Webs of Deceit

By Kate Reid

Kate Reid’s book “Webs of Deceit” will give the reader skills to recognize a deviant’s “game plan” to access a child. It will empower the reader to stop the abuse before it has a chance to start.

A spider has 7 stages of building its web to control and entrap an innocent victim. It is specifically designed to deceive and capture prey. Sexual predators work within a similar framework. Reid shows the seven stages of “grooming” from the moment a sex predator has determined to find a child.

The initial stage of building a web around a child and their family is the most crucial stage and being aware and knowing what to do in that moment will save you and your child years of heartache. “Webs of Deceit” will give you insight into a predator’s ‘modus operandi’ and give you the skills to counteract the initial point of contact.

This is definitely a book most parents will not want to miss out on reading. You will look through new eyes, see obvious signs that you never saw before and give substance to that feeling that something doesn't seem "quite right."

You (the parent/caregiver) are the gatekeeper to your home and family. Instinct is not enough to stop these people who are socially skilled and have position, power and resources to enter into our lives on a daily basis. We meet them in our homes, social activities, schools, churches and sports. Wherever there are children, a sexual deviant is not far from them because they position themselves in places to gain access to children. “

"Webs of Deceit” exposes the “game plan” of sexual predators, (including child sex traffickers and pimps) who "groom" our children under our nose.
Where there are children, there are predators close by, and you will be enlightened, empowered and skilled to protect your child from the “grooming” and entrapment of sexual predators as we go inside their minds and show you how easily they deceive us.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Kate Reid
• Release date: Mar 8, 2011
• ISBN: 9780646538358

Kate Reid

Kate is an Australian author, speaker, founding director of Breakthrough Options and an advocate for protecting childrenKate as a SpeakerKate has spoken to many groups and organisations, with notable members of the community in Canberra, Sydney, Cedar Rapids, Iowa and Minnesota USA. She also develops and speaks at her own workshops and seminars.Kate as an AdvocateKate’s advocacy for protecting children includes helping to establish CRTEC (Centre to Restore Trafficked and Exploited Children) in Iowa, USA as Executive Director, developing the CERRP, designing the home to receive trafficked children, training volunteers, public speaking, designing the literature and advertisements, developing and creating the certificate training manual Identification of Trafficked Children (within U.S. Borders) aka the nationwide “TIP-ID Program.”Kate as a Founding DirectorKate is the founder of Breakthrough Options and has developed training workshops to help families, groups, organisations and churches to recognise predatory behaviours in those we trust with our children, how best to protect our child/ren from “grooming” of sex predators and understanding human trafficking of children for the sex industry.She developed Breakthrough Options from the ground up and is now experiencing a measure of success for the seeds sown. And at the end of the day she likes to sit behind her drum kit and beat out thunderous sounds with precision and passion.Kate is a Mum of four boys, Mum-in-law to two amazing girls and grandma of two wonderful girls.

Book preview

Protecting Children from Sexual Predators

Copyright 2010 by Kate Reid

ISBN: 978-0-646-53835-8

www.breakthroughoptions.org

Cover Illustration and book graphics Copyright © 2010 by Josue Castro

Smashwords Edition

All that is necessary for the forces of evil to win in this world is for enough good people to do nothing.

Sir Edmund Burke

This ebook is licensed for your personal enjoyment only. This ebook may not be re-sold or given away to other people. If you would like to share this book with another person, please purchase an additional copy for each recipient. If you’re reading this book and did not purchase it, or it was not purchased for your use only, then please return to Smashwords.com and purchase your own copy. Thank you for respecting the hard work of this author.

Disclaimer

The information contained in Webs of Deceit is meant to serve as a guide to protect children from the grooming of sexual predators. The author of Webs of Deceit has made all reasonable effort to provide current and accurate information for the readers of this book. The author will not be held liable for any unintentional errors or omissions that may be found.

The material in Webs of Deceit may include information, products, or services by third parties. Third Party information comprises the information and opinions expressed by their owners. As such, the author of this book does not assume responsibility or liability for any Third Party information or opinions.

