Chakra of My Discontent (When Sex Isn't the Only Obsession)

By Dan Wentzel

Here is the transcript to Dan Wentzel's one-person show "Chakra of My Discontent" originally performed at Tony Barr's Film Actors Workshop in December 2013.

Dan riffs and rants on living with OCD, dating and sex as a middle aged gay man, and his first ride in AIDS/Life Cycle between San Francisco and Los Angeles. Dan is currently an actor/writer/comedian living in Southern California.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Dan Wentzel
• Release date: Aug 17, 2014
• ISBN: 9781311810083

Dan Wentzel

Dan Wentzel was born in Seattle, Washington on what was probably a raining day on the 26th of October. Yes, he is a Scorpio, with Virgo rising and a Pisces moon. So, yes, he naturally ended up in years of therapy.Dan is an actor/writer/comedian currently living in Southern California. (Yes, he is SAG-AFTRA, and yes he is interested in acting for pay in your film/television/stage/internet project.)Dan is what fundamentalists used to label as a "militant homosexual" which he still wears as a badge of honor. Dan is also a public transit advocate and believes in climate change, as well as the laws of math and science. Dan has been successfully living with OCD for twenty years and had ridden in AIDS/LifeCycle multiple years. As a Religious Science Practitioner, Dan aspires to see the divine in everyone and everything including himself.If you wish to contribute to AIDS/LifeCycle and help sponsor Dan's ride in 2015, you may do so athttp://tofighthiv.org/goto/danwentzel2015.

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CHAKRA

OF MY DISCONTENT

Script of one-person-show by

Dan Wentzel

Originally performed at Tony Barr’s Film Actor’s Workshop on December 14, 2013.

Followed by Dan Wentzel’s Facebook and Twitter Postings from Aids Life Cycle 2013

Copyright 2014 by Dan Wentzel

All Rights Reserved

CHAKRA OF MY DISCONTENT

(When Sex Isn’t the Only Obsession)

Dan Wentzel

Copyright 2014 by Dan Wentzel

Smashwords Edition

CONTENTS

African-American History Month

Disneyland

Bathhouses

Halloween

New York

Weight Loss

Gym

Breaking Up With Food

Dieting Is Worse Than Dating

Bad Breath

London

Grindr

Hanky Code

Old and Lonely

Goody Drawer

Circle of Sex Life

Eighteen

Down Low on the Porch

Go-Go Boys

Middle-Aged Clubbing

Margaret Cho

Tom Cruise

Trickle-Down Economics

What’s Hot Now

Janitor-in-a-Jar

It Gets Better

Stonewall

Palm Springs

AIDS/Life Cycle

SILENCE (Still) = DEATH

APPENDIX

AFRICAN-AMERICAN HISTORY MONTH

Welcome Everyone!

I am so happy to have you here.

We are approaching the holidays. We’ve just had Thanksgiving! Chanukah… Soon it will be Christmas, and then New Year’s Day, also known as National Weight Watcher’s Day. Then comes my Favorite month, February -- African-American History month -- which I like to celebrate by sucking on as much black dick as possible. It is just my way of saying, Thank you, Harriet Tubman, Thank you, for helping to free the slaves. By the way, thank you also for letting us gays piggy back on your civil rights movement. Much appreciated.

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DISNEYLAND

So how was the traffic getting here? I know that on the Westside there is no such thing as a good time for traffic any more. Well, I got here by public transit. In fact, I don’t drive. Not for several years. I used to drive everywhere. In fact, I used to spend several hours a day, every day, in my car, but it was not always by choice.

I remember the first time it happened. I was 21 and working for Disneyland part-time on weekends. Has anybody here been to Disneyland? The Happiest Place on Earth? I hope this doesn’t get me banned for life but I am going to tell you a true story.

I remember one night after work I was fooling around with a coworker in the employee parking lot until 1:00 a.m., and afterward I got lost trying to drive out of the lot. A Disneyland security car started following me, and there I was sitting in the driver’s seat, totally covered in assorted bodily fluids and I thought, Crap, I’m going to be arrested, fired and my name is going to become part of Disneyland lore as the guy who got caught having sex at Disneyland. The security car turned on its flashing lights, and I stopped my car, and I held my breath in fear as the Disneyland security guard came up to me and said, Hey, you seem lost. The exit is that way... By the way, why are you here so late?

"Uh, I was just having a heart to heart conversation with a friend."

"Okay, well, keep it clean. It’s Disneyland".

"Yes, sir."

I went home not sure if he believed me, and for the next several days I showed up to work every day expecting to get fired, because there is not an inch of that theme park that isn’t recorded on security cameras, not an inch. The next time you are in the park and have to go to the bathroom, and are taking a dump in Fronteirland, just wave and say hello to the security dude watching you on camera to make sure you aren't selling drugs or shoplifting.

Well, I didn’t get fired. But I was punished in a way. One day, as I was getting in my car and to leave for work, I remember driving out of my apartment parking lot and going over a bump of some kind. At that moment I wasn’t sure what it was, and I remember thinking. Did I just run over someone? Nah, it must have been a speed bump. But I couldn't get that thought, did I run over someone? out of my head. I spent that whole shift at work worrying if I had actually run over someone and not known it. When I got home I took a close look at my car. There were no bloodstains or ripped clothing or dents. I scoured the speed bumps in the apartment parking lot and there was nothing on the pavement, just the normal speed bumps. So I went to bed.

However, the same thing happened again the next day as I was driving to work, and this time I pulled the car over to stop and check this different mysterious bump to make sure it wasn't a person. Soon, every time I drove over any sort of bump, pothole or my car gears would suddenly shift gears, I would have to turn around and drive back to make sure I hadn’t actually run over a person. However, after I had stopped, turned around and checked I'd think, Maybe I didn’t check enough, so I’d