The Oscar for Life

By Declan Loy

YOU'VE NEVER READ A BOOK LIKE THIS BEFORE.

Every once in a while, a story comes along which changes lives forever.
Declan Loy's The Oscar is such a book. It is the story of Ethan, an overachiever who has everything in life, except the thing that matters to him most - happiness. The Oscar is Ethan's gripping story of how an adventure in Thailand became a journey of self-discovery and, ultimately, a guide to finding true happiness and fulfilment in life ... a happiness which lies, and is directed from, within.

The Oscar is an unforgettable novel about the essential inspiration which lies within all of us, how to access it and listen to it for direction and fulfilment in life.

• Language: English
• Publisher: eBookIt.com
• Release date: Apr 26, 2016
• ISBN: 9781456626303

Book preview

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Prologue

The best and most beautiful things in the world cannot be seen or even touched - they must be felt with the heart.

Helen Keller

As the boat approached the island, at least one passenger aboard looked at the shoreline with a sense of anticipation. The journey had been smooth but now at 8am in the morning, tiredness was beginning to seep in. He had travelled throughout the night, first enduring ten gruelling hours on the bus that travelled from Hua Hin to Surat Thani before undertaking this two-hour boat journey to the island of Koh Samui. None of it had been planned and maybe that was why it had been such an amazing journey.

Have you ever noticed in life that sometimes the things which are the most enjoyable and fulfilling are never planned?

As the boat docked, two feelings were present within Ethan. The first was a feeling of excitement and euphoria, which made his heart beat like a drum and helped hide his fatigue behind the veil of his conscious awareness. He sensed all the secrets, which he had discovered to date on this journey, were nothing compared to what he was about to experience right now, on this island. Something special was about to occur!

The second feeling was one of tiredness, of letting go. It was like there were two parts to him. One part was the controller, the ‘Me’ or ego part of his being – the hard worker, always trying to make things happen, to be the captain of the ship. The other was the quiet, still voice, the ‘I’ or Inspiration, which the current captain of the ship ‘Me’ kept locked away. These two parts, both existing within his being, were beginning to divide and separate. What a strange awareness, he thought quietly to himself.

He considered the journey and what it was really about?

In his late forties, Ethan was a family man married to Natalie, a stunning looking brunette, with the most pleasant personality you could meet. She was the type of person you always wanted to be around, with a smile that would melt the heart of anyone she met. If you were to describe her as a smell, then she would be the embodiment of the sweet smell of roses. She had a pure spirit and, without doubt, was to some a form of higher power in life. Ethan considered himself lucky to have such a beautiful, thoughtful wife and three wonderful children; Angelina, Connor and Alex.

People had differing views of Ethan and he had changed much during his life. Some may have thought him intense, hardworking and determined, with a lot of energy and enthusiasm. At times, he could be the best person in the world, similar to Natalie in ways. But there was another side to him, a darker force, which, if unleashed, was not so nice.

He grew up in Northern Ireland during ‘The Troubles’ – the conflict between the British and Irish and the North’s Protestants and Catholics. Growing up in this environment, he had become used to witnessing the shootings, bombings, and terrorist attacks which dominated the evening news bulletins. Close friends were affected by ‘The Troubles’ and Ethan remembered one friend whose hand was blown off, as the man planted a bomb.

This was the environment in which Ethan grew up, though, at the time, it was not a major issue for him as he didn’t know any better. The middle child in a family of nine youngsters, Ethan’s mother, was a house-wife who took great care of her children. A pleasant, peaceful lady, she kept herself to herself. But his father became caught up in the fighting, which inevitably resulted in jail time, raids on their home by British soldiers, and his father being tortured and beaten. The violence left its mark on his father, who drank heavily and brought his problems home with him in the form of aggression against his wife and children.

But right here, right now, on the dock of this island port, his mind was centred on his future, not his past. He hired a motorbike from a dockside garage and set off in search of his hotel. He gunned the throttle and as the engine roared, it seemed to speak to him in a language only he and the bike could understand – why? Perhaps because it was a journey they’d discovered together. As he headed to the hotel, his heart was filled with joy, a heavenly blissful feeling. It flowed through his body, like a boat riding on the waves of the sea, flowing through the veins of his being. How could he describe to anyone what he was feeling at this moment?

It occurred to him that, if heaven really existed then surely, at that moment, he was in it. His awareness was rising to levels only angels dream of. He didn’t feel he was driving the motorbike, he felt as if the motorbike was driving him, as though they were one, and everything around them was also one with them.

