Letters to Santa

By Sara Allen Stewart

Christmas is a time of happiness and celebrations for many people, but that's not the case for 9-year old Kendall Knight. After losing his father in a car accident, at the age of seven, and struggling to adapt to his mother's new boyfriend, he is left feeling hopeless and lost. Can his best friends, James, Carlos, and Logan, help him believe in the magic of Christmas again before it's too late? Or will it take a higher power?

• Language: English
• Publisher: Sara Allen Stewart
• Release date: Oct 15, 2022
• ISBN: 9798215696507

Book preview

~ Chapter One ~

Nine-year-old Carlos sat anxiously, bouncing his leg up and down as he watched the clock above his teacher's desk. It was the last day of school before Christmas break, and he could barely contain his excitement. Tonight, they had peewee hockey practice, and tomorrow, after the game, the guys were coming over to spend the night. His mom was going to take them to the mall for pizza and to see Santa. He had already written and rewritten his list twice, making sure to check his spelling, because Logan told him that spelling always counts.

He glanced over at Kendall, who was sitting two desks over, and felt a little twinge of guilt. He felt so happy, but he knew his friend was sad because Christmas without his daddy was hard. Papa K had died after New Year's almost two years ago and everyone missed him so much.

Carlos sighed. Kendall had been so down lately. He never wanted to play anymore and even said no when the guys were going to play a Halloween prank on Coach Miller. He was always quiet now and went straight home after school.

Feeling eyes on him, Kendall glanced over, and Carlos smiled at him. Kendall gave him a small smile back and went back to doodling on his notebook. Carlos looked at Logan, who had the seat behind Kendall, and nodded towards their friend. Logan

reached over and tapped Kendall on the shoulder, and then whispered something in his ear. Kendall shook his head and went back to his drawing. Logan looked over at Carlos and shrugged.

The bell rang, and Ms. Simmons smiled and dismissed them. Have a wonderful holiday, everyone!

The boys grabbed their things and started out the door. Kendall, could I see you for a moment, please? Ms. Simmons

asked.

Kendall sighed and stopped walking. We'll wait for you. Carlos smiled.

No, go ahead. I have to go home first anyway, Kendall said as he sat back down.

But we have practice, Logan said. I know, I'll meet you there.

We'll see you there. Come on, guys, James said as he pulled his friends out the door, closing it behind them.

James... Carlos started.

Shhhh, James hissed as he put his ear against the door.

Ms. Simmons smiled at Kendall as she sat down at her desk. Kendall, I have to say, I'm a little worried about you. Are you doing alright?

Yes, Ms. Simmons, Kendall said quietly, not meeting her eyes. "You're falling a little behind the rest of the class, and I'm afraid

you only scored a D on your last math exam. Oh," Kendall sighed.

Kendall, please look at me.

Kendall took a deep breath and raised his eyes to meet hers. Her heart nearly broke as she saw the overwhelming sorrow there. It was gone before she could say anything, and he smiled.

I'm sorry. I g-guess I haven't been working hard enough.

She thought carefully for a moment before continuing. Kendall, this is a difficult time of the year for many people – children are not excluded from that. I know it's especially hard when you've lost someone you love, and so my Christmas gift to you is that I'm going to allow you to take the exam again, after the holidays.

Really?

She nodded. I already spoke with Principal Higgins and he agreed. He also said that if you're willing to do some extra credit work, that he'll apply it to your final English grade.

What kind of work?

Well, since Christmas is coming up, I thought maybe a two- page essay on the history of Santa Claus would be appropriate, she said.

There is no Santa Claus, Kendall said quietly.

I wouldn't be too sure about that, Santa comes in many forms. She smiled. Besides, he's also considered a historical figure, so you can approach it from that angle, if you'd like.

Two pages?

Yes, due after the New Year, she said.

Okay, thank you, Ms. Simmons, Kendall said.

You're welcome. Don't worry about it too much, and try to have a nice Christmas, she said, standing up. She handed him an envelope with a note, explaining things to Mrs. Knight.

I will, thank you, he said, grabbing his things. He got to the door and turned, giving her a small smile. Merry Christmas.

