The rubber chicken joins the fight for $15, as the junior senator from Texas, fresh off his quick sojourn to Cancun, popped up at the CPAC convention. Ted Cruz was in Orlando alongside the former leader and a mob of maskless minions, all there to pretend that Joe Biden isn’t president and that nothing happened at the Capitol on January 6th. Sen. McConnell, now the minority leader, plays it both ways in the fallout of impeachment number 2, showing that there is no issue he can’t squirm his way clear of. And to fix all that ails our country, Lewis proposes a new constitutional amendment that would create pyrotechnic consequences for officials who lie to the public. Let’s get Amendment no. 28 on the books! Finally, in international news, the oldest living person, a 117-year old woman from France has survived the pandemic. In true Gallic fashion she celebrated with Champagne and foie gras. Lewis heartily approves.

This week’s rants include a discourse on how to properly cook chicken, the state of school safety in the Covid Era, the plight of a gay man in Kentucky where things took a turn for the worse in 2016, the fine art of laziness, and as if travel weren’t hard enough right now, why, oh why, do they not serve alcohol on airplanes. The live rants come from Rochester, MN, home of the Mayo Clinic and the best muffins in America.

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