The publication of such Third Party information does not constitute the author’s guarantee of any information, instruction, opinion, products or service contained within the Third Party Material. Use of recommended Third Party information does not guarantee that your results, will mirror our own. Publication of such Third Party information is simply a recommendation and expression of the author’s own opinion of that material.

Whether because of the general evolution of sex trafficking and pornography, or the unforeseen changes in policies and guidelines, or in the rescuing of those trapped in the sex industry, what is stated as fact at the time of this writing, may become outdated or simply inapplicable at a later date. This may apply to current information, as well as, information or organisations that are referenced in this book. Great effort has been exerted to safeguard the accuracy of this writing. Opinions regarding similar abuse platforms have been formulated as a result of both personal experience, as well as the well documented experiences of others.

No part of this publication shall be reproduced, transmitted or resold in whole or in part in any form, without the prior written consent of the author. All information and stories appearing in Webs of Deceit are the property of their respective owners.

List of Contents

Introduction

Chapter 1 - Sexual Predators

Chapter 2 - Familial Predators

Chapter 3 - Online Predators

Chapter 4 - Paedophiles

Chapter 5 - Child Sex Trafficking

Chapter 6 - Pornography

Chapter 7 - Johns (Demand)

Chapter 8 - Demand and Supply

Chapter 9 - Pimps

Chapter 10 - Child (supply)

Chapter 11 - Rescue and Restoration

Chapter 12 - Trail of Money

Chapter 13 - Solution

What Others Say:

"Kate is a true leader, rather than a follower, in her field of child protection and through her business Breakthrough Options. She has demonstrated a depth of knowledge on panels with notable members of the community, as well as her own seminars and workshops. She has always displayed a high degree of integrity, responsibility, dedication and ambition. Her good judgement and mature outlook ensure a logical and practical approach to her endeavours" ~ Jacqui Burke, Member for Molonglo Nov. 2007

"As a result of her work, she has been involved with me in a number of presentations and displays exploring and teaching about child abuse and protecting children" ~ Dr Sue Packer AM FRACP, Community Paediatrician and President of NAPCAN

"Kate is not afraid to break new ground" ~ Pastor Jennifer Brown, Lakeview Open Bible Church, Iowa

"Kate is a passionate and informed campaigner in the child protection field" ~ ASCA (Advocates for Survivors of Child Abuse)

"Kate Reid is a powerful and emotive communicator and because of her own experience as a child, she is well able to bring the case for healing and positive change" ~ Fatherhood Foundation

"Kate is a very gifted communicator, with an ability to reach the hearts of people regardless of their age or status in life" Pastor Gloria Neale, National Capital Church

"Ms.Reid delivers a passionate, well educated message of hope for the forgotten and exploited. Her history and understanding of human trafficking issues, both local and abroad, serve to raise awareness and action" Ric Lumbard - CEO , Center to Restore Trafficked and Exploited Children.

Introduction

Knowledge is Power. Sir Francis Bacon

Thousands of sexual predators live in our communities undetected, they weave in, out and around our lives. They may be inside or outside our homes; it is a given that where children are, sexual predators will be close by.

How do we protect our child without making them afraid?

How do we know if someone is safe, or not, to be around our child?

I wrote this book to help you become aware of the subtle distinctions between a genuine person and a nice person who is a groomer.

To groom means: to prepare for a specific purpose, in this case, for sexual gratification. This awareness will give you skills to pick a sexual predator in the moment you need it. Webs of Deceit will also give you skills to teach your child how to protect themselves from the predator.

Sexual predators and traffickers are growing in numbers at an alarming rate, and our children are also going missing at an alarming rate. 20,000 Australian children are reported missing every year (AFP) and 1.2 million children are trafficked every year (UNICEF).

As a parent or caregiver, this book is a must to help protect children. I only wish a book like this was around when I was struggling to bring up four boys alone. I learned by trusting my instinct to protect my children but I had no skills to recognise the predators who came in the back door (through my needs) to access my children.

Webs of Deceit will give you tools to recognise and to disarm any grooming behaviours of those nice people we let into our homes and into relationship with our children. I write through my own experiences as well as other’s stories of being trafficked and deceived, while peppering it with other documented information and up to date newspaper articles.