Merry Christmas, Kendall, she said, smiling back at him.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

The other boys heard Ms. Simmons tell Kendall to have a nice Christmas and took off running down the hallway and out the front

door. They slowed about a block from school, each considering what they had heard.

He's failing in school, Logan said quietly.

So what, that's just school! He doesn't believe in Santa Claus, James said in a shocked tone.

Grades are important, James. If Kendall fails, it means he’ll have to take the third grade all over again, Logan told him.

And he won't be with us! Carlos said. So, what do we do? James asked.

We help him with studying, Logan said simply. That won't work, Carlos told him.

Why not? Logan asked.

Because he needs to believe in Santa again, Carlos said. How is THAT going to help? Logan asked.

Uh, because it's SANTA, Carlos said, rolling his eyes.

Logan shook his head. He is going to fail the third grade if we don't do something.

We will, James said.

What are we going to do, then? Logan asked, wondering what his friend had up his sleeve.

We ask Santa, of course, James said, as if it were the most obvious thing in the world.

Seriously?

Don't you think Santa can help? Carlos quietly asked his smart friend.

Logan smiled at Carlos. Sure, he can, but I don't think he helps with homework. That's what friends are for.

Okay, but we can ask Santa to help make him believe again, Carlos said.

Yeah! But we better not tell Kendall, or he won't let us, James agreed.

We'll slip Santa a note. Carlos smiled.

That should work. Logan smiled as they headed home.

~ Chapter Two ~

Kendall walked home slowly. He was in no hurry to tell his mom about his grades. He had already been grounded twice because of his poor behaviour and didn't want to be trapped at home any more than he already was.

He turned onto his street and groaned when he saw Brian's car parked in the driveway. Brian was about forty, 6'2", had dark hair, blue eyes, and right now was out shoveling the walk. His mom had been dating Brian for nearly six months, and Kendall didn't like him. He had been staying with them for about a week because the pipes had burst at his apartment building, but they were supposed to be fixed soon.

Why isn't he at work? Kendall grumbled to himself.

Kendall took a deep breath and walked up to the house, stopping when he was suddenly covered in snow. Kendall... sorry, buddy. I didn't see you there, Brian said.

Kendall brushed the snow from his face and glared at the man, biting back a response as he opened the front door.

Make sure you wipe your feet! Brian called out.

Kendall slammed the door behind him and pulled off his boots. Kendall, is that you? Jen called from the kitchen.

Yeah, mom, it's me, Kendall said as he hung up his jacket. He pulled the envelope out of his pocket, thinking about waiting until later to give it to her. Better just get it over with, he thought.

Kendall went into the kitchen, and Jen smiled as she closed the refrigerator door. She kissed his cheek. Hi, sweetie. How was school?

It was okay, Kendall said quietly as he handed her the envelope.

What's this? she asked.

I'm sorry, Kendall said quietly, looking at his hands. Jen opened it and read the note from Ms. Simmons.

Dear Mrs. Knight,

Just a quick note to let you know that I'm worried about Kendall. He is NOT in any trouble, but I am concerned that he has been struggling a bit in school the past few weeks. He had trouble with his last math exam, and his English grade is beginning to slip. I've spoken with Mr. Higgins, and he agreed that Kendall can retake the exam after the holidays. I've also given him some extra credit work to help with his English grades. If he needs help, I'm sure one of the other students would be happy to help him with his studies.

Kendall has seemed very down lately and it's possible it's because of the holidays. I know he misses his dad, and the holidays can make it even harder, especially for someone so young.

As I said, he is not in any trouble and I don't want either of you worrying too much about this. I'm sure together, we can help him through this. Please don't hesitate to call if you have any questions or just need to chat.

Merry Christmas!

– Tracy Simmons

Jen sighed and sat down at the table. Oh, Kendall. What's going on, honey?

I'm sorry, mama, I really am. I'm too stupid to do the work, Kendall said.

Jen pulled him over to her and hugged him tightly. Kendall, you're not stupid, and I don't want you to say that again.

But...

No, baby, you're not stupid. I think you're just having a hard time right now, Jen said as she kissed him on the forehead.

Sure, he said quietly.

