Skepticism

By Daniela Elana

Haunted by the demons of childhood abuse at the hands of his father—a televangelist preacher. Eighteen-year old Adrian Luz is a militant atheist. When he starts his first semester at Yale University, he hopes to begin a new chapter.

After a Satanic ritual at his ex-girlfriend’s house, he is plagued with a horrific chain of paranormal experiences from menacing voices pressuring him to let them in. With their threats comes humiliation, each encounter jeopardizing his ambitions.

He seeks answers from a psychiatrist who diagnosis him with Complex Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder. Yet he denies the diagnosis as the root of his torment. Either he must learn to cope with his psychosis or shift his views before they decide for him.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Daniela Elana
• Release date: Jun 26, 2018
• ISBN: 9780463721278

Daniela Elana

Daniela Elana has a Bachelor's of Science in sociology and minor in biology from the University of Central Missouri. When she is not writing, she is researching or spending time with family and friends. She enjoys the outdoors and has a passion for animals, social policy and public health.

Book preview

SKEPTICISM

DANIELA ELANA

SKEPTICSM

Copyright © 2018

Daniela Elana

Cover design © 2018 by Hampton Lamoureux TS95 Studios

Edited by Sarah Chestnut

All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form or by any means—electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording, otherwise—without the prior written permission of the author and copyright owners.

The Characters and events in this book are fictional, and any resemblance to an actual persons or events is coincidental.

ISBN 978-1-7321695-7-9

Printed and Bound in the United States of America

First Printing June 2018

https://danielaelana.wordpress.com

DEDICATION

To my grandmother, Christina Moore.

You were salt and light to all you encountered.

Your near 81 years on earth spent encouraging

and teaching is a true blessing worth more than

silver or gold.

In loving memory: January 1933-2014

Acknowledgements

Writer’s block is something all writers fall prey to. It was my senior year of high school six and half years ago when I stated that I would never write again. My mother, Pamela who pulled me out of those blues, reminding me of my God given gift. Without her encouragement, I wouldn’t have made it through that dark period. I would also like to thank my illustrator, Hampton Lamoureux and copy editor and proofreader, Sarah Chestnut for working with me on this project with such a tight deadline.

Psalm 91 New International Version (NIV)

1 Whoever dwells in the shelter of the Most High

will rest in the shadow of the Almighty.

2 I will say of the Lord, "He is my refuge and my fortress,

my God, in whom I trust."

3 Surely he will save you

from the fowler’s snare

and from the deadly pestilence.

4 He will cover you with his feathers,

and under his wings you will find refuge;

his faithfulness will be your shield and rampart.

5 You will not fear the terror of night,

nor the arrow that flies by day,

6 nor the pestilence that stalks in the darkness,

nor the plague that destroys at midday.

7 A thousand may fall at your side,

ten thousand at your right hand,

but it will not come near you.

8 You will only observe with your eyes

and see the punishment of the wicked.

9 If you say, The Lord is my refuge,

and you make the Most High your dwelling,

10 no harm will overtake you,

no disaster will come near your tent.

11 For he will command his angels concerning you

to guard you in all your ways;

12 they will lift you up in their hands,

so that you will not strike your foot against a stone.

13 You will tread on the lion and the cobra;

you will trample the great lion and the serpent.

14 Because he[b] loves me, says the Lord, "I will rescue him;

I will protect him, for he acknowledges my name.

15 He will call on me, and I will answer him;

I will be with him in trouble,

I will deliver him and honor him.

16 With long life I will satisfy him

and show him my salvation."

PART I

CHAPTER 1

Adrian wound through the sea of gyrating bodies. The clammy air reeked of beer, marijuana, and sweat. Light streamed off the crowded living room walls.

I’m going to ask that girl over there to dance, his roommate Mario hollered. Mario drifted over to a lean, copper-haired Asian woman in a yellow wrap-front dress. She was in the middle of a conversation with a red-haired woman. Both giggled when he approached them.

Adrian turned away. He considered leaving the chaotic house party feeling out of place. There was nothing, nothing but blaring music and the good ol’e boys. If Mario hadn’t dragged him here, he’d be in his dorm binge watching Netflix.

