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Darmenzi
Darmenzi
Darmenzi
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Darmenzi

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One year ago, The Conqueror died, his plans stopped by three unassuming slubes. The happenstance hero Numer hoped to return to a quiet life after saving his world. He was even building the courage to admit his love to Cherry. But everything goes awry when an ancient demon is released from their prison and shatters the ancient crystal that had imprisoned them. Who would release a demon from its prison, though? A madman? A madwoman? Apparently!

As if that’s not enough, The Conqueror survived, and he’s taking matters into his own tentacles. Directly leading a band of ridiculous Mintop agents (his ranks reduced from his previous defeat), Conrad once more aims to take the ancient crystal to power his invasion force. Now there are three sides: one that wants to rebuild the crystal, one that wants to utilize its power, and one that wants to destroy it.

But not everything is as it seems. Just what is the extent of this demon’s power? And what’s with these giant beasts that keep appearing? Perhaps they hold some sort of secret. Perhaps Numer will go bananas (he's yellow enough for it) trying to solve that mystery. Whatever they are, one thing becomes clear: It will not be so simple to save the world this time around. A sequel to the book Slubes, the manic presenter Duth Olec once more pulls readers and narrator Wally Plotch into a high-stakes and humorous story with a returning cast of crazy characters and all-new faces.

LanguageEnglish
PublisherDuth Olec
Release dateJan 17, 2018
ISBN9781370545377
Darmenzi
Author

Duth Olec

Ridiculous author trying to write funny things that make you think, "I want to read more of this." A creator of bizarre worlds, creatures, characters, and ideas (I think that nails down all the noun categories) in the Cloudy Cuckoo Cosmos, another universe without an Earth. For that reason it is some type of Science Fantasy setting where things happen that probably don't on the Earth we live on. As I like to say, I want to be a professional author and then be unprofessional about it. In the context of the Cloudy Cuckoo Cosmos I, Duth Olec, left Earth for several reasons, kidnapped- errr, I mean, picked up a narrator by the name of Wally Plotch from his previous employer as it crumbled, and put him to work writing down these events. In the context of Earth, that hasn't happened yet. On my website you can read prog (in-progress) versions of past and future books for free. https://dutholeccuckooland.wordpress.com/cloudy-cuckoo-cosmos/novels/ I also have a Patreon if you are interested in donating; those who donate receive copies of my ebooks, so you can buy them or donate and get extra cool info about the CCC! https://www.patreon.com/dutholec There's even Cloudy Cuckoo Cosmos clothing. https://shop.spreadshirt.com/dutholec

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    Book preview

    Darmenzi - Duth Olec

    Duth Olec’s

    Cloudy Cuckoo Cosmos 2

    Darmenzi

    Presented by Duth Olec

    Narrated by Wally Plotch

    This book brought to you by the letter B, published by Duth Olec at Smashwords.

    All rights reserved. Lefts not reserved. No part of this book may be used or reproduced in any manner without written permission except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical articles and reviews.

    This is a work of fiction (depending on the theory of infinite universes, anyway). Any resemblance to actual events, locales, organizations, or persons, living or dead (and yes, that includes both living and dead events), is a coincidence. The fact that it’s a coincidence is also a coincidence.

    Edition 0.1 online serial publication: Released over April 1st, 2015 to November 1st, 2016.

    Edition 1.0 publication: Released 2018/01/17.

    Copyright © 2015-2018 Duth Olec and/or Jeremy Runyan

    Cover Art © 2015 Eli Bock

    Editor: Dawn Johnson @ Word Edge

    Duth Olec contact information:

    E-mail: dutholec@gmail.com

    Website: https://dutholeccuckooland.wordpress.com/

    Twitter: @DuthOlec

    Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/dutholec

    ISBN: 9781370545377

    With thanks to everyone who read Slubes and supported me in this crazy endeavor. I’m far from done yet!