In that very moment, a thought crossed his mind: was this the reason he had travelled to Thailand, to experience this feeling? Certainly he had discovered many gifts in Thailand. He had discovered himself. But what was the self that he had discovered? Was that what this journey to Thailand was really about? During his life, he had often wondered about the idea of winning an award for life. The more he’d thought about it, the more he was convinced that it was a great idea and, eventuality, he’d settled on the idea that he would set himself a new goal in life, he would win an ‘Oscar for life’. Now, as he roared along on this motorbike, he thought: ‘When I have arrived in life, when I have made it, when I am a success, I will write the book called winning an Oscar for Life."

Have I arrived? he wondered.

As he drove down the Thai highway his life flashed before his eyes. A similar experience happened several years earlier in his home in Drogheda, Ireland. In that moment, he had foreseen a life of work, work, work, achievement, achievement, achievement. But it had also revealed a life in which he would miss out on his family, health, happiness, fulfilment and peace of mind. He could see only a life of always searching for more and it wasn’t a pleasant vision. It was a very painful one in fact! However, that search for more had ultimately lead to this point, the journey of self-discovery in Thailand and the images of the future now flashing before his eyes were very different. Instead of the pain he had previously anticipated, his mind was now filled with images of fulfilment, peace, joy, happiness, living life with purpose, discovering his real talents, experiencing unconditional love, free from fear, doubt, worry, stress, pressure, living with abundance. In that instant he realised he had all of these gifts in his life, now he knew what it took to win an Oscar for life.

He rode on, thinking about the decisions, which had brought him to this point and the sacrifices he’d made. He’d been called upon to do something unexpected in his life by walking away from his role as director in one of Europe’s top companies. It had been an incredibly difficult decision to make, one which saw him give up a salary of €250,000 per year, a luxury lifestyle and even some friendships. He’d been asked to give it all up, his entire life, so he could go off and try to discover the truth about life and uncover a message, which might help millions of other people to become happier, more fulfilled and live peaceful, meaningful lives.

And who had called upon him to do all of this? Some inner voice which spoke only to him? Was he mad to have listened to this voice from within? Would any sane person have done it? Had total faith that everything in life would be taken care of, if only you followed the path this voice recommended to you?

Any normal person would have refused to follow such a voice. Even if they’d accepted the need to find out about the truth of life, they’d have questioned the need to travel to the other side of the world to do so – why couldn’t he find the answers by staying in Ireland?

But he’d trusted the voice without question and embarked on a three-week journey of self-discovery in Thailand, leaving behind his wife and children. He hadn’t planned anything on the trip, trusting instead that everything would be looked after by someone, or something. He’d just started travelling, listening to his inner voice and waiting for signs and messages to be sent his way. All the time, the voice assured him that these messages would reveal to him the truth about life, the next evolution of mankind and the path to hidden treasure, which lay within him.

And then it happened!

He was given the perfect message, a sign that he was on the right track to discovering hidden treasures. On the side of the road, he spotted a statue – an amazing statue. It had to be a sign, a part of the truth he had come to Thailand to discover.

Right there in front of him – by the side of a back-road in Thailand – came the clearest sign that he had been right to follow his inner voice.

He pulled over, turned off the bike’s engine and let the sound of the machine tail off into silence. Removing his helmet, he looked with amazement at the sight before him. Was it a figment of his imagination? A mirage in the heat of the Thai afternoon? But the statue before him was real. Standing 5 foot 11 inches tall, and sparkling with all the glory you would expect from such a figure, was a statute of an Oscar.

Chapter 1 The Journey Begins

We are not human beings having a spiritual experience. We are spiritual beings having a human experience.

Pierre Teilhard de Chardin

The journey to that statue by the side of the road in Thailand had been a long and difficult one. Two years previously, Ethan’s life had been transformed during a trip to Spain. One night, in the family’s new villa in Southern Europe, Ethan lay in bed, wide awake. It was his family’s first night in the holiday house of their dreams and he should have felt euphoric but, instead, he was unsettled, miserable and close to tears.

Natalie lay beside him. Glancing over at her, Ethan hoped his restlessness wasn’t disturbing her, but she was fast asleep. The clock on the bedside table showed it was 2.30am, exactly two minutes since he’d last checked.

This three-week break was the family’s first visit to their new holiday home and they’d travelled over from Ireland with their three children and Natalie’s parents.

A holiday in the sun! How many rainy days in Ireland had he consoled himself with the thought that, one day, he’d own a place in Spain where it hardly ever rained?

And he’d done it. He’d worked so hard in the previous twelve months to achieve this goal of owning a villa in Spain. He should have felt ecstatic, but he wasn’t anywhere close to it. He felt down and empty. What was wrong with him? Why wasn’t he happy? It didn’t make sense.

