B: A Life of Love

By Zander Wedderburn

B has Alzheimers and so her long and caring life has been lovingly recollected by her husband Zander. From star athlete, B trained as a Nightingale nurse, then as a midwife. She married, had four children, and became a loving mother and creative home-maker. Then she worked as a community midwife in Fife, an AIDS nurse, and a home care nurse for the independent elderly. Brilliant cook and writer of cook books, stylish homemaker, doting grandmother of eight and wonderful friend to many. This is a personal account of her life and includes a number of photographs to accompany the memories.

• Language: English
• Publisher: Fledgling Press
• Release date: May 4, 2013
• ISBN: 9781905916481

Book preview

B

A Life of Love

Zander Wedderburn

Copyright © 2012 Zander Wedderburn

The right of Zander Wedderburn to be identified as the author of this work has been asserted by him in accordance with the Copyright, Design and Patents Act 1988

Always Marry an April Girl by Ogden Nash is copyright © 1949 by Ogden Nash renewed. Reprinted by permission of Curtis Brown, Ltd., and permission of Carlton Books for UK.

Print ISBN 978-1-905916-47-4

eBook ISBN 978-1-905916-48-1

Fledgling Press 2012

Foreword

B has no memory now, but can still recognise faces. So I started to try to capture my own memories of her, and collect memories of her from other people.

She has had a great life, with her spirit, style, love and charm influencing many others.

I hope I have managed to recapture enough of this to act as some kind of inspiration for others.

The gems are hidden in a necessary biography, but I hope you can find many of them.

Zander Wedderburn

May 2012

Acknowledgements

This little book could not have been written without amazing help from our children and B’s friends and family. Some are quoted in the text, and many others talked to me and jogged my own imperfect memory.

Special thanks are due to the staff at Pentland Hill care home, who have looked after B with really loving care for over a year. It is not an easy job, and I really appreciate their skill and intuitive insights, which often go well beyond the call of duty.

The support of my colleagues at Fledgling Press, particularly Clare Cain and Graeme Clarke, has been a huge bonus. They have transformed the presentation and detail of this little book. They multi-task on many fronts all the time, and yet they were willing to apply their skills and pure genius to this little book too.

Thank you all.

Fledgling Press Limited supports the work of Alzheimer Scotland and will donate £1 for each book sold and will make a minimum donation of £100.

Incomplete

I always felt a half

Till I met you.

It seemed like pure grace

When you gave your spirit

Body and all, sweet love,

And I felt whole for the first time.

Now you’re not always there

And I ache at your absence

Half there and mostly not.

So when for moments you

Flit and flicker in

Paradise returns

And I feel complete again

Poem written by Zander 2005

Chapter One

Born

B was born in Sussex Cottage, Blue House Lane, Oxted, Surrey, on 5th April 1935, when her father was working at the War Office in London as a Captain in the Royal Engineers. Her birth was registered as Bridget Mary Johnstone five weeks later on 9th May, (which is the day I was born). Strangely her father had been at the Edinburgh Academy at the same time as mine, and there was a tale of them having a fight, which they both won.

She had a big sister Gillian, who was born on 4 April 1933. In those days, there was a tax allowance for a whole year for a child born in the tax year. The cut-off date was 4 April, so Gillian won her parents a whole year of tax allowance, but B was late and missed it.

At some point, I