Jesse's Soul: Racing to Love, #2

By Amy Gregory

Jesse Frost lived the life most men would kill for, fast bikes, fame, money, and looks. Jesse, however, was just an easy-going guy from Texas who always worked hard for everything in life. He'd been the shy guy in school, so when the prom queen found him years later, he thought he had finally made it. Her mirage, however, left him empty and certain no woman wanted him for the simple man he was inside, until he met Emery Kincaid.

With a last name that is revered on the motocross circuit she had proved herself through and through, but Emery hides the pain that runs deep, physically and emotionally just to survive. When she and Jesse are thrown together sparks fly, both from the chemistry between them, and the brakes she tries desperately to throw on. Emery is afraid what Jesse doesn't know could break his heart and hiding her true feelings for him is the only way to protect them both. If she let Jesse in and he walked away...well, that's a risk her heart can't take.

• Language: English
• Publisher: REN Publishing
• Release date: May 4, 2017
• ISBN: 9781546496878

Amy Gregory

When asked ‘when do you have time to write’, Amy Gregory simply laughs.  The real answer is, “in bits and pieces”.  She and her husband live in Kansas City with their three fantastic kids that keep them running in three very different directions.  Because she sits so much, she always carries a notebook with her at all times. She has an off the wall, snarky, off the cuff sense of humor that often shocks even those who’ve known her for years.  And she loves that her children have all been blessed that ability to make others laugh as well.  At least she’s grateful most of the time!  Her husband often teases her about how she “makes this stuff up” when he’s reading a piece of her work. … The answer—“it just comes to me when I’m typing”. Scary thought, huh!

Book preview

CHAPTER ONE

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This cannot be happening—not now.

The words echoed in Jesse Frost’s head as he stood, momentarily stunned. He could do nothing but stare at the concrete floor beneath his boots as the news hit him like a two-by-four in the back.

Metal hitting metal, revving engines, yelled curses from some and cheers from others, all commonplace noises in the pits of the racing circuit melded together, then in unison faded out, until all he could hear was the pounding of his own pulse in his ears.

He closed his eyes.

Oh my God, Reid. What in the hell are we going to do? All attempts to keep cool were thrown out the window. The tight rein he kept on his temper was ready to snap, something he never let happen. He had always prided himself on being easy going. That reputation, however, was going straight down the drain in front of the entire team, but he was too wrapped up in his personal disaster to give two shits. We’re one week into the season, and we just pulled in today for the second race. What are we going to do? I can’t go into this race without Shawn. Jesse scrubbed his hands over his face and up into his hair.

Reid held up his hand. It’s not like we don’t have other mechanics on the team—

It’s not the same, Reid—he cut off his manager— and you know it. I’ve always liked how differently you run the team from everyone else. It works.

Jesse. Stop. It’s fine. I’ve got everything under control, Reid replied, his voice eerily calm and cool.

Jesse paced the small area outside their semi like a caged tiger, but Reid’s last comment halted him mid-stride. Jesse spun, facing the older man and threw his arms out, palms up, completely distraught. How’s that?

"Jesse, it was a family crisis. Shawn had no choice. You’re just panicking, and you need to calm down. I know Shawn is an amazing mechanic, and you trust him. I know the relationship between rider and mechanic is crucial, but I promise you, I’m bringing in the best to pair you with. I trained this mechanic myself, and rest assured...there is no one better. I mean—no one. It will all be fine. Trust me, son."

Again, Jesse ran his hands over his face and up through his hair, a nervous gesture he couldn’t control. Sweat beaded on the back of his neck. Flexing his fists at his sides, Jesse’s eyes darted around the space the team had set up as a temporary post. All eyes were on him, awaiting his next move. He was the only rider they had on the big bikes this season. Pressure like he had never known before had been placed on his shoulders, and now the walls were quickly closing in on him.

I’ve got to...I don’t know, I’ve just got to... His stomach was in knots.

For the past two months, Jesse had firmly believed this was his year. Of course, he always started off every season believing the same sentiment. He liked to consider himself as a positive thinker. Now, with this news, it looked like that hope was shot straight to hell.

