Feels Like Forever: Feels Like Romance, #2

By Roberta Ann Roque

Book 2 in the Feels Like Romance series.

When your heart's been broken, no strings attached sounds like a pretty good deal.

Miranda is a musical theatre has-been.  She’s been waiting tables ever since a bout with laryngitis stopped her career in her tracks.  She hopes that a fresh start in a different place will be what she needs to move on with her life.  She’s been trapped in a lukewarm long-term relationship for many years and now that she’s got out, she has no desire to go back.  No way.  She just wants some fun with no strings attached.

Jake is a photographer who is sick of making whiny kids and stressed out parents smile for the camera.  He wants to make art but he hasn’t been able to since his heart was trampled by his fiancee deciding to leave him two weeks before their wedding.  Jake’s been burned by love before and he has no intention of having it happen again.

When Miranda and Jake meet, sparks fly but neither of them wants anything but a good time.  But when difficulties pop up that drive them apart, they discover that maybe they both want something more.

Please note: This is a short, contemporary romance, stand-alone novella for adults 18 and over.  In this novella, just like in life, sometimes things get a little hot and steamy, if you don't like that, then you might want to try a different story.  And don’t worry, we hate cliffhangers as much as you do - this novella is guaranteed to come to a satisfying HEA conclusion.

approximately 28 000 words

80+ pages

An Excerpt from Feels Like Forever

 “It’s nothing, Miranda.”

“Of course, Jake, and we’re nothing too.  I’m not worried about your ex.  No strings, remember?”

I watched her finish the toast in two bites.

“I have to go anyway."

She was wearing a pair of my shorts and an old T-shirt of mine, and she looked absolutely gorgeous.  I followed her to the bedroom and watched her put on the black dress again.  She had nothing else to wear.

“I’ll drive you home.”

“It’s okay.  I’ll grab a cab.  It’s fine.”

In silence, I sat on the arm of the couch as she called a cab.

“Well, I better go wait down there.  Thanks, Jake.  I had a wonderful time,” she said, turning away from me to put on her coat.

I didn’t know what to say to reassure her, to calm whatever flurry of fear was storming inside of her.  But I had to try.

She was turning the handle to go out when I came up behind her and pushed the door shut.  She turned around, fidgeting with her mittens, not wanting to meet my eye.

I put my finger under her chin and tilted her head up.

“We are not nothing,” I said.  Then I kissed her with all the passion she stirred in me.  I put everything into that kiss — the longing, the desire for her body, and also the yearning for something more than just the physical bond we already shared.

She kissed me back with just as much fire, but with a touch of desperation — like it might be the last time.

She pulled back then, her eyes searching mine.  In a heartbeat, she was gone.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Roberta Ann Roque
• Release date: May 26, 2015
• ISBN: 9781513074320

Book preview

Author's Note

With each of the books in the Feels Like Romance series, I deliberately chose songs to inspire the story.  I picked songs that went with the theme, with what the characters were going through, or that evoked a certain feeling.  When writing certain parts I would sometimes put the song on repeat and listen to it over and over.

This is an inherent part of these books and is integral to the stories.  You will find as you continue through the series that there are many references to songs and music.  It's supposed to be like that.  That's how the series was designed.

If you are a musician or enjoy music - the way I am and do - you'll know that songs evoke emotions in a way that words never can.  So, I've listed them here, if you'd like to surround yourself with these songs as you read or when you come to the part where they are mentioned in the story.

I've linked to the Youtube videos of the songs so that you can listen to them for free.

Enjoy!

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Memory from the Musical Cats

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4-L6rEm0rnY

Think of Me from the Musical The Phantom of the Opera

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XfTgCPUJwRk

Closing Time by Semisonic

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xGytDsqkQY8

I Hope That I Don't Fall in Love with You by Tom Waits

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EtLVXBqfqBY

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Happily ever after is alive and well!

Sincerely,

Bobbi (writing as Roberta Ann Roque)

CHAPTER ONE

The Bar

Miranda

I stood at the bar, feeling hopeless.  Tapping my beer against my hand, I tried to follow what Kelsey and Moira were talking about.  When Kelsey had called, a girl’s night out had seemed like a brilliant idea.  But now that I was here, I was reminded again that I was twenty-seven years old, and the bar scene was getting a little tired.

I couldn’t even drink because I was the designated driver, so I had been nursing the same beer all evening.  Everyone else was getting drunk and just trying to hook up.  It seemed, at that moment, so very futile.  I wasn’t going to find Mr. Right here, so what was the point of even coming to this place? 

Whenever I examine my life, I try to be completely honest — after many years of deceiving myself in a not really good but not really bad relationship.  And the truth was that I was twenty-seven and still single. 

If I was being brutally honest, I would also admit that there wasn’t even one prospective Mr. Right on the horizon.  And I sure wasn’t going to find him here. 

Then, to make matters worse, the song Memory came on.  What the hell?  Someone must have requested it. "Memory" is only the most famous song from the musical Cats, and it was so not a bar song.  People started swaying slowly on the dance floor to the haunting melody. 

It took me back to when I had sung that song on stage.  I had been the understudy for Grizabella in Cats.  One night, the actress who played her had been puking her guts out thirty minutes before curtain call, and I had performed the entire show. 

It was one show, but I would always remember it.  It was the only lead I ever played before my career ended.  The pain of that loss overwhelmed me, and I suddenly found the noise and the press of the crowd intolerable.

