A Bolt of Loving

By C. D. Melley

He is a journalist for the newspaper of a university on Florida's Gulf Coast. She is a purveyor of the art of smooth jazz. No one would think they would be good together; however, upon a chance meeting in a club where she's playing, her soulful music entices him. There's only one problem: both of them have addictive vices which have been sticking points in their previous relationships. Can they look past each other's shortcomings to love one another for the works-in-progress they are? Can they overcome their demons to become better, and more attractive individuals to one another? Only "A Bolt of Loving" can be among their first steps on the road to recovery.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Douglas J. McLeod
• Release date: Dec 25, 2015
• ISBN: 9781524298838

Book preview

CHAPTER ONE

It was a warm Sunday morning in the Tampa suburb of Temple Terrace. Vince Greer was leaving his apartment on his traditional routine. He had his travel mug of coffee in his hand, as he locked the door, and proceeded to head out of his complex, and west on Fowler Avenue towards the main campus of the North Tampa University. On weekdays, he would complete this trek for professional reasons. However, he would also complete the 45-minute hike to the Campus for personal reasons.

He was wearing his usual electric blue ball cap embroidered with the logo of his favorite sports team, the professional hockey team which calls the area home, the Thunder. His short salt and pepper hair was concealed underneath the material. Vince was a tall guy; standing at 6 feet, 2 inches. On this February day, while the weather was warm, he was clad in a pair of blue jeans, and a green Polo shirt. He reached the corner of Fowler and 56th Street, and waited for the light to change, as he sipped on his hot beverage. He had lived in the area ever since he was hired to work at the University as a writer for the school newspaper. He was a beat writer for the School of Engineering, and would write articles on the latest developments within the branch of the institution, or outstanding students who have shone in their field of study.

Had this been a work day, he would stop by the coffee shop inside the school library, and place his usual order, a large dark roast, before heading across Leroy Collins Boulevard to his office. Alas, with it being the weekend, he brewed his morning Joe at home to consume during his walk to the northwest part of the Campus grounds. It was a slight inconvenience for him, but it was a trip he made religiously every Saturday and Sunday for the past couple of years.

Vince was thankful the rain had subsided before he left his apartment. Tampa was notorious for their intense pop-up thunderstorms, and one was occurring when he woke up this morn. By the time he had gotten dressed, the sun was shining again, so he decided to forgo his umbrella. The humidity made him debate on wearing shorts instead of his jeans, but he figured he’d spare the others in attendance the sight of his hairy legs.

As per his usual habit, he arrived outside of the meeting place earlier than intended. He took the opportunity to sit on one of the picnic tables outside, and sip on his coffee. It was a bit of serenity he enjoyed in the shade, and allowed him to be alone with his thoughts; which was not always a good thing to happen. Vince had done his best to control his thoughts so they wouldn’t venture back to his previous compulsive life. It was a road he had fought hard to stay upon, but every so often, they would creep down the dark alley, and he worried about returning to his old vices.

Ten minutes later, another member of the group arrived. A smile crept on Vince’s face as he recognized a familiar face. He extended his hand, and greeted the individual.

Brent, Vince said, how are you doing?

Brent shook Vince’s hand. I’m doing great, Vince, he replied. How’s work been treating you?

The same ole, same ole, Vince commented. Engineers are still creating stuff, and I’m still writing about it. Things have really been interesting ever since they got their new 3D printer.

Have they made anything worthwhile with it? Brent asked.

Nothing more than some miniature sculptures right now, Vince conceded. But, I think that’s more for showcasing in the lab window. Rest assured, if there’s anything actual of note, I’ll be there to report on it. Vince took another sip of his coffee. And, how are things in Brent’s life? Still busy at the restaurant?

Oh, you have no idea, Brent said. All of these Snowbirds coming down from Canada on their vacation. It’s great for business, but it cuts down on my free time.

We need to do something together sometime, Vince suggested. Something that will help you relax, and get your mind away from the hustle and bustle of the place.

