Ebook315 pages4 hours
A Kettle of Vultures: . . . left beak marks on my forehead
By Sabrina Lamb
Rating: 0 out of 5 stars
()
About this ebook
Written with humorous abandon by popular satirist, former stand-up comic, and media commentator Sabrina Lamb, A Kettle of Vultures is a fictional romp which exposes the acerbic thoughts of image consultant Iris Chapman, her dysfunctional family, socially maladjusted clients, magical friends, and her adventurous journey toward self-acceptance.
Unbeknownst to Iris Chapman, the Atlanta-based image consultant, a kettle of low-flying vultures convenes overhead as she boards the flight home to Opa Locka on the day of her brother’s controversial wedding. Following their customary bear hugs, Iris’ eccentric family launches into the inquisition, the visual and vocal assessment of Iris’ physical appearance.
Iris is already attacked daily by her own inquisition, questioning her very existence. Self-acceptance is a long journey and it’s unclear whether or not she’ll get there as she attempts to seduce an uninterested man, moves cities, loses clients, and meets a man she’s not sure she can trust. Will Iris survive the onslaught by the vulturous characters in her life? Will her octogenarian grandmother, her superstitious mother who denunciates anything nappy, her hermit-like father, and irritating clients, push Iris over the edge of her own sanity? Will she learn to accept herself?
Unbeknownst to Iris Chapman, the Atlanta-based image consultant, a kettle of low-flying vultures convenes overhead as she boards the flight home to Opa Locka on the day of her brother’s controversial wedding. Following their customary bear hugs, Iris’ eccentric family launches into the inquisition, the visual and vocal assessment of Iris’ physical appearance.
Iris is already attacked daily by her own inquisition, questioning her very existence. Self-acceptance is a long journey and it’s unclear whether or not she’ll get there as she attempts to seduce an uninterested man, moves cities, loses clients, and meets a man she’s not sure she can trust. Will Iris survive the onslaught by the vulturous characters in her life? Will her octogenarian grandmother, her superstitious mother who denunciates anything nappy, her hermit-like father, and irritating clients, push Iris over the edge of her own sanity? Will she learn to accept herself?
Author
Sabrina Lamb
Sabrina Lamb is a keynote speaker, media personality, and writer. She is the author of Kettle of Vultures and the parenting guide Do I Look Like an ATM? Her writing has also appeared in Essence, Heart and Soul, and Black Elegance. She has co-hosted and been featured in numerous radio and television shows, such as CNN’s Nancy Grace and BET. Read more on her website SabrinaLamb.com and follow her on twitter @SabrinaLamb.
Related to A Kettle of Vultures
Related ebooks
A Meeting In The Ladies' Room Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Hard Candy The Finale Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsShifting Through Neutral: A Novel Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Taming Lil' Mo (Next Level Publishing Presents) Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsHarlem's Dragon: A Novel Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsThe Life You Choose Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsWritin' Dirty: An Anthology Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsSatan's Sisters: A Novel Work of Fiction Rating: 1 out of 5 stars1/5The Jones Men Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsStrange Fruit: A Novel Rating: 1 out of 5 stars1/5Release Me: My Life, My Words Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsPure Bronx Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsThe Major's Wife Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsConfidential Volume 2: Brown Skin: Confidential, #2 Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5Working Hard For The Money Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsHeaven and Earth Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsOn Baker Street: Growing up in the Projects Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsThe 716: Love & Consequences Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsProject Princess: Project Princess, #2 Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsThe Rat That Got Away: A Bronx