Teach Me

By Bertha Thyng

Jessica McGuire lives a life of blessings. She‘s beautiful, smart and accomplished, but something is missing. Throughout her life, she has never learned to let go and trust in love. A workaholic to the core, she convinces herself that focusing on her education and reaching each level of achievement is the way to honor her commitment to God. Relationships are pushed aside in her quest to reach each goal she has set for herself. However, in completing the tasks she believed were right and would honor God, she begins to question herself. Does her level of commitment to achieving goals show obedience to God or have they become an obsession? Did she miss out on God’s plan for her life and her happiness or has He been trying to get her attention lately?

• Language: English
• Publisher: Bertha Thyng
• Release date: Oct 6, 2014
• ISBN: 9781311326829

Bertha Thyng

Bertha Thyng was born and raised in Versailles, Missouri. She grew up on a farm northwest of town and spent her days riding horses, walking and playing in the woods and (more often than anything else) reading and writing.One of five children still at home, there was always something going on somewhere on the farm. Whenever possible, she liked to crawl out of her bedroom window onto a lower roof on the back side of their two-story farmhouse. While there, soaking up sunshine, she would read and write.She later served as a newspaper editor in Central Missouri, did some freelance work for various magazines and newspapers, as well as providing editing and ghost writing services privately.In addition to being a mother of five, one of her greatest joys now is spending time with her grandchildren. She is married to Roger Thyng of Mack’s Creek, Missouri.

Book preview

Chapter One

A smattering of students wandered the stacks and Jessica McGuire liked it that way. It meant she was alone with her research. The university library, with its polished wood and smell of thousands of manuscripts, was as familiar to her as home. Countless hours were passed within its walls absorbing each volume like a new adventure to be savored. She had been there for a couple of hours already, but she continued to carefully make notations from a text, enclosing passages in quotation marks and meticulously recording the information she would later include in her bibliography.

She really should have acquired the habit of carrying around a laptop to make her notes, but she wouldn’t find the same satisfaction in typing as she did in filling each page long hand, at least not in the library. The library was a place of perpetual dedication. The volumes that filled each shelf spoke of countless years of toil by others that demanded a certain amount of respect. Tapping away incessantly on keys only disturbed the reverence required in such a place, at least in Jessica’s opinion. She had her computer at home when the time came to compile her notes in an orderly and prompt manner.

A long, graceful curl fell forward over Jessica’s forehead, and she pushed it back into place while adding the page to a box containing a three-inch pile of notes at the same time. The box had been her constant companion throughout the past few months. Every time she had tried to leave it behind, she ended up needing to check her notes, so she began carrying them on each trip to the library. Leaving it behind may mean she would leave something important out of her research and that was not an option. Jessica never did anything half way. There was something within her that prevented her from stopping on an assignment until she was completely satisfied she had exhausted every avenue of exploration. That exploration didn’t stop when the class was over. She didn’t need to be enrolled in classes to continue to learn. It was strange, even she admitted. However, it was important for Jessica to make the best use of the simple gift of being able to learn. It was this same dedication to her work that allowed her to finish her bachelor’s degree ahead of time and allowed her to hold a full-time teaching job while working on her master’s. Of course, she wasn’t finished; she planned to begin work on her doctorate in the next year.

She stretched the kinks from her neck and shoulders, taking a moment to relax. Her routine was simple. Jessica would spend time just talking to God and reading the Bible during morning devotions. The day always seemed to go better when she made time for God first thing. After that, she would hit Starbucks; teach classes until three o’clock; stop by Starbucks for a second burst of caffeine; do research, take college classes, teach literacy classes on a volunteer basis or participate in a community theatre group when time allowed. She always made time to attend church, and had been involved with its drama ministry since coming to New York. She also was in the habit of picking up Chinese food to cap off the evening an average of two nights a week. She admitted it was a rut, but she could stand a little routine when Chinese food waited for her at the end of that rut.