Honey, please don't worry about this. Ms. Simmons said you're not in trouble and that they're letting you do some extra work to help with your grades. Why don't we see if Logan can help you with the math?

Mom, I don't want the guys to know, Kendall said. Know what? Brian asked as he walked past them. Nothing, Kendall said.

Kendall is having a little trouble in school. Nothing too bad, though, Jen said, smiling at Brian.

Brian poured a cup of coffee and sat down next to her. Anything I can help with?

No, Kendall said, pulling away from his mom.

Kendall, Brian works in accounting. He would be perfect to help you with your math, Jen said, giving her son a warning look. I don't need any help, Kendall said as he headed towards the

living room.

Jen sighed and looked at Brian. I'm sorry, he's so stubborn.

He smiled. Jen, it's going to take time. He misses his dad and sees me as an intruder. We just need to be patient.

She smiled. I suppose. When should we tell him about you moving in permanently, though?

No time like the present, he said.

I guess you're right, she said as she kissed his cheek.

Kendall went upstairs and quickly changed into his hockey uniform. He stuffed his skates, helmet and gloves into his bag and zipped it up. He went back downstairs and grabbed his jacket. Mom, I'm going to Carlos' so I can ride with him to practice!

Jen came out of the kitchen, Brian walking behind her. Kendall, wait. We need to talk to you about something.

I have practice, though, Kendall said.

I know, sweetie, but this is important and I'm working the night shift for Denise tonight, Jen said.

So, are Katie and me staying at Logan's? Kendall asked. Joanna Mitchell usually watched Katie and Kendall when Jen worked nights.

Jen sat down on the couch and patted the spot next to her. Kendall sighed, dropped his bag, and went over to sit next to her.

Jen put her arm around him as Brian sat down on the other side of her. She smiled as she brushed his bangs back. Honey, we have something we want to tell you.

What? Kendall asked, instantly on alert. He knew that when grown-ups said things like that, it was never good.

Brian and I have been talking, and since this week has gone so well... we were thinking it might be nice for him to move in here with us permanently, Jen said with a hopeful smile.

Kendall's heart sank. W-Why?

Well, lots of reasons, Jen said, looking at Brian. Like what? Kendall asked, clenching his jaw.

With two incomes, things wouldn't be so tight. We'd have a little more money to do fun things. Also, when I have to work nights, we wouldn't have to pay for a babysitter, Jen said.

Mama M and Mama G BOTH said you don't have to pay them, you just want to, Kendall said, trying to come up with a way to keep this from happening.

Kendall, I will NOT take advantage of my friends, Jen said firmly.

Isn't that what friends are for? To help when you need help?! Besides, they're not just friends, they're family! Kendall said, jumping up.

Kendall... Jen started.

NO! First, we have to move, and now you want someone else to move in! We don't need any help, I'll take care of Katie, not him! Kendall yelled.

First of all, you are too young to stay home alone, especially with your baby sister. Second, you will stop being so rude and lower your voice before you wake up Katie. You know why we had to move, and I'm sorry if that upset you so much, but it was something we had to do, Jen said.

"NO IT WASN'T! IT WAS BECAUSE YOU SAID YOU WERE SAD! I WAS SAD TOO AND I DIDN'T WANT TO MOVE, BUT

NOBODY CARED ABOUT THAT!" Kendall yelled, nearing a full- blown meltdown.

Jen's face turned red as she stood up. One more word and you're grounded for another two weeks, INCLUDING hockey.

I don't care, he said, glaring at her defiantly.

That's it! she said as she grabbed his arm and started towards the stairs.

Jen, wait. This isn't going to solve anything. He's upset, and we need to acknowledge that and try to find a better way to deal with this, Brian said.

He is acting out and needs to know that it won't be tolerated, Jen said angrily, still holding onto her son's arm.

Brian held up his hands. I understand that, but punishing him this way isn't really going to help, and it will be punishing the other players on the team. Kendall is one of the best players, and the team is a commitment that he, and you, have made. It's not really fair to the other kids, Brian said gently.

Jen took a deep breath and nodded. Brian is right, it wouldn't be fair. I realize that we just sprang this on you, so I'm not going to punish you for being upset. However, if you yell at us like that again... you will be grounded for the entire Christmas break. Understood? she said, letting go of Kendall's arm.

