The Ladiesman-Ifesto What Sales, Science and Love Have in Common: How to Attract Any Woman You Want

By Sebastian Castaneda

The LadiesMan-ifesto was illustrated as an invigorating and compelling new way to approach, attract and date women. I wrote this book for men that want a very specific blue print to implement in order to attain tangible results with woman. This isn’t about feel good speeches, pick up lines, a get laid quick scheme, or any other pseudo trickery you can think of. This is just raw powerful knowledge passed down by some of the greatest thinkers of our time with a modern twist. If you want an actual system that shows precision, innovation and accountability all rolled up into one, then this resource is for you. There is someone very special out there waiting for you to become the powerful man you have suppressed deep down. This book will harness that veiled potential, force it out so the world may see you for who you really are… a Gladiator.

• Language: English
• Publisher: BookBaby
• Release date: Mar 7, 2016
• ISBN: 9781483565866

Book preview

Sebastian

Introduction

When you realize that you have the power to will into existence the life you want, you’ll see the universe yield upon your command.

Sebastian Castañeda

In the span of 10 months I dated over 40 different women. Basically four dates a month, one per week on average. As I went on these dates I had an objective. I wanted to allow myself the opportunity to observe how these social engagements really worked. What separated a great date from a poor date? What did women respond to best? What are the ingredients to successfully meeting and dating women? I felt like a social hacker trying to debunk some incredible mystery.

When I saw the show The Bachelor I asked, why not me? Why can’t I have women line up for me, what am I missing? Granted I didn’t have the money, the looks, or the show to assist with the process. It was clear to me that having those vast options was a significantly better approach to dating; the bachelor is playing offense and not defense. He is totally relaxed and it is the women who must win him over.

The question I asked at that point was how can I get women to line up for me? Is it possible for an average guy like me to have that sense of control when dating, like the bachelor?

One day it hit me like a bat over the head. When I looked at my sales career I noticed a pattern. My sales output was directly affected by the systems I had input. I had something powerful in my sales systems and that power was called leverage. That’s what this book is about, the specific systems I created and translated from my success in sales to love that allowed me to date over 40 women in 10 months and the frameworks you need to promote your success. Like in marketing they say absorb what is working, don’t reinvent the wheel.

You see, all the information I was seeking was very vague and general. Nothing stood out to me with real tangible substance that I could implement practically. When I see coaches teaching this stuff it’s always generalized to meet a mass audience, and the message is always vague statements like just be yourself and remain optimistic or go up to her and be a jerk. You know, the watered-down sentiments we’ve all heard. I knew there was something more powerful underneath the surface. It just required the right miner to dig it up.

I not only consumed information from a theoretical standpoint, I implemented everything and made the necessary adjustments to maximize my success. It was by no means perfect—I had my theories and strategies challenged over and over again. I had to break it down and rebuild more times than I care to admit.

But I never stopped experimenting and growing. Things will always look worse right before your transition into greatness.

Let me ask you, would you rather learn combat from the gladiator in the arena, or from the theoretical practice coach? If you’re like me, you’d rather learn from the gladiator. I learned so many things that are not even mentioned in dating blogs, psychology studies or PUA methods. For example, how to isolate yourself online in order to dramatically increase your success with women. These are things that can only be learned through the experience of being in the arena.

Although my unfair advantage was my sales method of approach and I had also read just about every piece of social literature on interpersonal relationship-building that I could get my hands on. I’ve also had the incredible pleasure to have interviewed sociology and psychology professors, some of whom have been featured on USA Today. Most recently, Dr. Palmer from the University of California State provided me with her extensive field research on modern flirting and the new platform of love. I never had an intention to manipulate any woman or trick them into doing things. I just became more aware of myself and my environment, and concentrated incredible attention to the smallest of details which directly contributed to my success with women.

When I started this dating journey, I knew about appetite. We all have one. The problem with appetite is it can be mistaken for lust. As Dr. Larry Young and Brian Alexander discuss in their book The Chemistry Between Us, our appetites are often in conflict with thousands of years of laws and rules, moral teachings, manners, and self-imposed restrictions—all designed to curb passions. Don’t let self-inflicting rules stop you from being happy. Go after what you want with intense passion and don’t apologize for it.

