Comedy Across the Cosmos

By J.J. Mammoth

Come enjoy The wonders of what The President does While we are sleeping.. She/He Knows If You're Naughty or Nice.. They have the FBI.. From Time to Another Man Shoe's. The Journey awaits..

• Language: English
• Publisher: J.J. Mammoth
• Release date: Feb 25, 2024
• ISBN: 9798892280686

J.J. Mammoth

J.J. is a star Trooper that was Born at Night.. You Guessed it.. Last Night.. She Might not Remember you. but what she does Remember she is sharing with you

Book preview

Comedy

Across The

Cosmos

BY

J.J. Mammoth

Copyright © 2024 by J.J. Mammoth.

This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, businesses, places, events and incidents are either the products of the author’s imagination or used in a fictitious manner. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, or actual events is purely coincidental.

All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, distributed, or transmitted in any form or by any electronic or mechanical means, including information storage and retrieval systems, without a prior written permission from the publisher, except by reviewers, who may quote brief passages in a review, and certain other noncommercial uses permitted by the copyright law.

Library of Congress Control Number:   2024901461

ISBN:   979-8-89228-067-9   (Paperback)

ISBN:   979-8-89228-084-6   (Hardcover)

ISBN:   979-8-89228-068-6   (eBook)

Printed in the United States of America

Dedicate to Politics, May you find Peace where you Live.

Chapter Index

Chapter 1    The Amazing Bathroom

Chapter 2    The Wacky Witch Doctor and the Michigan Turtle

Chapter 3    The Cosmic Showdown

Chapter 4    The Cosmic Revelation

Chapter 5    Continuing The Revelation

Chapter 6    The Time Machine Bathroom Rescue

Chapter 7    The Time Machine Bathroom Caper

Chapter 8    The Cosmic Horn Honkers

Chapter 9    Putin’s Cosmic Journey to the Present

Chapter 10  The Canada Window

Chapter 11  The Cosmic Heart Attack Extravaganza

Chapter 12  The Cosmic Fruit Discovery

Chapter 13  The Cosmic Mona Lisa Revelation

Chapter 14  The Divine Intervention

Chapter 15  A Heavenly Revelation

Chapter 16  The Cosmic Race for Office

Chapter 17  Jailed Star Work

Chapter 18  Putin’s Cosmic Love Affair

Chapter 19  Cosmic Deceptions and Starry Connections

Chapter 20  Fruit of Discord

Chapter 21  The River of Reckoning

Chapter 22  Cosmic Royalty and a Marriage of Destiny

Chapter 23  Voyage of the Cosmic Ghost Ship

Chapter 24  The Putin-Elon Cosmic Convergence

Chapter 25  The Quest for the Cosmic Egg

Chapter 26  The Enigma of the Golden Egg

Chapter 27  The Cosmic Escape

Chapter 28  The Cosmic Shoes

Chapter 29  The Cosmic Story of the Kings

Chapter 30  A King’s Quest

Chapter 31  The Cosmic Trickster

Chapter 32  The Headless Dinner Theater

Chapter 33  X’s Cosmic Reunion

Chapter 34  The Midnight Escape

Chapter 35  Heather’s Futurist Fright

Chapter 36  The Wild Cosmic Chase

Chapter 37  Judge Comstock’s Cosmic Infatuation

Chapter 38  Star’s Cosmic Odyssey

Chapter 39  Heather’s Cosmic Revelation

Chapter 40  Elon and Putin’s Hospital Deception

Chapter 41  The Cosmic Bug in the Painting

Chapter 42  The Healing Time in Hospital

Chapter 43  The Forget-Heather Rain and the Grand Amnesia Party

Chapter 44  Harley’s Silent Presence

Chapter 45  Trump’s Courthouse Caper

Chapter 46  Judge Reck’s Heart-Wrenching Confession

Chapter 47  Letters of Redemption and Love

Chapter 48  Heather’s Unforgettable Impressions

Chapter 49  Heather’s Devil’s Deal

Chapter 50  The Heartbreaking Transformation

Chapter 51  A Celestial Discussion

Chapter 52  Star’s Time-Travel Dance Mission.

Chapter 53  The Celestial Reunion

Chapter 54  Friendly Reunion

Chapter 55  Piston Joon’s Office Escape.

Chapter 56  Water Money

Chapter 57  Spirit Money

Chapter 58  Brad Dances For STAR

Chapter 59  Heather’s Great Escape: The Magical Trans Am and the Chaos on the Road

Chapter 60  Oakie’s Legacy: Three Days of Resilience

Chapter 61  "A Toilet Water Give It.

Chapter 62  The Cosmic Struggle with Shoes and Mirrors

Chapter 63  Cosmic Conveyance: The Navy’s Brilliance in the Stars

Chapter 64  Celestial Capers: Putin and Elon’s Joy Ride Extravaganza

Chapter 65  Cosmic Connections: The 3-Way Call for Space Money

Chapter 66  The Great Pumpkin: Trump’s Cosmic Tantrum

Chapter 67  Putin, NASA, and the Cosmic Carrot Conundrum

Chapter 68  The Cosmic Confession: Brad’s BLT Secret

Chapter 69  Heather’s Odyssey: Healing the Chain

Chapter 70  Finding Peace Amadmist the Cosmic Chaos

Chapter 71  AA Unites: Sobriety in the Courthouse of World Peace

Chapter 72  Timeless Waves: Sauble Beach Dreams

Chapter 73  Just Another Day in Paradise - A Cosmic Christmas Finale

Chapter 1

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The Amazing Bathroom

In a galaxy not so far away, a most peculiar cosmic conundrum was unfolding. It all started when the world leaders, Presidents Putin and Trump, found themselves in a heated argument over the court time machine’s availability. As sparks flew and egos clashed, they inadvertently triggered the machine, sending them hurtling through the past, one bathroom stall at a time.