Kelsey, I said, leaning over and shouting near her ear.  I’m going home.  I’m not feeling well.

What? she said, not hearing anything over the noise.

I’m going home.

You’re going home?

I’m not feeling well, I said loudly again.  Well, it was certainly true, though I hadn’t meant it quite the way she was interpreting it.  She leaned over and yelled in Moira’s ear.  They both made sympathetic faces. 

Can you guys get a cab?

Kelsey shook her head and cupped her hand to her ear.  I moved closer again and repeated myself.  She nodded.

Call me tomorrow, Kelsey said as I picked up my purse and slung it over my shoulder.  In a minute, I was outside on the cold, quiet city street.  There was a light snow falling, and I pulled my collar up.  I drew a deep breath and headed for where I had parked my car, feeling relieved to be out of there. 

I got in the vehicle, feeling slightly depressed.  This was what it came down to.  Leaving the bar early, sober, and alone.  With a sigh, I started the car and locked the doors.  Then I rested my head on the freezing steering wheel.  Fuck.  How had I ended up here?

I couldn’t help but think about my ex — Will — and his new fiancée, who just happened to be my sister.  No, it wasn’t like that.  It was mostly my fault.  And I didn’t begrudge them their newfound happiness.  I just wished I could have my happily ever after, too.

Since I was being brutally honest, I had to acknowledge that I had never even been in love.  What Will and I had wasn’t love.  It was friendship with benefits — a comfortable relationship that never demanded anything of us.

I wanted to fall in love.  I wanted to experience that amazing, desperate, head-over-heels rush for someone.  But I had a feeling deep in my gut that it would never happen.  That I would end up an old lady living with my cats and going to Will and Ceci’s for Sunday dinner, surrounded by children and grandchildren — none of whom were mine.

As I pulled out of my parking spot, I knew exactly what I needed: I needed to talk to Laila.

***

Did you just get back from the bar? Laila said when she picked up, not even bothering with a hello.

Yes, how did you...

And did you drive home?

Of course, I...

And I’m assuming you’re alone because you’re calling me.

Laila, I said, exasperated.  Will you stop interrupting?  Yes, all of the above, and that’s why I’m calling you, because I’m fucking depressed.

This isn’t about Will and Ceese, is it? she said.

"No, I’m over that.  I was over that before it was even over, Laila.  I’m not mooning after Will, and I’m glad that Cecilia’s happy.  That’s why I left Will, remember?"

Yeah, yeah, I remember.  So, what’s this call about?  Tell Dr. Laila, and I’ll fix you up.

I smiled, flopping on to the couch and kicking off my heels.

Aw, Laila, I wish you still lived in New York.  You never should have moved to take that job at Ceci’s restaurant.  I’m jealous everyday of her, getting to spend all day in your tell-it-like-it-is presence.

Yes, yes, I’m wonderful. You miss me.  I miss you.  We know all that.  That’s why we talk two or three times a week.  Now, quit avoiding the question, and tell me what’s got you so down, Miss Miranda.

I don’t know, Lails.  I guess if I had to describe it clinically, I’d say it was a general sense of malaise and that I want to meet someone.  And a specific sense of I’m horny, and I want to screw someone.

Mm, mm, mm, she said, and I pictured her shaking her head.  You’re not the kind of girl who should be abstaining, Miranda.  You’re a hot-blooded woman who needs her regular serving of sex.  When was the last time you were with a man? she said, using her best doctor’s voice.

About two months ago, with Colin.

"You slept with him?  I thought you said he was weasely."

He was, but a girl’s got to do what a girl’s got to do.  I broke up with him after a week of shagging.  He wasn’t that great.  But you know, it’s like pizza — even when it’s bad, it’s still good.

You sound so cold since you left Will, Miranda.  Don’t you want something more than just a quick fuck? she said, serious all of a sudden.  Maybe a new boyfriend?  A long-term relationship?

No, I said, almost yelling.  No, that’s the last thing I want.

There was silence.

I’m sorry for yelling in your ear, Laila, I said, feeling contrite.

That’s better.  Now, what are you talking about?  You’ve told me before that you’re done with the whole bar and one-night stand scene.  Doesn’t that mean you want long term?

I don’t know.  I’m confused.  At this point, I can’t see myself ever getting into a situation like what I had with Will.  You know, being boyfriend and girlfriend, getting an apartment, having Christmas with the parents, a date for Valentine’s, the whole nine yards... Although having a guaranteed date for Valentine’s is super nice to have — even if I hate the whole holiday.

That’s only because you don’t have a date anymore, Laila said, pointing out the obvious.

But that’s beside the point.  I really don’t want someone for just one night anymore, either.  The whole, he’s got no idea where my clit is, gets pretty annoying after a while, too.

So, what the hell do you want, girl?

I don’t know.  A guy who I could date that wouldn’t want any kind of commitment, ever.

There was silence again.

Yeah, there’s nobody like that out there, is there?

Au contraire, ma belle, there’s plenty of guys like that out there that would love to have a girlfriend like that, but I don’t think you’d want any of them.

I sighed.  Of course she was right.  It was ridiculous.  And why was I moaning to myself about not having children and grandchildren, if I didn’t want to have a committed relationship?  Kids usually involve commitment, at least in my family.  And I did want to be a mother, someday, and maybe a wife, too, just not right now.  The pain was too new, my humiliation too fresh to consider it in the near future.

If only I could find someone like that who was actually a nice guy.

"Yeah, if only.  And if only I was 120 pounds again,