    Table of Contents

    Introduction

    Chapter 1: Old Awakenings

    Chapter 2: Celebration Blowout

    Chapter 3: An Inferno Takes Flight

    Chapter 4: Metal Morons

    Chapter 5: Invisible Beard

    Chapter 6: Mystery in the Winds

    Chapter 7: Scrape in the City

    Chapter 8: Faulty Alliance

    Chapter 9: Hospitality to Hostility

    Chapter 10: Crazy Eyes

    Chapter 11: Flower Tower Devour

    Chapter 12: A Slight Change in Plans

    Chapter 13: Splash Smash

    Chapter 14: Solid Stone Will

    Chapter 15: Abandoned Electric Isle

    Chapter 16: Ending Maneuvers

    Chapter 17: Final Challenge

    Chapter 18: A New Truce

    Chapter 19: Dragged into Darkness

    Chapter 20: Fallen Oblivion

    Glossary

    Species Index

    Character Index

    Location Index

    About Some Authors

    Establishing connection . . .

    Please wait . . .

    Connection established.

    Updating Super Cool Text Chat Write a Story in It While You’re at It Program 2.0 . . .

    Connecting establishment . . .

    Please wait . . .

    Keep them waiting . . .

    Hambing the Burglar . . .

    Opening application . . .

    Opening your mind . . .

    Network ready.

    Chicken pot pie ready.

    Wally_Plotch

    Duth? Are you there? Some of the things the system is saying don’t look right.

    Duth_Olec

    Activating headlights . . . Cheesing the text . . . Cheesing the reader . . .

    *And starting the auto-text sound detection program apparently activated by voice. Why would I make anything in here activated by voice? I never talk. Except right now. Now I need some water.*

    Duth_Olec

    Welcome back. It’s the Cloudy Cuckoo Cosmos again! My name is Duth Olec, and this is a novel!

    Wally_Plotch

    Are you sure the system is working right?

    Duth_Olec

    I am your gravious host. That means I’m gravy. I mean groovy.

    Wally_Plotch

    It’s just that some of the start-up messages didn’t even make sense.

    Duth_Olec

    Wally, the dork who can’t understand what’s a joke, is the court jester– I mean stenographer.

    *Um.*

    Wally_Plotch

    Okay, all right, I can take a hint. I shouldn’t be surprised, considering all the jokes you make.

    Duth_Olec

    The characters of this novel have no right to remain silent. Everything they say can and will be used in a court of maw.

    Wally_Plotch

    Don’t you mean a court of law?

    Duth_Olec

    Nope, court of maw. The food court.

    Wally_Plotch

    Oh, I see. But we don’t have a food court.

    *chewing*

    Duth_Olec

    We do now. It’s way better than that Cosmos Court you used to work for. Maybe you can look at it sometime. Right now, we’re back to work for another tale.

    Wally_Plotch

    We’re off to document another story, then?

    Duth_Olec

    Yes! We’ve got to keep you busy, Wally, and the Cloudy Cuckoo Cosmos won’t disappoint on that front. You’re not writing testimony anymore like before; you’re telling the story as it happens.

    Wally_Plotch

    It’s quite a bit more exciting than my old job.

    Duth_Olec

    Until I showed up and doom followed.

    Wally_Plotch

    Er, yes, that was a bit too exciting. At least I’m not directly in the action now.

    Duth_Olec

    We hope.

    Wally_Plotch

    Hope?

    Duth_Olec

    Hey, readers! For those of you who haven’t read the first Cloudy Cuckoo Cosmos novel, Slubes! A Tourist’s Directory to a Slugalaxy, this might be a little confusing. I’ll give you the quick version.

    *rapid clacking*

    Duth_Olec

    TheCloudyCuckooCosmosisauniversewherethingscanhappenandinthisworldarethreeplanetsandoneofthemiscalledMintopandonedayitwasthreatenedbyaspaceinvaderbutsomenobodiesstoppedhimandIgotitallonvideoandtheninsteadofreleasingthefootageIjusthadWallyherewriteitalldowninabidtosavethenewspaperindustrybutthenafirebrokeoutandweallfoughtadragon.

