Betrayal

By Thais Russomano

Dora seemingly has the perfect life. Married to much respected and successful lawyer Bernardo Lemos, she has a husband who adores her every breath, maids at her beck and call, and three beautiful children who fill the grand family home with laughter and happiness. Theirs is a love destined to last an eternity – but will eternity prove to be too short, for Dora has a secret that will shatter the tranquillity of the Lemos home and scandalise a small town.

A lifetime later, at the funeral of the now Judge Bernardo Lemos, the mourners are confused by the actions of his widow when she removes from the coffin a simple wooden rosary clasped in the dead man’s hands and replaces it with a sealed letter, just as the coffin lid is closed forever. What secret does the rosary hold and what motivated this kind hearted old lady to commit this strange act of desecration?

Betrayal is the central theme of this tale of intrigue and passion set over a lifetime in southern Brazil. All the main characters commit an act of deceit in one way or another – but which Betrayal do you think hurts most?

Betrayal is based on true events from a family history and enriched with a liberal dose of creative imagination. All names have been changed to protect the identities of those involved.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Thais Russomano
• Release date: Mar 20, 2013
• ISBN: 9781301712762

Thais Russomano

Prof. Thais Russomano graduated in medicine from the Federal University of Pelotas, Brazil (1985) and specialised in internal and emergency medicine. She has a Master’s Degree in Aerospace Medicine - Wright State University, USA (1991), and PhD in Space Physiology - King's College London (1998). She worked for 3 years as a Space Scientist at the Institute of Aerospace Medicine, German Aerospace Centre (DLR) in Cologne, Germany, before founding the Microgravity Centre, PUCRS, a unique international reference centre in the study of human space physiology and space biomedical engineering, which she coordinated for 18 years. Thais has been linked to King's College London in different academic positions since her PhD in 1994, having acted at CHAPS, Faculty of Life Sciences and Medicine, King’s College London, as the Deputy Course Director/ Senior Lecturer of the Space Physiology & Health MSc degree course (2009-2020). In addition, she is a visiting professor at Aalto University, Finland, in Space & Design, and Deggendorf Institute of Technology, European Campus, Germany, contributing to the MSc in Medical Informatics, UFCSPA in Porto Alegre, Brazil, in the areas of Human Physiology in Extreme Environments & Digital Health, and the Faculty of Medicine at the University of Lisbon in Space Physiology & Aviation Medicine (CEMA). Thais is also a Director of two space-related private companies, InnovaSpace Ltd (UK) and the International Space Medicine Consortium Inc. (USA).She has more than 30 years of experience teaching and researching in the fields of Aerospace Medicine, Space Physiology, Aerospace Biomedicine, Aerospace Biomedical Engineering and TeleHealth, including participation in 200+ scientific events with 300+ scientific papers presented. She has also authored books, book chapters and numerous papers in her areas of expertise.Thais is an Elected Academician of the International Academy of Aviation and Space Medicine (IAASM), and the International Academy of Astronautics (IAA), for which she serves on the Board of Trustees. She is also a member of international associations and societies in space, aviation and telehealth (ISfTeH), a Board Member of companies, and further holds patents related to Space Life Sciences and Aerospace Biomedical Engineering. Thais is currently acting as a voluntary Mentor for Space4Women, an initiative of the United Nations Office for Outer Space Affairs (UNOOSA).

Book preview

CHAPTER 1

The Beginning

(in fact - the beginning of the beginning)

When Josué entered the study that day, he saw Inah sitting motionless in the chair that had been Bernardo's favourite, without expression on a face aged by the years. She barely noticed nor acknowledged his presence.

Come on, I came to get you, were the few words uttered by the man with black hair and thick moustache. A good family friend for decades, he had over time become the right-hand man in the work of renowned Judge Bernardo Lemos.

Inah looked up and stared at him, with both exchanging a look that contained a thousand mixed and confused feelings. Josué contracted slightly as if hit by a sharp blow. Inah remained impassive and silent. She rose with difficulty from the chair, sighed deeply, and headed for the door, with Josué following close behind her. They left together for the funeral and an uneasy silence hung over the journey to the cemetery, where relatives and friends of the great judge were already taking part in the customary ritual of watching over his body.

As Josué drove the car, he was lost in deep thought and feeling strangely and uncomfortably tense. That look from Inah, her apathy and complete silence troubled him. It felt as if a cloak of strangeness had somehow fallen between them for some inexplicable reason.

It must be because of her husband's death, he thought to himself time and again trying to justify the behaviour of the old lady, a woman he had come to admire and love greatly over the many years they had now known each other.

