The Simple Book of Nothingness

By Thomas W. Harding

This book is a collection of ideas, thoughts and poems reflecting on life, ego, love, and spirit. Life is a search for truth in all areas. I have been on my quest for some time now, and have had amazing insights, set backs, revelations, and mood swings. This book is random, but with an underlining theme of wonder. Much of the writing period I was going through major life changes, from loosing my job, to going back to school, having major surgery, out of body experiences and challenging my core beliefs about life, God, religion, healing and purpose.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Thomas W. Harding
• Release date: Oct 24, 2014
• ISBN: 9781310529139

Thomas W. Harding

When I was 17 years of age, I was wishing daily for death. I wanted death to free me from my depression and self-loathing. Life had lost all meaning and I was a shadow of myself. I spent most of my time alone, wandering about aimlessly, looking for something to change. I was smoking weed on a fairly regular basis as were most of my friends. I needed to break free, but didn't know what to do. One day in March I think, I wanted/needed to go to a place I found peace called the Gibraltar Rock in Lodi, Wisconsin. I first went to my friends house, but he was gone, so I drove up alone. One of the reasons I liked the Rock so much was the hike to the top. I was able to think clearer and often would feel better once I reached the top. This time was different. I was trying to sum up the strength to commit suicide once I was at the top. The Gibraltar Rock is a 100 foot cliff and I really wanted to jump off. To free dive into infinity.When I arrived at the top, I was more open to seeking an answer instead of just jumping into the dark unknown. I stood on the ledge, looked out of the beautiful landscape that stretched out over the valley from Lake Wisconsin to Lodi, and I asked my dead brother, Johnny, a question, since he was the one I envied, I asked, "Give me one good reason not to jump." Instantly, a voiceless voice that was less then a whisper came to my mind in answer, "If you jump you will kill your parents, too." This answer was a dread to receive, but also one I could not ignore. I loved my parents and always tried my best to make them happy, how could I now kill them?So in response I pulled the bag of weed from my jacket and threw that off the edge, turned and proceeded back down the trail to the car.

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why do i

Why do I seek pain?

Pain brings comfort, it brings acceptance.

But why?

I don’t know.

Perhaps I should let that go.

Good idea.

I Pray You May

I pray you may forgive me

I was too stubborn to see

The truth of who I am

I tried to win your heart with lies

Tonight I cry

You may forgive me

Though I do not deserve your grace

Tonight I lie, alone

Tomorrow I go to start anew

A new way to be

I pray you may forgive me

If I have caused you to mistrust more

I cannot forgive myself

But I will try

Damn Dirty Dog

I am up at 5 am. It’s a beautiful morning. The stars are out in full glory, as if Heaven herself is sleeping in a peaceful dream. I walk the long beach with my golden girl Josie, my dog. I see a shooting star. What a strange direction it shot; usually, they come from the East this time of day—not that I know much about such things. I make a special wish, one I know will be granted. I'd share it with you, but then it would be lost.

Josie and I stop and gaze at the morning sky. Well, I gaze, Josie sits and looks about as I pet her. We sit for a while, then start heading home.

Josie spots a rabbit and tears off after it. I continue towards home, knowing she can find her way. I stop at the drive, and peer into the darkness behind me. No sign of her. I whistle, still nothing. I head into the house, She knows her way, I think to myself.

Sure enough, she pops in through the doggy door a minute later, happy as can be. I look, she is covered in water, mud, and, oh man, the smell of dead, rotten fish.

What did you do?! I yell.

She runs for her couch, tail between her legs.

Oh, no you don't. You don't deserve to live in this house smelling like that! Get out!

She won't budge.

Get out of this house! I shout, grab her by the collar, and pull her out. You don't deserve to live in a home smelling like that, damn it! I quickly close the gate, and slam the door shut behind me. Bang! I block her doggy door closed. She wants to smell like that, she can live in the yard. Damn dog! I grumble to no one. She can wait outdoors until I'm good and ready to bathe her.

Meanwhile, it's time for my breakfast. I cook up a beautiful, little meal, and