His Saving Grace

By Jessie L. Star

“Who do you think you’re talking to here?” He interrupted me again. “Why are you trying to put this to me like it’s a normal thing when we both know it’s not? If you were a normal person taking a normal boyfriend home to a normal town to meet your normal parents, then it would be normal. As it is, this is just insane.”

Yep, Bridunna and my boyfriend, the two topics guaranteed to cause friction in, what was at all other times, the best of friendships.

Grace and Alex have been best friends for years, but now she’s returning to the small town repressed nightmares are made of with her boyfriend, and things between her and Alex are about to fall apart. It used to be them against the world, but years have passed and things aren't quite as simple anymore. Sequel to So Much to Learn.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Jessie L. Star
• Release date: Jul 8, 2014
• ISBN: 9781311782601

Jessie L. Star

Jessie L. Star hails from a family of voracious readers and talkers who all relish in a good story and a well-crafted squabble. She was born in a small town in rural Australia and so learnt early the value of making her own entertainment—in her case, writing stories. This remains her favorite form of entertainment, along with reading too late into the night, having her heart broken on a regular basis by her football team, and pestering her long-suffering friends into watching the numerous TV shows she’s addicted to. Jessie started writing online as a teenager and developed her style with the aid of a cohort of brilliant readers who provided a lot of helpful and encouraging feedback. She won six awards on Some Kind of Wonderful (SKoW)—an original romance awards site—and was inducted into the Hall of Fame. Her first completed original story, So Much to Learn, has over 1.3 million views on Fictionpress.com. Jessie writes romance stories full of snark, banter, a smidgeon of heartache, and people, ultimately, falling in love. She lives in Tasmania.

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His Saving Grace

Jessie L. Star

Copyright © 2014 Jessie L. Star

Smashwords Edition

All characters in this publication are fictitious and any resemblance to real persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental.

Cover art photo: Couple Holding Hands © Nikuwka. Licensed from Dreamstime.

Cover art design by the incredibly talented Master Ning.

Please note, this novel is written in Australian English and was originally published under the penname star123.

Dedicated to those who’ve been waiting so long for it!

Contents

Prologue – Grace

Chapter 1 – Grace

Chapter 2 – Alex

Chapter 3 – Grace

Chapter 4 – Grace

Chapter 5 – Grace

Chapter 6 – Alex

Chapter 7 – Grace

Chapter 8 – Alex

Chapter 9 – Grace

Chapter 10 – Grace

Chapter 11 – Grace

Chapter 12 – Alex

Chapter 13 – Grace

Chapter 14 – Grace

Chapter 15 – Grace

Chapter 16 – Alex

Chapter 17 – Grace

Chapter 18 – Grace

Chapter 19 – Alex

Chapter 20 – Grace

Chapter 21 – Grace

Chapter 22 – Grace

Chapter 23 – Alex

Chapter 24 – Grace

Chapter 25 – Grace

Chapter 26 – Alex

Chapter 27 – Grace

Epilogue – Grace

Prologue – Grace

Seeing a movement by one of the entrances, I watched Alex slip out hand in hand with Grace and I smiled slightly. So Much to Learn, Chapter 31.

~*~

Saturday 8 October, 2005

I felt a giggle bubbling up inside me as Alex tugged me away from all the people in the tent and out into the cool night air. It felt so exhilarating to just leave, to escape. I wouldn’t have dared do it without Alex, but with him I felt like I had the courage to do anything.

I clutched his hand tightly as he led me past all the torches and fairy lights twinkling through the Davenports’ garden, and out into the darkness beyond. With his long legs, Alex was easily able to jump the paddock fence before reaching back to hold two strands of wire apart so I could climb through after him.

Straightening, I looked at him, his pale face just about the only thing visible in the darkness, and then, by unspoken agreement, we ran. Our momentum propelled us over the uneven ground, and we leapt across the larger holes with smothered whoops. The cool air and the light wind, made stronger by our speed, made my eyes water and my lungs expand until I felt almost light-headed.

Gasping for air, we finally threw ourselves down under the solitary tree in the flat expanse of scraggly grass and lay flat on our backs, our chests heaving.

The ground was hard under my back and lumpy with what I hoped was rocks rather than sheep poo. It felt a bit damp, too, with early dew, and I knew my white dress was being ruined as I lay there. I didn’t care. In fact, I took a sort of rebellious pleasure out of it. I hadn’t picked the stupid dress, my mum had.

Mum would hate this, I muttered my thoughts out loud and heard Alex sigh next to me.

Your mum hates everything.

True, I conceded with a smile. "But she would especially hate this."

