As John and I record: Sam Gaviglio melts down, the Mariners forget how to run the bases, and overall look like a garbage team next to the Oakland Athletics as the losing skid at home reaches eight. It’s pretty clear the Mariners won’t be buyers at the trade deadline, so we talk sweet sweet trading action, baby: who has value, who does not, what pieces might come in return, who we think will be traded and should be traded, and who the team will choose to build around. We also dip our toe into talking about some potential trade partners. We head off into talking about morticians vs. funeral directors for a while and John tells a pretty horrifying story about his time spent playing youth baseball and the sweet smell of death, which seems appropriate while watching this particular game.

After a quick break, we take some Twitter questions and discuss the Mariners in a post-apocalyptic world, this time in a joking manner. We admire Tony Zych’s Camo Thursdays Everydays and fret about Felix attempting to navigate towards his bungalow in the Maldives in the wake of a zombie apocalypse. Speaking of Felix, we discuss what we think the future of the King’s Court might be, and things get a little somber for a while, as they usually do when talking about Felix nowadays. We try to end on a cheery note, with each of us talking about what is keeping us invested in watching the team at this moment, as we determinedly wrest some joy out of the 2017 Mariners.

Later, as I mix the podcast, I will listen to Bread’s “Everything I Own,” decide it’s about Felix, and cry fluently.

Music: Good Old War - It Hurts Every Time; Big Deal - Dream Machines; Bread - Everything I Own

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