He and Shawn had had some different things they’d planned to try, different strategies they’d hoped would give him an edge. Whether Jesse was riding in dirt, sand, or mud, Shawn had ideas. They spent hours testing out numerous combinations of parts for the various types of terrain over the long break between seasons, and now Jesse was starting over. With a guy he’d never met. A guy who may or may not give a crap for all Jesse knew.

Reid took a loud, deep breath. Do us both a favor and head over to Sterling’s. Maybe your friends can calm you down a little bit. I’ll call you when the new mechanic gets here. Should be any time now.

With one more pass around the circle of people watching him, Jesse did as his boss instructed.

He trudged toward Carter and Molly’s motorhome and let himself fall into a vacant, foldable camp chair. Their effort to form a circle was lacking. Over the course of a race weekend, more seats were pulled up and added to the growing group one-by-one as Eli, Carter and Molly, Joey and Brody got into town for the race. A few others joined in from time to time to be entertained by this band of friends, but they were random and usually came and went. The few Jesse cared about were there, and that was all that mattered at the moment.

A hand gripped his shoulder. Hey. I just heard. You okay, man? Cody asked.

Jesse barely glanced at Cody. Giving his head a shake, he let it fall back down to continue avoiding eye contact.

Cody was a good kid—he’d been the rookie on Carter’s team last year. The difference between Cody and some of the other newbies was he was like a sponge, soaking up any piece of knowledge or wisdom they shared with him. He was quiet and never had any family come to watch him race. Without ever saying anything, Carter, Eli, and Jesse had each slipped into the role of mentor.

Jesse ran his hands over his face then stopped himself, catching the habit. This couldn’t be happening. In theory, when a mechanic left, the next would be just as good. However, in Jesse’s experience, it was a mistake to think it was that simple. He had a hard time adjusting to a pro mechanic after having his dad at his side, his sole mechanic through his years as an amateur. Then again, when he’d been hired on under Reid, he’d had to get used to not only Shawn and his personal style, but the team’s philosophies in general –which were polar opposite to any other team on the circuit.

The way Reid ran the team, each bike had a dedicated mechanic. The others pitched in here and there, but it was that main relationship that continually brought Reid’s team win after win. It had worked well, until the last half of the outdoor series when Shawn began missing races due to family issues.

Something had slipped, and Jesse had gone from being second in points, to running a consistent fourth and fifth by the end of the outdoor season. Jesse knew he was eventually going to have to say something to Reid, but that was part of being a team. He owed Shawn a chance and had hoped that they would find their groove again, especially with the ideas Shawn had drummed up. The last thing he wanted was a new mechanic. The fear of the unknown was a whole lot worse than dealing with Shawn’s absences.

Jesse squeezed his eyes shut, unable to shake the visions of a ruined season ahead of him. Can you believe this?

Jesse, honey, it is going to be fine. Molly patted his arm as she squatted down in front of him. Reid wouldn’t bring in just anyone. You’re going to have to trust that he knows this guy. It will all be okay.

Mol. He looked at her, unable to mask the fear he felt. What would happen if you had to get used to someone else after being able to count on Joey after all these years?

I’m not saying it won’t be hard. There will be kinks, but you have to trust Reid. If Joey moved on, I’d have to trust that Brody wouldn’t let just anyone touch my bikes. This new guy isn’t the only one you need to have faith in. Reid’s been your manager for what, four years or more? He’s never let you down yet, right?

Jesse shook his head. Her words made sense. Believing them was another thing, though. The rolling waves of anxiety and nausea still controlled his stomach.

All right, then, cowboy, it’s time to play. This is what we all get paid to do. You can’t let this much emotion get in your head or you’re done. And I do mean...pack your shit—done. If you can’t trust your bike, you shouldn’t be on it, and to trust your bike, you have to trust your mechanic. It’s all or nothing, Jess, and you know I’m right.

Looking at Molly, Jesse blinked in awe. The normally giggly, sweetheart of a girl had been replaced by a serious my way or no way, take no shit woman. After living around her adoptive father, James, for almost half of her life, a few things had apparently rubbed off on her. Her confidence in the situation allowed a calm to settle over him. Releasing the first deep breath he’d been able to take, Jesse finally broke free of the eyes focused on him and looked to Carter for help.