To break the routine, she frequented live theater performances, favoring Christian plays or comedies and Shakespeare, of course. Occasionally, Jessica performed in community theatre, taking supporting roles just for fun. Her volunteer work in the community theatre was one of her most fulfilling at times. She and other volunteers were able to take teenagers, who may not have much of a chance of knowing their potential, and teach them to express themselves on stage rather than finding other outlets for their energies. After three years of service to the theatre, two of the students who frequented the shows had enrolled as drama majors after high school. It was through their enthusiasm that Jessica found even more joy in her work at the theatre, even though history, and particularly biblical history, was her real passion.

Tell me, a woman’s voice spoke from behind, What would possess someone to spend all their free time digging through musty old books if they didn’t have to? You should be having fun.

Jessica smiled, recognizing her sister, This is the fun stuff, Cathy. Leaning back in the polished oak chair, Jessica patted the chair next to her.

Shaking her platinum blonde head and scowling, Cathy plopped down. Well, I see the problem. You need a dictionary because you don’t have a clue to the meaning of the word ‘fun.’ It’s obvious I need to save you.

Oh? From what? Jessica played dumb and marked another passage.

From yourself, of course. Look around you, Jess. What do you see?

Humoring her, Jessica glanced around the library. She breathed in the scent of leather and paper and exhaled with a content sigh. I see miles of books and tons of notes I still would like to compile.

Cathy immediately deflated. Wrong answer. What you see is an empty library. Do you see anyone hanging around? Are there crowds of people sitting at these tables? Nope. The regular bookworms aren’t even here. Want to know why?

Not really. Jessica eyed her sister with a mixture of trepidation and suspicion. As children, Cathy served as a partner in crime, and she had the uncanny knack for getting the two of them in trouble. There was a recklessness to Cathy’s way of approaching life. Not once had she made any advance plans. The fact that she chose to attend the same university as Jessica had been based on the fact that they had an aunt living in New York who could provide the two with an affordable place to live, off campus. It wasn’t that Cathy wasn’t smart. In fact, Jessica knew her sister was quite intelligent. She simply chose to apply her intelligence in different ways than Jessica. Cathy’s favorite part of being in New York was the endless shopping opportunities available. It didn’t have anything to do with earning a top-notch education.

Still, Jessica couldn’t fault her little sister. Cathy hadn’t made any promises about her education. This was her fifth year, and she would earn her bachelor’s degree by next spring, all things considered. At least she would finish. Cathy was notorious for taking on a new project or hobby only to drop it after a few months. Most hobbies or projects took time and dedication. Those elements took on different meanings for Jessica’s sister. A long time might only be a few weeks for Cathy. She wanted to be happy, and no one knew where to find happiness better than Cathy.

Undaunted, Cathy continued. Because most people have something better to do on a Friday night than sit around reading dusty old books.

So, I’m a little twisted.

Twisted is good, Cathy nodded, but this--this is just plain sick. She looked down her nose. You know, you don’t look like a bookworm; you aren’t nearsighted; you look like an auburn-haired Malibu Barbie doll, even though you can eat like a horse--

Watch it with the eating jokes, Jessica interrupted, grinning at her sister. Besides, if I looked like a Barbie, I’d be a size two not a six.

Never were their differences more apparent than now. Although both women possessed the same slender build and the same fine bone structure, Jessica’s hair was a flaming auburn, so filled with red highlights it came to blazing life in the sunlight. Each strand glinted with liquid radiance and the slight tendency to curl could be as much of a curse as a blessing. Cathy‘s hair was strawberry blonde, straight and flowing past her shoulders. Where Cathy had crystal blue eyes, Jessica’s deep green eyes were fringed with thick, dark lashes. Even their complexions were opposite. Cathy was fair, like the fairy princess of a story book, and Jessica had inherited the dark tan of her Cherokee ancestors on their mother‘s side of the family tree.

Jessica made a face at her younger sister and shuffled pages around the table top. I only had a little fine tuning to do on my thesis.

Jess, I read your thesis. It’s great. It was great when you submitted it--at the end of the semester. May I remind you this part of your life is over? You earned your master’s. It’s time to stop. Please. You’re only hurting your baby sister by carrying on like this. I pray that I never have any of the same professors. Look at this. She indicated Jessica’s three-inch high pile of notes. You should get an ‘A’ just for taking the time to write all this stuff down.

Jessica shrugged in response. I thought of something new I wanted to check out. I’d explain it to you, but you wouldn’t be interested.

