Teal Swan’s suicide-teasing trauma pseudo-therapy has cast a spell over millions. Kaia Ra is an up-and-coming contender, selling divine jewelry and a channeled text about how to transcend QAnon-type nightmares. Both claim to be survivors of long-term Satanic Ritual Abuse and alien ambassadors. Both have capitalized on the chaos of 2020. We discuss the trend of trauma exploitation, Satanic Panics throughout the decades, and social media entertainment finding cover through the pretense of therapy. Then we’ll hear from the pros: licensed psychologists Hala Khouri and Kyra Haglund join Julian to discuss the importance of trauma-informed yoga and cases of abuse in wellness spaces.In the Ticker, Derek examines the snake oil of Luke Storey, Julian reviews the “Health and Freedom” conference recently held in a Bible college in Tulsa, and Matthew worries about QAnons in Toronto who have started speaking in tongues. We’ll also discuss a new phenomenon amongst anti-vaxxers: “Reverse Contagion Anxiety”, which leads them to believe that merely being around vaccinated people will make them infertile or re-organize their DNA. (We can only hope.)CW: Audio clips from Lin Wood and Kaia Ra describing sexual / satanic ritual abuse of children in the context of QAnon mythology (Wood), and personal origin story (Ra).02:24 Ticker44:58 The Jab47:14 Traumatic Influencers1:26:30 Interview with Kyra Haglund & Hala KhouriAll music by EarthRise SoundSystemSupport Conspirituality on PatreonShow NotesLuke Storey wants to sell you a pyramid schemeElectromagnetic Fields & Parental Panics: A case study in how science can bring comfortReporter Sean O’Shea gets yelled at in tonguesSgt. Brown gets suspended for hugging anti-maskersWhen QAnon Came to Canada@selfhealingmama Chloe Angeline with a dire womb-warningChristiane Northrup as Vaccine LysistrataGizmodo investigative podcast series on Teal SwanBackstory on Barbara SnowAffidavit: Snow threatens family members, trashes houseSnow testifies that she’s a terrible court expertRemembering Michelle RemembersBe Scofield on Teal SwanTeal Swan via the BBCSwan via OZYSwan