I'll Grieve Tomorrow

By D. K. Graham

When Marnella Paxton finally got the courage to leave her verbally abusive husband, she only knew she needed to get away, to go somewhere to find out who she really was. She knew she wasn’t as stupid and idiotic as her husband kept telling her she was. But who was she, really?

As she headed away from the home in Kansas City where she had lived for the past ten years, ever since marrying Pat, she had no real idea of her destination. By the time she got to Des Moines, her mind was made up. She went to a national bank and transfered half of her and Pat’s savings and checking accounts, and all of her private savings account into one checking account in her name only.

The next day she decided she would head to Michigan to find out about her family’s roots. Her parents were from a little town called Westford. She thought that would be a good place start.

On the way, she stopped by a Radio Shack and purchased a prepaid cell phone, cancelling the account to her old one. With the new number, Pat would have no way of reaching her. She called her sister Geri to let her know the new number, and to tell her where she was heading and why.

Neither woman had any idea of what was in store for them as Marny uncovered their family’s past; dealt with the present, which included Pat’s surprisingly violent nature; and came to terms with the wonderful future she could have, if she only believed.

• Language: English
• Publisher: D. K. Graham
• Release date: Jun 21, 2012
• ISBN: 9781476010427

D. K. Graham

Working with words has been a major part of D. K. Graham’s career as she worked as a proofreader and classified advertising salesperson for several newspapers across the nation, and as a temporary line editor for the Petoskey (Michigan) News Review.She holds a certificate of completion from the Parish School of Classified Advertising, where she learned copywriting for successful advertising.She was also the editor and publisher of the school district newsletter for the Hiawatha, Kansas Unified School District 415, where she was secretary to the Superintendent of Schools for sixteen years.During her junior high and high school years, she had poems published in the local (Camarillo Daily News) newspaper, was the historian for the Horizon Club (senior Campfire Girls) Camarillo, California chapter, and was responsible for having the monthly meeting articles published in the local newspaper. She was senior class editor of her high school year book.She spent one year at Ventura (CA) Junior College, where she majored in English.She is retired from her position as an administrative assistant for a geotechnical engineering and construction testing firm in Reno, Nevada.K is an active member of the St. Joseph Writers Guild in St. Joseph, Missouri.She has three grown daughters, three sons-in-law, and two grandchildren. She lives in Hiawatha, Kansas with her husband Walter. Her friends and family just call her K.

Book preview

I’ll Grieve Tomorrow

by

D. K. Graham

Copyright 2013 by D. K. Graham

Smashwords Edition

This ebook is licensed for your personal enjoyment only. This ebook may not be re-sold or given away to other people. If you would like to share this book with another person, please purchase an additional copy for each recipient. If you’re reading this book and did not purchase it, or it was not purchased for your use only, then please return to Smashwords.com and purchase your own copy. Thank you for respecting the hard work of this author.

Dedicated to my husband Walt who made it possible for me to retire and devote my time to writing, and to my mother Mildred Elaine Graham, who has always believed in me.

Table of Contents

I’ll Grieve Tomorrow

About the author

Other eBooks by D. K. Graham

Contact the Author

CHAPTER ONE

Marny filled out the check-in form at the first motel on her journey. She would be so glad when she finally was at a point where she could settle down into a home of her own. Staying at motels was for the birds. In her careful penmanship, she entered Marnella D. Paxton, gave her sister’s address as her own, and put her cell phone number in the box marked Telephone. She had no real address of her own yet, and Geri had agreed to let her use the address in Kansas City as her own. After entering the license tag number from her car, she pulled out her wallet and handed the Visa debit card to the lady behind the desk.

Once she had settled into her motel room, she used her cell phone to call her sister. It was important to her that someone knew where she was, someone whom she could trust to keep her whereabouts a secret. It was probably no big deal if he were to figure out where she was, but she wasn’t ready yet to deal with that reality. A month or two on her own and maybe she could get her head cleared enough to think straight.

Marny chatted with Geri for several minutes, asking about the children and how they were doing in their new classroom. It was the first week of September, and twins Shelly and Jimmy were in first grade. Her niece and nephew were certainly growing fast! It seemed like only yesterday they were toddlers, climbing on her lap and asking to have a story read. Where did the time go?