Carefully and skilfully a sexual predator builds webs around you and your child as you unknowingly engage with them to become actively involved in the process of entrapping your child. Each chapter weaves into a creative comparison  of a spider building his web with such skill and planning, using different threads of silk for different purposes. You will remember the analogies as they give you something concrete to relate to should you come across deviant behaviours in someone you trust.

Each spidery thread is related to a certain behaviour of a sexual predator and how he goes about entrapping our child, virtually unrecognised to the unskilled eye. A spider builds its web as the sun goes down and as a general rule, none of us have time to sit and watch the spider intricately build his magnificent piece of architecture. We are usually preoccupied with other things while he is building his gruesome trap to capture an unsuspecting victim. We see evidence of the web only after the spider has left.

Webs of Deceit will give you insight and skills to stop the sexual predator from attaching to your loved ones from the moment they throw out their first thread.

There are many wonderful organisations who rescue and restore trafficked children. There are many organisations and psychologists and counselling, churches etc. who are there to catch the victim after they have been rescued. I believe that we need to go back to START and give the power back to the parents.

Parents are the ones that should be teaching their own children. Who teaches them about being safe around electricity, around beaches and crossing roads? Who teaches them how to be safe in the home and outside the home? We teach them the dangers and how to stay safe within those environments; it’s as natural as breathing, to teach them how to stay safe, yet we fail to teach them how to stay safe around people.

Does teaching our children safety within their environment scare them from ever crossing a road, or swimming, or using electrical equipment? No! We teach them that potentially these things have the power to harm us, so we need to be careful.  Does it mean that no child will ever get hurt or killed from these things? No! What it means is you are giving them the best information to protect themselves whilst enjoying freedom.

Benjamin Disraeli once said, As a general rule, the most successful man in life is the man who has the best information.

Let’s give our children the best information possible to help keep them safe, while at the same time, give them skills to empower them to recognise and resist the coercion of sexual predators and traffickers. It doesn’t need to happen to your child and it doesn’t need to happen to you.

The answer is simple; you just need to know how, as we all do. Webs of Deceit has solid information and practical tools to offer you, to protect your child.

You did not choose this book by chance. You had a reason and I trust that you will now get the answers you clearly are clearly searching for.

Now come journey with me, through the pages of this book and walk in the footsteps of others.

******

Chapter 1

Sexual Predators

Catapulted out of a deep sleep by the blood curdling screams exploding from my six year old’s bedroom. Running to him without my feet touching the floor, my heart pounding like it was about to leap out of my chest.

I turned on the light, saw him curled up under the sheets, shaking in sheer terror, and screaming out that the Boogieman was hiding in the room.

The noise woke the other boys up and they sleepily helped me search under the bed, in the wardrobe, behind the curtains, and in the toy box. After convincing him that there was no such thing as a Boogieman and reassuring him that the predator was not hiding somewhere in the room, he settled and hesitantly drifted off to sleep.

As I sat there with him, I remembered in that moment, the crippling fear I had of the Boogieman when I was a child and the many times I slept under my bed, just in case he came for me. And he did come!

The Boogieman does exist and our children have a right to be concerned, to know the truth, and be given tools to know what to do should he enter their lives.

The Boogieman is alive and well in 2010 and is stealing our children right under our parental noses, and we do nothing, because we don’t know what to do, until it is too late; wishing later that we had done something to warn them.

There is so much ambiguity surrounding child sexual abuse, and because of the confusion and silence surrounding it, we close our eyes and cross our fingers hoping it doesn’t happen to our child. We want our children to grow up in a secure environment, and yet, we don’t tell them what dangers they may encounter. We don’t hear them when they are trying to tell us what they are afraid of, instead, we reassure them that everything is okay and we tell them we won't let anyone harm them. We don’t tell them about child predators because we don’t want to scare them by telling them about things that may never happen to them. So we do nothing.

That is until they are visited by a predator, or they go missing, or they get abused by someone we love and trust, then we wished we had told them. Without information, they have no framework to make sense of what is happening to them, once they are targeted.