Josué had been orphaned at a young age and had consequently grown up in a children's home, a large rambling house with numerous youngsters of differing ages and backgrounds. He had spent his childhood with few financial resources but had always carried within him the resolve that one day he would be somebody of importance. His intelligence and determination had soon been noticed at the school he attended and when he had expressed a desire to pursue a career in Law in his final year there, his teacher had set about finding him a sponsor, someone willing to help. The Lemos family had been approached and upon hearing the plight of the young student, Bernardo and Inah Lemos had decided without hesitation to do what they could to support him. From that day forward they had funded his studies at the Faculty of Law, a place where Bernardo had held the position of Director for many years.

It had not taken much time for Bernardo and Josué to become firm friends. It had, therefore, seemed only natural that Josué be invited by the prestigious Judge Lemos to assist in his law practice, upon the young man completing his studies. Thus over the course of years, Josué had become integrated into both the world of work of Bernardo Lemos and into the life of his family too. The young man devoted himself body and soul to the daily tasks assigned to him and soon forged an accomplished career. In time he had married and produced children of his own, and came to look upon Bernardo and his wife Inah as the father and mother that life had not given him the opportunity to know. Indeed, so much so, that when Josué and his young wife brought their first son into the world, he was named and baptised Bernardo, as an obvious tribute to the man who had given shape to their existence and an honour about which the proud judge often boasted. He could frequently be heard commenting to friends and colleagues that the young Bernardo even shared his mannerisms, clearly influenced in part by the name they had in common and in part by spending so much time together.

Consequently, the death of Judge Bernardo Lemos was a tragic event in the life of Josué. After nearly thirty years of working together and sharing a daily life, the pain of his loss seemed unbearable, completely insurmountable.

Inah was the second wife of Bernardo. They met when she was little more than 30 years old and already a widow but with no children, whereas he had three from his first marriage to Dora, a complex woman too advanced for her time. All who knew her wished she could be forgotten and erased from existence in their lives - an impossible task however.

Dora was born with a gift to captivate and seduce. She could manipulate everything and everyone around her, which she did with pleasure. Beautiful, elegant and graceful, she enjoyed fashion, good food and all the perks a comfortable upper-class life could offer in a small town.

The premature death of her mother when Dora was just five years old brought overwhelming consequences for the little girl and her brothers. These same consequences in fact would ultimately be shared by her cousins, among them Bernardo, upon the equally untimely death of their father, brother to Dora's PaPa. A common bond of grief threw the two families together and with the passing of time they united under one roof, brought together by a new marriage as Dora's father and Bernardo's mother joined in matrimony before the eyes of God and by the Laws of Man.

It was thus with the daily coexistence between childhood games and fairy tales that Bernardo had first fallen in love with his cousin, the beautiful, seductive and intelligent Dora. When playing together, he would be prince to her princess. Exhaustively, Bernardo would meet up with Dora to rescue her from invisible giants, wicked witches and terrifying monsters - and he liked it.

Ah, how he liked it.

Bernardo felt heroic and invincible, determined, proud and capable of unimaginable feats of bravery to save his princess from the towers of her imaginary castles. But he was not the only potential saviour around and on occasion, his role as unbeatable hero and prince would be stolen from him by one of his brothers. At such times, when the task of keeping safe his dream princess from a world of danger was taken from him, yes at such times he felt as though struck by a thunderbolt of lightning, leaving his soul crushed and cut in two. He tried not to mind. He tried so really hard not to mind, and he learned to pretend not to care, but the anger and jealousy he felt were so difficult to hide when he saw his beloved awoken from her magic sleep by the kiss of lips from another prince. At these moments he felt his anger rage, burning inside him, racing and smashing through his young body. But his outward expression would remain unchanged as if that kiss was nothing, as if it meant nothing, and his face revealed absolutely nothing of the pain inside.

For many years life continued like that, as Bernardo learned to live with his passion in secret, skilfully mastering the art of concealment. He disguised his attraction to his cousin and step-sister with unrivalled proficiency, with not even Dora realising the depth of his love for her

Being five years older than Dora, Bernardo still saw her as a mischievous young girl, full of life, still pure and free from malice. Just as he himself was reaching puberty, she remained very much naive and childish, free from the hormonal changes that were affecting Bernardo's thoughts and moods. While Dora continued to take care of her dolls, her cousin took his first steps in a whole new world of the pleasures of the flesh.

It all happened on a hot summer's Sunday.