She’s kinda mean. Jesse snorted, his lip curled.

But you know she’s right, Frost. Carter winked at his wife. And she gives a hell of pep talk, huh?

He pulled himself away from the tsunami of emotions that only moments ago had threatened to take him completely under.

It had always been that way for as long as he could remember. The three cohorts, banded together by a love of bikes and racing, bonded together by too many years to count. Carter, Eli, and he had celebrated both personal and professional triumphs as well as supported each other through the dark times.

Brothers. Not by blood, but by choice.

Once again, they would keep him afloat. Foxhole buddies for life. Adding Carter’s new wife, Molly, and her brother, Brody, and her mechanic, Joey, to the pack changed the group’s dynamic in ways they never knew they’d been missing.

Growing up in a loving but small family was wonderful. However, until Molly, Jesse didn’t realize what he was missing with his own sister. She was never teased about being an accident, but Ally was almost ten years younger than him. By the time she turned seven, he’d turned pro—and was gone. He loved her dearly, but they never had the connection siblings closer in age did.

Jesse had quickly grown to think of Molly as a sister. It had as much to do with her personality as it did the events of last season and the nightmare they walked through with her. As much as they teased each other, she was the first one to laugh with him, and the first to stand up and knock some sense into him when she felt he needed it.

Molly sat squatted in front of him, and he read the sureness in her eyes. Letting out a yielding breath, he took her face in his palms, pulling her closer then placed a quick peck on the top of her head. Thanks, D.

I’m never getting rid of that nickname, am I?

Humor fixed almost everything. He tried to grin, for her sake. Nope. As she stood, Jesse took the hand she held out. From the lower perspective, he gazed up. Don’t know what I’d do without you guys.

She squeezed his hand once before letting go. I could say the same thing, cowboy.

Eli nodded in agreement as Brody handed him a beer. She’s right. It’ll all be good, man.

Stopping mid-circle, Molly turned back. Now, Jess, you have to promise me you’ll give this guy a chance. Don’t go into it being an ass. He’s left his life, last minute, to come be on the road with you for five months. Remember that, okay?

She warned him sweetly, but it was a warning no less, and he took it as such. Yeah, D. I promise.

You want a beer? I’ll get you one while I’m up. She looked at Carter. You want one, don’t you, honey?

You’re too good to me, gorgeous.

Feeling like a voyeur, but unable to look away, Jesse sensed the onset of the absurd jealousy he worked so hard to hide, starting to surface. What Molly and Carter had was amazing. He couldn’t be happier for Carter, and Jesse adored Molly with all his heart. It didn’t keep him from longing to have the same.

The pride was evident on Carter’s face. Having a woman look at him like he was the center of her world one minute, and like she needed to devour him the next, was something every man hoped to have. Smoldering looks, hidden secrets, and private jokes. Knowing she was the last thing on his mind at night and the first thing on it when he woke with her in his arms.

That—that’s what Jesse was jealous of. Not his friends. Just the same kind of wonderful they had, and he had yet to find for himself. It wasn’t going to be happening any time soon, either. Not with his career and the travel which went with it. His chosen path wasn’t conducive to long-term relationships, and Jesse, although he regularly received offers, didn’t do casual. Period.

He sighed. For the moment, he was content to let Molly smother him with her sisterly love and affection. She’s too good to all of us, aren’t you, D?

Just for that, your brownies are on our counter, cowboy.

The smile didn’t reach his eyes. That almost makes this better. Thanks, Mol.

Might take several pans of those heaven-sent chocolate squares though.

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Emery Kincaid closed her eyes for the last few minutes of the cab ride. She wanted so desperately to be excited. She was getting back to something she’d loved her entire life. It was in her blood—in her DNA. Her whole world had revolved around bikes.

Had. Back then, she would eat, sleep, and breathe bikes. Back then, life was perfect. Suddenly, she felt—she let out a silent snort—old.

Hey, sleepyhead, we’re here. John nudged her as he opened the cab door. I’ll get your bags.

Thanks, she replied, leaving out the enthusiasm, mostly on purpose.

