As my wrists and ankles were being bound with duct tape in the Utah desert, I resolved to read my emails more carefully. I was standing next to a Chevrolet Malibu’s trunk, open and awaiting my imminent installation within, as part of the Escape & Evasion Driving Experience created and taught by former CIA agent Jason Hanson. I’d been so enthralled by the invitation to participate and its promises of ramming through roadblocks and doing high-speed reverse 180-degree turns, I somehow missed the paragraph about being restrained and thrown into the back of a car.
No doubt the opportunity to master such escape techniques appeals to many, but as a short, fat, out-of-shape journalist whose idea of exercise is lifting a Philly cheese-steak to my mouth, I’m not one of them. I don’t own a firearm or even a decent pair of running shoes—if you see me running, something behind me is on fire. I am the opposite of a survivalist: In the event of a nuclear war, my goal is to die in the initial attack. Barring that, I’ll be the guy on the roof with a sign that says, “Unarmed. House full of money, food, and tools. Please help yourself.”
So it is rather unfortunate I waited until after my plane tickets were booked to read the what I was in for, which is to learn how to avoid being captured by bad guys—and how to escape if they take you anyway.