INFORMATION IS USELESS WITHOUT A PLAN OF ACTION

I realized I had to have a plan of action because when I chose to wing it like I used to I was getting the same results. I wasn’t finding the quality women I wanted; I seemed to only be moving in circles. I wanted to find out what women wanted by figuring out what they didn’t want. Basically I started with a NOT to-do list. When you realize there is no written law to attracting women then you have no boundaries. The theory of inversion applies like so: Don’t ask what women want. Instead figure out what they don’t want.

What don’t women want?

They don’t want sloth in a man.

They don’t want un-ambitious.

They don’t want un-relatable.

They don’t want someone who lacks a sense of humor.

They don’t want unflattering.

They don’t want easy.

They don’t want mediocre or boring.

They don’t want liars.

They don’t want needy.

They don’t want unhealthy.

They don’t want to feel insecure financially or emotionally.

They don’t want someone with a lack of style and hygiene.

You can add about 100 others to this list. Once you have this list you are able to say, Okay which one of these do I need to work on? Brutal honesty with yourself is going to make all the difference in your success.

One of my mentors told me once, "If you have a goal invert it. Instead of doing all the little milestones you have to do in order to achieve that goal, instead avoid doing the things that won’t get you there." So how have I applied this concept to dating? Well, when I noticed that in order to get women you have to stand out but doing so in today’s dating world is quite a challenge. Most people think you have to be very witty with pick-up lines that will brainwash her to saying yes or manipulating touch to trigger some psychological weakness or that you have to be filthy rich in order to posses the power to buy whoever you want. That approach is not only ridiculous, but unrealistic. If that is what your perception is to get the woman of your dreams, odds are you are not going to find her. If you can’t open her eyes to you, she will never see you. Therefore you must open her eyes. Ponder those words carefully—that is where the power really lies. If you can grasp what that statement means, you’re halfway there.

What changed things for me is when I applied the principles I had learned in sales, social science and psychology, and most importantly when I knew who I was and when I had come to grips with emotional intelligence. My love life was like a business on autopilot. You see, dating is not as easy as it sounds. When you try and do something you’re not very good at without a solid understanding of how it’s conducted or without any guidance, how could you expect things to get better? Simply put, they won’t get better. We can only get better through knowledge, strategy, and action. Then with practice and repetition we get the results we want as long as we innovate along the way.

Maybe you wouldn’t want to date 40 women even if you had the time; you may be satisfied with only a few good quality women. Whatever your intentions are with my methods just be careful what you wish for. What you wish to receive is what you will get, so be clear with what you want out of this, whether it’s love or just sex. The reason you need complete clarity is because the law of attraction is powerful, probably the most powerful force in the universe. The law of attraction states, Like attracts like, what you actively seek is actively seeking you, you just have to take action.

PERSONAL STORY OF A GOOD FRIEND

I had coached one of my friends and had him implement my system and within his first month he started talking to five women. That’s a huge jump from zero women to five. He was actually uncomfortable because he didn’t know how to handle speaking with so many women at the same time. He preferred a smaller scale, which is totally fine! On his first date with one of these women I remember having to calm his nerves down, he was so excited and so nervous at the same time. He kept saying, She is out of my league. I hope I don’t blow it. He was reverting to the defensive mentality rather than offensive. So I gave him an exact plan to follow.

I told him, okay, look, at this time this will happen and at this time you will do this and so on. I gave him a play-by-play of the whole date. He called me afterwards a bit bewildered in tone. He had told me that the playbook I gave him worked to the T! I was so happy for him and a bit shocked that he literally followed the exact instructions I gave him and he got the exact outcome we had planned for. I expected him to improvise a little and wing it on some of things but he didn’t. That was powerful for me to hear. That’s when I knew I was on to something bigger for myself and for others. I was tired of the nice guys like my friend, time and time again finishing last or not finishing at all. I had to share my knowledge with people like him to benefit from. A mentor once told me, "You know, Sebastian, anytime you get into business you want that business to be a win-win NOT a win-lose. That is going to determine the amount of success