27 min listen
Dragging a Spouse to Therapy…
ratings:
Length:
20 minutes
Released:
Jan 31, 2022
Format:
Podcast episode
Description
The email said, “I talked my spouse into going to therapy.” Another one asked, “How do I drag my spouse to therapy?” Oof. The first person was proud of the “convincing.” The second person got my response:
You Don’t!
(Unless, of course, you want to damn the process from the very beginning… and in that case, drag away!)
Marriage therapy tends to be the default response to a marriage crisis (although the stats would not support this as the preferred action). If there is a problem, time to head to therapy! First task: get a spouse there. By pressure, if necessary.
I think there is a (false) belief that if you can just get them there, the therapist will work some magic and convince the spouse to work on the marriage. The therapist won’t/can’t. And your spouse won’t. Fail/fail.
But why?
There are some Therapy Traps that you fall into when you try to drag a spouse into therapy (I cover the Traps in the podcast episode below). And in the process, you actually cause further entrenchment on the part of your spouse that things won’t work out. Yep, it makes things worse.
I explain why in this episode of the Save The Marriage Podcast. Listen below.
RELATED RESOURCES
Therapy Problems
Can You Save It Alone?
Can Your Marriage Even Be Saved?
Book: Beyond the 3 Barriers
Program: Save The Marriage System
You Don’t!
(Unless, of course, you want to damn the process from the very beginning… and in that case, drag away!)
Marriage therapy tends to be the default response to a marriage crisis (although the stats would not support this as the preferred action). If there is a problem, time to head to therapy! First task: get a spouse there. By pressure, if necessary.
I think there is a (false) belief that if you can just get them there, the therapist will work some magic and convince the spouse to work on the marriage. The therapist won’t/can’t. And your spouse won’t. Fail/fail.
But why?
There are some Therapy Traps that you fall into when you try to drag a spouse into therapy (I cover the Traps in the podcast episode below). And in the process, you actually cause further entrenchment on the part of your spouse that things won’t work out. Yep, it makes things worse.
I explain why in this episode of the Save The Marriage Podcast. Listen below.
RELATED RESOURCES
Therapy Problems
Can You Save It Alone?
Can Your Marriage Even Be Saved?
Book: Beyond the 3 Barriers
Program: Save The Marriage System
Released:
Jan 31, 2022
Format:
Podcast episode
Titles in the series (100)
“How Long?” Trust, Trauma, and Towels: I'm still answering your questions! If you have a question you want me to cover on the podcast, just SEND ME AN EMAIL HERE. Today, we cover "time." Or more specifically, "How Long?" The questions come from 2 listeners, "B" and "J." by The Save The Marriage Podcast