His eyes landed on a girl with long, dark hair leaning against a wall, craning her head. She scrolled through her phone. Her strapless, white dress contrasted well against her olive complexion. When she glanced up, her deep-set sapphire eyes glimmered beneath arched brows on her oval face. She met his gaze and swished over.

Hey, she said. I’m Hadrea Verga, and you are?

Adrian Luz.

It’s nice to meet you, Adrian. Do you want to dance?" She batted her thick lashes at him.

Sure, he said, taking her soft hand. They chose a quiet spot in the corner of the room. She threw her hands around his neck, he held her slender waist, hoping she didn’t notice his palms shaking.

I love this song! she said, swaying faster. Her energy eased his discomfort.

The room suddenly erupted into laughter, reeling him out of paradise. He glanced back at Mario. The woman he had asked to dance was walking away with her friend.

Come on, babe! Mario called. Both women turned, looking him once over with a smirk.

I have a boyfriend, and I’m not interested. She flipped her hair, whacking him in the face. He seemed unfazed as he followed her like a stray puppy.

A tall man with short brown hair emerged from behind the pool tables, stepping in-between Mario and the women.

Belinda, is he bothering you? he said.

Sure is, Matt, Belinda said with a nod.

Sorry, man, I didn’t know she had a boyfriend. She agreed to dance before her alter ego kicked in.

Matt swung at Mario’s face. Ducking the first hit, Mario sprang up and jabbed Matt in the chin, but Matt pushed him into the pool table, knocking red cups of liquor to the floor. Spectators backed up and withdrew their phones to record.

Matt circled his arms around Mario’s neck and struck him. His nose bled, gushing over the front of his shirt. Although Adrian had only met Mario a day ago, he refused to watch his roommate get beat up by some frat boy.

He sprang out of the gathering crowd and caught Matt’s fist as he threw it at Mario.

Adrian, what are you doing? Hadrea asked from behind. A tall, golden-haired man wedged through the throng of onlookers and shoved Adrian.

Fuck off, spic! he shouted. His breath reeked of vodka, triggering a rush of memories of the beatings he would take from his drunkard father. Between the stench of the man’s breath and the slur, Adrian’s body grew hot with anger. He rained blows on the stranger’s square face.

* * *

The warm scent of roasted coffee beans calmed Catalina as she sauntered into the café, surveying her surroundings. At one table, a couple talked. Behind them a student sat with textbooks scattered across the cherry wood table. She identified him seated at a table in the back corner to the student’s right, fingering the rim of his coffee mug. He hadn’t seen her yet, but when he looked up, his dark eyes fastened on her. Blood rushed to her head as he met her gaze from across the shop. His trimmed, obsidian hair shimmered under the dim light. She stretched the corners of her face into a smile and approached the table.

It’s been such a long time since I last saw you. He grinned. The gravelly voice she had once loved was now a source of great discomfort. Have a seat, he said. Her chair squeaked as she pulled it out from beneath the table to sit across from him. How have you been?

I’m fine, she said, looking away.

How’s Adrian?

He’s fine, she said. Horacio clasped her hand from across from the table. Heat rose in her face, and she withdrew her hand.

Listen, Cat, I know you don’t trust me, and I don’t blame you, but I’ve changed a lot in these past five years. I mean, who are we to judge?

Her eyes moved to the bookshelf behind him. The bindings of the three books in a row read Hemmingway, Hughes, and Huxley. Three authors she had enjoyed reading throughout the years. When she didn’t answer, his speech continued.

I realize I was wrong, and I should’ve never hurt Adrian or you. Baby, can you please forgive me?

She tapped her fingers against the table top. I forgive you, Horacio, but I didn’t come to reconcile. I came because of Adrian.

* * *

Sirens wailed outside the house, and the crowd dispersed. Before Adrian could stop throwing punches at the bruised man, an officer grabbed him by the collar of his shirt and read him his Miranda rights.

Officer, these crazy guys tried to jump my friend, the light-haired guy said. I was only defending my friend Matt.

I don’t want to hear anything from any of you hooligans! The officer glared at the four men and with the help of another officer, shoved them into two cop cars. Adrian and Mario were in one car and the other two guys in the other. It was just his luck. His first college party and he had landed himself a night in jail.