You got that right. Cathy smiled, proudly.

"‘Blessed are those who find wisdom, those who gain understanding." She stopped her sister when she would have interrupted. "For she is more profitable than silver and yields better returns than gold.’ Proverbs 3:13-14."

Stop that. You know I hate it when you do that. It makes me feel guilty for not being able to remember Bible verses, Cathy grumbled.

Jessica flipped the text shut and started organizing notes. So why are you here? I can’t imagine you’re here to study.

Well...no. Actually, I came to ask a favor.

How did I know this? Jessica began stacking texts and organizing papers more quickly. Every time you say that, I get nervous. The warning signs included phrases such as I need a favor, I’ve been thinking about something, I have a tiny question to ask or--the absolute worst--I’ve got a great idea. If Cathy ever uttered those words, trouble inevitably followed.

Her sister rolled her eyes--a technique she often employed with their parents whenever she tried to be cute. It isn’t that kind of a favor. You know Max? Of course you know Max. Max and Cathy had been dating for more than a year, so it was a silly question. Max had been the one true constant in Cathy’s life so far.

You mean Max the Magnificent, Max the Marvelous, Max the--

That’s the one! Well, his brother is having a party and Max wants me to go with him.

Yeah, like you two haven’t been joined at the hip for how long now? So, you want to borrow some of my clothes?

No. It’s...more like I want to...borrow you.

Jessica’s eyebrows shot up. Excuse me?

Cathy giggled. It’s for a double date. You see, Max has a friend--

No way. This was another touchy subject. Cathy’s goal in life was to see Jessica find someone, settle down and raise two-point-three children, perhaps even have a dog. Jessica, in turn, had spent years dodging the bullet.

Jess, you have to see the guy--

I’ve told you before. I do not go out on blind dates. Too many dating disasters and too little time to find someone with whom she enjoyed being with had put a damper on her social activity while living in New York. There wasn’t a shortage of men--just a shortage of men who were on the same page as Jessica. Relationships were usually short lived or more of a friendly nature than something more meaningful. She had tried to develop relationships, but most men weren’t ready to share time with church, her research, the kids from the reading class and the theatre group. She really didn’t understand why.

Jessica rose to leave, but Cathy grabbed her arm. Jess, I just don’t know if I can make it through this party without you there for moral support. Cathy had started to whine, another of her talents.

After placing the books on a nearby cart, Jessica turned to face her sister. What’s the problem? Who’s going to be there...the president?

Well...no, but there will be someone you would like to meet.

Do tell, was Jessica’s flat-toned response. She slipped the light jacket over her shoulders and pulled her hair, which nearly reached her waist, through the collar.

Benjamin Morgan. Cathy paused. You know. The archeologist.

I know who he is. Jessica secretly admitted she would like to meet Benjamin Morgan. She had read everything he had ever written. While most men his age were content to write about the adventures of their younger days, Benjamin Morgan preferred to keep pushing forward. One of his favorite things to do was to take a location most others thought had been worked over completely and dig a little deeper until he unearthed a rare treasure. In many ways, he was similar to Jessica in that sense because neither one of them seemed to know how to give up.

So, you’ll come.

I didn’t say that. Having her sister fix her up made Jessica feel a little like the wallflower spinster for whom people feel sorry. Growing up, Jessica never had any shortage of companions, but even she had to admit the past few years had been pretty sparse. She probably could count the number of dates she had accepted lately on two hands. Cathy was the outgoing daughter in the family. She was the type who fretted all night if she didn’t have something lined up on a Friday evening, while Jessica sometimes was just as happy to spend the night cuddled in a blanket reading.

Oh, come on, Jess. It’s a wonderful opportunity. Besides, Dom really wants to meet you.

Dom?

Dominic Scolari. Your date. I told him you wouldn’t pass up a chance to meet the great Benjamin Morgan.

Oh, Cathy, you didn’t. Jessica spoke in an agitated whisper. Cathy! I don’t even know this guy. I don’t really even know Max very well.

I figured you would say that, and you do, too, know Max. Besides, I had Max and Dom wait outside. This way, I can introduce the two of you. Maybe we can go get something to eat and kind of break the ice.

