from multiple sclerosis in 1995, she began a poetic journal to "sing from the heart." "As Easy As Breathing: Reclaiming Power for Healing and TransformationPoems, Letters and Inner Listening" tells the moving story of her continuing healing through breast cancer. Using poems from her poetic journal, letters to her healing circle, and conversations with Spirit, Margaret takes the reader through a dark night of the soul and into the light beyond. This is about living deeply, healing body, mind, emotions, and spirit. She has already inspired many people to make positive life changes. Sometimes funny, always honest, graceful, and full of hope, this powerful, life-affirming book is particularly relevant in these troubled times.

WINNER OF A 2010 ERIC HOFFER AWARD (HONORABLE MENTION IN SELF-HELP/SPIRITUAL)

PRAISE FOR THE WRITING OF MARGARET DUBAY MIKUS:

"The multi-talented Ms. Mikus has a wonderful, magical, moving, humorous and inspiring journey to share. This will help anyone going through illness, not to mention their family and friends." Belleruth Naparstek, author of the Health Journeys guided imagery series

"[Her] 'from the heart' poemsare true forms of prayerthese poems are truly beautiful and inspiring." Rev. Ron Roth, healer, author and modern mystic

"From reading 'To Dance Is to Be,' I can see how such inspiring words can give people the power to battle through times of despair."

Lou Conte (founder of Hubbard Street Dance)

"This book is for everyone going through a healing processand that's all of us!It is so powerful and life affirming. What tremendous insights!"

Chris Belz, author, architect and poet

Beautiful readings of selected poems from "As Easy as Breathing" are found on her CD, "Full Blooming: Selections from a Poetic Journal" (also includes three original songs sung by the author) (at CDBaby.com, Amazon.com and iTunes)

More information at www.FullBlooming.com.

FROM THE PRESS:

From "The South China Morning Post" ( Hong Kong) May, 2006, beginning of an article on integrative healing:

"Many Ways to Get Over the Dark Days

When Margaret Dubay Mikusauthor of the book As Easy As Breathing, the story of her struggle and triumph over cancerwas diagnosed with breast cancer in 1996, her first reaction was one of fear. She had just recovered from multiple sclerosis the year before and felt betrayed and abandoned by the news, calling it the dark night of her soul. Armed with the experience from her earlier multiple sclerosis healing process, Mikus integrated conventional treatment with her own mix of holistic therapies, including yoga, hypnotherapy, reiki, expression through poetry, and jokes, backrubs and hugs with her children.She attended seminars on healing, formed a healing circle with family and friends, ate healthy foods and exercised. Mikus eventually healed from the cancer and now dedicated herself to helping others discover their full possibilities for life.... Eileen Lian, reporter"

• Language: English
• Publisher: iUniverse
• Release date: Mar 23, 2005
• ISBN: 9780595735631

Margaret Dubay Mikus

Margaret Dubay Mikus, Ph.D. received her Ph.D. in Microbiology from the University of Chicago in 1982. She worked in molecular genetics research at the University of Illinois at Chicago and taught a wide range of courses in the biology department at Lake Forest College. Her research on DNA cloning in Saccharomyces and Drosophila was published in scientific journals. Working with healthcare professionals, Margaret healed from multiple sclerosis in 1995, transforming her life. She began a poetic journal to "sing from the heart." She continued to study healing and began to use creative arts (poetry, music, photography, and story-telling) to help others. With this in mind, she designed a unique line of greeting cards, “Life Support Cards” (TM) combining her inspiring photography and poetry. She created and taught a series of workshops encouraging others to write, opening them to creative approaches to solving life problems. In 1996, Margaret was diagnosed with breast cancer. She refers to this time as her graduate course in healing. Writing her poetic journal was crucial to her healing process. Her first book, "As Easy as Breathing," contains selections from five years of writing: poems from her poetic journal, letters she wrote to her healing circle of family and friends, and her powerful conversations with Spirit. In 2007, Margaret recorded her first CD, "Full Blooming: Selections from a Poetic Journal" using poems chosen from "As Easy as Breathing" and her next book, "Letting Go and New Beginnings: A Mother's Poetic Journey" (coming in 2010). She also sang three original songs in her rich alto voice. This life-affirming CD is available at CDBaby.com and on iTunes. Margaret is a visionary poet, singer, photographer, healer, and story-teller. Her poetry has been published in journals and anthologies, and her photographs have been shown in galleries in Chicago and Lake Forest. Her poem, "I Am Willing" continues to be picked up by blogs all over the world as a spiritual meditation and life reflection. She met her husband in an English class at the University of Michigan in 1972. They have been married 37 years, with two grown children. For more info visit www.FullBlooming.com.