A year earlier, he’d gone into goal-setting overdrive. He set goals to achieve all kinds of things: buying a property investment portfolio; owning a beautiful 5,000 square foot home on an acre of land in the Irish countryside; making €250,000 in income; owning a new Porsche; achieving €100 million in sales; opening a chain of retail shops in Ireland; becoming a millionaire; having an outstanding relationship with Natalie and their three children; reaching twelve and a half stone in weight, and taking a three-week vacation with the family. And he’d done it all, hit every target he’d set himself.

So what was wrong? Why was he lying awake the first night in the dream holiday house, unable to sleep?

Ethan rolled from side to side, tossing and turning and wondering why he couldn’t sleep. It wasn’t a normal feeling of restlessness: it was a feeling of non-fulfilment coming from deep within the centre of his soul. He’d thought that, when he’d reached his goals, he would feel happier than ever before, but he didn’t. Yes, he had been happy for a while, but it had been surface-level happiness.

He was surrounded by beautiful material things and knew he could buy anything he wanted, go anywhere he wanted and do anything he wanted. Yet he felt unfulfilled.

Tears welled up in his eyes as he stared at the ceiling above him.

What is happening to me? Why am I crying? he wondered. He had everything he wanted in life but, above all, he had three beautiful children and a wonderful wife.

The connection between Ethan and Natalie had always been so close they could almost read each other’s thoughts. At times, Ethan might be thousands of miles from home, but Natalie could pick up on what he was feeling and thinking and would later tell him on the phone what had been on his mind. The relationship they had was not man-made – it was a pure, unconditional love.

Thoughts and images raced through Ethan’s mind… goals, achievements, money, houses, cars, travel, things to do, places to go, deals to be done, a better life to achieve, helicopters, business ideas to create… On and on his thoughts raced until finally, he could take no more.

STOP! he urged himself. Just stop. For pity’s sake, give me a rest!

Mercifully, the torture ceased, but Ethan was no closer to understanding why he felt so low. He’d achieved what he’d set out to achieve. What more was there to do?

Maybe it was all too easy. Perhaps the challenge wasn’t there anymore. Maybe he was finding getting what he wanted, achieving his goals, too easy. He had the ability to set his mind on any goal and, like magic, he would achieve it. It had been a long, hard slog to get here. He’d spent his earlier business career working 14-hour days. Back then, he believed the secret to successful living was to work hard and, if that didn’t produce exceptional results, then he figured he had to work even harder and longer.

His attitude hadn’t gone unnoticed by family and friends, and it wasn’t always welcomed. On his wedding day, Ethan’s father, who Ethan didn’t get on with, warned Natalie: Watch that guy, he wants everything now.

It was an insightful comment from a man with whom Ethan had no real relationship. His father had described exactly the type of person Ethan was: he wanted everything immediately. He wanted the great things in life: to be wealthy and successful – whatever successful meant.

He knew there was another way to live. He’d often heard people talking about the power of the human mind with their mantra that, whatever you believe, you can achieve. But he dismissed their beliefs out of hand, describing them as ‘mind games’ and ‘mumbo jumbo’. He preferred to concentrate on sheer hard work to get ahead and believed the secret of success was to work on one thing while thinking of the next five things you were going to do.

Move fast, work hard and just get on with it, was his maxim. Drive things, Ethan told everyone he met and, in the beginning at least, that approach seemed to work.

But when Natalie became pregnant and gave birth to their first daughter, Angelina, things changed. It became harder for Ethan to justify working long days when he knew that Natalie needed his help with Angelina at home.

Then came a life-saving revelation.

One summer’s evening at his home in Drogheda, Ethan was caught up working on a multi-million pound contract which was throwing up all sorts of unexpected problems and challenges. As he sat there in the kitchen grappling with the contract, he gradually became aware of the presence of Natalie’s mother, Kristina, who was cuddling and comforting a crying Angelina. As he caught sight of his crying daughter and the doting grandmother, he felt an overwhelming sadness. Suddenly, he caught a glimpse of a future – his future – in which he spent his time working, working, working, and not being there for his family. He pictured a life in which he wasn’t able to show his children how much he loved them, in which they would grow up without knowing him. Like a hammer blow, he realised they would grow up exactly as he had – without knowing their father.

He didn’t do anything then to change, but he was becoming aware!

The next day he woke at 5.30am. It was a bright, sunny morning and, through the partly open window, he could feel the heat in the air, and hear the first verses of the dawn chorus. The beautiful Boyne Valley stretched away into the distance and Ethan knew that, somewhere down near the river’s edge, early morning anglers would be preparing for a morning of quiet fishing. He breakfasted and set off for his Dublin office shortly after 6am, anxious to miss the usual rush-hour traffic. By 7am he was sitting at his trendy Danish desk in the office, looking down on the cars in Walkinstown Avenue, which were at a standstill.