Like most of the walk through the airport and the cab ride to the stadium, she kept her answers short. Emery couldn’t fault the guy for trying. He was handsome and friendly enough, if she were looking for something. Hopefully he’d gotten the hint—she wasn’t.

Emery glanced around the indoor pits as she made her way to her dad’s factory trailer. The floor-to-ceiling gray of the building had been transformed into motocross central, but in reality, nothing had changed. Except for the vendor logos and which semi-trailer they were on this year from last year, and the normal musical chairs which occurred between riders and factories as some of the contracts were rewritten. Other than that, it was all the same. The rigs were parked close to one another, the vendors setting up tables, each factory and their mechanics getting their team’s bikes unloaded and prepped. It was all...perfect.

She breathed in the familiar scents of exhaust, gas, and tires—all the smells of what she considered home. Hey, Dad.

Honey, you’re here. Her father hugged her. I’ve missed you. He turned to the other mechanic on the team. Thanks for going to the airport to get her, John.

No problem, sir. How’d Jesse take it? The Irish gleam in Reid Kincaid’s eyes sparkled with mischief. Uh...

That good? Emery shook her head. Damn it, Dad. You’ve got to be kidding me. Great, you’ve brought me into the damn lion’s den, Dad. So, if he’s already pissed that Shawn had to leave, I’m guessing—only because I know you, oh so well—that you didn’t tell him that his new mechanic was me, either?

Well...honey, Reid shrugged some things are just better left to surprise.

Do you and Jess know each other already? John asked, his brow furrowed.

No. Emery shook her head and crossed her arms. "I’m just assuming he’s going to be really happy to find out that I’m a woman. Damn it, Dad. I don’t want to start out this way. She hoped that trace of a smile on her dad’s face was covering up nerves. Her father knew full well how much she hated surprises. Emery rubbed her forehead to try and stop the pounding in her head and the slight spin the room just took. And I’m warning you now, if he’s an asshole, I’m out of here. I’ve got better things to do with my time than put up with some jackass that doesn’t want me here in the first place."

Let’s just go meet him before you let that chip on your shoulder weigh you down, okay, honey?

Don’t start, Dad. It’s been a rough three days rearranging my life for you.

I know...I appreciate it. I do.

I prefer to say you owe me. Big time.

Don’t I always? Emery half-glared at her dad’s answer and rolled her eyes. Well, let’s take you to meet Jesse.

She narrowed her eyes, studying her father. Isn’t he here...in the trailer?

No, he’s hanging out over by Noland and Sterling’s semis. You’ll figure out pretty quick that’s where most of the guys hang out.

You’ve got to be kidding me. I will not kill him. I will not kill him. She decided if she made that her new mantra, it might save her dad’s life.

This was not how she envisioned the introductions going. She had prepared herself for Jesse to be a little skeptical of her, but figured after a quick handshake and conversation, she’d quietly go to work. But to find out that, one, Jesse was freaked out by losing Shawn, two, her dear old dad had withheld a tiny piece of information from him that could possibly send the rider through the roof, and three, she had to go meet said possible explosion waiting to happen in front of all his friends? Well, that was just the cherry on top of the whole damn day.

Are you freaking serious? Lion’s den? Hell, Dad, you’re going to walk me into a firing squad. Can’t he come back here?

It’s fine, Em. Besides, Molly needs another gal around here. The boys are kind of ornery to her, and you two will get along great.

Emery steeled her nerves and popped her neck side to side, tired from the flight, the four-hour layover, and the early morning that had started it all. Let’s go get this over with. I want see his bike, find out when I can get him on the track, and watch him ride. I’ve got some changes I want to make from watching tape.

Emery’s stomach twisted tighter and tighter the longer they walked. She wasn’t good in large groups, and she didn’t handle meeting strangers very well when she felt so out-numbered.

I knew I’d find you here, son, her father called out as they reached the group. Jesse stood up as Reid approached. Jesse Frost, I’d like you to meet, Emery...Kincaid.

Emery knew who Jesse was. She had seen him before when she’d been around and had seen him on TV. She hadn’t, however, met him in person, and she wasn’t prepared at all for the reaction her body was having to him—all on its own without a damn bit of permission from her brain.