Meanwhile, on Earth, love was in the air, but not just any love. It was interstellar love. President Putin, pining for his cosmic crush, Elon Musk, had taken to sending heartfelt holographic messages to the billionaire inventor. His video confessions, complete with candlelit dinners and sweet serenades, were going viral across the cosmos.

Amid this intergalactic turmoil, the Heathers had embarked on a quest for love that spanned the corners of the world. Each Heather, be it Big Heather, Little Heather, or inner/space Heather, was uttering a love prayer that resonated across the universe.

And then, an audacious plan unfolded. In an attempt to resolve the cosmic crisis and finally get some peace, the Heathers and Putin hatched a scheme. They’d leave President Putin marooned on a remote moon with rivers that flowed through galaxies, the ultimate cosmic getaway.

As the moon’s gravitational forces tugged on their spacecraft, Putin gazed longingly at the stars. Elon, forgive me, he muttered, before being left alone with his thoughts and the infinite expanse of the universe.

As the Heathers and their interstellar entourage soared into the great unknown, laughter, love, and war echoed throughout the cosmos, setting the stage for a comedy that transcended worlds.

On a serene evening, beneath a canvas of twinkling stars, three Heathers stood in different corners of the world, united in their love and a sweet prayer for connection.

Heather June Feather, the Navy Princess, gazed at the night sky from her secret beach retreat. With a heart as vast as the ocean, she whispered a prayer that love would find its way to every heart, even those hidden in the depths of the sea.

In the heart of bustling New York City, Heather sky Feather, known for her ethereal beauty, stood on a rooftop garden, her eyes tracing the constellations. Her gentle words soared to the heavens, carrying with them a longing for love to bloom amidst the city’s steel and glass.

High above the clouds, Sky Inner Heather floated with an aura of radiant grace, her presence illuminating the cosmos. She cast her prayer into the cosmic winds, a melody of celestial hopes that love would bridge the gap between worlds.

Unbeknownst to the Heathers, far away in the world of politics and bathrooms, a hilarious and dramatic scenario was unfolding. President Putin and President Trump, each tangled in their own predicament, were about to engage in a cosmic exchange.

Putin, in his intense desire to push the button, was too busy arguing with his clones to notice that his finger hovered over a different sort of trigger.

Trump, on the other hand, had mistakenly ventured into a bathroom that defied the laws of space and time, leaving him baffled and bewildered.

As the three Heathers continued their celestial prayers, the universe held its breath, awaiting the whimsical convergence of love, chaos, and cosmic calamity.

In a world where prayers held the power of stars and love was a cosmic battleground, three Heathers united their hearts, casting a sweet prayer into the vast expanse of the sky.

Heather June Feather, a Navy Princess with boundless compassion, looked up from a tranquil beach, her words like a gentle breeze carrying her love’s intention.

Heather Sky Feather, known for her ethereal beauty, stood atop a glittering skyscraper in the heart of New York City, her voice a whisper in the city’s ear, wishing for love’s enchantment.

In the highest reaches of the cosmos, Sky Inner Heather glowed with ethereal grace, her presence illuminating the universe. Her prayer, a celestial melody, resonated in the void, harmonizing with the cosmic energies.

Little did they know, far away in the world of politics and unexpected encounters, a scene of chaos and hilarity was unfolding. President Putin and President Trump, each caught in their own absurd predicaments, were on the brink of a cosmic clash.

As Putin’s clones argued and one of them accidentally pushed the button, chaos descended upon the command center. But all was not lost, for Brad Powell, the guardian of ethereal realms, was determined to assist Elon Musk in preventing disaster.

Amid the confusion, Trump, who had unknowingly wandered into a bathroom that defied the laws of space and time, found himself in a courthouse, bewildered by the unexpected turn of events.

As President Putin found himself marooned on the remote moon with rivers flowing through galaxies, he gazed at the starlit sky, still pining for Elon Musk, the love of his life. Little did he know that Elon, on the other side of the cosmos, had just received a perplexing holographic message from Putin, confessing his love in a most extravagant manner.

Elon, puzzled and taken aback by this unexpected declaration of love from a world leader he had never even met, watched the hologram in disbelief. Who is this Heather? And why is Putin begging me to see her? he wondered aloud.

Back on Earth, chaos was brewing as the President Putin clones continued their relentless pursuit of the nuclear button. In a zany turn of events, they had locked themselves inside a high-tech control room designed for just such an occasion. Each clone, in its rush to push the button, had inadvertently activated the time-travel feature, sending them careening through various historical moments, from the signing of treaties to bizarre encounters with cavemen.

As the clones desperately attempted to regain control, their misadventures were inadvertently causing ripples through time, impacting the past, present, and future. In a comedic twist of fate, these temporal disturbances were leading them to cross paths with none other than Donald Trump, who was trapped in the time-machine bathroom. Each stall was a portal to a different moment in his tumultuous past.

The resulting chaos and hilarious mishaps left the Heathers, Elon, and Putin’s cosmic entourage with no choice but to intervene. They embarked on a mission to rescue the Putin clones from their time-travel fiasco and prevent any accidental