* * *

Mario’s father bailed them out of jail. Mr. Vitali lived an hour away from New Haven. He was a tall, dark-haired, middle-aged man with a face that seemed fixed in a permanent scowl. Adrian squirmed as he sat in the back of a Volkswagen Jetta. Up front, Mr. Vitali lectured his son.

It was just a fight. Mario rolled his eyes.

Just a fight? Damn it, Mario! It’s always the same story with you! Mr. Vitali said. "I pulled strings to get you into Yale. I stopped you from joining any fraternities this year because I knew you’d try partying your freshman year away.

Yeah, I know, he said.

If it wasn’t for me, your lazy ass would be passed out high with those deadweight friends of yours. And you know they’re the reason I sent you away to boarding school!

And it didn’t fix a thing, Mario said, running his fingers through his light, brown hair.

When are you going to grow up? All you ever do is squander my money on booze and drugs.

What I do with my life is none of your damned business. Mario crossed his arms and pressed his head against the window.

As long as I’m paying your tuition, what the fuck you do with your life is my business. It’s a damned shame what you’ve become, Mario.

Adrian remained quiet and kept his eyes trained on the tinted window.

* * *

What is it you wanted to tell me about him? Horacio lowered his brows at her.

He went off to school and…. She held her sentence when she noticed his focus shift elsewhere.

A tall, slender woman who looked to be no older than their son skipped over to him. Her fuchsia dress clung to the top of her slender thighs and her honey brown hair swished as she moved.

Is this your ex-wife? She glanced at Catalina. Well, isn’t she a sight to see?

Catalina, this is my fiancée Jayla Thompson and Jayla, this is my ex-wife, Catalina Luz. The two women shook hands. Jayla glanced at Horacio and chuckled.

I’ll talk to you about Adrian later. Catalina rose to her feet with a swelling in her chest. Horacio nodded and diverted his attention back to Jayla. Five years, and he hadn’t changed.

* * *

Tortured screams resounded throughout the dark bottomless pit, but Adrian couldn’t pinpoint their location through the sweltering flames roasting his flesh. With quivering parched lips, he pleaded for mercy, but only a muffled cry resulted from his burning lungs. Amid the uncouth darkness, there was the thickening sound of footsteps as loud as a fleet of soldiers marching into Armageddon.

His limbs stiffened as he motioned to run. Then right before his eyes, a cloaked entity emerged. Its crimson eyes glared back at him as it snatched him by his neck, piercing his flesh.

* * *

Adrian recoiled from the shrill buzzing of the alarm clock, falling from the bed to the cold hard floor. The warm glow of the sun slowed his heartbeat. It seemed no matter how many times he dreamt about the beast; it still terrified him.

Glancing at Mario's bed, he noticed it had already been made for the day. He rose, fixed his sheets and got ready for his first day of classes.

* * *

He entered the spacious lecture hall scanning the room for a place to sit. Not a single face was familiar. Then he spotted Mario seated near the front and made his way over.

Hey, man, didn't mean to leave you hanging, but I wanted to get the front. I have to get at least a C in every class if I want my old man to keep paying for my phone and car issuance. Mario was bright-eyed and attentive, whereas he felt as if a bus had run him over.

It’s all good, Adrian said, reaching into his backpack to retrieve a pen. The pen slipped from his grasp at the sight of Hadrea’s long legs entering the room. His eyes moved up to her cleavage, peaking out of her floral blouse, bouncing with the stride of her walk.

It must be fate. I had no idea you were in this class. She plopped down beside him. The lilac scent of her skin assailed his nostrils as he scooped up his pen. Mario nudged him.

Speak of the devil, Mario said. Adrian's eyes moved to the door just as the two guys they got into a brawl with swaggered in with their girlfriends. They also saw them, and the light-haired one wrinkled his nose at Adrian.

Good morning and welcome to your first day of intro to philosophy. I’m Professor James Wellington. I know how thrilled you are. In this course, I challenge every single mind not only to think critically, but to question. Put aside your preconceived notions. Before we get into our topic of discussion, however I must follow the cumbersome procedures of going over the syllabus.

Mario and Adrian sighed. Every time Professor Wellington, turned his head Mario, would pull out his phone. Sometimes he would snicker at what he read on his newsfeed. Although he, was no perfect student, it was concerning to Adrian that it was only the first day of school and Mario was already distracted.