Jessica pushed the strand of loose hair away from her face. Her mind flashed to another time. She had been looking for a book in the stacks, and she happened to overhear a conversation. Two young men were discussing a hot babe, as one referred to the female in question. It took a few moments and some clues about the woman’s appearance before Jessica realized they were talking about her. She remembered the feeling of gut-wrenching shock when she made the connection, but it was the last of the conversation that hit her the hardest. One man said he was going to walk right over and ask her out. The other just laughed. Forget it, man. That’s the ice queen. No one gets past her quick freeze. Part of her wanted to push the books through the shelf on top of their feet, but she opted to round the corner instead. The pregnant silence that filled the aisle was worth more than physical violence. Her lifestyle left little time for social engagements, but what good would it do to try and explain that to the Neanderthal set. I like ice, she said in the same flat, somber tone.

Cathy’s face fell. Please, Jess. I know I’ve been joking, but I’m dead serious. This makes me so nervous. It’s Max’s family. I’ve only met them casually off and on, but this is an important night for me. I need you there.

Jessica employed a calm exterior with Cathy as she tried to weigh the consequences of accepting a blind date. The last time Jessica had allowed Cathy to persuade her had been when Cathy first arrived in New York. It had been more than a disaster. Not only did he talk about nothing but himself and his body-building efforts, but his idea of the ideal date was to hang out in the weight room at the university.

Still, was it worse to be known as the ice queen?

Jessica had never considered herself to be a cold person. Throughout high school, she had been the typical teenager, hanging out with her friends and going out every weekend. Her faith had kept her in check, though. When some were tossing back beers at parties, she steered clear of that kind of activity. She supposed there were a few who saw her as the proverbial stick in the mud, but she never let that bother her. There was something bigger and more important, such as trying to lead a life that was pleasing to God. It was a daily struggle at first to keep her eyes and ears open for God’s direction, but over time she learned to wait more patiently for God to unfold His plans for her. Of course, she didn’t always succeed, but she did try. Later on, she devoted so much time to her studies and other interests, she pushed her social life aside. She convinced herself it was enough to live a life of salt and light. Jessica set goals of finishing college early, serving God in whatever way He led her to serve and finding a career that made her happy. They were simple goals, really. She had enjoyed teaching, selecting a position at a nearby high school and teaching freshmen the intricacies of the Constitution among other things. But there was something still missing.

There were times when she wondered if, by keeping so busy, she was ignoring another part of God’s plan for her. Always wanting to listen for God‘s direction, she sometimes wondered if He had tried to get her attention in matters of relationships and she had been too blind or stubborn to pay attention. She supposed it could be possible to ignore God’s gentle prodding and therefore miss out on happiness completely. It was at times like this, when the ice queen memory surfaced, that she began to question herself. Cathy had even teased Jessica about men being afraid of her. That wasn’t what she wanted, either. Cathy, I’m not good with blind dates. I need time to get to know someone first.

What better way to get to know someone than to meet them? Cathy looked at her so pitifully. Just this once. I’ll never ask you again.

Cathy-- Jessica already felt the guilt swelling inside. Cathy’s blue eyes pleaded for help. Jessica began to waver, asking what the worst thing that could happen might be. Then again, what if the knuckle-draggers were right about her and she just wasn’t capable of having a good time.

Please, Jess. Cathy’s eyes were almost moist with tears from her efforts.

How do you do that? Jessica threw out disgustedly.

What? Cathy was the picture of innocence.

Make me feel so guilty.

Cathy smiled. Victory was in her grasp. Come on. Let’s go break a little ice.

Why do I feel it cracking under my feet? Jessica asked sarcastically before Cathy grabbed her arm and swung her about.

I’ll take that as a yes! Cathy was practically wiggling with excitement.

Wait. Wait. I don’t want to go out tonight.

Oh, come on. It will be fun.

No, really. I’m tired. I’m covered in dust from the book shelves. I just want to go home and relax.

Cathy looked disappointed, but nothing could keep her down for long. That’s okay. Just meet him. It’ll be great.

Jessica couldn’t stop the tiny groan from rising from her chest. Cathy practically pulled her along the hallway, chatting excitedly about the latest thing she and Max had been up to.

