The words of the Torah are the vessels for its wisdom. They are written as black letters on the white parchment . The white is the light of the wisdom of the Torah, but if it were not for the letters we would not know what it says. Similarly our lacks and desires make up the words of our lives. By learning the meanings of the words of the Torah and of the Kabbalah we can understand our own desires more accurately . We look at "zivug", the union of opposites and see how it applies to relationships.