Enough of this, already! she thought to herself. She needed to plan what she was going to do tomorrow, and where she needed to go to accomplish it. She pulled out her laptop and booted it up, typed Westford, MI into the search engine, and proceeded to click her way through the businesses listed on the site. The Westford Library would probably be a good place to start. There didn’t seem to be a newspaper office, but maybe she could find one in a town close by that would have some information. Maybe the local school district office would be able to give her some information, although it was doubtful with the privacy laws now in force. She just knew she needed some answers before she could figure out the rest of her life.

A little over ten years before, and just after completing four years of college, Marnella Diane Martin had married her high school sweetheart, Patrick Pat Wayne Paxton. She knew he was a little bit controlling, but thought it was just due to his insecurity issues. He was the middle child in a family of five children. He had always felt that he was being ignored in favor of the two older brothers and the two younger sisters. Marny had made it her life’s ambition to show him just how special he really was. What an error in judgment that had turned out to be!

As the years progressed, Pat had been determined to rule their household with an iron fist. It seemed that everything Marny said or did was the stupidest thing he had ever heard or seen. He would just look at her in disbelief when she tried to share a joke with him, jokes that her friends thought were funny. He never wanted to let her explain why she had done or said something. His answer was always, I said I didn’t want to hear any more about it! Then he would walk away. After more than ten long and very frustrating years, one night Marny had had enough. She made up her mind that she would quit her job the next morning, pack her bags while Pat was at work, and simply drive away. She wasn’t sure where she was going, but she just knew she had to get far away from her life in Missouri.

The next morning she called her sister and explained that she was leaving for a while, but that she would definitely keep in touch. She extracted a promise from her sister that no one would know where she was, but she did promise that she would keep Geri informed. Above all, Pat was not to know. She would be filing for divorce as soon as she figured out where she was going to be living.

Geri was upset that Marny would be moving away from her, but she did understand. She had been telling Marny for many years that Pat was undermining her self-esteem, and that she should stand up for herself.

Of course, Marny was never able to assert herself in the face of Pat’s derisive remarks. Pat didn’t seem to think he was doing or saying anything wrong. It was all Marny’s fault, of course. She was so obtuse! If she tried to explain herself, Pat insisted she was just trying to start an argument, and then dismissed her by walking away or turning up the volume on the television or radio.

Well, she had finally had enough. She told herself that she was doing what was in her best interest as she headed down I-36 toward I-35, which would take her to her first stop in Des Moines. She would decide once she was there which direction she would head. She figured she would be there in time for dinner, and might even spend the night in a local motel. In the morning she would decide if she wanted to continue up I-35 toward Minneapolis, or head east down I-80 toward Michigan, or go west on I-80 toward California. There were so many choices, and the choice would be all her own! She was actually feeling excited for the first time in several years. This was going to be fun!

She felt empowered as she pulled into the parking lot of a Holiday Inn Express. With a determined look on her face, she headed toward the main lobby to register for her first night on her own. She paid for it with a debit card. Tomorrow she would go to a national bank in Des Moines and withdraw half of her and Pat’s checking account, setting up one in her own name. She had her own savings account, which Pat didn’t know about, and that would see her through until she could find another job. Things were beginning to seem doable.

As she walked out of the First National Bank building in Des Moines with a checkbook and checks in her name only, she was pleased with herself. She had the checks imprinted with Geri’s address in Kansas City, and her own cell phone number. She had also purchased a prepaid Visa card that she could use for motels and food along her way. She was really on her own now! What a great feeling that was!

She was still smiling as she headed eastward down I-80. She had half an idea that she would go to Michigan. Her family had originally come from there, and she had always wanted to see it. She had been there when she was a small child, but didn’t remember anything except what she saw in the photographs in her late mother’s albums.

Her parents had died several years before, within a year of each other; her mother first from a brief bout with cancer, her father from a massive heart attack. Although it had been quite a few years since their passing away, she still missed both of them acutely. There was a small idea hatching in the back of her mind that she might be able trace the family roots, and thereby feel more connected to them. Geri had thought it was a great idea; she had always wanted to trace her family’s roots, as well. It was hard to do the needed traveling when she had the responsibility of a husband and two young children to take care of, though. Neither of the young women had any idea of what Marny’s journey would mean to their lives, or what the future held for them.