The children were all having fun running in the courtyard of the large residence that was home to Mr. and Mrs. Lemos, their sons and daughters, servants, two dogs and a cat. The heat was oppressive and overwhelming. Temperatures had soared and a complete lack of breeze made it feel significantly hotter than the 32 degrees that had plagued the small town in the past few days, and Bernardo was sweating profusely. One of the family maids, a young girl in her twenties, took a water hose in hand and began playing the game wet-wet with the children. It was a popular game with simple rules. The children ran excitedly from one side of the courtyard to the other while the maid chased them with the hose, spraying all who did not run quick enough with an 'unwanted' cold shower.

Shrieks of laughter echoed around within the walls of the courtyard and on impulse, Bernardo grabbed the hose himself to join in the fun. Without consciously realizing what he was doing, he turned the water on the young maid soaking her completely. The white fabric of her thin cotton dress was soon sticking to her body, hugging her curves and clinging to her breasts. Nipples, stiffened by the shock of cold water, protruded and she appeared near naked to the eyes of the young Bernardo, who was seized by an almost uncontrollable desire to touch her. He stopped spraying her abruptly, unsure what to do next and rooted to the floor as if his feet had been welded in place, and a strange sensation enveloped his body. He suddenly became very conscious of a flush of heat surging through his veins and a tingling in his crotch that threatened to burst out from his trousers. Momentarily motionless, he felt unable to tear his eyes from the young maid's wet hardened nipples.

Dragged back to reality by the shouting of his brothers and sisters, Bernardo recovered from his state of shock, feeling hugely self conscious and embarrassed, and yet excited and bewildered all at once. He felt stung by an intense impression that everyone was looking and laughing at him and he could feel his erection growing in his trousers, pulsing with desire for those wet breasts. Not knowing quite what to do, Bernardo let the hosepipe drop from his hand and ran off, escaping quickly to the safety and solitude of the bathroom. Once there, locked away and isolated from the world outside, panting, trembling and confused, he dropped his trousers to his knees and for the first time in his life he gripped his penis with new meaning. The movement of his hand increased steadily, rhythmically, constantly growing, driven on by a desire that could no longer be denied. Breathing quickened, face contorted, heart pounded, until moments later the compulsion that had dominated him transformed into a groan of pleasure exhaled through clenched teeth, and a hot stickiness ran down his hand, legs weakened underneath him and his penis shrank and was flaccid once more.

Bernardo dropped down to the floor of the bathroom, wrapped in a blanket of pleasure, the greatest most complete sensation he had experienced till that day. In the distance he could hear the laughter and voices of his brothers and sisters who continued to run and play in the courtyard of the great house. The laughter and the voice of Dora mingled with that of the young maid, as if for a moment they were fused together, as one person, girl and woman merging. Still sat on the bathroom floor, Bernardo felt himself happy as never before, fully realizing that he was now a man, a real man.

No one appeared to have noticed what happened to him that day, although on occasion he had an uneasy feeling that the young maid looked at him in a different way. He avoided being alone with her. He avoided even to look at her. But if needs must and it had to be done, he determinedly never lowered his eyes from hers, never lowered his gaze to the breasts that had turned a new page in the story of his life. The pleasures of the flesh, however, are often more powerful than the censorship of the soul and the image of the young lady's erect nipples often accompanied him to his bedroom. Night after night, cosseted by darkness, he imagined how one day his beloved Dora would have a warm and sensual chest like hers. He dreamed of being able to touch them, caress and kiss them, and with his body tense with pleasure and head buried in his pillow, he would rub his groin against the warm sheets of his bed, he would pretend that Dora were there lying underneath him, nipples stiff and calling to him.

Bernardo's secret passion had suddenly gained new strength. A new desire was now placed firmly at the top of his wish list, much higher than childish fantasies of princes and princesses, or of slaying fierce monsters and bad witches. These were now surpassed by his awakening to the pleasures of the flesh and his desire for sex, but above all else, he desired to one day have Dora as his own.

It became more difficult to keep this love hidden and silent, and Bernardo knew that, in time, everything would have to come out into the open. However, he would require a great deal of patience before he could act. He would have to wait for the right moment before opening up his heart to the young woman he loved. He needed everything to be perfect so he could marry her with respect, and with the blessing of both God and their family. It had to be flawless, and of course, above all, it had to be eternal. Bernardo liked this idea very much indeed, he and Dora, together forever. Lying there in his bed at night and immersed in his passion, often even eternity itself seemed too short when compared to all the time he wanted to spend alongside Dora.