Sexual predators are everywhere, can be anyone, can strike anytime and turn up anywhere.

They are hidden within our homes and within our communities, which makes the elusive Boogiemen that our children fear, very real.

Predators (animals that naturally prey on others) are on the lookout constantly for prey, and, by instinct, know the weakest and most vulnerable to target. They know where their prey are likely to be and know that eventually they will succeed in their goals; all they need is skill, time and patience.

Sexual Predators are clever in the artistry of deception and unless you know what you are looking for, you won’t see it. They are almost invisible to the ordinary man and woman living out their daily lives, that is, until they touch your family; then, all the niggling doubts you once had, will become obvious signs that needed to have been checked and given attention at the time. Hindsight is too late!

Webs of Deceit is written to expose the way sexual predators prey on your children in secret, while at the same time groom you (the adult) to get access to your children.

Once they have set their desire on your child, it is already too late because they stop at nothing to get to them. There is no time limit; it may take weeks, months, or even years until they have the child they had chosen.

Sexual Predators are like any other predatory creatures that are focused entirely on their prey, as they plan and prepare traps to ensnare them. The most frustrating and soul destroying part of this process is that we (the parent) unknowingly, and silently, give the predators permission to access our kids.

Our image of a sexual predator is the dirty old man sitting on the park bench, waiting to pounce on your child, or the creepy guy in the white van who stops and offers them a special treat or offer them the chance to pat his puppy.

It is easy to teach our children to stay away from these types of predators, because we don’t have relationship with them. We teach our children to stay away from strangers, feeling that we have done our part to keep them safe.

In 1990, we discovered that after more than 70 years of being told not to speak to strangers, children under the age of 8 — and some now say 10 — don’t know what a stranger is. The concept is too complex and teaching them to fear strangers is not only a waste of time, but dangerous. We found that children’s perception of a stranger is a male who wears a black balaclava, leers and has evil eyes. He steals children from their beds and murders them. Whole classes told me they had never seen a stranger in their lives (except on TV) but would know one instantly if they saw one. Six year olds said they have nightmares about half human half monster stranger creatures. The consequence is that children trust anyone who doesn’t look like the mythical stranger. (A keynote speech delivered by Professor Freda Briggs at Family Planning Queensland’s occasional Wendy Darvill forum: ‘Ignorance is not innocence: why talk about sexuality and prevention of sexual assault in the early years’ at the Bardon Centre, Brisbane, Queensland on Tuesday 8 November 2005).

We teach them about something that doesn’t exist in their minds (in the real world) and we fail to teach them about the very real danger of the ones they love and trust that hurt them secretly within the boundaries of their own environments. There is a dark shadow over our children, and we must tell them about the dangers that lurk inside and outside our homes, and give them skills to recognise grooming from people they know, and teach them skills to self-protect.

Sexual predators have familiar faces, names, and positions of trust. They can be uncles, fathers, mothers, aunties, grandparents, church leaders, neighbours, babysitters, or sport coaches. My goal is to show you through stories how to look beyond what appears normal and see what else may be going on just below the surface. All the predator needs is to get the child to go with them willingly and within minutes the child is entrapped and controlled by strangers.

It is time for us to take our heads out of the sand, and take our children’s safety to another level, because child sex exploitation and slavery is on the increase. We need to teach them how easy it is to become entrapped through something as simple as trusting the wrong person.

We also need to teach them what to do should they get caught because the psychological control the predator has on them is too powerful for them to pull free from on their own and we need to educate them to recognise the grooming of predators so they will have the power to walk away, or tell someone who will believe them, while it is safe for them to do so.

The intensity of the predatory relationship is powerful and is similar to falling in love, and child predators are skilled at drawing out trust and emotions from kids.

While they present themselves to us as caring and wonderful people, they have the ability to be extremely dangerous people who will harm your child in unimaginable ways.

No one cares for your child like you do, no one will protect your child like you can, and no one else can teach them self-protection, like you will.

Child sexual abuse and exploitation of children is growing as more people are becoming addicted to pornography and fantasy sex with children. The demand for more pornography and child sex partners has increased at alarming rates that we need to