His low-slung 501s and black T-shirt did little to mask the muscled man beneath them. He was sexy as sin, and his trademark five o’clock shadow only made him look...dangerous. His body screamed one thing, but his face gave the man away. The way his light brown eyes crinkled when he flashed his crooked smile sent Emery on high alert.

Oh...holy...hell.

The man was freaking hot. She’d admit it. Fine. That didn’t mean anything. It also didn’t mean anything that her heart was about to pound out of her chest or that her mouth was completely dry, not to mention the fact that the most beautiful eyes she’d ever seen were sending electric tingles up her spine. Nope, didn’t mean anything.

Ah, but that smile.

It was a welcoming smile that reached up and made his light-brown eyes warm and friendly, if she had time for that sort of thing. She jammed her hands in her pockets instead.

Jesse tilted his chin. I knew you had to be Reid’s daughter.

Yeah? Her heart might be racing, her façade, however, never cracked.

Jesse winked at her. I can tell by the green eyes. Emery just shrugged. He turned to her father. So Reid, is he here yet?

Her father’s face scrunched, the confusion obvious. Who, Jess? he asked.

Reid. Jesse threw his arms up in the air. My new mechanic. Remember our little crisis? he said, gesturing between himself and her father.

Emery could tell by his demeanor that he was very stressed out about Shawn leaving him. Way more than her father had let on a few minutes ago.

Slowly, she extended her hand to Jesse. Hi.

Jesse was about to finish taking his panic attack out on Reid, but he took her hand to shake it, then couldn’t let go. It was almost...magnetic. He stared deeper into her eyes, searching for something, but he didn’t know what. It was the emerald green. They were sort of...haunting. Her porcelain face was framed by hair so dark it was almost black. It didn’t appear she had any makeup on and could have been the girl next door, but she had such an iconic look, she struck him. Reminiscent of the pin-up girls of the old days. Fair skinned, wavy hair that reached the top of her shoulders, pink lips, and those shockingly green eyes framed by long black eyelashes. He blinked a couple of times, trying to get his focus back.

"Son...Emery is your new mechanic."

His mind was not up to speed with what was going on around him. A thousand questions raced through his head, but all he could concentrate on was the soft, warm hand in his and the big green eyes looking at him. What? He glanced at Reid, but unconsciously hung on to Emery’s hand, gripping it a little tighter.

You heard me. I said Emery is my new lead, and she’s going to be your dedicated mechanic. She’s replacing Shawn. Jesse’s eyes locked back on Emery’s, completely dumbfounded. I told you I was bringing in the best in the business for you. Emery...she is the best, Reid stated. No offense, Joey.

Jesse shook his head, forcing himself to focus. Nothing about what his manager was saying made a lick of sense. I know you’re a family kind of guy. In the back of my mind, I wondered if you were getting someone you were close with to come in this late in the game, but I assumed you’d bring in your son. He cringed and turned back to the green eyes. I’m sorry, no offense.

Emery jerked her shoulder and let it fall.

Jesse kicked himself. Apparently, it wasn’t the first time she’d heard an asshole comment like that. He wasn’t that guy, yet he saw the flash of disappointment in her eyes, the fall of her face. Jesse went out of his way to treat women with respect, but she’d never be able to guess it by his current behavior. Judging by the look that had swept her face, she had just lumped him in with every other jackass male.

Shit. Murphy’s Law strikes again.

It was first time he had a reaction that strong to a woman, and he crashed right out of the gate.

Jesse, Riley is a hell of a rider. And before he retired, he had a few good years in the pros, but he’s no mechanic. Yes, he knows how to fix a bike and what to do to make it a great race bike, but he doesn’t have what it takes to handle the pressure of being a team mechanic. Not at this level. Emery does.

Jesse watched as she glanced around at his group of friends surrounding him, and he took in the fact that they were all staring at her. It had to be an uncomfortable spot to be in, and just as he started to open his mouth to speak, she took a deep breath, and then narrowed her gaze as she locked in on him, dead in the eye. His words stilled on his tongue.