    *Uh . . .*

    Wally_Plotch

    That’s not the quick version at all. It’d take someone far longer just to figure out where one word ends and the other begins.

    Duth_Olec

    It also turns out that writing without adding spaces is slower, too. You just become so used to spaces. So reliant on them.

    ALFALFA

    Parsing explanation . . .

    Duth_Olec

    See, no need to worry, our resident robot, Wally, will fix everything.

    Wally_Plotch

    I’m not a robot. You’re thinking of the Automation Low-Functioning As a Largely-Friendly Acquaintance.

    Duth_Olec

    Shh.

    ALFALFA

    The Cloudy Cuckoo Cosmos, a universe so like that of Earth’s, and yet so, so different. As real as the next, for a certain value of real. And next. It is a universe that sparkles with planets and suns and galaxies. Inside one of these galaxies floats a solar system with a trio of planets: Mintop, Derantu, and Zhop. On the planet Mintop resides the slube, yellow in skin, large in eye, and legless in tail. Unimportant in the large scale still, in the larger scale three slubes became important beyond the planet as they brought down a fierce intergalactic ruler, The Conqueror, destroying his space station and escaping the destruction. In the process they rebuilt a crystal shattered by The Conqueror in an attempt to take it for his own. This crystal surged with power beyond that which even The Conqueror understood. It had seemed like such a good idea at the time . . .

    Duth_Olec

    Yeah, that pretty much sums it up. One year later, it seemed like peace in their time. The problem with peace is it doesn’t stay long, and it never helps pay the restaurant bill.

    Wally_Plotch

    That metaphor doesn’t make much sense. During times of peace, isn’t progress—or, in the metaphor, the bill—much easier to do?

    Duth_Olec

    Hard work and things pay the bill. Chaos and strife show up and ruin the food, though. Peace leaves when this happens, no one gets any food, the check goes unpaid, and you’re stuck washing dishes for the night. I don’t know. I think it’s time we proceed with the story. Oh, but wait! I still have to explain the thought streamer to you.

    Wally_Plotch

    No, you don’t. You explained that last time.

    Duth_Olec

    But obviously you’ve forgotten how it works by now.

    Wally_Plotch

    No, I haven’t.

    Duth_Olec

    Basically the thought streamer lets you hear the thoughts of whomever you’re following so you can write what they’re thinking.

    Yeah, now you haven’t, now that I reminded you. Anyway, is everything up?

    Wally_Plotch

    Oh, yes. Video feed is running. Sound is on. I can hear the thoughts of an increasingly nervous crustacean.

    Duth_Olec

    Let me aim this at our focus of the story . . . Picking anything up?

    Wally_Plotch

    Something about a candy cane forest?

    Duth_Olec

    That’s him! He’s asleep and dreaming about board games. I admit, I never quite understood why. Anyway, time to type!

    Wally_Plotch

    Let’s do it.

    Return to Table of Contents

    Chapter 1: Old Awakenings

    Blink, blink. The world existed again.

    Numer stared at the black-cherry-red ceiling. He lay in his bed, the literal tail end of his long slube body sticking out from the woven grass bed sheet. He rubbed his soft, round, toothless snout with limp hands at the ends of thin, noodly arms. He looked around the dark bedroom. His first instinct to check the clock faded as his brain caught up with his life—it had been years since he lived in a town that used clocks. The pale blue sky outside his window showed him it was morning. Numer heard a few tweets of morning birds, as well as the occasional glob of an afternoon bird woken early like him. Very little sunlight shone in since the window faced east, and on Mintop the sun rose in the west. This prevented the sunlight from waking Numer him until midday. The sun wasn’t full in his eastern window. He shouldn’t be awake yet.