Kind of the point, isn’t it? I turned my head and saw that he was looking at me.

Not the point, I said slowly, but definitely an added bonus. He smiled then too and I felt my stomach give a familiar little swoop.

No-one else could get him to smile. He barely spoke at school and most people were scared of him, but even if it was my only talent, I was happy that getting Alex Coogan to smile was something I was capable of.

I’m leaving.

The swoop in my stomach turned abruptly into a nosedive and I sat bolt upright in shock and alarm.

You’re what? I demanded as a little voice inside my head started to chant no, no, no, no.

Leaving. Tonight, when that thing’s over. He gestured back towards the large marquee where most of our small town was packed celebrating the wedding anniversary of the local principal and his art teacher wife.

I can’t wait to get out of here. He was smiling again, but I got none of the warm and fuzzies I’d felt last time his lips had turned upwards.

Thanks a lot! I snapped, wrapping my arms around my legs, suddenly feeling the cold of the spring night where before it had been balmy.

What? He sat up as well, cottoning on to my horror at what he was saying. You knew I’d have to leave sooner or later. And, anyway, you hate it here as well.

No I don’t, I countered, my reply a gut instinct coming from some latent loyalty I hadn’t even known I’d had to my hometown. I mean, I tried to explain as he looked at me like I’d just grown another head, Bridunna’s not that bad.

Not that bad? He repeated incredulously. G, it’s a hole, we’ve always said that.

I looked around at the dry, cracked ground and familiar stark horizon, and then closed my eyes and breathed in the dusty, sweet scent that I could only ever associate with home.

It’s different for you, though. I opened my eyes again quickly as Alex spoke. He was watching me closely and I hoped the dark would hide my blush. It doesn’t matter how bad it is here, you still kind of belong. I never have.

You never wanted to. You never tried, I pointed out quietly.

I guess. He scuffed his feet into the dirt, releasing little dry clumps of earth and we sat there in silence for a few tense seconds.

You’re my best friend, G, he said suddenly, looking up, not at me, but at the vacant nothingness in front of him. "Not that that means jack because you’re my only friend. But, you know, for what it is worth…"

It’s worth heaps. I felt tears spike my eyelashes and, instantly forgiving him for his declaration that he was leaving, grabbed at his hand, my cold fingers closing tightly around his.

Yeah. He cleared his throat uncomfortably. But I’m not coming back here. Not ever. He gripped my hand back. So you’re going to need to move to the city, yeah?

As soon as I finish school, I promised, wishing as I had for weeks now, that I was the kind of girl with the guts to abandon everything she knew and run away.

I wasn’t, though, we both knew that. It’d taken every last scrap of my courage to follow him to the city a month ago, but then I’d really had no other choice. As he’d always defended me, that time it had been my turn to step up and put things right for him.

Remembering how that bus ride to the city had felt, though, and then, worse, the walking through the streets trying to find Alex’s sister’s place, made me feel physically sick. There’d been so many people and it’d felt like they’d all been staring at me.

Grace? As if to reinforce how impossible escape was, my mum’s crisp, authoritative voice suddenly carried out across the paddock. Where are you?

In response to her call, Alex and I both scrambled to our feet and looked at each other with mirroring expressions of frustration.

It’s like she has a homing device planted on you, Alex muttered, and I nodded.

So, I guess the speech must be over, I said, hesitantly.

I’ll be heading off soon, then, Alex echoed my thoughts.

We stared at each other through the darkness and it was as if I could feel some of the courage and strength I’d built up over the past year from knowing him splinter away; like it belonged to him and he was taking it back.

A tiny, gasping sob slipped through my lips at that thought and, with a soft curse, he stepped forward and awkwardly wrapped his arms around me.

It’s not that bad, he tried to reassure me as I started to cry for real. Come on, G, it’s going to come out good, I promise.

I shook my head against his shoulder, desperately wanting to be brave for him, but failing miserably. I’d obviously taken one step too far towards the pathetic for him, though, as he suddenly grabbed my shoulders and gave me a shake.

Pull it together, he said firmly. You’re going to have to deal with that lot, he gestured contemptuously towards the tent and the direction my mother’s voice had come from, on your own now, so you’re going to have to toughen up.

In response to his words, I swallowed the next lump of tears swelling in my throat and nodded wretchedly.

I’ve made you something. I looked up to see him fumbling in his pocket and the next second he pulled out a medallion about the size of a 50 cent coin made of polished, honey coloured wood. It had a hole at the top through which was threaded a length of black leather, and carved deeply into the centre were three small letters. AtW.

