“I invite you to the hearth for a last cup of mead, for the time of killing is at hand, and you are my lamb.”— Opening Line of the Bagdun Olex, The War Dance of House Qevoth***The Legend of COCKPUNCH™ is the tale of a fantastical realm, a universe of the bizarre from the mind of bestselling author Tim Ferriss. Stories are the gateway drug in this Emergent Long Fiction (ELF) project. Characters, maps, artwork, and more will be released over time at cockpunch.com and tim.blog/cockpunch. For other oddities from the world of Varlata, follow @cockpunch and @tferriss on Twitter.