The pair burst through the double doors at the library’s entrance simultaneously. The cool night air filled Jessica’s lungs as she and Cathy exited the library. It was early June, but the past few nights had remained surprisingly cool. New York always made Jessica long for the milder seasons back home. She shook partly from the cold and partly from nervousness. She kept silently telling herself, Have an open mind; have an open mind; have an open mind.

Ahead, leaning against the railing of the steps were two men. Jessica recognized Max, Cathy’s boyfriend of the past year. The other was a tall, dark-haired man. Black, sweeping brows rose slightly as he directed his gaze toward her. Jessica feigned a look of nonchalance as his dark brown eyes closely watched her approach. Obviously of Italian descent, he had dark eyes to match the hair and a deep tan. It was easy to see why Cathy had been so impressed. His face split in an easy smile, and Jessica felt herself go warm with embarrassment as he stared at her. Jessica wondered if Dominic saw her as the desperate wallflower she felt like at this moment. Instantly suspicious, she also wondered why Dominic would want or need to have someone intervene, setting up a blind date in the first place. He looked like the type that could find someone to tag along with him wherever he went.

Jessica was sure of one thing. Cathy seemed far too satisfied as she introduced Jessica to Dominic Scolari.

Dominic’s hand closed over Jessica’s and she tried to size him up from his lop-sided grin to the way he teased Cathy about her methods. Jessica would have to admit he was handsome, and knew it most likely. But there was something else she couldn’t quite grasp and she had pretty good instincts when it came to people. It probably was the abundance of confidence Dominic showed. This was a man who was used to the ladies’ attention.

Actually, I’ve heard a lot about you, so I couldn’t believe my luck when I found out Cathy was your sister, Dominic said.

Heard about me? Jessica instantly assumed Cathy had been filling in all of the details of her life. She glanced toward her sister, a glint of revenge in her eyes.

Professor Higgins, Dominic offered by way of an explanation. I handed in a paper on a similar subject you had done and he kept me after class for a half hour comparing the two. It was very humbling.

Jessica felt a slow blush warm her cheeks and wasn’t sure if he was being sincere or just laying it on thick to make an impression. Professor Higgins had been a long-time admirer of Jessica’s. She had become a sort of protégé, hanging around his office to discuss new discoveries. Still, it really embarrassed Jessica when he praised her at any time, but to hear of it from another student like this made it worse. It was almost as if she was still in grade school being forced to stand in front of the class while being presented with the monthly high-achiever award. It was enough to make Jessica want to find something to crawl under until the scrutiny was over. She shyly pushed a strand of hair back from her face and thanked him just the same. Are you a history major?

He’s a future famous archeologist, which is one of the reasons I invited the two of you to meet Morgan, Max piped in. Morgan will only be in town for a short time and he’s looking for a new assistant. Max pointed in Dominic’s direction. If Dom can make an impression, he might just be able to work with Morgan. Max was the eternal optimist. Although it was true Jessica didn’t know him well, he always impressed her with his easy-going nature.

He’s more optimistic than I am, Dominic added, confirming Jessica’s own observation. But with you alongside me, it will be easier.

Jessica hesitated. It would be fun to meet Benjamin Morgan. When is the party? Dominic seemed all too sure of himself, making her waver.

This Saturday, Cathy offered.

Day after tomorrow, you mean? This Saturday. Is that what we’re talking about?

Cathy nodded, her eyes pleading.

Jessica hesitated. Something just didn’t feel right. She tried to smile politely. Dominic didn’t appear to be abnormal, but sometimes looks could be deceiving. Still unsure, Jessica hesitantly agreed to go. Triumph shined in Cathy’s eyes.

Great! Max said, hugging Cathy close. Oh, now’s probably as good a time as any to tell you. He exchanged a quick look with Cathy. My family, every once in a while, throws a big dinner party like this, inviting all kinds of boring people mostly. It’s really a good excuse for everyone to dress in clothes they would only wear at a wedding or presidential inauguration, but Mom and Dad think they have to do it a few times a year. Do you mind?

Jessica tried to offer a sincere smile, but was certain it fell short and that realization made her feel guilty and self-conscious. Of course not. I’ll look forward to it.