Later that morning, his colleague, Paul, walked into his office and sat down.

Well, Ethan, how’re things?

Ethan winced at the question as though somebody had struck him on the side of the head with a piece of timber. Images from the previous night flooded back into his mind. He thought of Kristina cuddling her crying granddaughter – his daughter. He realised he hadn’t been there for his child when she needed him. Suddenly, he was overwhelmed by emotion and started to cry. He saw his life flash before him: a life of struggle, pressure, work, stress, pain, of not being there for his family, and of pushing his family away.

That’s it, he thought. There has to be an easier way than this, an easier way to get the most out of life. I want it all – business success, financial success, health success – but I also want to be there for the most important people in my life.

The memory of his crying daughter had been just a moment in time. But, somehow it had triggered within him a question, which demanded an answer – what kind of life did he want to live? How could he become all he was capable of becoming without the stress, pressure and fear destroying the most truly important parts of his life?

Though he didn’t yet know it back then, that question would set him on a journey of learning about the mind, human performance, strategy, business, psychology and achievement. In the two years since that moment, the first part of his journey had been immense. He had become a millionaire businessman who seemingly managed the impossible – achieving all of his personal and financial goals while managing to build a wonderful relationship with his wife and children.

It had all been achieved by learning about the ‘mumbo jumbo’ he’d so readily dismissed in his earlier life. Since jettisoning that antipathy to ‘mind games’, he’d learned about the power of the human mind and, in doing so, had achieved so much more than he ever thought possible.

But lying there that night in Spain, he realised something was missing. His heart felt empty and his mind was racing uncontrollably. Ethan had always believed questions control the direction of one’s life. Two questions had dominated his life: the first was, Is there an easier way to achieve and have everything you want in life, than by hard work? The second thing he asked himself was: Is there more to life than just achieving?

He repeated the two questions in his mind without any expectation of an answer.

But, to his surprise, that’s exactly what he got – an answer. He heard a voice speaking to him but when he looked around the room for the person who was talking there was no one there, save his sleeping wife. He shook himself to make sure he wasn’t dreaming, but he was awake.

Fear gripped his mind.

I’m going crazy, talking to myself, and hearing voices, he said. Yet, at the same time, he felt a rush of energy flow through every cell of his body. He felt so alive, and it was as if he became the whole room, and the room became him.

Then the voice said: If you want to know the answer, get up and walk to the sea, and I will show and tell you the answer.

He looked around again for the source of the answer but there was no one there. Was he talking to himself? Was he losing his mind?

And yet, the feeling which accompanied the voice was so peaceful, so alive and full of energy that he felt complete fulfilment. The moment was indescribably beautiful. A sweet smell of roses filled his nostrils and a feeling of unconditional love flowed through him. His heart beat effortlessly with the rhyme of the flow. He felt so alive, so alert.

The voice came again, but this time as a feeling, an inner calling that whispered in his heart: Get up and walk to the sea.

I can’t be walking around the town at this hour in the morning, Ethan replied. What will Natalie think? What will her parents think? If I get up, I’ll probably wake the kids.

But the feeling, to go to the sea, was so strong it was as if a large powerful arm had caught hold of him, and was pulling him out of bed!

What the hell is going on here? he wondered. But the voice, the force was irresistibly pulling him towards the sea. He got out of bed, dressed and then furtively crept through the house. He gently opened and closed the front door and slipped out into the early morning. He felt like an adventurer, ready to explore a land he’d never seen before.

He walked by the swimming pool and on past the palm trees whose leaves in the moonlight were like the blades of a giant, silver dagger. The night air was warm on his skin and he guessed it must still be about 28 degrees.

Momentarily he paused at the sound of voices and laughter, but quickly realised they were coming from a nearby balcony. A slight wind rustled the palm trees above him as he walked. With every step he took, he felt even more energy flowing through his body. His esoteric energy pulsated outwards from his body, almost touching the air and trees.

He was becoming so aware of everything around him. He thought about a quote he read once by the physicist, Dr. Nikola Tesla who said: If you want to find the secrets of the universe, think in terms of energy, frequency and vibration.

At that moment, he wasn’t just thinking about energy, he was experiencing it flowing in his body.

Am I about to discover the secrets of the universe? he wondered.

As he continued to walk, a feeling of limitlessness came over him as though he were connected to the wind, the air, to everything around him. He thought again about his