Sissy the Vampire Hummingbird Slayer
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Hummingbirds. You know what they are. Tiny emerald speed demons. People used to hang out jars of red sugar-water for them... until environmental disasters rewired their tiny brains and aggressive appetites to prefer the taste of human blood. But they’d better watch out who they mess with, because Sissy has an aerosol can, and she knows how to turn it into a flamethrower!
Helen Montgomery
Helen Lloyd Montgomery has been a writer since the third grade when she successfully negotiated a deal with her teacher to write stories using her weekly spelling words rather than write them out ten times each. She and her cat Turbo Tasha currently reside in Minnesota, where Helen is driven by the bitter winter weather to keep warm by exercising her fingers over a hot keyboard. She invites you to visit her website at http://www.hlmontgomery.com where you can find discount coupons for Skinwalker Moon, as well as a recipe for delightful little cookies you'll want to keep all for yourself.
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Sissy the Vampire Hummingbird Slayer - Helen Montgomery
Sissy the Vampire Hummingbird Slayer
by
HL Montgomery
Smashwords Edition, License Notes
Copyright © 2009, Helen L. Montgomery
This book is offered for free and as such, may be shared freely as long as writing credit and contact information are left intact. This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places and incidences are either a product of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously. Any resemblance to persons living or dead or existing in some weird half-life is entirely coincidental.
a world with tiny emerald speed demons
I was attacked by hummingbirds on my way home from work today. You know what they are. Tiny emerald speed demons. People used to hang out jars of red sugar water for them. They don’t any more. They’ve learned better.
A lot of things have changed over the years but not the aggressive nature of hummingbirds. I’d just come out of the office when they swarmed over the top of the building and were all over me like stupid on a chicken. Tiny wings blurred and neck feathers flared bright as the thumb sized creatures buzzed me. A needle-like pain in my thigh was the first clue that I’d been struck. The second clue was the iridescent bastard I saw hanging there with his beak buried in my flesh to feed.
Oh, did I forget to mention? Hummers don’t go for nectar these days. They’ve learned to prefer the taste of blood.
With an angry shriek, I swung my purse at it. It darted away before I could connect but I took