Now, Vince, Brent hesitated, you know I can’t go to any Thunder games. Sports is how I got into my mess to begin with, and I’m afraid if I go to a game, it might be a trigger for me.

I know the deal, Vince sighed. Like they say, ‘Don’t test or tempt yourself.’ And, I wouldn’t want to go back down that dark path again.

Brent thought for a moment. Maybe we can go out to a club sometime? he suggested.

Vince was unsure. I don’t know, man, he said. I was never one for the bar or club scene. Those places make me feel uncomfortable.

I don’t mean like a dance club or anything like that, Brent countered. I mean, one of those places downtown that has live music; maybe a small house band or something. What do you say?

Vince pondered for a moment. He knew Brent needed a break from his daily grind, as did he. However, he still felt a little uncomfortable about the whole idea.

Maybe if we could get someone else to tag along with us? Vince queried.

How about we ask Kirk if he would be interested? Brent suggested.

That is if Maria will allow him out of the house, Vince mused.  You know how much of a tight leash she has around him.

Why don’t I invite them both? Brent posed. That way, she won’t feel left out, and she can keep an eye on him at the same time.

Vince smiled. Sounds like a plan, he resigned. Let’s hope they’ll both show up today, so we can run it past them.

They should, Brent replied. I have never known them to miss a meeting for as long as I’ve been coming.

A few minutes later, Kirk and Maria arrived outside the building where the two friends were chatting. Maria and Brent hugged each other hello; whereas, Vince and Kirk had a rather unique way of greeting one another. Vince removed his ball cap, and when Kirk went to shake Vince’s hand, the two friends would give each other a light butting of their heads. It had been Kirk’s tradition ever since Vince started attending the meetings at the Campus.

Brent and Vince discussed their proposal with the couple, and they agreed to get together the following Saturday night to hit one of the music clubs downtown. Maria noted that it had been a while since she and Kirk had a night out together; however, with it being with a couple of other members, it would be a nice night out for all involved.

A few more members arrived, and at the appointed time, the time lock deactivated on the doors to the building, allowing for everyone to enter the facility. The attendees gathered in the main foyer of the building where there were three tables set up in a single row, and chairs lined the sides. Brent fetched the bin where the necessary materials for the meeting were stored. A couple stragglers trailed in, and took their seats. Finally, the chairperson of the meeting, Nicole, arrived, and took her spot at the head of the table, and called the meeting to order.

Unlike most meetings one would believe would occur, there would be business matters that would be discussed. This was not one of those meetings, for this was a gathering of members in a 12-step program. All of the attendees had a common addiction they were trying to abstain from, in a bid to make their lives more manageable. The members would give therapy as to how their week had gone, and how they were taking steps into maintaining their own recovery. Everyone received an opportunity to speak about their trials and tribulations in order to handle their illness. When it came to Vince’s turn, he took a deep breath, and gave his therapy.

Things have been busy, as always, he stated. I try to keep my mind off of my problems by enveloping myself with work. I figure if I do that, I won’t have time to think about the damage the illness has caused me. I still can’t forgive myself for all of the pain and suffering I caused to not only myself, but to my ex-wife.

Vince attempted to compose himself. It had been three years since he came home from one of his binges to return to an empty home. The woman he had been married to for six years, Carolyn, had enough of answering calls from bill collectors, wondering when they could expect payment. While Vince was able to keep the essentials paid, like the mortgage to the home, and basic utilities, there was little money for anything else. The remainder of his paycheck would fund his addiction. While one would believe most of those funds would be spent at the nearby facility in Orient Park, Vince would finance the state’s own coffers through nearby convenience stores. However, that’s not to say he didn’t find himself hopping the #57 bus once in a blue moon to the hotel to feed his addiction.

After all of the lies and deceit Vince had peddled to her; after all of the failed bid after bid to delay the inevitable, Carolyn moved out, leaving Vince with only a chair and an end table. His life was in shambles, and he had nowhere else to turn. He looked to the ceiling, and asked God for help. He started seeing a psychiatrist at the NTU Health Center, Dr. Simmons. During the initial year of treatment, he convinced Vince to self-exclude from the facility in Orient Park. However, he still left the door open to return to the local convenience stores to get his licensed hits. Dr. Simmons was not impressed with Vince, so he suggested his patient start attending the regular Saturday and Sunday meetings at the nearby College of Behavioral and Community Sciences. Since then, Vince had not gone back, but he still got the odd thought and urge to go back.

