In This Episode:   Click Here for the Free Download: DISTRESS SCALE for Before / After Calming Techniques Today’s episode is all about what it is like when a parent struggles with anxiety, as well as some options to heal from and some coping skills to get through the trying times.   My work has been greatly influenced by my work in EMDR, Eye Movement Desensitization Reprocessing and reading books like The Body Keeps the Score by Dr Bessel Van der Kolk and Peter Levine’s Healing Trauma.   I think it’s important to begin with a discussion of what anxiety is and what it is not.  Mental Health clinicians use a book to clinically diagnose Anxiety Disorder called the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders.  At the time of this recording, we are using the 5th edition.  Anxiety disorders can come in different forms. In this episode we’re going to look at symptoms and coping skills rather than a diagnosis. Anxiety can come in many different forms – Separation Anxiety Disorder (I see this most often with children and some teens) , Selective Mutism, Specific Phobia , Social Anxiety Disorder (Social Phobia), Panic Disorder, Agoraphobia (fear of places or situations), Generalized Anxiety Disorder (what I see most commonly in my work) ,Substance/Medication-Induced Anxiety Disorder, Anxiety Disorder Due to Another Medical Condition and more. Anxiety, like the range of emotions that we experience, are all part of the human experience.  Give yourself permission to be human.  It’s important not to judge them good or bad, rather look at the level of functionality that it has in your life.  I listened to an episode of Marie TV with Marie Forleo, with Elizabeth Gilbert, the author of Eat Pray Love, where she talked about the function of Fear.  Fear is ultimately at the foundation of anxiety.  She had a great description of how it’s like fear is riding with her in the car – she puts it in the back seat, not in the front seat, not allowing it to control the radio or adjust the mirrors or grab the steering wheel.  Ultimately, a certain amount of anxiety keeps us alive, keeps us from getting into situations that can hurt us.   Doctors Peter Levine and Bessel Van der Kolk describe anxiety as the smoke alarm in the brain.  It goes off when there’s danger.  When people have an unhealthy level of anxiety, perhaps one of the Anxiety disorders, its like to smoke alarm goes off on super sensitive mode.  There’s a part of our brain called the Amygdala that serves as the smoke alarm.  Our brains are brilliantly wired for our life experience.  So much goes on in our brain to try to allow us to have the best lives ever.  Lots of brain research has surfaced in the last 10 years, but more and more is coming out each day.  All of the coping skills that I’m going to suggest may help you brain function at more optimal level during times of distress.  Please know that these things are not like a light switch, but rather a dimmer, that can help one calm down slowly.  If these things don’t seem to help, seeking out professional assistance from a mental health professional may help you get to the root of these fears on a deeper level.  As a clinician, I’ve seen amazing progress with EMDR, EFT, Art Therapy, Play Therapy, and a body based therapy called Somatic Experiencing.  These types of therapy surpass the limitation of words by incorporating the entire brain and body in the healing process.  It can happen so quickly sometimes, it leaves me questioning if it’s really healed.  Has the person really moved past and escaped from the grips of the Anxiety, Depression, PTSD, or whatever it is they are dealing with, or is it hopeful thinking?  After years of working in this field and seeing long lasting change, I am certain that these types of therapy help- help people get their quality of life back.  And, for parents it allows them to be fully engaged with their children and spouse if they are married.  It can be truly remarkable!  I think everyone can use the