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  • The American Poetry Review

    MARBLE RUN FOR THE INTRAMUSCULAR CYBORGS

    Sep 01, 2021 2 minutes
    AEON GINSBERG

    There’s the tension I’m feeling when I’m anxious and the tension I feel when I have to puncture.I’ve always wanted to stab myself dead but at this point I’m used to the maintenance my body needs—I have the routine made like muscle memory. I’m going to live foreverI’m going to have to respect my body or die. Before medicalization there’s tension in the lacking,and I do so want to task myself with a further need to care for myself like I care for others.Offer me a kindness I’m quick to give away. There’s the tension of falling into the arms of anesthesiaand how I have forgotten again to prepare to be caught; the first incision that splays me open.I don’t always tell the truth, but what I say is a version of it. If I can separate myself from my bodymy body can last forever without me. Oh god, I hope I awake a new type of me.

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