Bernardo realised there was a long path ahead of him before this perfect marriage and eternity could begin. He was a few years older than Dora and knew that first he must study and establish himself with a good career and income, for only then could he turn his dream princess into his wife. All this would take time. Bernardo knew that if he wanted to study Law as had always been his dream, he would need to leave his home and this small town. He would need to travel to the big city, one of the greatest cultural centres of the country, and it would mean a long time away from his love. Just thinking about it filled him with panic but he tried to reassure himself:

After all, these years away will be but a short moment in time when compared to the eternity we will have one day.

But what of Dora?

The thought of leaving his princess in a household of so many other potential princes concerned Bernardo deeply. But worse still, he would be leaving her in the midst of a whole town full of possible suitors; some already known to him and some who could well emerge in his absence.

For many months Bernardo struggled with these thoughts. Once again it was a hidden and solitary battle and he spent night after sleepless night trying to imagine every day, of every month, of every year that he would need to spend away from Dora.

"How many times will I be able to return home to visit her?

Two times?

Maybe three?

Perhaps even none!"

The distance between the small town and the big city was great, and his money restricted. His studies would be intense and the work could potentially consume every minute of his existence.

A trap, a trap........a real life trap, he would reflect, not knowing what to conclude.

Without university he would have no career. Without going away he would have no good job to return to, and thus would not be able to marry Dora. Nonetheless, the idea of leaving her behind cut deeply into his soul, leaving him anxious and fearful, overflowing with confused thoughts reverberating in his head and feelings that paralysed - passion, love, jealousy and fear, but mostly he felt panic - a blinding overwhelming sense of panic.

With time passing by all too quickly, one quiet day Bernardo took courage and resolved to tell Dora of his plans to go away and study. He felt torn as he spoke to her, split in two. One part of him kept the speech going, phrases and expressions that he had planned and thought through countless times over many hours, night after endless night. The other part of Bernardo seemed almost detached, as if like an outside observer looking in at each movement of his beloved, no matter how small. While one part of Bernardo continued his speech, the other tried desperately to interpret her facial expressions and reactions.

Dora listened attentively till the end. She showed no great reaction, but simply leaned forward and gave Bernardo a kiss on his cheek, making him blush. She stood up giggling, made a clumsy pirouette in the air, and began to walk away. Pausing for a moment, she turned her head slightly and looking at him from the corner of her eye, she said something before running off, giggling once more.

Go and return soon. How can I live without my prince?

Bernardo was stunned, yet ecstatic.

That's it then. She can't live without me, he thought.

She can't live without me!

For a moment, he contemplated running after Dora to make sure he had heard her correctly, but there was no need, he knew what he had heard.

How can I live without my prince she had said.

She can't live without me.

Without doubt and without hesitation, she had said how much she needed him. Bernardo's heart leapt and felt ready to explode in his chest. His eyes shone with happiness and in that moment, he was sure he was making the right decision. It only remained now to tell the rest of the family and then he could begin his studies in the New Year and would return home once graduated, ready to marry Dora. This latter detail, however, Bernardo decided to keep silent about for now, deciding that perhaps it was still a little premature to share his secret passion with everyone. He had become accustomed to his clandestine love and was not yet ready to open it up to the scrutiny of others.

His mother and step-father were thrilled with Bernardo's decision and determination. He was already old enough to take care of himself, to fight for his dreams and to face life alone, thus they were happy to make arrangements for his future years of study in the capital city of the State. Bernardo would enrol in one of the best Law schools in the country, a place renowned for producing great lawyers, and he would have somewhere to live and money for his daily expenses.

On the day of his departure Bernardo woke up agitated after a restless night. He was tired and tense and a powerful feeling of longing and desolation came over him.

"How can I be away from Dora for so long?

And what if she forgets me?"

Distressing and pessimistic thoughts invaded his mind and he began to question his decision. Months had passed by since the day he told Dora and his family of his desire to become a lawyer and the preparations had taken time to finalise. The thought that he would be leaving Dora behind had been firmly stashed away in the back of his mind but now the reality was all flooding back to him.

Although Dora was still only a young girl, she was already beginning to show signs of the woman who would emerge from her child's body, and Bernardo feared this moment intensely. He knew only too well how much the desires of the flesh could take hold of his beloved, and he knew he would be far away.

"And what will she do then?

What will she be thinking and who will she be dreaming of on the sleepless nights when body and soul merge in the pursuit of pleasure?"