    He slapped his face. Now he remembered. He had become used to waking earlier due to being pestered awake by . . .

    Ugh, I want to go back to sleep!

    Numer covered his head with the bed sheet. He knew the clerpsonal wake-up call would come at any moment. He clenched his eyes shut. Any second that loud noise would come and she would . . .

    Numer peered over the bed sheets. Where was she?

    Come on, Numer, time to wake up! This shout, accompanied by a hammering clang-clang-clang!, burst through Numer’s window. He would always rather do without the banging, but even her voice felt like sandpaper on his nerves in the morning. Any other time she sounded melodious, but not when so loud and the first thing in Numer’s day.

    He sat up in the bed and looked out the window. There she stood: Cherry, wearing a red skesh, the loose tunic that covered from the chest to above a slube’s tail. Against that cherry red her sunny complexion looked vivid and smooth, as if it had never known a blemish. Her eyes were bright and sparkling, as if they could outshine the sun. Her mouth was round and supple, as if formed from a delicious soft pudding. Numer thought her beautiful every day, every time of day, even when she was banging a clay stick on a metal sheet to wake him up.

    Hello, Cherry, Numer said. He tried to smile, but his own soft slube mouth felt more like it formed a grimace.

    Wake up, sleepy-tail, Cherry said. You don’t want to be late.

    How many times have you woken me up like this now?

    Three hundred ninety-eight, Cherry said, smirking as if it were a joke.

    That’s a lot, Numer said, frowning in the face of a joke he didn’t get.

    It’s how many days are in a year, if you aren’t awake enough to realize.

    Numer’s big eyes widened. A year? Wait–Wait a minute, that means . . . Cherry smirked wider as he stammered. It’s the big day, isn’t it? In the stupor of his sleep he’d completely forgotten about the day’s celebration.

    I said you don’t want to be late, Cherry said.

    Right, I’ll be out in a moment. Numer squirmed over the bed. I just have a few things to do. I just need to– Numer yelped as he tumbled onto the grass-carpet floor, the bed sheet twisted around him. He grabbed the windowsill and tugged himself up until his round, squishy eyes could just see out over the sill. I’m coming, he said. Don’t worry about me . . . I’m fine.

    Cherry smiled and left the window. Numer fell back to the floor. His heart fluttered and he jerked his arms up across his chest. His heart wasn’t failing from lack of sleep, was it? He’d heard of that happening. Or was it something that happened to crawbers, not slubes? No. He took a deep breath. The fluttering was normal. It always happened when Cherry smiled at him.

    Numer jumped onto his tail and wogged—

    Duth_Olec

    Definition! Wogging: A slube version of walking that is not like walking at all because slubes push themselves along on their tails making all us leg folk look like chumps.

    Wally_Plotch

    Good definition to have.

    Duth_Olec

    Definition! Sleeging: Is to running as wogging is to walking.

    Wally_Plotch

    Sleeging hasn’t come up yet, but also good to know.

    Duth_Olec

    Definition! Uniformitarianism! The scientific principle that natural processes worked in the past the same way and rate as they do today.

    Wally_Plotch

    That . . . I mean, a good word, I guess, but I don’t think it’s relevant?

    Numer wogged to the closet. He threw on a skesh, but then he pulled it off. He carefully put on his best skesh, though he only had two, both blue.

    He pushed aside the slube-sized hanging leaves that covered the bedroom exit and entered a room lit by a round skylight. Below that stood a table on which sat a large bucket of water. Numer dipped in his hands and splashed lukewarm water onto his face, running his fingers around his eyes to wash away the night-accumulated gunk. Scooping some water with cupped hands he swished it through his mouth, expelling it with a splurt into a bucket on the floor. He prodded the spit bucket with his tail. It was nearly full; he would have to toss it out soon. Tomorrow. He’d do it tomorrow. At the moment, Cherry was waiting for him.