Vince continued, I still hang onto the notion where Carolyn would take me back one day, once I’ve cleaned up my act. But, I get the impression she doesn’t want anything to do with me. I can’t say I blame her, after everything I had done to her. Hell, I wouldn’t want to be associated with me. All of the lies and cheating I partook in; she deserved a lot better. Regardless, I hope she would be willing to see the progress I’ve made, and at least reach out to me. I’m not saying she ought to; I cannot expect that. But, I would like to have the opportunity to extend an olive branch, and properly apologize for the atrocities I had committed.

Maria offered a comment once Vince finished his therapy. I cannot speak for Carolyn, she said. But, I know when my husband came clean to me about what he had done while in the grips of the illness, I was furious. All of the money, and struggling to make ends meet from month-to-month was not easy. However, I stood by Kirk because I loved him, and I appreciated the fact he decided to become honest with me. Now, I don’t know if you were ever honest with Carolyn during your battle, but if you weren’t, I would imagine she would be extremely hurt by the fact you weren’t able to do that. People can only take so much before they say, ‘enough is enough, and it’s time for a change.’

Vince nodded in agreement. That’s the sad thing. My ego and pride would not allow me to admit the illness had defeated me. In doing so, I lost the woman I loved. It wasn’t until I came into this room that I was able to finally surrender to my Higher Power, and confess that I was licked.

The meeting continued with others from the group sharing their therapy. After the session concluded, Brent, Kirk, Maria, and Vince headed to a nearby coffee shop to indulge in a light brunch. The four friends chatted about things which weren’t discussed by them in the meeting, but also to finalize plans for the following Saturday night. Brent agreed to pick Vince up, as Vince did not drive, as of yet; he was still in the midst of getting his license. Kirk and Maria would meet them outside the club at 7:30 in the evening for a night of good music. However, what Vince did not realize was it would be an outing that would start a change in his life.

CHAPTER TWO

As the weekend melded into the following week, Vince returned to his daily grind of working for the university newspaper. It was work most people would find boring, and one might argue Vince felt the same way. However, he saw it as a way to make a paycheck, and a means to keep himself away from his former vices. Granted, one would believe the notion he had money in his bank account, it would give Vince the means to finance his addiction. But, thanks to his recovery, he was adamant not to return to his old ways.

The only problem was, all he was doing was going to work, and his twice-a-week meetings. Vince needed a hobby to further keep his mind from wandering back to his past. All the while, he still hung onto the notion where Carolyn would be willing to take him back. The only problem was, he had not been in contact with her ever since she had left two years ago. He would write the odd letter to her, but Vince would never receive a response from his former wife. It was something that ate away at him, and prevented him from receiving the closure, or resolution, he needed.

It was something he made mention to Dr. Simmons during his latest appointment, which happened to fall on a Thursday during this week.

How would you feel if you ever received closure with Carolyn? Vince’s therapist asked.

The patient took a deep breath, and responded. I’m honestly not sure. I would hope she would take me back, but after everything I had done, I don’t know if she would, or not.

Dr. Simmons pointed out, There was a saying I heard once, ‘There are many guarantees in life, but life, in itself, is never a guarantee.’ You cannot go through life thinking about the ‘what-ifs’. You can’t dwell on the past, or get too wrapped up in the future. You can only live in the here and now. If you do, you will miss out on quite a bit, and leave yourself open to a possible relapse.

Vince rubbed his face, and nodded in agreement. You’re right, Doc, he said. I don’t want to go back to my old habits.

And, you’ve made so much progress in the past few years, the psychiatrist added. It would be a shame to throw all of that away because you had become complacent and let your guard down.

Vince replied, "Absolutely, I have to remain vigilant and