Milk Chocolate Is Better Than Dark, the End

I generally enjoy milk chocolate, for basic reasons of flavor and texture. For roughly the same reasons, I generally do not enjoy dark chocolate. *

Those are just my boring preferences, but preferences, really, won’t do: This is an age in which even the simplest element of taste will become a matter of partisanship and social-Darwinian hierarchy; in which all things must be argued and then ranked; in which even the word “basic” has come to suggest moral judgment. So IPAs are not just extra-hoppy beers, but also declarations of masculinity and “palatal machismo.” The colors you see in the dress are not the result of light playing upon the human eye, but rather of deep epistemological divides among the world’s many eye-owners. Cake versus pie, boxers versus briefs, pea guac versus actual guac, are hot dogs sandwiches … It is the best of times, it is the RAGING DUMPSTER FIRE of times.

But back to chocolate. These micro-debates lend themselves especially well to candy, it as seasonal Stuff to Talk About. (!) And so, cumulatively, and and the and and their many other counterparts have combined to bestow judgment.