    Numer hurried out the washroom to the front door. He felt anxious to start the day but it was mixed with a new eagerness. How could he have forgotten? Today was the big celebration! Today was one year after they had defeated Conrad the Conqueror and saved their planet, Mintop. Numer opened the front door to Nottle and breathed deeply the warm, salt-tinged ocean air.

    Today’s the day I’ll finally tell Cherry I love her.

    Nottle was a village not even a quarter-mile across on the western peninsula of the island Hackney. A thick, ticklish cushion of soft, wavy grass covered the ground on most of the island. When the wind blew it about, it looked like it came from a dream. Ninety-one slubes called Nottle home and had put their hearts into rebuilding it after the disaster

    Hard to imagine that just one year ago devastation had rained down on the village.

    From the front of his house, Numer could see all of Nottle over the flat land. To the right, a row of clay houses lined the eastern and northern edges of town. Although Nottle’s houses looked much the same as they have always looked, they had been built and rebuilt many times over thousands of years; by now the only original structure of ancient Nottle was an underground shelter.

    Beyond the town, on all sides but east, rolled a pale magenta ocean. To the east there was a sea of green leaves and rainbow fruits atop the sturdy goldenrod trunks of trees making up the community’s orchard farm. The ripe fruits were picked and stored in six clay-walled storehouses at the southwest side of Nottle, also rebuilt from the destruction that had fallen a year ago. The town stored all supplies in these structures—fruit, fresh water, building clay, leaves, grass, air . . . although air was also available outside the storehouses and pretty much everywhere on the planet.

    On a small isle in southern Nottle stood a tall house twice the size of the other houses. This was the home of the merag, the town’s leader, whose overly ornate house stood as a reminder, at least in Numer’s mind, that simple was better.

    In the center of town stood a dark crystal as tall as a slube. A symbol of, well, if anything, nobody actually understanding things. It had stood in Nottle longer than anyone remembered and no one knew why, what it was made of, or where it came from. Yet powerful energy contained inside it had made Nottle a prime target one year ago.

    Numer saw the slubes of Nottle wogging about, some carrying fruits and wooden planks. Most of them clustered around a new structure in the north side of town, a wooden platform at least half as wide as a house. Wood had been imported from Gelago City in the east. It was a stage around which Nottle’s slubes would gather for the grand celebration.

    One year ago, Numer, Cherry, and Professor Zeth had risked their lives to rebuild the crystal, save Nottle and the world, and defeat Conrad the Conqueror.

    The Conqueror. Someone Numer would be glad not to see again. Conrad had been an invader from outer space, a ruthless ruler of many worlds who was vanquished by three ordinary slubes. Numer put that awful alien out of his mind. Today was a day for happy thoughts, and that left no room for Conrad.

    Numer headed to the stage. Along the way, slubes greeted him with tidings of the morning. Some joked that it was the earliest he’d ever been up; others congratulated him for being honored. Numer saw Cherry on the stage and hurried to meet with her.

    Hi, Numer! A short slube girl jumped out in front of Numer, causing him to yelp and stumble back. Isn’t it a wonderful morning? she asked, arms up in the air.

    Good morning, Gern, Numer said, catching his breath. That crazy friend of Cherry’s liked to jump out and startle him. She must have gotten a lot of joy out of it. Numer sure didn’t.

    With a bright smile on her smudged yellow face, Gern said, The sky’s bright and beautiful, the ocean sparkles like candy, and Paige wants to complain to you.

    I do not, said a taller slube girl standing a few tail-lengths away, arms crossed. I just want to congratulate him on going an entire year without saying anything.

    Numer tilted his head. What do you mean? He never knew what either of them meant. Gern was crazy, and Paige said everything except what she meant.

    Oh, nothing, Paige said, smirking. "It’s been a whole year since that big mess. Since then you’ve hung out with Cherry more than you’ve probably ever dreamed. One could almost get the idea that you two were in love."