Against the world, I said, my voice hoarse from my little crying jag, but also filled with the little smile that was pushing at the corners of my mouth.

Yeah. He leant forward and slipped his hands up round the back of my neck to tie the ends of the leather. I closed my eyes and savoured the feeling of his body heat and the faint citrus, boy smell that was Alex. There.

He stepped back and I felt the token fall heavily against my skin where it sat just above the hollow between my breasts.

I reached up and ran my fingers over the smooth wood, tracing the grooves of the letters and feeling it already beginning to take on the heat of my body, as if it was a part of me.

I love it, I told him honestly. I’m never taking it off.

He shrugged self-consciously and shoved his hands into his pockets awkwardly as he always did when I complimented the stuff he made. It’s nothing.

No, it’s definitely something. I let my hand drop away from the necklace and, finding myself suddenly filled with the confidence he’d wanted for me, moved boldly towards him. When we were standing chest to chest, I reached up onto my tiptoes, holding onto his shoulders for balance, and pressed my lips against his in the way I’d been longing to for months.

I’d meant it to be a light, ‘goodbye and thank you’ kiss, but he surprised me by responded hungrily, pushing back against me and taking his hands out of his pockets to grab me by the waist. Stunned, but thrilled by his response, I moved my hands from his shoulders to twine around his neck and tilted my head to take the kiss deeper.

This was what I’d wanted for so long, but Alex had shown no signs of feeling the same way. We were best friends, but friends didn’t kiss like this, they didn’t press themselves against each other and hold on as if they never wanted to let go. So what did that make us?

Grace Andrews!

We sprung apart so fast I felt dizzy from the speed - or was that from something else? - and stared at my mother, standing there in her fancy cream pant suit, her face twisted into a grimace.

My hand shot up to my mouth, as if by hiding my red and swollen lips I could conceal what we’d been doing.

Mum! I squeaked, my eyes darting between her and Alex in horror.

It’s time to go. She held an imperious hand out towards me, but I hesitated. If this was my goodbye to Alex, I didn’t want it to end like this.

He must have felt the same because, with a long, deliberate look at my mother, he reached for me again and I stepped willingly into his embrace.

Bye, then, he muttered against my hair.

Bye, I replied, hugging him close for a couple of seconds and then reluctantly letting him go.

Come on, Grace. My mum’s hand clamped down upon my arm and started to drag me away.

I kept my face turned back towards Alex even as my feet stumbled in the other direction, and I was alarmed by how quickly he seemed to be fading into the darkness.

As if sensing that I needed this one last piece of reassurance, his voice came floating after me, Against the world, G.

I laughed then and rested my fingers against the wooden disc on my chest.

My mum could drag me away from him all she liked whilst I was 15 and living under her roof, but as soon as I was finished with high school, there was nothing in the world that would stop Alex and me being together.

Nothing.

Chapter 1 - Grace

Wednesday 9 December, 2015

Alex?

I dumped the heavy shopping bags I’d carried up his punishing four flights of stairs onto the grey lino in his kitchen with a relieved groan. Straightening, I felt the familiar weight of the wooden token on my necklace shift slightly on my sticky skin.

Out here, I heard Alex call back and, flexing my red hands to get some circulation back into them, I made my way through his sparsely furnished main room to the small balcony out the back.

Pulling back the sliding door, I was hit once again with that crazy heat, the one that had been beating down on my body all day and creating a sheen of sweat across my skin that seemed impervious to being wiped away.

Nice of you to let me carry the shopping up the stairs, battle with your lock and then lug everything inside, and not come out to help at all. I directed my sarcasm at Alex as I leant back against the doorframe and fanned my face with my hand. Casting a disparaging eye over his attire, I wondered how on Earth he could stand being outside in a pair of jeans. My own t-shirt and little denim shorts felt like a massive fur coat in this weather.

I didn’t know you were here, and the door was unlocked, he pointed out, shifting back against the rusted railing in a move that made my heart just about leap out of my chest.

"Yes, something I discovered after I’d struggled for about five minutes to turn the key." I grabbed his arm and pulled him away from the edge, not trusting the dodgy, old railing to be able to hold him.

Not a fast learner, then. He rolled his eyes at my protectiveness, but allowed me to steer him back inside, where it was a blessed couple of degrees cooler. So, what did you get? His eyes fell on the shopping bags and he started towards them expectantly.

Don’t get too excited, I warned him, going back round to the kitchen and hoisting the bags I’d brought up onto the counter. It’s mostly fruit and vegetables. I’m concerned you’re getting scurvy, I haven’t seen you eat anything green in months.

