Confessions Of A Catholic Re-Tread: A Journey In Faith

By Stephan Chappell

Everyone's journey in faith is different, but we do share some common experiences. I decided to share my story for those beginning a journey of their own. Understanding basic principles of the Catholic faith wasn't easy for me. The first portion of this work highlights the major stepping stones in my faith formation. I also examine my most common failures by reflecting on the ten commandments and the capital sins. Some may say I'm too willing to share past sins and failures. I believe confessing these truths give witness to transformation. I am a simple man and my way of viewing faith is simple too. If you are looking for a book of deep theology, there is a good possibility you've come to the wrong place. My work could be best described as a common man's understanding of Christ and His Church.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Stephan Chappell
• Release date: Feb 28, 2015
• ISBN: 9781311449382

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Confessions Of A Catholic Re-Tread by Stephan Chappell

Confessions Of A Catholic Re-Tread

Stephan Chappell

Copyright 2015 Stephan Chappell

All Rights Reserved

Cover Design by

Joshua D. Fultz

Joshua 24 Fifteen Design LLC

Special Thanks To

John Keys

Editor & Friend

Smashwords Edition March 2015

Smashwords Edition License Notes:

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A word to the reader-

This book consists of three parts.

The first portion chronicles some of the most significant issues I had to resolve while becoming a Christian.

Living a Christian lifestyle requires continuous conversion. In the second section we look at the challenge of applying faith to daily life.

The third portion of this book is an account of the sins I still struggle with.

For those who are cut from a similar cloth, this may be a nice read. For those who need a little direction, maybe my path can become your encouragement.

Peace be with you!

Table Of Contents

Preface

About The Author

The Not So Big Conversion Story

Church Going Doesn't Mean Perfect

A Life Of Prayer

The Unseen

Picking Up My Cross

Sharing The Faith

Friends With Collars

Ups and Downs

Confessions Of A Catholic Re-Tread

I am The Lord Your God; You Shall Not Have Strange Gods Before Me

You Shall Not Take The Name Of The Lord Your God In Vain

Remember To Keep Holy The Lord's Day

Honor Your Father And Mother

You Shall Not Kill

You Shall Not Commit Adultery

You Shall Not Steal

You Shall Not Covet Your Neighbor's Wife

You Shall Not Covet Your Neighbor's Goods

The Capital Sins

You Hypocrite

Preface

Confessions of a Catholic Re-tread is my testimony. If you're expecting a literary masterpiece, this isn't the book for you. I'm just an average guy from the Midwest, who at one time, thought all Christians were simple minded morons with an imaginary friend named, Jesus. I made fun of them, argued with them and discounted them as judgmental hypocrites. I am now a practicing Catholic. I decided to document this process for my children, and anyone not feeling spiritually fed by their Catholic faith.

Sometimes I hear stories about people who get saved and bam their life is bliss. For me it wasn't like that and it certainly wasn't quick. I've always been a little leery when someone makes what appears to be an instantaneous conversion. I'm not saying it's impossible. I'm not trying to downplay people who find their faith and change their lifestyle immediately. I don't know why. One doesn't have to look far into the New Testament to find examples of Christians who have redirected their lives to Jesus at the drop of a dime. Peter and Paul come to mind immediately. Imagine young Peter standing there at the sea shore and saying, Drop everything and leave? Yeah man I'm with ya. Let's go.

What if you were Paul and Jesus knocked you on your butt and took your sight? You'd convert pretty quickly, wouldn't you? Extreme situations tend to result in extreme conversions. When the Holy Spirit changes someone I guess it depends on the person and their situation. Still though, it seems like the people who spontaneously achieve spiritual transformation can fall back just as quickly to their old lives. Conversion often happens when people are in a position of vulnerability or weakness. People seem to find God when they're down on their luck. Maybe faith is just what they need to get back up again. God just picks us right up.

For me, faith didn't come quick or easy. When the Holy Spirit calls us, sometimes we answer the call. Sometimes we yell back, STOP CALLING LEAVE ME ALONE!

When I answered the call a transformation began. But unlike those who are lucky enough to transform immediately, my faith started small. It was like a tiny piece of me that grew and grew and grew. Faith struggled to touch my heart. Faith battled with my mind and it ran head-on into my environment.

The process was more complicated than simply going to Mass and remembering to pray. There were highs and lows in my journey. There were so many issues I had to resolve along the way. Every time I made an effort to learn more, I gained insight about myself as well as God. Sometimes the knowledge I gained was hard to swallow. Sometimes it was enlightening. It certainly challenged my pride.

I've never considered myself to be a bad guy. Those who knew the old me would probably say I was a pretty good fella. Those who know me now generally say the same. But I am no doubt a sinner.

About The Author

It's 4:30AM on Saturday morning and the church basement of St. James is alive. Men from all over town come to a weekly Mens program to talk religion. Although the program starts at 6AM, several of us show up long before to cook breakfast for the attendees. Some of the best conversations unfold at this early hour over coffee and cooking. One particular conversation happened to name this book.

I don't really qualify to call myself a convert because I was baptized as an infant. At the same time, I didn't grow up in a Catholic household and don't identify with the Cradle Catholics. In good humor I asked an older guy, what would you call someone like me? What do you call the ones who have been Catholic since birth but separated from the Church?

The man's name was John, and I think he is probably in his early 70's. Standing there in the kitchen, John looked up at me with a boyish grin and said, Re-tread. You're a Catholic re-tread!

I liked the idea from the moment he said it. I'm not a convert! I'm not a revert! I'm not born again! I'm a whole different species of Christian. I am a Catholic Re-Tread!

