ARE YOU ACQUAINTED with Stretch Armstrong? He’s a gel-filled doll made by Hasbro, whose extremities can be squeezed and pulled in any direction, only to reliably return to their starting position. He wears black underpants, and nowt else. This is considered reasonable, as he has a turbocharged set of abs, and he probably lives somewhere in California.
Despite decades of sales, Stretch’s brand recognition is not quite at the interstellar level of Action Man or Mr Potato Head. Unlike Barbie, there is no billion-dollar film adaptation; presumably because his sexy but