Memoir Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsThe Seven Days: A Novel Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsGangsta Lovin': I Fell in love with a Philly Goon Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsThe Trophy Wives: A Novel Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsIf These Walls Could Talk Rating: 3 out of 5 stars3/5Triple Jeopardy: Three Strikes But Not Out Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsWomen: the New Doggs Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsRenegade: Teen Sex Trade Part Two Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsSola Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsWhispers from the Past Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsCome Get Some Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratings
Humor & Satire For You
Love and Other Words Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Anxious People: A Novel Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5The Best F*cking Activity Book Ever: Irreverent (and Slightly Vulgar) Activities for Adults Rating: 2 out of 5 stars2/5I Can't Make This Up: Life Lessons Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Don't Panic: Douglas Adams & The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5I Will Judge You by Your Bookshelf Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5The Screwtape Letters Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5A Man Called Ove: A Novel Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5101 Fun Personality Quizzes: Who Are You . . . Really?! Rating: 3 out of 5 stars3/5Swamp Story: A Novel Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Solutions and Other Problems Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Big Swiss: A Novel Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck: A Counterintuitive Approach to Living a Good Life Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Killing the Guys Who Killed the Guy Who Killed Lincoln: A Nutty Story About Edwin Booth and Boston Corbett Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5Go the F**k to Sleep Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Mindful As F*ck: 100 Simple Exercises to Let That Sh*t Go! Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Plato and a Platypus Walk Into a Bar...: Understanding Philosophy Through Jokes Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Everything Is F*cked: A Book About Hope Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Maybe You Should Talk to Someone: the heartfelt, funny memoir by a New York Times bestselling therapist Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5The Soulmate Equation Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Farrell Covington and the Limits of Style: A Novel Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Tidy the F*ck Up: The American Art of Organizing Your Sh*t Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Everything I Know About Love: A Memoir Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5How to Stay Married: The Most Insane Love Story Ever Told Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5The 2,548 Wittiest Things Anybody Ever Said Rating: 3 out of 5 stars3/5My Favorite Half-Night Stand Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5And Every Morning the Way Home Gets Longer and Longer: A Novella Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5The Radleys: A Novel Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Dating You / Hating You Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5
Reviews for A Kettle of Vultures
Rating: 0 out of 5 stars
0 ratings
0 ratings0 reviews
Book preview
A Kettle of Vultures - Sabrina Lamb
/a book_preview_excerpt.html |ۮƒPa0
2lHE۶$`d+U$fT~GCZ+2YU[Ӑwˊi}Տ^O_?e?|7.?Eӗڇ~_Ns\窛!.?W!Um6'i X/w{`}9QkτTt{U]
_TO;RRP:?vWqI/ty9q.kZUcs\(fѮ˻Alz Z@~m#!>
[y_}_]:l#stk ,x8͵!zLx+V6.U
_t旟cUF.Qk{]kUZl{}aM)xj'nqNP\v?v>`]}zq'܂=jżn%^]t_9W]*.5$?k]C ~`lvM(/9GlWޅjhe
dY73{t}c44
jEW6_\/pkﱽ),7+sZ2t=lKaZ
8xB_G
1%RI] K:`}Ϛz/k/Z=Sqp_5T!YO[v07;TGLTwغPM&,ߨ6 TGSp=1)3t
'+7Gcuͽ`]з[} SxLx損ܛ;ׅy\XpSZǻQ}MV7F:u^Trז_6Э0I%چGjYx6^k=_u%
w
u=oTSw^{Xn(Z雊 HDp'dQzx(kUFQ| E?8;/n"`M`x'
1X`#b]Vo;?98l
Ɨֈ3Յ>¥)%g$@N5ZDpվ'i<&pu
*AAnt2oJٵ!2Z0tp~rSx7a~ nH{A8hZږ(̴
u%D{FR,F
2+چbk!{Ϸ̮Y\d]s#ΜE)
S3JZrCR`$n
8)4W TboW p"兓Z&xz?~O!1t>?\ar9,aZ##\3a߇f곌*jC {kX
~I.DIq<#^ۛz7GhU0!B-\+^jyS:vpѕ±qula` w8a]xyg+ݻjcxqnMJFx'D
i~Dpw'~W<
K,`|_jdrb3@,+8|"GAG!<
SR #4\Z
.~;{ġ36?ЭJJb&X0%px.