These uncertainties and fears seemed insurmountable and intolerable to Bernardo. By the time he had finished packing his bag he felt not at all well, consumed by doubts and regrets, hot and bothered with his mind filled with a never ending circle of unanswered questions. He sat on his bed contemplating never to leave his room, but he knew he could no longer retreat. His destiny was set and like it or not, he would have to follow it. To turn back now would be a sign of weakness and cowardice, something unthinkable for the Lemos family. They would despise him, Dora would despise him, and most of all, he would despise himself. Instead, he picked up his bag, took a deep breath, and focused on the words that Dora had said.

Go and return soon.

Go and return soon.

Bernardo repeated the words again and again like a mantra before opening his bedroom door and going downstairs, as if the words could provide him with extra power, energy, and above all, certainty.

The entire Lemos family were waiting to say their goodbyes to Bernardo and to wish him well. It was a happy farewell with good natured teasing from his siblings and a tender kiss from his mother, but it was not this that stood out in Bernardo's memory of that day. Something else insidiously clung in there, something that would torment him many times in the years that lay ahead. His most haunting memory of that day was his last sight of Dora as he walked away and towards his future.

Everyone was gathered together outside the front door of the family home, waving to Bernardo as he slowly drew further away, suitcase in hand, smile on face and heart breaking. From the end of the road he briefly looked back for one last wave, and the scene in the distance seemed to slow down in time. It was exactly then that Bernardo realized Dora was the only one not waving and that she was looking to one side, in the opposite direction to him. From the corner of his eye Bernardo thought he caught sight of the silhouette of a youth, a young man perhaps slightly older than himself, who gently lifted the brim of his hat in what seemed to be a veiled greeting. For a moment he felt sure Dora had returned the compliment with a quick, sly smile, and in that instant and for the first time, Bernardo understood that Dora was no longer a naive and helpless young girl.

CHAPTER 2

The funeral

(and Bernardo's last wishes)

The room at the cemetery for the overnight vigil was crowded. The family were joined by friends, former students, and work colleagues of Bernardo, as well as representatives from the local town hall and federal government, all paying their last respects to the prominent judge. Some wept, some prayed, while others remained silent with a look of disbelief. It had often seemed that the great Bernardo Lemos would live forever and therefore his death had come as a shock to many.

When Inah arrived, a queue of people soon formed in front of her, all wishing to hug, kiss and comfort the new widow. Her husband had always enjoyed good health and regardless of the passing of the years and his increasing age, his death was seen as a tragic event. He had been left in deep coma following a severe and most unexpected allergic reaction to medication, and it was a sleep from which he would never awake. Within a few short days, Bernardo Lemos had left this earthly world.

Inah passed along the lengthy queue of hugs, kisses and murmured messages of condolence, before settling herself down in the chair placed by the side of the coffin. Directly opposite her sat Josué, with the coffin and body of Bernardo between them.

Despite the many decades shared together with her husband and his sudden death, Inah outwardly appeared to be quite calm, not to be suffering greatly, much to the surprise of everyone there and in particular, to Josué. Dressed in black from head to toe, immobile, impassive, and not having uttered a word since her arrival, the old lady seemed somehow absent, distant, almost untouched by events, and this is how she remained until dawn. She sat with her long, thick coat wrapped tightly around her and on her lap was a small black bag, which she held securely in gloved hands, as if it were the most important thing in her life.

Bernardo Lemos had left his mark not only in the history of the small town where he was born and lived till his death, but also in his country for whom he had worked tirelessly. He had graduated in Law with honours as was his wish in his youth, and had returned to the town of his birth to open up his own practice, subsequently becoming one of the most sought after lawyers in the region.

He was a man considered by his colleagues to have been very correct in his demeanour, always dignified and ethical. The legal cases he undertook were carefully studied, dissected and evaluated until he had a full and fair understanding of what should or could be done. His clients undoubtedly worshipped him. They felt very secure and trusted greatly the judgement of this man of small stature and few words, a man who would pursue justice doggedly and seemed genuinely to care about them.

Bernardo was also a man with many loyal friends who idolised him. He knew how to keep a secret better than most others, a valuable asset for those in need of unburdening themselves. He listened attentively and only ever gave his opinion if it was asked for, and even then he had the good sense to carefully search for exactly the right words and the honesty to tell the truth. His friends recognized this talent and repeatedly abused his good will. Bernardo often found himself on the receiving end of their moans and complaints about problems at work or marital difficulties. He never failed to listen attentively and always thought deeply before responding with measured and sound advice. His friends invariably left his office feeling happier than when they entered, with complete faith that their secret would remain just that.

Bernardo had also been a great orator and when in front of an audience he overwhelmed them with his wisdom and good humour. He could relate complex cases in a simple way, which