Book preview

As Easy as Breathing

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Margaret Dubay Mikus, Ph.D.

Writers Club Press

New York Lincoln Shanghai

As Easy as Breathing

Reclaiming Power for Healing and Transformation

Poems, Letters and Inner Listening

Copyright © 2002 by Margaret Dubay Mikus

Revised in 2005

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be used or reproduced by any means, graphic, electronic, or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, taping or by any information storage retrieval system without the written permission of the publisher except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical articles and reviews.

Writers Club Press

an imprint of iUniverse, Inc.

iUniverse books may be ordered through booksellers or by contacting:

iUniverse

2021 Pine Lake Road, Suite 100

Lincoln, NE 68512

www.iuniverse.com

1-800-Authors (1-800-288-4677)

Daisy photo credit: Margaret Dubay Mikus

Author photo credit: Stephen T. Mikus

Cover design: Margaret Dubay Mikus

ISBN: 0-595-23556-5

Contents

Cast Off

Preface

In Gratitude

Testing and Diagnosis

June, 1996

No More Need of Disguise

Remembering

(A Peaceful Moment)

Momentary Lapse

Lumps

I Come Back

I’ve Learned

What If

I Am Willing

Breast Test

Breathing

July, 1996

Communing With

My Troubled Breast

Please Do Heal:

The Endless Internal Lament

Inner Listening

(7/5)

Nothing into Something

More Cast Off

Idle

Inner Listening

(7/16)

Day Before Test Day

Good News/Bad News

Tacked

Declaration of Intent

Inner Listening

(7/23)

Late Night Conversation

with a Lump

Bearings

I Let Go of Fear

Surgery

August, 1996

Are You Somebody?

That Would Be Worse

To Ron Roth

Inner Listening

(8/8)

Escape

Why Have So Many Gone

August 10,1996

Dear Family and Dear Friends,

Crying Softly,

One Tear at a Time Slowly Trickling Down. Awakening… and the Cancer Is Still There.

I Am Willing to Release

To Behave

If I Do Enough

In Midst of

Peace, Love and Healing

Birds on a Line

I Filled My House

with the Sound of Loons

Shrink-Wrapped and Heat-Sealed

What Does It Mean?

Am I Like the Light

Yes and No

The Entire Story

Why

Should We

In This Place Which Seems

To S. B.

Surgeon and Father

Husband and Fisherman

Chemotherapy

September, 1996

Poison or Love Potion?

Opportunity

To Tiffany:

(This came out of your poem)

Inner Listening

(9/15)

I Don’t Find

I Know That:

Cancer Can Give You

Let’s Go

October, 1996

Allowing

October 6, 1996

Dear Family and Dear Friends,

Prayer of Lovingkindness

I Am

Bird Poop

Loss

Inner Listening

(10/12)

Back to the Living

Who Can Shine Such Light

No Matter

Flying

What’s In a Name?

Wisdom of the Grandmothers

November, 1996

How Much Crying Is Enough

Third Chemo

This Is the Day

A Wig Is Not Hair

As You Wish

Some Seeds Need

Ritual of Purification and Readiness

Yes

Who Was the One

Thank You to All

I Am… Fully Wakened

Radiation

December, 1996

The New I Am Now

Floating Between the Deeps

Float

We Are Not All Like Corn

I Am Not/I Am

To Face Your Worst Fear

Individuals

Hospital Hall

Christmas Cricket

Last and Best

I Asked for a Rose

January, 1997

As a Hammer Is Gentle

Many Have Listened

Easy Flowing

Fear of Burning:

A New Look

My Hair Is Coming In

I May Be Asked

Who Is This Woman?

