INSIDE and out

I wake with a start when I hear Gareth’s key in the door and try to work out how long I’ve been asleep. It feels like ages but can’t be more than 15 minutes.

I feel groggy, the way you do when you fall asleep unintentionally. Mind you, I feel permanently groggy these days. It’s my normal state.

‘Hey, it’s very quiet! Where are the little horrors?’ Gareth breezes in and kisses me hello. He smells of cool evening air and the coffee he picked up on his walk from the station. He smells of the outside world.

‘They’re in bed. Mum came round and gave them their bath and, can you believe it, they all went straight to sleep as soon as she put them in their cots. They never do that for me.’

‘I’ll just nip up and take a peek. Don’t worry, I won’t wake them.’

I have to sit down – I’m overwhelmed

When he’s gone, I feel my eyes closing again. This won’t do. I haven’t even thought about dinner. I’ll