He nodded as he grabbed his bag and headed for the door. Wait up, I'll drive you, Brian said as he kissed Jen on the cheek.

It'll be okay, he whispered to her.

I can walk, Kendall said as he opened the door. Kendall... Jen warned.

Brian grabbed his jacket. Look, buddy, it's already getting dark, and if you walk, you'll be late. Besides, you'll need a ride home after.

Papa G will give me a ride home, Kendall said, trying to figure out why Brian was being so supportive.

I know he would, but Katie will be at Joanna's tonight, so I thought we could grab something to eat and maybe a movie on the way home, Brian said.

Kendall sighed, knowing he wasn't going to be able to convince the man to let him go alone. Fine.

We'll see you tonight, Brian said to Jen. She nodded. Thank you, she mouthed.

He gave her a wink as he followed Kendall out the door.

~ Chapter Three ~

The boys were already out on the ice by the time Kendall and Brian got to the rink. Kendall rushed to the locker room and quickly pulled on his gear. He got out on the ice and Coach Miller looked at him. Twenty laps after practice, Knight.

Yes, coach, Kendall said as he took his place next to Logan. Why are you so late? Logan asked.

It doesn't matter, Kendall said.

Mitchell, did you want to join Knight for extra laps? Coach Miller asked.

No, coach, Logan squeaked out. Then focus on your passes!

Yes, coach, Logan said as he passed a puck to Kendall.

Brian went up to the bleachers and sat in the row above Antonio and Sylvia Garcia. Sorry we're late. You don't think Kendall will be in trouble, do you?

Coach Miller is pretty strict about being punctual, but he's fair, Antonio said as he watched the boys.

Maybe I should talk to him. It was my fault we were late, Brian said, starting to get up.

You might want to wait until they're finished. He also hates having practice interrupted, Antonio said.

Brian nodded as he sat back down. Thanks for the tip.

No problem, Antonio said, wondering what the excuse was. Kendall was never late to practice, and he knew his young godson was not going to be happy if he had to do extra drills because of it. About half an hour later, the boys were doing push/pull drills, where one player holds their stick in both hands, and the second player holds on and pushes against the stick, attempting to push

the first player as far as they can.

They were on their second rounds, with Logan pushing against Kendall, when another pair of players slammed into them. All four boys went down, sliding along the ice. Kendall had both Logan and another boy on top of him as they hit the boards.

Logan groaned as he pushed whoever was lying across him off. Sorry, guys. I tripped, Travis Miller, the coach's son, said as he

sat up.

It's okay, Logan said.

Kendall had ended up lying on his right side, facing the wall, and wasn't moving. Coach Miller had rushed over when he saw the boys go down. Is everyone alright?

Yeah, dad. Sorry, Travis said.

Coach Miller shook his head at his son. You need to focus on where you're going. Twenty laps after practice.

Yes, coach, Travis said, getting up.

Kendall groaned as he rolled over onto his back. Ow. Are you okay? Logan asked.

I-I think so, Kendall said, trying to sit up.

Stay there for a minute, Coach Miller said. He knelt down next to the boys and checked first Logan and then Kendall's eyes. What hurts?

Nothing new, Kendall mumbled as he tried to stand up.

Stay still for a minute, Coach Miller said, putting a hand on the boy's shoulder.

Kendall froze for a second, and then shrugged the man's hand off. I'm fine.

Are you sure? Logan asked. He hurt all over, and he had been on top of Kendall.

Yeah, just clumsy is all, Kendall said as he got to his knees.

Coach Miller put his hands out. The boys each took one, and he pulled them up. It wasn't your fault Travis lost his footing. Go sit down for a few minutes and catch your breath.

The boys skated over to where the player benches were and got off the ice. Are you sure you're okay? Logan asked his uncharacteristically quiet friend.

Yeah. Sorry, Loges.

For what? Logan asked.

I'm worthless, Kendall said quietly as he shook his head. What? Logan asked.

Are you boys okay? Antonio asked. He had come down from the bleachers to check on them.

Yeah, Papa G, I'm fine. Logan smiled. Kendall? Antonio asked.