Bull, he responded mildly, poking about in the bags and wrinkling his nose as he pulled out an apple, you saw me bite into that lime after the tequila shots at your birthday a few weeks ago.

Yes, that’s very reassuring. I pulled open his fridge and shook my head when I saw that the only occupants were a couple of beers and an almost empty jar of salsa that was sprinkled with white mould.

Eat that, I ordered him, pointing at the apple he still held in his hand. I’m genuinely worried now.

Doesn’t it cross your mind that my fridge is so empty because I’ve already eaten all the nutritious things inside it? Alex asked, speaking through a mouthful of fruit.

No.

I eyed the healthy food in the bags and then the grimy looking fridge and let out a long-suffering sigh. It was obvious I was going to have to clean it out first. Flicking my eyes up to the small freezer door on top of the fridge, I pulled that open and, just as I suspected, was greeted by the sight of mountains of ice and a bottle of vodka wedged in between.

When was the last time you defrosted this? I demanded and then, as he looked at me blankly, I sighed again.

Seriously, we should just meet at the pub or your place if coming here is going to stress you so much. He finished the apple and chucked the core in the general direction of the bin, not seeming at all disconcerted when it bounced off the edge and rolled under one of the counters.

Alex! I remonstrated, and he held up his hands in surrender and went to pick it up.

~*~

If you were you my girlfriend, people would say I was seriously whipped, he grumbled half an hour later as he slammed down the last clean glass, glossy with washing up detergent.

I rocked back on my heels from where I’d been down on the ground wiping out the fridge, and smiled as I saw the small army of glasses we’d collected from around his small flat looking all nice and shiny. I wasn’t sure I’d convinced him of the merits of washing up more often rather than just nicking them from the pub he worked at part-time when he ran low on clean glassware, but it was definitely a start.

Good thing I’m not your girlfriend then, I remarked tightly, tipping my head to one side to see underneath one of the shelves better and satisfying myself that it really was as clean as it was going to get.

Beginning to pack all the food I’d brought neatly onto appropriate shelves in the fridge, I said in satisfaction, And, when it’s not so hot, we’ll defrost your freezer.

Can’t wait, he replied sarcastically, but I just smiled, getting to my feet and closing the fridge door firmly.

So, what now? Alex asked, looking around his now spick and span flat and scowling slightly.

Beer and TV? I suggested, lifting up the two longnecks I’d liberated from the fridge and passing one to him.

See, just when I think you’re a lost cause. His scowl cleared and then he clinked his bottle against mine and gestured for me to lead the way over to his newly cleared-of-clutter couch.

Settling down, he grabbed the remote, as was his way, and began to flick through the channels. While he did that, I tipped my head back, pulling my long, blonde ponytail up off my neck and pressing the cold bottle against the skin I’d just exposed. God, it was just so damn hot.

Sensing Alex’s gaze on me, I rolled my head slightly to look back at him. What? I asked as I saw the small smile playing about his lips.

You look like you’re about to melt.

"I feel like I’m about to melt, I agreed with him. I can’t get over how hot it is. Early December isn’t usually this bad."

Global warming, end of the world, etc, etc. Alex kicked his long legs out in front of him and slouched down further on the couch before tipping his bottle up and taking a long drink. After swallowing and smacking his lips in satisfaction something seemed to occur to him and he reached over lazily and nudged my knee, his knuckles brushing gently against my skin. With years of practice under my belt, I was able to stamp down on the flare of sensation this created without too much difficulty and concentrate on the words that followed.

Hey, thanks for the shopping. Don’t forget to let me know how much I owe you before you go.

Do the lawn at my place and give my car a quick check over sometime next week and we’ll call it even, I smiled as he rolled his eyes.

Not exactly challenging any gender stereotypes here, are we? He finally found a replay of a footy game from the weekend to watch, and there was silence for a few minutes as we both lazily trained our eyes on the TV.

I didn’t mind watching the odd game of football, but I couldn’t claim to be sports mad and it wasn’t too long before I found my attention wandering. Alex, however, didn’t seem to have any trouble keeping his eyes trained on the box, leaving me with the opportunity to study him.

It was funny how you stopped looking at those closest to you after a while. I mean really stop looking, to the point that someone could ask you what your best friend looks like and you’d draw a complete mental blank. It’d been so long since I’d actually taken in Alex’s features that I was almost surprised by the sharpness of his cheekbones and how long he’d let his reddy-tinged dark hair grow. Following the line of his body down, I smiled fondly as I saw he’d never totally gotten over the gangly part of his youth; there still seemed to be times when he looked faintly surprised at how far away his feet were.

Are you checking me out?