Professor Wellington finished talking about the syllabus with fifteen minutes to spare, and Adrian itched to leave. He hoped Professor Wellington would call it a day and dismiss class early rather than try to pass time with forced ramblings.

With the remainder of class, I would like to have a class discussion. Much of philosophy’s tentacles branch into religion. Some of you might be uncomfortable with this topic, but I’m not one to shy away from it like some of my colleagues. If that’s a problem for you, then you’re probably in the wrong class. He took a sip from his mug of coffee. The person of faith, no matter if they believe in Zeus, Buddha, Allah or even Satan thinks differently than skeptic who chooses not to believe in a higher power, he said. Adrian smirked. Since Christianity is the predominant religion in the West, much of my lectures on religion will be aimed at the belief in the monotheistic God of Christianity.

Mario turned to Adrian and raised his brows.

The first question for those who believe in a God is what kind of God would He be? A few hands shot up. Professor Wellington’s eyes scanned the room and he chose a girl from the sea of students. Please stand up, he said. She stood to her feet.

A just one, she said, staring Professor Wellington dead in the eye.

Oh, really. He moved to her side of the room. I must ask the age-old question. Why is there evil in this world?

God gave us free will, and sin came into the world through Adam and Eve’s disobedience to God. He never promised a world without suffering.

Okay, Miss, and what’s your name?

Adelina.

Anyone beg to differ? He surveyed the room. Adrian felt this would be his opportunity to express what had been buried deep within him for years. Standing up, he glanced at Hadrea as a broad smile spread across her face.

"You say, Adelina, that your God is just, gives us free will and evil is the result of a mistake mankind made? If He’s so just, why would He create a devil He knew would beguile mankind into letting evil into the world?"

It boils down to free will again. That goes for Satan, as well. He had free will in Heaven and because of his pride he fell from grace, which led to his influence in the Garden of Eden.

So, you believe in a magical garden with enchanted fruit and talking animals?

Yes, and why is that a problem?

Your beliefs are based on an archaic book that could’ve been written by anyone.

I trust that it’s an inspired work of God.

You need to stop believing in fairytales. You should’ve left them behind when you were a little girl!

A few students chuckled including Professor Wellington. By the way, Adelina rolled her eyes, he could discern the first hint of frustration. Yet it was in that moment that he realized her beauty. Her long wavy onyx hair flowed to her mid-back and her dark-round eyes appeared somber. Despite her level of attractiveness, however, her theology repulsed him.

"Young man, what’s your name? Professor Wellington said.

Adrian, he said. Adelina’s eyes lit up, like she had an epiphany.

Adrian, you think that the things of God are a fairytale? There are records of Jesus's existence! Take the shroud of Turin, for example. She moved her hands like a politician selling herself.

"Are there any records of Christ’s miracles besides your Bible? I believe in the real account of Jesus not the zombie version celebrated on Easter Sunday, which was an appropriation by the Catholic Church of a pagan holiday. The real Jesus was nothing short of a delusional cult leader," he said. Her face creased into a frown.

What proof do you have God doesn't exist? You can deny it all you want, but it doesn't disprove His existence. It’s beyond your level of comprehension since you choose to view the world from a strictly natural lens.

You expect me to believe some omnipotent being spoke and poof, things appeared and human beings formed from dust? If you read parts of the Bible, I'm sure I'm not the only one who knows it’s a load of bullshit. How can you expect an ancient holy book that has no original copies to be accurate?

It’s called faith. I know it’s hard for you to fathom, but seeing isn't always believing. Can you see subatomic particles? Yet they still exist?

Faith, you say? This is why Christianity will eventually fail because the only thing Christians are good at his forcing their beliefs on everyone else, he said. Her eyes watered.

Adrian, God loves you, and His arms are always open.

Whatever helps you sleep at night, sweetheart.

Adelina sat down beside a curly-haired biracial girl. The girl placed her hand on Adelina’s shoulder, and by the way they leaned in close to each other to whisper, he could tell they were talking about him.

Thank you, Adrian, and Adelina for participating in the class discussion. That’s all for class today see you all Wednesday, Professor Wellington said. Everyone filtered out. Adrian started to leave when the professor grabbed his shoulder.