I'm okay.

Are you sure? You didn't hit your head, did you? Antonio asked.

No. I'm okay, Papi, Kendall said quietly.

Logan gave Antonio a worried look. Antonio gave him a reassuring smile, even though he was worried too. Kendall only called him Papi when something was wrong.

Hey, is everything alright? Are you okay? Brian asked as he sat next to Kendall.

You're not supposed to sit on the players’ benches, Kendall said without looking at Brian.

Kendall... Antonio said, surprised at the boy's quiet hostility towards the man.

Sorry, I didn't know. Brian smiled, standing up. Don't worry about it, Antonio said.

I called your mom because that was a pretty hard fall, and she agreed that I should take you in and get you checked out, Brian said.

I don't need to go to a doctor, Kendall said, shaking his head. We just want to make sure that you're alright.

No, Kendall said, crossing his arms over his chest.

Brian sighed and looked at Antonio. Could I talk to you for a minute?

Sure, Antonio said, walking a few feet away.

Maybe you could take him? I just want to make sure he's okay. Not a hockey player? Antonio asked.

Brian shook his head. Soccer. I'm originally from Fresno.

It takes some getting used to, but the gear is pretty good at protecting them, Antonio said.

I know... I just promised Jen I'd take care of him, and I really want to make sure he's okay.

Antonio watched him for a minute. Why are you so worried about this?

Brian sighed. Kendall's already upset with me, because Jen and I told him that I was going to be moving in permanently. I don't want the fact that he's upset with me to make him hide any injuries. He is a very independent kid, and I respect that. I also know that I'm probably overreacting, but I need to know that he's really alright.

Moving in? Well that explains a few things, Antonio said, watching Brian closely.

Such as? Brian asked, suddenly feeling uncomfortable with his decision to tell Antonio.

Antonio shook his head. Nothing, just why he's being so defensive. This is already a difficult time of year for him, and I'm guessing he's feeling a bit overwhelmed.

I know. He started yelling at Jen, and then she got upset... I felt horrible. She wanted to ground him from hockey, but I was able to convince her to let it go. It's not really his fault, and there was probably a better way, or time, to tell him. She was so happy about it, though. I thought it would be alright, Brian said quietly.

Let me see what I can do, Antonio said. Thank you. Brian smiled gratefully.

Antonio nodded and headed back over to where the boys were sitting. He knelt down in front of Kendall, who shook his head. No, I don't wanna go.

I know you don't, but your mom wants you to get checked out, Antonio said.

Why? I get knocked down all the time, and I'm fine.

I know you are. I think this is more for your mom than anything. I think she wants to make sure that you're really okay, Antonio said gently.

Like she cares, Kendall said under his breath.

Mijo, I know this isn't an easy time of the year for you. It's not easy for her either, and I think she just needs to know that you're not hurt.

I'm not, Kendall said stubbornly.

I know, but Brian isn't used to hockey, and I think it freaked him out a little bit, Antonio said.

So? Kendall asked, arching an eyebrow.

Antonio decided to try a different tact. I believe you when you say you're not hurt. Really, I do. Maybe you could do this as a favour for me... Please?

Kendall sighed. Fine.

Antonio smiled. Thank you, Mijo. Tomorrow after the game, we'll have fun at the mall, and then we'll overdose on junk food while watching movies.

Okay... but if mom has to work, can Katie come, too? Kendall asked.

Of course, she can, Antonio said.

Kendall still looked uncertain but stood up. I'll go change.

Antonio smiled and nodded as the boy headed back for the locker room. I'll let the coach know.

Papa G, is he okay? Logan asked. I think so. Why, are you worried?

Logan nodded. He's been acting different and won't talk to us.

Different how?

I'm not sure, but something's wrong, Logan said quietly, not wanting Brian to hear him.

Any ideas? Antonio asked softly.

I thought it was Christmas... but it's been going on for a while. Do you think maybe he's resenting Brian a bit? Antonio asked.

He had noticed the subtle changes too, and had wondered if that might be the case.

I don't know, Logan said, biting his lip and looking at his hands.

Logan?

Logan sighed and looked at Antonio. He