I lifted my eyes back up to Alex’s face to see him smirking and it was my turn to roll my eyes.

"Yes, that’s exactly what I’m doing," I said, trying to hide the fact that I wasn’t actually being sarcastic.

He scoffed, but as I’d known he would, didn’t force the issue, choosing instead to return his attention to the TV. I took a tiny moment, then, to appreciate just how much I loved our relaxed afternoons together, and just how rubbish it was going to be when I gathered up the courage to tell him what I’d actually come over to talk to him about.

We were each other’s ‘go to’ person, that hadn’t changed in the little over a decade we’d known each other. What also hadn’t changed, however, was that there were two things that were best for us both to steer clear of discussing. Unfortunately, what I wanted to tell him concerned both black-listed topics and was likely to prompt a somewhat less-than-positive reaction.

Still, I’d prevaricated long enough, and the longer I avoided telling him my news, the worse it would undoubtedly be. I just needed to bite the bullet. With that in mind, I reached over with one of my feet and gave his leg a gentle kick to get his attention again. When he looked over at me, I said, as if it was no big deal, I’m going to take Oliver to Bridunna for Christmas.

There was a beat of dead silence apart from the noise from the TV, but in the next second, Alex had stabbed the power button, making the screen go dead before shifting himself up straighter and turning to look at me incredulously.

"You’re what?" He demanded, immediately banishing any illusions I might have had about him taking the news calmly.

He’d obviously heard me so there was no need for me to repeat myself. I held his gaze, silently asking him not to be a dick about this, but not holding my breath.

Why the hell would you do that? He asked, not seeming at all affected by my unspoken condemnation.

Because Oliver has got it into his head that this is something we should do and I haven’t been able to talk him out of it, I answered in my head, although I felt that even something about that answer was off. Still, there was no way I was letting on that I had any hesitation so I replied calmly, We’ve been together for almost 6 months and he hasn’t met my parents, so-

"So you thought Christmas in bloody Bridunna would be a good way to introduce them? What, you want to parade him around the Christmas party and prop him up next to you at the Killara lunch? Christ’s sake, G!"

What? I asked, unable to stop the little snap in my voice. Yes, it hadn’t been my idea, and yes, I had moments of feeling sick to my stomach about the whole thing, but having made the decision, I needed support, not Alex verbalising my apprehensions. What is so wrong with me taking my boyfriend home to meet my parents? I admit that Christmas is a bit of a full on time of year, but it’s when we’ve both got a couple of weeks’ leave so that’s just the way it’s turned out.

Listen to yourself, Alex laughed mirthlessly. Introducing your boyfriend to your parents, fitting holidays into busy work schedules, you sound like you’re playing grown-ups.

"I’m not playing anything, I said, exasperated. It may have escaped your notice, Peter Pan, but we are grown-ups. I’m 25 and Oliver is almost 28, we both have jobs we have to work around and-"

Who do you think you’re talking to here? He interrupted me again. "Why are you trying to put this to me like it’s a normal thing when we both know it’s not? If you were a normal person taking a normal boyfriend home to a normal town to meet your normal parents, then it would be normal. As it is, this is just insane."

Yep, Bridunna and my boyfriend, the two topics guaranteed to cause friction in, what was at all other times, the best of friendships.

This isn’t an argument, Alex, I said slowly and steadily, forcing myself to take a step back and not blow the conversation out too far beyond either of our control. Yes, going back to Bridunna is probably going to take on a slightly traumatic edge at times, I paused as we both appreciated what that meant, but this is something Oliver and I want to do. Well, that was at least half true. Besides, it’ll be good to catch up with Desi again, and Jack and Talia will most likely be there with the girls so it won’t be as if I’m going back there without support.

It was a cheap shot bringing up his sort of adopted family in Jack and Talia, but if there was one saving grace for Bridunna from Alex’s standpoint, it was the Davenport family, and especially his older sister’s best friend, Talia Davenport, her partner and kids. Personally, I was most looking forward to seeing Desiree Russo, the daughter of the manager of my family’s property and my best friend after Alex.

Alex knew all my tricks, knew I’d only brought up Talia and co to get him to back off, but after several seconds of me holding his gaze sternly, he looked away.

So when are you heading up? It wasn’t the most gracious of defeats, but I’d take what I could get.

Next week, I said, forcing myself to not sound apologetic at the short notice.

He let out a sort of grunting noise and that was that, conversation over.

It was an unsettling interaction, highlighting all that wasn’t quite on song about us. Sure, I hadn’t exactly needed to ask Alex’s permission, and I’d put up a good front about not caring what his opinion was, but we both knew