Adrian, wait up, he said. Adrian froze and glanced at him. Professor Wellington looked to be in his mid-fifties. His ash brown hair was balding and he wore a pair of shiny thin-rimmed glasses.

Yes, Sir.

That argument you made in class was brilliant. I’m a fellow atheist and I just wanted to congratulate you on the in-class discussion.

Thank you, Sir, Adrian said, ambling out of the room. He caught up to Mario and Hadrea.

Man, you almost made that chick cry. You’re a deep thinker. I never considered half of the stuff you said. I didn't know you didn't believe in God, Mario said.

Yeah I don't.

Why not?

I just don't.

I don't know what I believe. I mean, I went to a Catholic prep school, but I never considered myself religious. All I know is there’s us, and apart from that there could be a God, Mario said.

Nice job today. I thought you were amazing, Hadrea said, stroking his black waves.

Thanks, Hadrea.

That girl that you debated with was so persistent like every religious basket case. People like her need to quit forcing their dogmatic shit on people, she said.

You’re right.

I know, she said. I’ll see you this evening, Adrian. She split from the group and waved.

He watched her disappear down the hall already under her spell.

CHAPTER 2

Adelina struggled to wrap her head around the class argument. She had met her fair share of irreligious people but this guy was beyond lost.

Don’t worry about him. People like that are better off in God's hands, Trina said as they walked down the hall. Adelina clutched her textbooks to her chest, thankful to have her best friend since fourth grade with her. She needed someone who could understand her, and she and Trina were polar opposites for judging people’s character. Both girls were practicing Christians, sharing similar values. Trina was judgmental while Adelina tried to give everyone the benefit of the doubt. To some Trina might even appear lofty, but she knew her well. They balanced one another out.

He’s so lost. Maybe God placed him in our class because He wants to use me to shed light in his dark world, Adelina said.

Remember what Pastor Flores said about missionary dating?

I’m not trying to date him. Her lips pressed into a frown. Trina rolled her green eyes.

From the tone of your voice and the way you go on about him, I think you have a crush on him. I don't think it’s appropriate to lead him to Christ, if your intentions are just to hook up with him.

He’s far from my type. He’s a cold, callous jerk who doesn't believe in God.

Right, tell me anything, Trina said, twirling her sandy brown corkscrew hair around her manicured nails. He’s cute. I’ll give him that, and I’ll admit his friend beside him even more so. But they're a bunch of heathens, she said. Adelina stared at her puzzled.

A little harsh, don't you think?

We shouldn't be unequally yoked.

We also shouldn't be judgmental, either.

You got me there…but you should still be careful.

* * *

I wish I had a girl, but you know what they say nice guys finish last. Mario folded his arms behind his back with his legs outstretched on his twin-sized bed. Behind him were posters of indie rock bands.

We just got here. The campus is crawling with babes, I’m sure you'll meet one, Adrian said as he got up ready to leave. Mario laughed

Thanks for false hope, man Mario said as he lit his vaporizer pen.

See you later. Adrian shut the door and left.

As he trudged to the park, he thought of Hadrea. Something about her was so rare and that something set her apart from any girl he had encountered.

* * *

Fifteen minutes later, he arrived at the park to find her seated on a bench alone in a white, North Face jacket. Her shiny hair was in a neat bun.

Hey, he said, approaching her.

You're two minutes late! she said. He glanced at his phone terrified that he got carried away talking to Mario."

I’m... sorry, he said, taking a seat beside her.

I was just messing with you. She nudged him. We haven’t had much time to just sit and talk, we need to get to know each other better.

You’re right, he said. She positioned herself to face him and crisscrossed her slender legs. Well, you know my name, what else do you want to know? He twiddled with his thumbs.

How about your life story, she said. He gulped

It’s too long.

I’ve got time.

* * *

Adelina maneuvered down the narrow sanctuary of New Life Church. It was the same church she and Trina had been a part of for years.

Adelina, a woman’s voice called. She could tell by the sweet sound it was Janae, who exemplified beauty inside and out, from her welcoming smile to her afro that coiled around her heart-shaped face.

I have so much to tell you about my first day.

Well, come, dear. Sebastian and I have plenty of time. She led her to the church office, and Adelina took a seat. Pastor Flores glanced up from the computer the corners