Marny had gotten a late start on her trip to Michigan, the direction she had decided to head. It was getting to be late afternoon when she reached the outskirts of Chicago. She saw a Motel 8 next to a shopping area, so she decided to stop for the night. No one was expecting her the next day, so there wasn’t any need to push on that night.

Once again, she filled out the form at the front desk and produced her prepaid Visa card. She pocketed the key card the young lady at the desk had given her and headed toward the room she had rented for the night. Thankfully, it was located on the first floor, so she didn’t have to pull her luggage into an elevator. She never did like elevators; they gave her such a claustrophobic feeling.

Locating the door to her room, she retrieved the key card from her pocket, slid it into the slot on the handle of the door and let herself in. Flipping the light switch on the wall inside the door, she pulled her luggage into the room and looked around. Not bad, not bad at all, she thought as she looked around. There was a comfortable looking queen size bed. A flat-screen television had been positioned on a long desk with drawers under it. A small round table was next to the window, and two chairs were set on either side of it. She walked into the bathroom and noticed a fairly large bathtub and shower combination, and the usual amenities of shampoo, conditioner, hand lotion and soaps on the sink counter. Yes, this will do nicely, she said aloud.

Making sure she had her room key card, she let herself out of the room to go in search of a nearby restaurant. She was getting rather hungry.

An hour later, she had consumed a personal-size pizza and a soft drink, and was letting herself into her room when her cell phone rang. She looked at the caller ID and saw it was her sister. Hi! she answered. No, I just finished eating supper and am letting myself back into my motel room. I was going to call you in a few minutes, anyway. What’s up?

A frown creased her forehead as Geri told her that Pat had just called and tried to find out where she was. He said he had tried Marny’s cell phone, but there wasn’t any answer. She assured Marny that she didn’t give away any information. He was not at all happy that Marny had disappeared, and said he knew that Geri had information she was hiding from him.

Marny told her sister that she was grateful for her covering for her, and assured her that she had left a note for Pat. She had told him she would be going away for a while, and that he shouldn’t try to find her or stop her.

Of course, that was a red flag that only infuriated him! How dare his wife leave without consulting him! Once he found her, he would let her know that she had overstepped her bounds. He was yelling at Geri as she hung up her phone, not wanting to hear any more of his tantrum.

Marny apologized to Geri for Pat’s outburst, something that came as second nature to her. It seemed that she was always apologizing to people for Pat’s behavior, even though logic told her that his behavior wasn’t her fault.

Geri assured her that Pat didn’t upset her, especially now that she knew that Marny was safely many miles away from him. As they were talking, a call beeped into Marny’s ear. She excused herself for a minute while she checked to see who was on the other line. Quickly, she went back to her sister’s call. That was Pat. I didn’t take the call. Tomorrow I’ll go by a Radio Shack in one of the towns on my route and get a prepaid cell phone. There would be no way he could find my number that way. I’ll call you with my new number as soon as I have it. She was getting good at covering her tracks, she thought. She was paying cash for her gas at convenience stores along the way, and hadn’t used Pat’s debit card since that first night. The farthest he could track her now would be as far as Des Moines. He would have no way of knowing which direction she had headed from there. She actually felt ecstatic about how well this all seemed to be coming together!

Geri said that someone was beeping in on her call waiting, so she took the call. A minute later, she was back on the line with Marny. It was Pat. I should have guessed, seeing as how he just tried to call you. I told him to get lost, and then hung up on him.

I’m so sorry, Sis! I didn’t mean for you to get involved in this mess. If you want to get an unlisted number, I’ll be happy to pay for it.

No, I’m sure that won’t be necessary. He’ll figure out over time that he can’t get any information out of me. Meanwhile, I’ll just refuse to talk to him. Oops, gotta go. The kids are quarreling and need some refereeing. Sleep well, Marny. You are finally free! Go with the wind! I love you!

Marny smiled as she clicked off the call. Her younger sister was really her best friend, and she was lucky to have her in her life.

She flipped on the switch for the light over the small table, sat in one of the chairs and clicked on the television set. She was engrossed in the national news when her cell phone rang again. Glancing at the caller ID, she noted that it was Pat. Guess I might as well get this over with, she said aloud to herself. She clicked the on button and said with a growl, What do you want?

"Marny, Honey! Where are you? What do you