    Fig, does she know? screamed Numer’s mind, his eyes wide.

    Well, that’s—you mean, you might think—I mean, that is, Numer stammered, wiggling his fingers together, actually, I’ve got to—that is . . . Yes, good morning, Paige, but I really must be going. Numer sleeged to the stage before he blurted out anything else. He wanted to tell Cherry his love first, and that meant mustering what little courage he had to say it sensibly straight to her face. He couldn’t let it slip away now, or at that vital moment, by becoming a puddle of nervousness.

    Numer wogged up a ramp to the platform; a thick grass carpet, easy on one’s tail skin, was spread over the wood. A species that moved by wogging, the tail sliding along the floor and rippling like ocean waves, could get a lot of splinters from bare wood. The carpet was just as lush as the waving grass in the ground but much more compact. Still, building with wood was useful for its quick construction and temporary usage. A clay platform would be heavy, and how would they remove it? Just push it into the ocean? At least they could take apart this platform and reuse the wood.

    As Numer wogged up the ramp a slube half his size sleeged past him, sending Numer leaning over the edge. Hey, be careful, Jake, he said to the young slube as he reached the platform in a yellow flash.

    The young slube laughed. Hiya, Numer. Today’s the party, huh?

    Yeah. Today’s the big day, Numer said.

    Jake sleeged around the platform and into Cherry’s open arms. She lifted him up and spun a few times, laughing with him. Hello, Jake, she said. How are you today?

    I’m doing great, Jake said. Today’s the party for you and Numer, right?

    Yep. Me and Numer. Numer and me, Cherry said, looking at Numer.

    A–And Zeth. Zeth, too, Numer stammered. Zeth was there, too. He cleared his throat and looked down, rocking back and forth on his tail.

    Hey, do you think I could be up on stage with you? Jake asked.

    I don’t see why not, Cherry said. After all you were on the adventure for a bit. You’re part of my family, too.

    All right, cool! Jake said as Cherry put him down. I’ll be back when it all starts. He sleeged off the platform to a group of romping slube children.

    He’s so brave, Cherry said. Numer looked up and watched Jake sleeg around with the other young slubes. I can tell he tries so hard not to show his sadness.

    Even if it is a celebration, it also marks the day those tragedies . . . Numer’s voice trailed off. He had almost locked up that day, frozen where he crouched, but Cherry kept him going. When it had all been over, fourteen slubes had died, but Jake had been the only kid to lose both parents in the attack—in Conrad’s awful attack on Nottle.

    He’s adapted so well to living with me and dad, Cherry said. And I feel like you’ve rubbed off on him, Numer.

    Gee, I hope not, Numer said. Anyone he rubbed off on would become a pile of frayed nerves.

    A shadow passed over Numer and a familiar, stern voice spoke from behind: I think you’ve rubbed off on my daughter, too, my boy.

    Numer flinched but stopped himself from cowering. The voice of Cherry’s father often did that to him. That voice was as strong and sturdy as a mountain.

    Really? Numer asked, pushing away the feeling that the merag was going to toss him out of town on his tail. I mean, I’m not sure what you mean.

    The merag of Nottle, Caleco, stood between Numer and Cherry, beaming. His suit and face looked creaseless today. I mean my daughter seems to have relaxed, Merag Caleco said. I don’t mean to sound like my old, overbearing self, but I haven’t worried about her once in the past year.

    Dad, c’mon, Cherry said, rolling her eyes. I think Numer actually rubbed off on you.

    Wait a minute, Numer said, if I keep rubbing off on cleeple, my skin’s going to get sore. The three of them laughed. But really, I think Cherry has rubbed off on me. I mean, I have been more active, what with all that training she’s had me do.

    Please don’t phrase it as training, Caleco said, squeezing his hands together. It makes it sound like you’re preparing for another disaster. Just call it, I don’t know, physical activities.