Why am I a Re-Tread and not a Cradle Catholic? My life started out quite Catholic. My parents both came from Catholic families and went to Catholic schools. My paternal grandfather was a Deacon. In fact, all of my uncles and aunts grew up living next to their church. I was the very last child baptized at Saint Peter and Paul Catholic Parish before it closed. I had two married parents, a big family support system, and everyone was Catholic. From there on, well, not so much. The folks grew up in a time when traditional Catholic values were a part of the culture. But the Catechesis of young people wasn't all that great for their generation. People knew the rules of being Catholic as they were passed down through the generations, but some struggled to really understand the faith.

My parents were born in the 50's and were teenagers in the 70's. Directly in the middle of this period, the Catholic church experienced a tremendous change. The Second Vatican Council was the driving force of this change. Much like any organizational changeover there were some issues. We've all experienced a changeover of some sort in the work place. Even though the idea behind the change may be good, it doesn't mean the change is facilitated flawlessly. Something was missing for many who grew up just after the 2nd Vatican Council. The Church was adjusting and America was changing too.

For those who aren't familiar with Vatican II, this was the period when the Mass went from Latin to English in the United States. There was literally a day (November 29, 1964) when the Priest no longer faced away from his people during the prayers of the Mass. They showed up one Sunday, faced the people and spoke the prayers in English. Many Catholics attended the Mass every week, but did not know Latin. How hard would that be for a young person? Picture a choir of kids singing hymns in Latin, and unaware of the words they were singing. Imagine a lifetime of attending the Mass in a language you don't know. The change brought on by Vatican II was widely regarded as a good idea, and I believe it was. Of course people used the change as an opportunity to relax many of the disciplines of the faith. Something was lost in translation.

One might think a generation who grew up around this change would be better taught than generations prior. Not necessarily, from what I'm told that wasn't the case. Many of the kids who grew up in this era were taught a very watered down version of Catholicism.

I can't really say first hand whether the quality of Catechism my parents received was good or bad. What I can say is they were divorced by the time I was three. This is why I grew up outside of the Church. Over the years, I've had to wrestle with the Church's teaching on divorce and marriage. I felt like my Mom was pushed away for getting divorced. For those who aren't familiar with Catholic marriage there are a few things you should know before I continue.

The Church teaches that the only way for two legitimately married people to separate is via death. I guess there is one other way. It's when the wedding never really happened. What? What the heck does that mean? When two people stand there and make their vows, they must have full knowledge of their act. Not only do they have to understand what they are promising God, but they also have to intend to keep those vows when they make them. Seems logical. Wouldn't that always be the case? Unfortunately it's not.

For example, a man may promise to be faithful at the ceremony but never really intends to keep that promise. Just going through the motions is a way some marriages can be considered invalid. Evidence of this invalidation would be infidelity soon after the wedding.

The issue over divorce and annulment in the Church can be complicated. It is also one of the most challenging to understand because it impacts the souls of both parties involved, not just their practical lives. This includes people in a bad situation through no fault of their own.

Consider this, if a couple were married for 25 years and one day the husband or wife says, I'm not happy and I'm leaving. This would most likely be considered a valid marriage. Therefore a divorce may not be granted by the Church. What about the person left alone? Are they supposed to remain alone? That doesn't seem right. It never sat well with me. Was my Mom supposed to raise me alone?

Let's look at it from the Church's perspective. The main mission of the Church is to get people to heaven. It would then, never ever be appropriate for the Church to issue a doctrine which defies what Jesus spoke when teaching. So what did Jesus have to say about divorce? Was he vague or direct?

Some Pharisees approached him, and tested him, saying, Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife for any cause whatever? He said in reply, Have you not read that from the beginning the Creator 'made them male and female' and said, 'For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh'? So they are no longer two, but one flesh. Therefore, what God has joined together, no human being must separate. They said to him, Then why did Moses command that the man give the woman a bill of divorce and dismiss [her]? He said to them, Because of the hardness of your hearts Moses allowed you to divorce your wives, but from the beginning it was not so. I say to you, whoever divorces his wife (unless the marriage is unlawful) and marries another commits adultery. [His] disciples said to him, If that is the case of a man with his wife, it is better not to marry. He answered, Not all can accept [this] word, but only those to whom that is granted. Some are incapable of marriage because they were born so; some, because they were made so by others; some, because they have renounced marriage for the sake of the kingdom of heaven. Whoever can accept this ought to accept it. -Matthew 19:3-12

Based on the words of Jesus himself, the Church could never condone a divorce. But what percentage of the billions married throughout history really understood what marriage meant on a spiritual level? It is a challenge just to understand marriage on a worldly level. Do we fully grasp what God expects of us in marriage? The number one job of a married person is to get their spouse to heaven.

With knowledge of the Lord's teaching, divorce is not an option. The Church doesn't have the authority to dissolve a marriage. But it is tasked with the challenge of preparing those who wish to enter into marriage. Sometimes people aren't properly prepared but it isn't necessarily their Priest's fault. Catholics have a duty to educate themselves too.

Most Catholics who get divorced basically fall away from the Church. They don't have to. The challenge arises when someone wants to re-marry after separating from their spouse. Based on what Jesus told us, this is not possible unless the marriage was invalid to start with. This situation leads to the Church being portrayed as the bad parent. The happiness of love is starring someone in the face, and the Church can not endorse their remarriage. Generally, they (the Catholic) just go and marry in a different church.

And so we return to my story. My Mom asked about an annulment so my Stepfather could marry her in the Church. Someone of authority told her an annulment wasn't going to happen. From that moment on there was no religion spoken or taught in my household. For the rest of my life, I only experienced the Mass at midnight on Christmas Eve. My Grandparents made us go. At the age of five my Mother married my Stepfather. He wasn't a Christian, but he was a blessing. He promised my Mom he would raise me as his own and