Look, Emery started, let’s get this over with, right here, right now. I know that bike, inside and out. The setup needs some changes, and I’ve watched race tape on you for the last three days. I know what I need to do to make it perform better for you. I know what to do to put that bike on the podium. You can either trust me and make it to the podium with it, or—Emery’s chin went up, but she never broke her eye contact with him— you can find another mechanic who will keep you in fifth place, like you have been.

He felt his mouth slowly drop open.

"It’s your call. Now, if you don’t want me here, that’s fine, no hard feelings. My shit is still packed. It’s one phone call to the airport. Otherwise, I expect to have your full trust. And I want full communication. I don’t want you going through Reid on anything with the bike. If you need something, or want something tweaked on the bike, you come to me. And only me. Never—go over my head. Are we clear?"

Jesse stared, stunned. After a long minute, he slowly nodded his head, rendered speechless by her.

So, what’s it going to be? You decide right now, she said. He was still gaping at her, but during this whole speech she had given, he hadn’t noticed he was still holding her hand and his grip had gotten tighter. You and me together? Or do you like fifth place?

The confident little shrug she gave him after the smack down she’d delivered could have come across as smug to some. It made his breath hitch. Jesse stood stock still, unable to tear his eyes away from Emery.

He could not figure out what had just hit him. He was mesmerized by her green eyes, and at the same time, he was completely taken—and terrified by her personality. Eli and Molly were snickering behind him. Jesse could hear them, but couldn’t break the trance he’d slipped into in her presence.

He had never been a player, didn’t sleep around, didn’t act the part of a celebrity athlete. His old soul really just longed for a connection—a connection that would last a lifetime. Traveling as he did for his career, Jesse had started to become disheartened that he might never find the right girl.

Emery paused several seconds in silence before she went on, apparently waiting on him to answer. If he hadn’t been frozen in place, he would have immediately replied. But as it was, all the blood in his head had drained southward, and the few remaining brain cells he had left weren’t working well enough for a coherent conversation, let alone a witty comeback to the gauntlet she’d thrown down.

Tick tock, Jesse. If I’m staying, I have about eight hours’ worth of work I’m going to do to that bike before I put you on it to practice tomorrow. It’s already seven. I need to know now what the hell you want to do.

He finally blinked and grasped for the breath he wasn’t aware he’d held in. I’m in, Emery. I’m in.

All right. I need to borrow you for about thirty minutes, then you can go back to what you’re doing.

Um. Okay? Well, um, don’t you want me to introduce you to everyone? Maybe you could hang out here with me, I mean us, he rushed out the fix for his slip in words. And well, just hang out. Jesse had gone from completely panicked about losing Shawn, to a bumbling, turned-on idiot in about three minutes flat. This had to be one of the best first impressions he’d ever made. Not. So much for smooth. Instead he felt like the shy boy of his younger years, the awkward teen that rarely dared to make eye contact with a girl in school.

She looked at her dad. He could only guess for reassurance, possibly?

Turning back to him, she rolled her eyes. I’ll let you introduce everyone...if you’ll let go of my hand. But then I have to get to work.

Jesse felt his face instantly heat up. He bit the inside of his cheek to keep from laughing through his nerves. All his friends stood up, and he introduced them one by one. Molly stood waiting by Carter, but he could see her uncontrollable smile.

And this is Carter and Molly Sterling. I’ve raced with Carter and Eli since we were kids. And Molly is in our opening ceremonies. She’s amazing. Wait till you see her this weekend.

I’ve seen you, Molly. You are awesome. She shrugged as he opened his mouth to ask. I flew in for the race in Houston last year to see Reid.

Isn’t he your dad? Eli raised his eyebrow.

Not here. She shook her head. Here...we just have the same last name.

Jesse saw Reid roll his eyes and shake his head from behind her. It was funny, but there was no way on earth Jesse would laugh. If you were in Houston, how come I didn’t meet you? Jesse tipped his head as he tried to remember the day of that particular race.

I wasn’t there to meet you.

Oh snap, Jess. You’re going to do just fine here, Emery. Molly hugged her. You let me know if you need anything, okay?

Thanks, Molly. Jesse took in the way Emery quickly disengaged from the contact and rolled her shoulders. Now, can I have a few minutes of your time? she asked him.

It