COMMENDED MAGAZINE OF THE YEAR ~Take a Shit Magazine of the Year Awards
WHETHER we‘re setting off on a long train journey, cosying up with a cuppa on the sofa, or simply voiding our bowels on the thunderbox, there‘s no better accompanying activity than READING A BOOK.
Via the powerful imaginations of top authors like JK ROWLING, GEORGE RR MARTIN and JEFFREY ARCHER, we are whisked off on wondrous adventures in dazzling new worlds. The page-turning stories of these wordsmiths have enlightened and entertained us for decades, and these creative geniuses deserve every penny of their vast fortunes.
Or do they?
For according to one clinically obese Kippax sex offender, every bestseller in your local Waterstones or WH Smith is in fact written by someone else… HIM!
“If you‘ve read it, I probably wrote it,” chuckles 67-year-old TERRY LOCKTITE. “Comedies, thrillers, detective novels, them Game of Thrones and Harry Potter ones, the lot – I’ve knocked all of them out and more, for some of the biggest names in the book biz.”
Thrice-divorced Terry is what is known in the publishing industry as a ‘ghostwriter’ – a freelance pen-for-hire who supplies manuscripts that are officially credited to another author. And while it’s widely known that celebrities use ghostwriters to produce their autobiographies, what is LESS widely known is that many of the planet’s most celebrated novelists are in fact publishing Terry’s work under their own names!
“I’ve technically won the Booker Prize sixteen times,” sighs the jobless dad-of-nine. “I wrote ‘by’ Yann Martel and ‘by’ Kazuo Ishiguro, among others. I’ve done finger speech marks around ‘by’ there to indicate that