    From off the side of the platform Paige shouted, If you knew what cleeple were using that phrase for nowadays, you wouldn’t call it that.

    Numer looked away and blushed as green as the grass.

    Gern broke out laughing like a lunatic. She held onto the platform and gasped out, That’s the stupidest thing you’ve ever said.

    About ten minutes later, Numer pulled the stem off a shepa, a hard, red fruit from Hackney, and drank the juice inside. Caleco announced to the townscleeple that the celebration would soon begin. Slubes sat on the grass around the platform, some carrying fruit from a pile to share with others. Once everyone quieted down, Caleco wogged to the front of the platform.

    My friends, I have been your merag for twenty-four years now. In those twenty-four years, we never had such a major crisis as that of one year ago. It was a crisis that could have engulfed our entire world, but while we pulled through here in our town, three heroes went out to put a stop to it for our town and all of Mintop.

    He put an arm out to four thatch chairs behind him. The heroes that put an end to an invasion: my daughter Cherry, Numer, and . . .

    Numer, Cherry, and Jake were each sitting in a thatch chair on the platform, but one chair remained empty.

    Where was Professor Zeth?

    You’ve got to be kidding me, Cherry said. She shut her eyes and slapped a palm atop her snout. The audience murmured and laughed.

    Maybe I wasn’t the only one to sleep in today? Numer said. I’m surprised we didn’t notice he wasn’t around. He was silent for a moment, waiting like everyone else. Cherry exchanged a glance with him. Someone would have to get the silly professor. I guess I can go get Zeth. Numer got out of his seat and wogged to the west side of Nottle.

    Off the west edge of Nottle, a grassy bump stuck out of the sea. That was it. It couldn’t even be called a hill, just a bump of green a few tail lengths from the shore. On this bump, though, stood a wooden door, and through that door, an elevator led down to the laboratory of Professor Zeth. Before the stage was set, before the cleeple awoke, and before the sun rose, something was afoot in Zeth’s lab.

    Duth_Olec

    Whoa! Something can’t be afoot in Zeth’s lab.

    Wally_Plotch

    What do you mean?

    Duth_Olec

    Slubes don’t have feet. Something can’t be afoot. Maybe atail?

    Wally_Plotch

    Well, how about we move on?

    Zeth’s lab was a mess. It was always a mess. Inside a cave located below Nottle, it was a wonder that the ocean didn’t leak in. Blueprints and scrap metal lay everywhere, and spilled chemicals stained the brown rock floor walls. In the middle of this mess and taking a quarter of the space sat a round, metal machine. It was fitted with four wheels and contained two seats, a single in front and a bench in the back, and no roof. A slube lay sprawled on the padded front seat; a blueprint hung over his head; a splotched, patchy lab coat hung over his teal skesh. The blueprint fluttered slightly with his every exhale. As Professor Zeth slept, the lab began to vibrate. What started as a tiny rumble grew into a quake that knocked books and containers to the floor. Singed and dented boxes fell out of a closet, spilling paper, tools, and equipment.

    Zeth screamed and sat up. What is going on?

    He pulled the blueprint off his head and adjusted his thick goggle-glasses. The lab is shaking, he noted, looking around at things wobbling and tumbling. That is what is going on.

    A clock on the wall showed the time at roughly four in the morning. The sun would not even be out yet. He’d fallen asleep some five hours ago, around twenty-one last night, and now this malarkey was happening, whatever it was. Zeth pulled himself out of his machine, but with all the vibration, he fell to the lab floor in a yellow, lab coat-covered heap.

    A low grinding sound like a blender trying to chop rocks echoed up through the floor. Zeth placed his head against the cold, hard stone and listened to the sound rumbling up through the rock. It sounded like a drill. Perhaps someone was digging deep underground below the lab.

    Zeth threw off the lab coat and gathered an armful of tools. The vibration and

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