The Balance of Opposites

If I Should

To Suspend Disbelief

February, 1997

I Am Afraid

The Rest of the Story

As Predicted

I Asked My Body

A Messenger

Turmoil

Sudden Faith

My Life

Five Days

Winter Morning: Looking East

And So Begins

Body, Mind and Spirit

For Those Who Might Be Fearful

How Do I Choose

Cancer on My Side

Landed on an Elephant

Recovery and Renewal

March-December, 1997

March 18,1997

Dear Family and Dear Friends:

The Richness of Being Human

There Are Times on the Edge

Reflections Before the Resurrection

My Outside Didn’t Show

To Dance Is to Be

(Thank You Hubbard Street Dance)

Unsolicited Message

What Does the Body Need

Fear

This Is the Moment I Have

So Many People Love You

Oh the Webs

For a National Day of Celebration

To Gail of the Bright Orange Socks

Power of Voice

Wipe Away

Birth of Night

Who Am I?

Sweetness

This May Be for You

Panel at the Wellness Center

Inner Listening:

While Going into the Pet Store

How Many

Fear Revisited

Reason

1998

Recovery

So It Seems:

From the Bottom Looking Up

Still You Know

(For Karen)

Promise

Let the Body Speak

From the Darkness of Apparent

Separation

With Gratitude

No-ness

As Easy as Breathing

Response to "I Don’t Know if I Buy

into the Whole Thing…"

Better and Better

The Tree of Scars

(After reading Time)

Call and Response

Building

Risk

1999

Expected

I Release

From Meditation

Sometimes I Have to Stop

It Is Simple

Pain

Stroke

For a Friend

Stay In My Truth

Meditation Class

Dedicated to L. and N.

After Lisel Mueller

Plan of Action

The Same Side

This Week Three Years Ago

Mouse

Gathering at HPH

(I asked and this is what came for you)

For All Dreamweavers and Midwives

2000

Friends/Not Friends

A Box of Any Size

Trust

Aware of Her at 13

Purpose

2001

Back Home

What I Have Done

Acclaimed Singer Jumps

To Live

Being Seen

After Deep Canyon

(At the Healing Journeys Conference)

The Day After

(9/12/01)

Petty Concerns Fall Away

(9/14/01)

Aftermath

(10/3/01)

Getting Ready to Leave

Melting of Illusion

Five Years Later

Notes

About the Author

Some poems included in this book have been previously published. Copyright of all poems remained with Margaret Dubay Mikus. Cast Off appeared in Daybreak on the Land, (National Library of Poetry, Owings Mills, MD, 1996). Back to the Living appeared in Best Poems of 1997, (National Library of Poetry, Owings Mills, MD, 1997). Cast Off, I Come Back, Idle, Why, Bird Poop, We Are Not All Like Corn, I Am Not/I Am, Individuals, I May Be Asked, To Dance Is to Be and Oh the Webs, 1998, appeared in Life Support Cards TM by Margaret Dubay Mikus. Promise, appeared in Poet’s Process: Favorite Original Poems of NAPT Members, compiled and edited by Nancy Scherlong and Lila Weisberger, (National Association for Poetry Therapy, 2000). After Lisel Mueller, appeared on www.healthjourneys.com, (website of Belleruth Naparstek, 7/2/01-7/9/01). I Know That, Flying, To Suspend Disbelief, Winter Morning: Looking East, Promise, Better and Better, Risk, After Lisel Mueller, A Box of Any Size, and the poems from Life Support Cards TM appeared on www.fullblooming.com (website of Margaret Dubay Mikus, 2001).

Cast Off

I am ready

to cast off

cast off coats

cast off cold

cast off the mask

of the outcast.

I am ready

to cast off

loose the line

rev the motor

slip into gear

and go.

Margaret Dubay Mikus

Preface

A Ph.D. in microbiology gave me self-confidence and training as an acute observer. Teaching developed my Voice and taught me to be a good writer. Both were superb preparation for being a poet. Looking back, I can see I was planning to write all along.

Helping others is my deepest need and my greatest pleasure. For years I’ve read my poems in my workshops and at poetry readings for groups of adults or children. I’ve also sent my poems to those who were facing difficult challenges and who needed hope and support. I am grateful for all the positive responses, which have encouraged me to continue on this surprising life path. These words might give voice to your experience, stretch your mind, nourish your spirit or make you laugh, a respite in dark times. I trust you will take what you need and let go of the rest.

This book is a powerful story of life transformation told through